


Hailey & Jay

by chicagogirl2



Category: Chicago PD (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-24
Updated: 2020-05-03
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:53:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 34
Words: 117,782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23822626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chicagogirl2/pseuds/chicagogirl2
Summary: Jay and Hailey find themselves in a situation while out on a stakeout. Will Hailey step up and take care of Jay at his most vulnerable hour?
Relationships: Jay Halstead & Hailey Upton, Jay Halstead/Hailey Upton
Comments: 14
Kudos: 112





	1. Stakeout

**Author's Note:**

> This was my first fanfic, published on ff.net back in March 2019! I've never posted it on here, but thought it might be fun to do so now for those who maybe haven't read it before! I have always been an Upstead fan, happy they are finally exploring the possibility. Bear with me as I try to figure out how to navigate this site...lol. This story was set around season 6. Enjoy!

Chapter 1

BEEP BEEEP BEEEP BEEEP.

Jay opened his eyes begrudgingly when he heard his alarm go off. He looked over at the clock, 6:00 a.m. “That time already I guess”, sighed and pulled himself out of bed. He had been having trouble falling asleep the last few nights, the stress of the last few cases weighing heavily on his mind. It didn’t help that he woke up feeling like his throat was on fire, each time he swallowed felt like shards of glass in the back of his mouth. “Great, that’s all I need is to get sick this week, he thought.” He silently cursed Will, who seemed to bring every bug home from the hospital with him. Will was immune to it at this point of course, but since he had been staying with Jay after him and Natalie split, the flu going around appeared to have found its way into Jay’s apartment.

He pulled himself out of bed to get dressed and grab a bite to eat before meeting Hailey for their usual morning workout. Hailey arrived at his apartment at 7 am on the dot and texted him telling him she was here.

Jay grabbed his bags and headed downstairs to meet her. Thankfully, she must have read his mind and had a coffee waiting for him in her car. “The usual”, she said and gave him a smile, quickly realizing how tired he looked. 

“Morning Hails”, Jay started as his voice cracked. He cleared his throat and said, “Mind if we skip the gym today, I’m exhausted.”

She looked at him sceptically, as he never missed a workout, but didn’t push it. “No problem, we have a ton of paperwork to catch up on at the station anyways, we should get an early start.”

He looked at her with his signature Halstead stare and was thankful that she didn’t ask him anymore questions. His head was throbbing and needed the caffeine to kick in before he could wrap his head around the schedule for today. 

When they arrived at the station, Antonio and Kim were already at their desks, Voight sitting in his office. Hailey looked at Jay and laughed, “And I thought we would be the first ones here, these guys making us look bad.”

Jay managed a smile and said, “Kim, you know its before 8 right? Are you here under your own will?” Antonio and Kim shared a laugh, everyone in the unit aware that she was the furthest thing from a morning person.

“Well Antonio bribed me with coffee and donuts, how could I say no.” 

Just then, Voight walked out into the bullpen and said, “Halstead, Upton, my office.”   
The two shared a look and hoped that they weren’t in trouble, it was far too early to be yelled at.   
“Keep the door open.” The two sat down across from Voight as he slid them a file folder.

“Jason Armstrong, recently released from Cook County. Did a stint for possession and distribution.”

“Okay, what does this have to do with us?”, Hailey asked.

“He was spotted at a known stash house in the South Side last night. Narcotics has been sitting on that house for a few weeks now, waiting for the right time to bust, there’s some bad dope in that neighbourhood right now. People have been dropping like flies. Now that Jason has been seen there, and is most definitely on probation, I want you two to find out what he’s up to. If we can bring Jason in for some probation violation, maybe he can give us some information on who he’s working for and flip him.”

“Copy that Sarge, Jay and I will head over and do some surveillance.”

“Sounds good, he usually makes a run around noon. Make sure you have photo evidence of him coming and going, any bags he’s carrying or who he’s with”, Voight said. 

Jay and Hailey left his office and grabbed everything they needed for a stakeout, knowing they were in for a long day.

Once they got set up in a vacant house across the street it was a waiting game. Stakeouts were usually intense and action packed. The one today was hardly anything to write home about. It was after lunch now and no sign of Jason, or anyone really heading in and out of the stash house other than a pizza delivery guy pulling in to the house next door.

Jay had been fighting a headache all morning and sitting in a dark, quiet room didn’t help him in his fight to keep his eyes open. His body was starting to ache and felt the chills setting in.

“You can close your eyes for a few minutes you know, I won’t tell anyone”, Hailey chuckled.

Jay smirked back at her, “I may just take you up on that offer.”

His comments took her by surprise, she figured he would have a sassy reply and tell her to mind her own business. She knew he had been struggling this week, as much as he didn’t want to admit it. Will moving in was an adjustment for him, on top of a few stressful cases at work. Jay didn’t handle times like these very well, and she got the feeling that he had been having some nightmares again. She caught him sleeping in the lunch room a few days ago and he just looked….troubled. Face scrunched up in pain, cold sweats, and nearly punching Adam as he tried to grab his shoulder and shake him awake. 

“You okay Jay?” 

It was a simple question, but Jay knew what she meant by it. 

“I’m okay Hails, just a headache.”

She looked at him like she didn’t buy it, but never asked anything else. They sat the next few hours in silence.

At about 2 o’clock, Jason Armstrong finally pulled up to the house.

“Finally, okay Jay check this out, this is our guy. Grab some photos of his license plate.” Jay quickly zoomed in on the plates and followed Jason through the camera lens into the house.

Armstrong was in the house for no more than ten minutes, and came out with a duffle bag in hand. Hailey and Jay snapped a bunch of pictures and passed on the license and car information to Antonio over the radio. They waited for their next instructions.

Hailey looked over at Jay, who was fighting to keep his eyes open. She was just now noticing how flushed his cheeks looked and saw that he had taken off his jacket, even though it was barely above freezing.

“Jay are you sure you’re alright? You don’t look very well,” sounding a little more concerned than usual. 

He cleared his throat a few times and finally gave in to what his body was screaming at him all day. “Not feeling the best. I think I’m getting sick, Will had something earlier this week. Must be catching up to me”, he smiled weakly. 

Hailey quickly reached over and felt his forehead with the back of her hand, not surprised by how hot his skin felt. 

“I knew it, she said shaking her head. Jay you’re burning up, why didn’t you say anything?”

“I don’t know, we had things to do today. Criminals to catch.”

Hailey laughed, “You need to take care of yourself too, you are notoriously bad at it. I know you haven’t been sleeping well either, it was bound to catch up with you at some point.”

Jay loved that Hailey could read him so well, even though it was sometimes a curse. 

“Ya well, do you think these photos are enough for now? I am about ready to call it a day.”

“I think we should be okay, Antonio is running Armstrong’s information now. If anything jumps off, the rest of the unit can handle it. I’ll tell Voight we’re taking off early. We did have an earlier than normal start, I’m sure he’ll be fine with it.”

“We’re?” Jay looked at her curiously, wondering what she meant by that.

“I’m taking you home Jay, you need to get some rest.”

“You don’t have to do that Hails, I don’t want you to get sick.”

“We’ve been cooped up in this room together all day, damage is already done. Plus, its part of our thing you know?”

“I thought our thing mostly involved alcohol.”

“That too, Hailey chuckled, but partner privileges also extend to sickness. I make a mean pot of soup.”

Jay rolled his eyes, but the thought of Hailey playing nurse secretly enticed him. Even though he could never tell her how he really felt, it was nice to know that she was in his corner. 

“Plus I did drive you to work this morning, so unless you were planning on walking home…” Hailey trailed off as Jay managed a laugh. 

“True, I did kind of forget about that detail, must be the fever talking.” 

She held her hand out to get him up off the chair, helping him put his jacket back on, silently wondering if this was a good idea. She had been thinking about Jay’s comments to her a few weeks back, and it made her heart flutter. Things between them had felt more complicated lately. She was still seeing Adam, but Jay was often on her mind, and she didn’t know how to feel about it. 

“We’re good Hailey, and we’re always going to be good.” His words echoed in her mind.

Hailey wasn’t happy that Jay was sick, but she was happy they could spend some time together, even if that meant taking care of him. She sent a quick message to Voight that they were heading home for the day and went out to start the car. By the time she got back she could tell Jay was starting to fade, his eyes were closed and a thin layer of sweat was starting to form across his forehead. 

“Okay partner, let’s get you home.” Hailey placed her hand on his lower back and guided him to her car, making sure he stayed on his feet. 

“Close your eyes Jay we’ll be home soon.”


	2. Fever

Chapter 2

The ride across town to Jay’s place in the West Loop was relatively uneventful, except for the odd snore coming from her passenger. Hailey looked over occasionally to make sure he was still breathing, she wasn’t used to seeing him in this deep of a sleep. “He must have really needed this”, she thought. Jay had fallen asleep almost instantly.

She considered stopping for some soup supplies but figured she would test her luck in Jay’s kitchen, the thought of that making her laugh nervously. The odds of Jay having a fully stocked pantry were slim to none, but she decided to give him the benefit of the doubt anyways. She just needed to get him home to his bed. 

After driving around the block a few times, she finally found a spot outside of his apartment. She shut the car off and decided to give him a few extra minutes of shut eye. After sending off a few emails she reached over and gently rubbed his arm.

“Jay, we’re home now, wake up.”

She was hesitant to wake him, she knew how jumpy he got when he was being woken up unexpectedly. The last thing she needed was for him to have a panic attack in her car.

A few seconds later Jay started to come to. He opened one eye slowly and realized where he was. 

“Ughhhh,” was all he could manage.

“I know, I know. Almost there. She came over to his side of the car, opened the door and pulled him out. He didn’t even try to resist her help, just stood there in a daze as she grabbed their bags. 

Thankfully his building had an elevator, the stairs would have been impossible today. Hailey reached into Jay’s coat pocket, pulled out his keys and opened the front door.

She walked in and helped Jay over to the couch for now. “Impressive”, she thought as she looked around, his place was surprisingly clean. She couldn’t even remember the last time she was over here, they usually met at her place or a bar somewhere. 

“Jay do you have any Tylenol?”

“Bathroom, above the sink.” Jay sat on the couch hunched over with his head in his hands, just wanting the throbbing to stop. 

Hailey came back with a few pills and a glass of water. “Here, take these” as she put her hand on his back. 

Her cold hands startled him and he winced as he swallowed the medicine.   
“Come on I’ll help you to your room.”

Jay was beginning to feel dizzy on top of everything else, seeing stars as he stood up too quickly.

They walked slowly to his room and he sat down on the end of his bed, silently hoping Hailey would leave him alone long enough so he could change into more comfortable clothes. 

She sensed that he wanted some privacy ,so she left the room and went to go put on a pot of tea. By the time she went back to check on him she had to laugh out loud. 

He had managed to change his bottom half, but sat there on the edge of his bed with no shirt on, looking defeated.

“Having some trouble”, she said cheekily.

“Wow way to kick a guy when he’s down Hails” forcing a smirk. “The room is spinning.”

She chuckled, but went over to him and helped him pull his t-shirt over his head, noticing a small scar lining his collarbone that she had never seen before. 

“What’s this from?” She ran a finger over it gently.

“Shrapnel caught me under my vest over in Afghanistan. When we drove over an IED. Hurt like a son of a bitch.”

She looked down, avoiding eye contact, knowing how painful it was for him to relive his time in the Army. “Oh. Sorry, I didn’t mean to bring that up.”

“It’s okay, it was a long time ago. I forget that it’s there sometimes”, absentmindedly running his own hand over the scar. He surprised himself by how easy it was to blurt that out to her. He usually didn’t talk about his tours with anyone, but with her it always felt different, therapeutic even.

She broke their silence by saying, “I made tea, do you want some?”

“Yes please, my throat is killing me”, he pulled the covers over his aching body as he started to shiver. 

Hailey propped a few pillows up behind him so he could sit up comfortably, and handed him his mug. She sat down next to him on the edge of the bed and felt his forehead again.

“You still feel warm, hopefully the Tylenol kicks in soon.”

“Hope so. This sucks.”

They finished off their tea and Hailey grabbed his empty mug. “I’m going to go put some soup on okay, you should try and get some sleep.” She pulled the covers up over his shoulders and shut off the lamp on his bedside table. 

He didn’t like people fussing over him, but Hailey being here- it felt natural, comforting. He felt his eyelids getting heavy, the drugs and tea kicking in. 

As he dozed off, he also thought he felt Hailey’s hand rubbing the top of his before she left the dark room. 

Hailey rummaged through Jay’s cupboards and fridge to gather some soup ingredients, hoping it would be edible. As luck had it, there was a leftover rotisserie chicken in the fridge. “Perfect, this will make a good broth.”

She was putting the final touches on the soup and turning it down to simmer as she heard her phone go off. She quickly picked it up and turned the ringer off, hoping she didn’t wake Jay. It was a text from Adam.

“Hey, you took off early…everything okay?”

She had totally lost track of time, it was almost 6 o’clock now. 

She started and restarted a reply a few times, unsure why she felt weird about telling him the truth. 

“Hey sorry, the afternoon got away from me. Had to take Jay home, he’s pretty sick.”

“Ahh that sucks, okay. You still there?”

“Ya, I am. I’m waiting on Will to get home, didn’t want to leave him by himself.”

Wasn’t completely the truth, she didn’t really intend on leaving anytime soon. But this seemed like the most appropriate way to break it to Adam she wasn’t meeting up with him tonight.

“That’s okay, I was going to tell you to stay put anyways, reschedule our night. The weather is nasty out there! It took me 40 minutes to get home.”

She was so focused on cooking that she didn’t even notice what was going on outside the window. She turned the TV on and saw the news headlines. Chicago bracing itself for record setting Polar Vortex- heavy wind and ice storm expected Monday night and into Tuesday morning. Avoid unnecessary travel if you can.

“Yikes, you’re right Adam. We’ll be fine here! I’ll call you later.”  
“Sounds good darlin, hope Jay feels better.” 

Adam was surprisingly okay with her current situation with Jay, she at least expected some jealousy or questions. But then again, Adam and Jay are good friends, so his response reflected that. Maybe it was her that was over-thinking this. After all, he knows her and Jay are close. This is nothing more than her looking out for her partner. Keep telling yourself that Hailey, said the voice in the back of her mind. 

She heard Jay’s phone going off in the living room. She picked it up and saw a few missed calls from Will. She decided to call him back and let him know what was going on.

“Hey Will, its Hailey.”

“Oh hey”, he said sounding surprised to hear her voice on the other end of Jay’s phone.

“Noticed you called Jay a few times, he’s sleeping right now. I had to take him home early today, he’s pretty sick.”

Will paused, “Oh that’s too bad. I was actually calling to let him know I won’t be home tonight after all. This storm has made the ED crazy today, looks like I’m going to have to stay and help out.”

Hailey’s stomach fluttered realizing she really was going to be stuck here all night. Stuck maybe wasn’t the right word. She was happy to stay and take care of Jay. 

“No problem Will, I can stay here with him. Trying to drive home in this probably isn’t the smartest anyways.”

“Good call, thanks for looking after him. You’re welcome to crash in my room- the sheets are clean I promise” he laughed. 

Hailey made a joke about Will’s love life, or lack thereof, and hung up the phone, promising she would call him if Jay got worse. 

She had just sat down to watch some TV when she heard whimpering coming from Jay’s room. 

She rushed in to check on him and realized he was having a nightmare, his limbs were thrashing all over the bed and he had sweat through his shirt. She quickly turned the lights on and put her hand on his shoulder to calm him down.

“Jay, you’re okay. Wake up, wake up.”

His eyes opened suddenly, sat up in bed, and felt his breathing starting to slow down. He looked and saw that he was gripping Hailey’s arm and instantly felt embarrassed.  
She could tell he felt awkward that she had witnessed such a vulnerable side of him. It felt like he had just shared a very personal moment with her, and she wanted to let him know that it was okay. “You’re alright. Just breathe, you had a nightmare” she said, rubbing his back gently. 

He didn’t say anything for what felt like an eternity, still holding onto Hailey’s hand. 

He took a deep breath in and felt his body relax. “Sorry Hailey. They don’t happen as much anymore. It’s just the fever” he said sheepishly.

She flashed him a half smile, the light picking up her dimples. “It’s okay Jay. I’m right here, I’m not going anywhere.”


	3. Running your fingers through his hair

Chapter 3

The sound of Hailey’s voice soothed him, and he could feel his heart rate slowly returning to normal. He couldn’t believe the fact that he not only had a nightmare in front of her but that he didn’t scare her off and make her run in the other direction. Living with PTSD was not without its struggles, including straining relationships with people he cared most about. Maybe that’s why it was different with Hailey. She recognized when he was struggling and encouraged him to seek help, hell he even pointed a gun at her once during an episode and she barely flinched. That’s what he loved about her, her fearlessness. He was resistant to going to therapy at first, but found it really helped him express the emotions he had kept bottled inside for so many years. Learning to control his triggers was still an uphill battle, but it was something he was working on. 

“Whenever I feel hot, it reminds me of how it felt in the desert, and all of the ugly things that went along with that” he confessed willingly, trying to offer up an explanation as to what she just witnessed. 

She shot a sympathetic look his way, trying to get a read on what his eyes were really showing her. Pain, she thought. “You don’t have to explain Jay, I get it.” 

He quickly blinked and forced a smile, “I’m okay now. Thank you for this”, he motioned down and gave her hand a squeeze, the one that was still intertwined with his.

Hailey knew that Jay was telling her the truth, but she couldn’t shake the fact that he has to deal with all of this, mostly alone. It became alarmingly apparent to her just now that other than Will, Jay didn’t really have many people he was close with, or that he opens up to so willingly. She was glad that he was beginning to share little pieces of his life with her. It made their friendship that much stronger. 

She went over to his dresser and pulled out a fresh t-shirt. “Here” she tossed it on his bed, seeing the goose bumps on his arms, his shirt was soaked. She gave him a minute to change and came back with a glass of water.

“Drink this, Will said you should have lots of fluids.”

“You called Will? I’m not dying Hailey.” He looked at her with a smile and an eyebrow raised.

She smirked and rolled her eyes, “More like he called your phone a few times, I just gave him the short version of our afternoon. He was calling to tell you he has to stay at the hospital tonight, busy with the storm.” 

Jay looked out his bedroom window for the first time and was surprised by what he saw. 

“Whoa, didn’t know this was supposed to happen tonight.”

“Me neither. Looks like you’re stuck with me for the night. Hope that’s okay with you. Will said I could stay in his room.” 

He looked at her and smiled, “I’ve had worse nights I guess.”

She gave him a playful push on the shoulder. 

It was her turn to make a confession. “Like I said Jay, part of our thing. I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else right now.” 

He thought he saw a slight hint of embarrassment as her cheeks turned a shade of red. 

“I appreciate you being here, taking care of me. Not my finest hours.” He tried to quickly avert her glance and change the subject. 

She followed his lead. “Soup should be ready now. Up for a bite?” 

“Soup sounds good Hails, thanks.”

They went out to the kitchen and Jay plopped himself on the couch, his head was still killing him and he was starting to feel worse than he felt this afternoon. He was trying to act like he was on the mend in front of Hailey, but really he knew he was in for a rough night. She brought over two bowls of soup and set them down on the coffee table in front of Jay. 

“Do you want me to feed you too?” She joked.

He shook his head and smiled. “I think I can take it from here.”

Hailey turned on an episode of Friends, “Never gets old” she thought. She knew Jay liked the show too. He once helped her move a table into her apartment and practically killed himself laughing yelling “PIVOT” around every corner. 

She noticed he went a little quiet. “Is the soup okay?”

He snapped his head towards her, like he had zoned out. “Ya the soups great Hailey. A cook too….you know, the more I get to know you, the more I realize I know nothing about you” he smiled coyly. 

“You know nothing Jay Halstead” mimicking a Game of Thrones line as he laughed. In many ways Hailey was just as guarded about her personal life as Jay was. 

They watched the rest of the episode and finished off their dinner. 

“Are you feeling any better?” She asked.

“A little”, even though the look on his face said otherwise.

“Jay you do know that I’m a detective right. Your lying face needs some work.”

“Alright, alright. I feel like crap. My head is about to explode. I keep going from hot to cold, and these chills won’t let up. Are you happy now??”

She smirked at the outburst, knowing he was usually a pain in the ass when he wasn’t feeling well. It was only a matter of time. 

“Do you have a thermometer somewhere? I should probably keep an eye on your fever.”

“Will might have one stashed somewhere, that’s more his department.”

Hailey went into the bathroom and after a few minutes found a thermometer in a basket under the sink. She came back out to the living room to find Jay curled up in a ball lying horizontally now on the couch. She stuck the thermometer in his ear and told him to hold still.

Her eyes widened when she saw the reading, “101.5, guess you aren’t faking it after all” she said half joking half worried. That wasn’t life threatening but she made a mental note to check it again in an hour or so. 

He tried to sit up but his body had other plans. His head felt so heavy, he couldn’t even lift it off the couch pillow. 

“Just close your eyes Jay, hopefully you can sleep this off” as she covered him up with a blanket. She sat down next to him on the couch, his head and pillow nearly in her lap, as she draped her arm over his back to stop him from shaking. 

A few episodes of Friends later, she decided she should check his temperature again. “103…crap”, he was getting worse. Quick Hailey put your medical hat on.

She quietly slid out from under the pillow Jay was resting his head on and went into the bathroom to look for a washcloth. She ran it under cool water, folded it, and brought it out to put on his forehead, hoping it would bring his fever down.

His eyes opened as she put the washcloth against his skin, letting out a small whimper. “Hailey please no, I’m so cold.”

“Jay your fever is pretty high I’m sorry, this is going to be uncomfortable but I have to cool you down” she said as she kept dabbing the cloth along his forehead. 

He looked up at her with bloodshot eyes and randomly said, “You’re pretty you know that”, before he could stop himself.

“And you are delirious right now.” Hailey laughed, but deep down a small part of her hoped it wasn’t just the fever talking, her heart was pounding in her chest.

Jay smiled and shut his eyes again.

A few more hours passed by. Every once in a while Hailey got up to dampen the washcloth and rest it on his forehead, it seemed to be working and Jay was sleeping soundly. She lifted the pillow up slowly so she could slide back underneath him as he laid on his back, his body heat keeping her warm. She couldn’t help but notice the way his hair curled against his face. Stop it Hailey. Her phone started vibrating and saw Adam was texting her again. 

“Hey you never called, you guys alright?”

In the midst of playing nurse, Hailey forgot she was supposed to call Adam tonight. It was almost midnight now and Jay had finally fallen asleep, she didn’t want to disturb him.

“Sorry I never called, Jay’s in bad shape. He’s asleep now, don’t want to wake him.”

“I have to admit, I’m a little jealous you’re snowed in with him and not me.”

Hailey shook her head, “It’s not like we’re building forts and eating ice cream lol.”

She wasn’t sure why she added the ‘lol’ in there, maybe to make it sound less serious than it was. In reality, Jay had given her a bit of a scare tonight, not knowing what would happen if he took another turn for the worse, the weather was too bad to leave. 

“Ya I guess so. Anyways I’ll let you go, you sound busy. Let me know if you guys need anything.”

Even though Hailey wasn’t all in with Adam, she did feel a bit guilty for today. He never once questioned why she was here or why she was so concerned about Jay, even asking how he was. He was a good guy, and she was afraid where this was going to lead. 

She set her phone down and took the washcloth off Jay’s forehead. He felt a little cooler, but still not out of the woods. She hesitated for a second before gently running her fingers through his hair. She kept running her hand slowly over his head and through his hair for what seemed like an hour as he slept, watching his chest rise and fall with each breath.

After a while she suspected he was awake, she could tell by the way his breathing changed. She decided to keep doing what she was doing, and he didn’t let on that he wasn’t asleep. A few minutes went by and he said, with his eyes still shut, ever so quietly, almost in a whisper, “My mom used to do this for me when I was sick”. Hailey was taken aback by the weight of that comment, weirdly touched, that she didn’t know what to say. She wished so badly she could take away his pain, her heart ached for him. Feeling a bit helpless and not knowing what else to do to comfort him, she placed her hand down on his chest, over his heart, letting him know she was there. The silence between them spoke louder than words. He set his hand on top of hers, and kept it there until he fell back asleep while she continued to rub the top of his head. She thought she saw a small tear escape from the corner of his eye. Right then and there, she knew she was in trouble. Jay Halstead what am I going to do with you?


	4. The only way to stop the nightmares is...

Chapter 4

Hailey opened her eyes slowly, no longer feeling the warmth of Jay’s body lying on top of hers. In its place there was a blanket draped over her now, his doing no doubt. She checked her phone for the time, 2:30, I must have been asleep for a while. Taking a minute to become aware of her surroundings, Hailey looked around the room for Jay. He must have gone to his bed at some point, she thought. Then she saw him out of the corner of her eye, hunched over the kitchen sink, looking a lot paler than he should. Hailey pulled herself up off the couch, her neck sore from falling asleep in an awkward position. 

Hailey rushed over to him, “What’s wrong?”

He motioned to his chest, his breathing sounding more wheezy than a few hours ago. 

“Chest pains?”

He nodded silently. “Having…trouble… breathing”, his voice sounding congested.

“You should have woken me up!”

“You needed rest too Hails”, his voice was barely audible. Classic Jay, always putting other people before himself, she thought.

“Jay you sound horrible, you should be in bed”, Hailey said as she reached out to put a hand on his back. 

Just then he broke out into a coughing fit. His body aching with each movement. 

“I think I should call Will, you’re getting worse.”

He just nodded his head in agreement, which to Hailey meant he really must be sick, Jay hated bothering people, especially Will. 

“Come on, come lie down”, she put her arm around his waist and helped him into his room. Once he was propped up in bed, Hailey checked his temperature again. 101. Still high, and she couldn’t give him any more Tylenol for a few hours. At this point the only thing she could do was to call Will. She didn’t want to bother him either, but felt nervous for Jay. She peaked out the window and could barely see the roads. All she could hear was the sound of freezing rain and the wind howling at the side of the building. 

Will’s cell rang a few times before he picked up.

“Hey, it’s Hailey. Jay has really gone downhill, I don’t know what I should do.”

“Hey, Will said sounding concerned, what’s going on?”

“His fever has been between 101-103 for the last few hours. I’ve given him as much Tylenol as I can and have been keeping a cool washcloth on his forehead but he’s still burning up. And now he has a really bad cough, complaining of chest pains and having trouble breathing.”

Will could tell Hailey was nervous, an odd side of her, from everything Jay has told him about her and what he’s seen himself, she’s usually pretty calm and collected.

“That’s good, you’ve been doing the right thing Hailey” trying to reassure her. He could hear Jay coughing up a lung in the background. “Is he throwing up? Achy?” 

“Not throwing up, but yes achy. Definitely has the chills too.”

“Okay, it sounds like he has pneumonia. I mean I can’t tell for sure without looking at him, but everything you described is textbook symptoms. He’s been fighting a cold all week, unfortunately that can lead to pneumonia, and come on quite quickly.”

“Okay so what should I do?”

“Unfortunately not much, you have to let it run its course. The best thing you can do for him is to keep him comfortable so he can get some sleep. Also, try to avoid giving him cough medicine. As annoying as it is, the coughing will help clear his lungs. Make sure he’s drinking lots of fluids too.”

“Okay I can do that. What about his breathing though, he’s really struggling right now.”

“Try running the shower, really hot water, get him to sit in the bathroom. The steam will help loosen up his chest. Not a cure by any stretch, but it will make it easier to breathe.”

Hailey couldn’t help but notice how calm Will was. Doctor mode I guess. “What if he gets worse than this?” 

She sounded quiet on the other end of the phone. Will replied, “Well let’s hope it doesn’t come to that. Hailey I don’t want you driving, the weather is terrible. Just do what you can to keep him comfortable, trust your gut, he’ll be okay.” 

Very vague advice, she thought, almost laughed. “Okay thanks Will.”  
“Hailey I have to go I’m being paged, I’ll keep my phone on. I’m so sorry I couldn’t come home tonight, thank you for staying with him. He owes you!”

She chuckled, “You bet he does.” 

Will thought about asking her if he had any nightmares, he usually does when he’s sick, but held back. He didn’t want to scare her any more than she already was. 

She hung up her phone and gave Jay a once over. He was staring off into space and trying to concentrate on his breathing, a slight panic in his eye. 

“Jay”, she said calmly. His eyes shot back into focus, those baby blues staring right at her. “Will thinks you have pneumonia. Let’s go sit in the bathroom, the steam from the shower will make it easier to breathe, okay?”

He nodded and sat up slowly, giving in to the fact that he had to rely on her. 

Hailey got the shower going and the steam started to flood the room. Jay leaned against the shower door and sat down on the floor, the warmth from the glass feeling good on his back, his body was so sore. Hailey wasn’t sure if she should stay in there with him or not. It’s like he read her mind and motioned for her to come sit with him. 

She smiled behind the mask of steam that clouded the room, and took a seat next to him. His head found its way onto her shoulder, and she felt his body start to relax into hers, his eyes slowly drooping. It sounded like he was breathing easier. Thank goodness. 

The steam was actually soothing for Hailey too, this has been a stressful night. She was pretending that she was at a spa in the sauna room. Jay was still coughing quite a bit, but Will said that was a good thing. His body was dead weight leaning into her side, so she slowly brought him down parallel to the floor, cradling his head and setting it down gently on the top of her thighs. He had sprawled his arms out over her legs, letting out a snore every once in a while. Hailey was just glad he was actually resting. Good thing his bathroom floors are heated, her backside starting to get a bit numb. The hot water lasted about 40 more minutes. An hour had past by and she had snuck a nap in there too, her body was craving shut eye. She decided to wake Jay up. 

He turned over on his side to her, his eyes widened as he realized his head was in her lap.

“Ahhh. Sorry Hails. This is awkward.”

“It’s alright Jay” she smirked. “How are you feeling?”

“A bit better. For real this time” he smiled weakly. 

“I’m going to go make you some tea okay. It will help your cough. You should try and go back to bed now.”

“Okay.”

Hailey got up, turned the shower off and pulled Jay up from the bathroom floor. 

“Jay you should get out of those clothes, they’re damp from the steam.” Hailey helped him pull his shirt over his head.

“You know, you could at least buy me dinner first” Jay said with his signature smile. Hailey couldn’t help but laugh. 

“At least you still have your sense of humour.”

“You can borrow a hoodie if you want Hails, your clothes are wet too.”

“Thanks Jay.” She went searching in his closet and pulled out an old Blackhawks sweater, glad that he offered because she was feeling a little chilly herself. 

She was out in the kitchen making their tea when she heard him coughing violently again. Well that was short lived. She added some honey to his tea, hoping it would coat his throat and keep him from coughing so hard. It sounded like he was going to make himself sick in the other room. She came back into his room and set the mug down on his bedside table. 

“Here”, she brought the mug closer to him. His body was so weak that he couldn’t even bring his arms up to grab it. She looked at him with sympathy in her eyes, he looked embarrassed.

“It’s alright, I got it” she said softly. She brought the mug to his lips, slowly tilting it back. “Small sips Jay”. She did that until the tea was finished and he looked a little better, less lethargic. She felt his forehead again, seeming satisfied that his fever was down, finally. 

“Maybe you should have been a nurse Hails”, a smile slowly crept across his face.

“Maybe in another life Jay”, flashing her dimples at him again. Her words echoed in his mind, almost like she meant that in more ways than one. His eyes became heavy and his mind slowly drifted into sleep. 

Jay’s cough had finally settled down and Hailey was sure his fever had broke as well. For now anyways, she thought. Maybe he could at least get a few more hours of uninterrupted sleep. She watched him sleep for a few more minutes and pulled the covers over his body, turned off the lights and shut the door quietly. It was pushing 4:30, and although her body was tired her mind was wide awake. She made her way out to the living room to fall asleep to some Netflix.

The sun was starting to peak through the window and Hailey woke up startled to hear Jay yelling from his room. Oh no, another nightmare. His fever must have spiked again. She cautiously opened his door and found him rolling around the bed, whimpering in his sleep.

“Jay, breathe. Jay, it’s me, wake up.” She sat on the edge of his bed and grabbed his shoulder. He shot up in bed and for a second, she thought he might hit her, he seemed disoriented and had his fist up. She quickly went on the defence and tried talking him down. “Jay, you’re alright, it’s just me.” He looked at her and immediately started apologizing. “Hailey I’m so sorry, I’m sorry.” She didn’t say a word, just leaned in to give him a hug, feeling his heart racing against his bare chest.

“You’re going to be okay Jay.” Rubbing small circles in his back, he rested his head on her shoulder. Her thoughts confirmed. “You feel warm again.” She went into the bathroom and grabbed a cool compress. By the time she came back, Jay had calmed himself down, although coughing a bit. She rested the wash cloth on his forehead and sat there with him for a few minutes. 

He broke the silence first, “If I have another nightmare again, I want you to leave the room. I don’t want to hurt you.” Her heart broke at the fact that Jay’s first reaction is to push people away. That he thinks he is so undeserving of love or being taken care of. “Jay I’m not going anywhere, I told you. What can I do to help you.”

He hesitated at first to reply. He was used to having his guard up, never talking about his nightmares with anyone, rarely even Will. The only reason Will knew about them in the first place is because they lived together. 

“Hailey, why did you stay?” 

Now it was her turn to hesitate. That felt like a loaded question. 

“You’re my partner Jay.”

Jay felt a bit confused. He knew Hailey cared about him, and he cared for her deeply. There was an unspoken level of trust between them. But she usually was more guarded, less emotional than she had been tonight. Maybe it was just the situation, she was just trying to help him, this is the sickest he’s been in forever. He didn’t want to read further into it than he should. The last few months though, he had noticed a change in her behaviour with him. Things felt different, complicated even. Like they were dancing around an elephant in the room. He decided to go for it, put it all out on the table. Now seemed as good of a time as any, he just had to work up the nerve. 

“Hailey, can I ask you something?”

“Of course.”

“What’s changed between us?”

“What do you mean?” She responded casually, but on the inside felt butterflies, knowing deep down where this conversation was heading.

“You’ve been different with me, the last few months…. ever since I got shot. Don’t think I haven’t noticed.”

This was it. They were finally talking about this. 

She took a deep breath in, ready to put it all on the table, the emotion creeping up in her voice already. 

“Jay when we came around the corner and saw you lying on the ground, I thought you were dead. It scared the life out of me, that I had lost you. I never want to feel the way I felt that day again”, her eyes meeting his, tears welling up in the corners.

It was his turn to reach out and grab her hand to comfort her. He didn’t realize how much that day affected her, she was so raw and honest in telling him now. 

“And afterwards, Adam and I went out for drinks. I was so stressed and upset that I wanted to let off some steam. One thing lead to another, and ya…here we are” she said trailing off.

She didn’t need to add that last part in, but if they were being honest with each other, she wanted him to know how her and Adam got together in the first place and why.

Jay sat there with his mouth slightly open, it finally clicked in his head. He knew Hailey and Adam had been together for a while, but never really connected the dots as far as the timeline of it all. Her offering up that last comment made this whole thing make way more sense now. 

“So if I didn’t get shot”, he was treading lightly with his next words, “You and Adam would have never hooked up?”

Hailey just stared at him for a second and eventually shook her head. “Hard to say, but I don’t think so.”

Jay nodded, knowing what she really meant by that, the look on her face said it all. 

She so badly wanted to tell him I wish I could have been with you instead of Adam that night. 

Jay’s mind was racing, he was glad they finally talked about this. It felt like a weight off his shoulders. Hailey had been so honest with him, and he wanted to return the favour.

“Hailey. I’m not going anywhere either. Whatever happens with you and Adam, I’ll be here okay. However long it takes” squeezing her hand as she looked back intensely at him.

That was the most forward he had been with anyone since Erin. He knew she understood.

Hailey was in it for the long run and so was he. If that meant waiting for the right time, then so be it. He would do that for her, no matter how complicated things were. 

They looked at each other in silence, nodded, and shared one of their looks, where no words needed to be said. Maybe there was a chance after all.

The sunrise spilling into his room lit up the side of her face, and made her blonde hair shine in the morning light. 

“You should go back to sleep, you’re still really sick” she said quietly, going back into caregiver mode. Trying to pretend that potentially life changing heart to heart didn’t just happen. 

He nodded, and let out one last dark secret, letting her decide what she wants to do with this information. “The only way to stop the nightmares is if someone holds my hand, or me, when I sleep.”

She gave him a curious smile, “Copy that”. 

He slowly closed his eyes, half expecting Hailey to leave his room again. He was just about to fall asleep when he felt her hand slip under his, a small smile creeping across his face.


	5. Sleep, together

Chapter 5

Will could not wait to get home, what a 24 hours it had been. The emergency department was slammed. Between car accidents, people slipping and falling, a toddler with a piece of Lego stuck up his nose, he had seen it all. All he wanted to do was to get home and take a long hot shower and sleep for the next twelve hours. The drive home had also been a nightmare, the snow had stopped, but the roads were a sheet of ice. Not to mention it was colder than Antarctica today, according to the news. He was trying to get home as quick, and safely, as possible so he could hide out in Jay’s apartment until this passed by. The only cars on the road were snowploughs and emergency services. Never a good sign, felt a bit eerie really. By the time he got back it was just after 9 in the morning. He wasn’t sure what he was going to find, with Jay and Hailey, hopefully they both managed to get some sleep. He never heard from her again so he was assuming that meant things were okay. He felt a bit guilty for a second for not checking back in with her, but knew if things got bad she would have called. He liked Hailey. Kept Jay in line, and could hold her own with a bottle of whiskey. His kind of gal. 

Will opened the door to Jay’s apartment quietly and was immediately hit by the smell of home cooking. He set his bags by the front door and surveyed the room. There was a pot of soup sitting on the stove that looked and smelled delicious. His stomach grumbled and it reminded him he hadn’t eaten since last night. Hailey must have made it, not a chance Jay could have pulled that off even if he was healthy, he laughed to himself. Will looked around and didn’t see any signs of Hailey. Maybe she was awake and gone already, he thought, he wasn’t sure what the ‘snow day’ policy was in Intelligence. Today seemed as good of a day as any, but knowing Voight, he wouldn’t be surprised if she still had to go in either. He opened his bedroom door and found the bed made, confirming his suspicion she had been up and gone before he got back from the hospital. He was just about to hop back in bed himself when he remembered Jay was sick as a dog in the room next door and figured he ought to go check on his brother. 

He cracked Jay’s door open ever so slightly and peaked his head inside. His heart swelled at what he saw, his eyes could hardly believe it. They were both lying on their backs, Jay turned in slightly towards Hailey. He was holding her hand as they slept, she was wearing one of his Blackhawks hoodies. Both of them were in a deep sleep, not even stirring when he walked in the room. So she does know about the nightmares. There were many nights over the years where it had been him holding Jay’s hand as he slept. That was the only way he would calm down, was if someone was holding him. So either Jay told her that or Hailey just knew what he needed, both options were interesting developments in Will’s mind. He almost felt….relieved. That Jay was at least confiding in Hailey, he rarely talked to him about how he was feeling. He knew how hurt Jay had been after Erin left and what a struggle the last year had been for him. Some old demons snuck up on him and it was hard to watch him go through that. But, he also knew that it was Hailey who pulled Jay out of his downward spiral and made sure he got the help he needed, he was thankful for her. 

He gave Jay a once over and felt his forehead. Still a bit warm, his cheeks were flushed and his body let out the odd shiver as he slept. Not overly concerning, but he would keep an eye on him today. At least he was resting now. Hailey did a good job taking care of him, managing a fever can be tricky. Plus she was obviously run down herself, and would most likely get what Jay had at this point, after all they did sleep in the same bed together. Partner thing I guess, Will thought a little confused at the sleeping arrangement. But shrugged his shoulders and decided to let it play out. Just as Will was about to leave the room he saw Jay’s eyes flutter open. Jay looked at Will then looked to Hailey sleeping next to him and down at their hands still intertwined. Will looked down and raised an eyebrow at the hand holding. Jay knew exactly what he was referring to and gave him a side eye “I’ll explain later” glance. 

Jay put his finger up to his lips, giving Will a sign to stay quiet. He mouthed, “Shhh, don’t wake her up.” 

“Are you okay?” Will asked in a whisper.

“I’ve been better” Jay replied, his voice not much louder than a whisper anyways. 

“Ya you look terrible.”

“Gee thanks Will, happy to have you home” he said sarcastically. As he went to laugh, he broke into another coughing fit. He tried his best to cough quietly so he wouldn’t wake Hailey. 

“Easy Jay” Will put his hand on his shoulder and handed him the glass of water from the table next to his bed. 

Jay took a long sip and let out a sigh once the coughing fit had passed. He looked over to Hailey who was still out cold, knowing she was a deep sleeper normally. 

“Your fever seems a bit better. Are you still having chest pains?” Doctor Halstead taking over. Jay winced as Will touched his chest.

“A little. This coughing is driving me nuts, just congested now.”

“I know, but that will pass. The coughing will help get whatever is in your lungs out.”

Jay nodded his head. “How are the roads out there?”

“Not good. You picked a good day to stay home in bed.”

“Crap, that reminds me. I have to let Voight know we aren’t coming in.”

“We?” Another eyebrow raise from Will.

“Hailey was up all night taking care of me. I feel bad, she needs to sleep too. Plus, tired people with guns isn’t really a good mix.”

“Fair point. I think you left your phone on the coffee table I’ll go grab it” Will smiled as he turned to leave the room, making a mental note that Jay still had not let go of Hailey’s hand. 

He came back with Jay’s phone and some more Tylenol. 

“Here take this, and try to go back to sleep.” 

Jay swallowed the pills and opened his email to send one off to Voight, then let out a fist bump. 

“Snow day! This never happens.” Jay was secretly a bit relieved, he didn’t really feel like explaining the situation to Voight about why both him and Hailey weren’t going to make it in. Also saves on the interrogation from the group about why they were late, still together, Hailey wearing the same outfit she had on yesterday, all that. He wasn’t in the mood to be subject of the department gossip. That’s something Platt would have picked up on no doubt. Not that anything happened, but in some ways it felt like it did. Other than Hailey, Jay wasn’t especially close with anyone else in the unit. Sure they were all his colleagues and friends, but he never really felt part of the inner circle. Adam had Kevin, Kevin and Burgess were close, and now with Adam and Hailey…. Jay figured it was best to just keep to himself. 

Plus he was beginning to think Kim was on to him and his feelings for Hailey. Probably because she felt the same way about Adam deep down, but that was none of his business. So the less fuel to the fire, the better. Adam and Hailey being together must be killing her. He saw the way she looked at Adam the day her and Hailey were rescued after the kidnapping. He knew because that’s the same look Jay gave Hailey after she came back from the hospital. 

“Jay?” He shook himself back to reality and stared at Will who had clearly been asking him a question.

“Sorry, zoned out.”

“That’s okay. I’m going to bed, I’m wiped. Do you need anything before I go?

“No that’s okay, we’re fine here.”

Will smiled and nodded, “Okay, well I’m just next door if you need anything.”

“Thanks, sweet dreams.”

Will rolled his eyes and laughed as he made his way back to his room.   
Jay quietly set his phone on his night table and turned back over to face Hailey, who hadn’t moved an inch, even with Will in here talking to him. This girl could sleep through a fire alarm, he thought, more jealous than anything really. His arm was asleep, but he didn’t want to move and let go of her hand just yet. This felt right. Stop it Jay. She’s with Adam, a friend of yours. But he couldn’t stop himself from thinking that she looked so beautiful in the morning light, messy hair, mouth half open and all. He wanted to remember this picture in his head forever. 

The Tylenol started to kick in and Jay felt his eyes get heavy again. He pulled the blanket over his shoulders, making sure to cover Hailey too, and fell back asleep.

Hours passed by and Hailey finally came to. She opened her eyes and realized she was still in Jay’s bed, holding his hand. Whoops, she thought, she didn’t mean to stay in here all night, not that she hated that it had happened though. She slowly slipped her hand out from under his and rolled over to grab her phone and check the time. 1:30. In the afternoon? She looked outside and it was definitely day time. Oh my gosh, work! She had totally forgot that it was a weekday and everyone was probably wondering where they were. Thankfully, she opened her email and realized they had been called off for the day, weather was too bad to make it in. Phew, got lucky.

Jay began to stir and stretch himself awake. Hailey turned to face him and found his big blue eyes staring back at her. 

“Morning.”

She laughed, “Actually, good afternoon.”

He looked surprised, “What time is it?”

“It’s 1:30.”

“Whoa we slept late” he said in between coughing, his body still shaking. 

Hailey, looking concerned, reached over and felt his forehead with the back of her hand. Jay closed his eyes at her touch. 

“Mmmm” he groaned, “Your hands are cold.”

“Sorry. You alright? You don’t feel as hot anymore.”

“Not as hot? Ouch Hailey, not something you usually say to someone after spending the night in their bed” he said with a smirk, pretending to be offended.

She rolled her eyes and laughed. “Well it’s not like you bought me dinner first” stealing one of his jokes from the night before. They both chuckled. 

“But seriously, Jay, are you feeling better? You kind of scared me last night.” 

He nodded, “I’m okay. Will gave me some Tylenol this morning.”

“Will’s home?” Hailey suddenly felt a bit embarrassed, knowing he must have seen them lying in bed together, holding hands. She didn’t want him to think anything was going on, Will knew she was seeing Adam too. 

Jay saw the look on her face and knew what she was thinking. “It’s okay Hailey. He knows we’re just friends.”

“That’s not what I mea…”

He cut her off. “I know what you’re thinking. But Will doesn’t care. He was just glad we were both alright. He looked half asleep himself anyways, long night.”

She smiled, her dimples showing again. She paused and took a deep breath in. “So last night was intense.”

Jay sat up in bed and turned closer toward her. “It was.” He gave her one of those looks, the look that made her feel like he was staring right into her soul.

They stared at each other for a few more seconds, then Hailey looked away, biting her bottom lip. Jay put his arm over her shoulder and pulled her in for a hug. 

“Thanks for everything yesterday Hails, I owe you one” He whispered and kissed her on the side of the forehead before he could stop himself.

She was surprised at the kiss, though not a romantic one, still something they had never done before. She smiled and squeezed him back, a bit too hard because he let out a groan.

“Ouch, Hailey, my ribs! Way to ruin a nice moment” he laughed.

“Sorry” she said sheepishly, “forgot about the whole pneumonia thing for a second”. 

The laughter broke up the sudden intensity and tension in the room. He always knew how to make her laugh. “And ya Jay, you do owe me. I’m probably going to come down with whatever this plague is in a few days soooo”.

“You’re lucky Hails, I make a mean pot of canned soup.” He said with a matter of fact smirk. 

She gave him a playful push on the arm.

“Which reminds me, is there any of that soup left?” He asked.

“If Will didn’t get to it there should be. Up for something to eat?”

He nodded, finally feeling like somewhat of a normal human again. “I could eat.”

“Okay good. Do you want me to bring some in here or do you feel like going out to the kitchen.”

“Kitchen’s fine. My legs need a stretch I think.”

Hailey got up and came over to his side of the bed, giving him a hand to get up. He was still feeling a bit weak. She wrapped a blanket around his shoulders and made sure he was okay to walk on his own.

“Hailey I’m fine really.”

“You just look a little pale still, I don’t need you blacking out and hitting your head.”

“Fair enough.”

They went out to the kitchen to find Will sitting on a barstool at the island reading the newspaper, eating a bowl of soup. 

“Well, well, well, about time you guys got up. I was just about to check if you were both alive in there.” 

Hailey and Jay both laughed. “Needed our beauty rest.” 

“Hailey, this is delicious by the way. Jay, you really hit the partner lottery you know that?” Will was testing the waters to see how they would respond. 

He glanced over at Hailey and they shared a quick grin.

“Don’t I know it.” A comfortable silence filled the room.

Interesting, Will thought. 

“But Will, seriously, if you didn’t leave any soup left for us, there will be hell to pay.”

The three of them laughed as Will motioned to the pot on the stove. “I saved you both some, don’t worry.” He got up to serve them and set the bowls down on the counter. Hailey and Jay grabbed their soup and went to sit on the couch, still feeling tired from last nights events. 

Both of their phones were going off in Jay’s room. Unbeknownst to them, Kim was trying to get a hold of them, but they were both set on silent. Calling and texting, calling and texting. No answer from either of them. The text messages that popped up on Hailey’s phone read, “Hailey, please call me. Adam’s been in an accident. I’m with him at Med.”


	6. Car accident

A little break from Hailey and Jay to another favourite pairing of mine….Burzek! Needed this chapter to set up for the next. Hope you enjoy! ☺ 

Chapter 6

“That’s weird” Kim thought, as she paced around the emergency department waiting room area. Their phones both showed up at Jay’s apartment after she pinged them. Maybe Hailey got stuck there in the storm. She knew Jay wasn’t feeling well yesterday, and Hailey took him home to look after him. It would make sense that she would have stayed there with him, especially the way the roads were. But it wasn’t like them not to answer their phones. She wondered if there was something more going on, there’s been a lot of weird energy between them lately, you didn’t need to be a detective in order to pick up on that. All of it was just a bit complicated at the moment. For what it’s worth, she understood. Working in the same unit with someone who you have or had feelings for can be tricky. Part of her would always have feelings for Adam, and she was happy that he was happy with Hailey. But the way Jay looked at Hailey sometimes…it was so obvious to everyone but Hailey it seemed. Or maybe it wasn’t, but that wasn’t any of her business to sort out. She was here for Adam as a friend, she still cared deeply for him. That thought quickly got interrupted when she saw Dr. Rhodes come out into the waiting room. Kim had been waiting for a while now with no news on Adam. She wasn’t sure if anyone else even knew if he was here. Severide was actually the one who called Kim to let her know that Adam had been in an accident, Squad 3 responded to the scene, but didn’t know exactly what kind of shape he was in. All he could tell her was that another car lost control at an intersection and t-boned Adam’s car, likely hit a patch of ice, and that he was in and out of consciousness when they got there. She shuddered at the thought, but was relieved to finally be getting an update from Dr. Rhodes.

“How is he Dr. Rhodes?” She said worriedly.

“He’s okay Kim, he got lucky. His shoulder is pretty banged up, had to put it back into place. Some cuts and bruises, needed a few stitches above his eyebrow. Mild concussion. But nothing too serious, he’ll make a full recovery. Just needs some TLC.” He flashed her his signature grin. 

Relief washed over her face and she let out a sigh. “Thank goodness. Can I see him?”

“Of course, come with me. We’ll keep him here for another hour or so just to monitor the concussion, and make sure his pain level is okay. I had to give him something so we could pop his shoulder back in so he’s a bit loopy. But after that you can take him home.”

She wasn’t sure how much Connor knew about their situation, so she decided to just let that last comment slip by. 

They walked down to Adam’s room and entered quietly. He was sitting up in the bed, a sling keeping his injured shoulder tight to his body. He glanced over at them when he heard the curtain pull back.

“Oh, Adam.” Kim said softly as she immediately sat down at his bedside, giving him a once over. His face was already showing signs of bruising, and there was some left over caked blood where he needed the stitches. All things considered he didn’t look too bad, Kim was just relieved he was sitting up and alert.

“Hey Kim.” He smiled weakly, a little surprised, but glad to see her. 

“What happened?” She asked with a concerned look on her face.

“I’m not really sure to be completely honest, happened so fast. The roads were pretty bad, uhhh I think this car just blew the light, an accident though. It could have been worse.” He downplayed how much it scared him because he could see Kim was upset.

“I’m just glad you’re okay. Connor said you’ll make a full recovery, just have to take it easy for a while.”

“Thanks for coming by the way, I forgot I still have you listed as my emergency contact” he said sheepishly.

Kim smiled, he must not know that Severide had called her, not the hospital. But interesting to know that he still had her down as his emergency contact. Her heart swelled in her chest. 

“It’s alright, I would have come here anyways.” After their engagement ended, things had been messy between them for a bit. But regardless of that, Adam was so important to her and she was thankful to have him in her life.

They sat in silence for a minute before Dr. Rhodes chimed in, they almost forgot he was still standing there. 

“You feeling okay Adam? How’s the pain?”

Adam winced a bit as he moved in the bed. “I’ll be okay Doc, when can I get out of here.”

Connor smiled, “Not so fast. Need to watch you for another hour or so before I can discharge you.”

Adam rolled his eyes but didn’t object. His shoulder and head were throbbing. 

“What were you doing out in this weather anyways, word on the street is that Intelligence had a snow day today. I would have been taking full advantage of sleeping and binge watching TV all day” Connor laughed.

“I was going to head over to Jay’s. Hailey was there last night looking after him, he got really sick yesterday. I haven’t heard from her today so I wanted to make sure she… they were alright.” He looked at Kim, somewhat embarrassed. He still felt guilty how that whole situation with her and Hailey played out, he didn’t mean for her to find out that way. He owed her that much.

“Ahh yes, Will mentioned that he was worried about them last night too. Sounded like pneumonia. I’m sure if something was wrong we would have known by now.” Connor tried reassuring him, suddenly realized he had made a wrong assumption about Kim and Adam being together. Inter-intelligence relationships sounded complicated, although probably no different than the ones going on at Med right now, he chuckled to himself.

Kim glanced at Adam and felt sad for him, it was clear by the look on his face that he genuinely cared for Hailey, but also shared the same suspicions about her and Jay like the rest of them. Kim knew Adam like the back of her hand, he wears his heart on his sleeve and sometimes that gets him in trouble. 

“I tried calling and texting Hailey and Jay, but haven’t been able to get a hold of them. Their phones are dead I think, power could have gone out at Jay’s place. I saw something on the news about his area” she interjected with a quick white lie in hopes it would make Adam feel a little better about Hailey not being there. 

“Thanks Kim. I’m sure she’ll reach out when she can. I don’t want her to worry, she has enough on her plate with Jay.” 

Dr. Rhodes just smiled at the two of them and went to excuse himself. He felt like he was intruding on some sort of private moment. 

“I’ll give you guys some privacy, Adam just ring the call button if you need anything okay. Try to get some rest, we’ll work on getting you out of here shortly.”

Adam and Kim both nodded as Rhodes left the room and pulled the curtain back.

Adam’s eyes were starting to droop, the pain medicine starting to take control of his body. He could see that Kim was trying to ask him something but his mind was a little foggy at the moment. She eventually stopped talking and realized he wasn’t up for a chat.

“You can close your eyes it’s okay. Just rest. I’ll be here” she squeezed his hand and sat down in the chair next to his bed. 

The next hour flew by and Dr. Rhodes came back in to let them know Adam could go home.

“Now, I want you to take it easy alright Adam? Your shoulder will be sore for a while. I also want you to come back for a check-up in a week or so, and then we’ll talk physio and back to work stuff.” Dr. Rhodes said as he signed some paperwork and handed Adam a prescription for some pain killers. 

“Thanks man. I owe you a drink next time we’re at Molly’s”, Adam said with a grin.

“Oh and one more thing”, Connor looked directly at Kim for this too. “You have a mild concussion as well, so someone should be waking you up tonight okay? Just to make sure everything is all good.” 

“You got it” Kim told Connor. 

Kim helped Adam up from the hospital bed and wrapped his coat around his shoulders for him. 

“A gentleman’s escort” she grinned mischievously as she held out her arm for Adam to lean onto. 

“Oh nowwww you’re into that” he laughed as he reluctantly took her up on her offer of support, his body was starting to feel really sore, the effects of the crash setting in.

She brought him down to her car, helped him with the seatbelt and made her way back to his place.

Their car ride was mostly silent, she kept looking over at him to make sure his arm was okay. She noticed his face as she drove over the occasional pot hole and speed bump as he grimaced in pain.

“Sorry. You alright? I’m trying to go slow here.”

“Ya, ya I’m good. Just want to get home.”

“Did you want me to swing by Jay’s place?” Kim asked him cautiously.

He thought about it for a second, but ultimately decided not to say anything. He was a little hurt that Hailey wasn’t there at the hospital. In her defence, he wasn’t sure she even knew what had happened yet. If she did, he’s sure she would have come to Med. But, who knows what was going on at Jay’s, they could both be passed out for all he knew.

“No it’s okay, I’ll talk to her later. Not feeling up to that right now.” 

She decided not to push that conversation and instead came up with a better idea.

“How about I call Kev and the three of us can order pizza and have a night in together? Just like old times” she asked in an effort to cheer him up.

“You know, that’s exactly what I need. I appreciate this Kim, really. Thanks for being here today” he shot her a glance and gently squeezed her knee with his good arm. 

A simple reply, but to Kim said so much.


	7. Guilt

Chapter 7

The rest of the afternoon at Jay’s had flown by. Hailey came out on the winning end of a heated Scrabble game. Nothing like a good old fashioned game of Scrabble to get everyone’s blood boiling. 

“Sorry Will, can’t help it that I’m a better speller than you” she laughed, the older Halstead clearly bitter about the loss.

“Ya well you got lucky, I’m only running on a few hours of sleep here.”

“Excuses Will, excuses, nobody likes a sore loser”, Hailey said smugly. This caused Jay to burst out laughing, he was loving the sassy banter between his brother and his partner. 

“She has a point man”, Jay mocked Will, siding with his partner. 

“Next time Upton, next time.” Will got up to put the kettle on. The weather was still not letting up and he had to be back at the hospital for a shift in a few hours. 

“I’m going to go lie down for a bit guys, some of us actually have to work today” Will said with a grin on his face, taking his tea back to his room.

Hailey got up to grab the mugs Will set aside for her and Jay, noticing he was starting to doze off on the couch. 

“Why don’t you go lie down too Jay, you still don’t look very well.”

Jay gave her an eye roll, but reluctantly agreed. “I could use a nap I guess” he said through a yawn.

She followed him to his room and made sure he got settled, sipping his tea before going back to sleep. She looked at her phone sitting on his night stand and saw she had a few missed calls from Burgess, they both did actually. Her heart started beating quickly, sensing there was something wrong. She opened the earliest text from Kim and her heart sank.

“Hailey, please call me. Adam’s been in an accident. I’m with him at Med.”

Panic and worry setting in, all she could manage was, “Oh my God, Jay.”

He forced his brain to wake up, judging by the look on her face, Hailey just read something upsetting.

“What’s wrong Hailey?”

“Adam was in an accident today. Burgess was with him at Med. She’s been trying to get a hold of us all day.” She glanced at the time, it was nearly dinner. She sent this hours ago. 

Jay tried to calm Hailey down, although feeling nervous himself, “I’m sure he’s okay. If it was serious enough someone would have called Will from Med, especially since we weren’t answering.”

Hailey let out a sigh, Jay was right, but that didn’t make her feel any better about the situation. 

“I have to call her back. I hope he’s okay.”

“Me too.” Jay felt guilty about Hailey being here with him instead of with Adam, he really did hope he was okay.

Kim was sitting in Adam’s apartment waiting for Kev and their dinner to arrive. Adam had gone to lie down in his room for a while, she suspected he was feeling a little bit worse than he was letting on.

She hadn’t been to his place for such a long time. She looked around and smiled when she found a photo of the three of them on his bookshelf by his TV. Simpler times, she thought. 

She heard her phone go off and was relieved, and maybe a bit mad, when she saw Hailey’s name pop up on the screen. 

“Hey, before you freak out, Adam is okay”, she heard Hailey breathing heavily on the other end, stopping her before she went into a panic. 

Hailey let out a sigh of relief. “Kim I’m so sorry. Our phones were charging in the other room, we’ve been sleeping on and off all day, long night. What happened? How’s he doing?”

“Some lady lost control because of the ice, hit Adam in the intersection. Just a freak accident, it could have been worse. His shoulder was dislocated and he has a mild concussion. But Rhodes said he’s going to be okay.” 

There was an awkward silence on the other end of the phone. “I feel terrible I wasn’t there for him. He must hate me right now. Thank you for looking after him, I’m glad it was you that was there with him.”

Now it was Kim’s turn to feel a bit guilty, Hailey did sound genuinely upset, and blindsided by the news. Meaning their phones must really have been dead at some point, not ignoring her, she felt bad for thinking the worst.

“Of course. He was asking for you. But knows Jay has been really sick. How is he doing?” Kim could hear Jay coughing pretty hard in the background.

“Jay’s okay, a bit touch and go last night. His fever has been pretty high. Will checked him out and figures he has pneumonia.”

“Oh that’s not good. He sounds terrible, shouldn’t he be at the hospital for that?” Kim felt extra bad now knowing how sick Jay was, recognizing Hailey was in a tough position at the moment.

“He said it’s viral, whatever that means, doctor lingo” Hailey managed a laugh. “So there’s nothing that going to the hospital can do for him. Just have to let it run it’s course, keep an eye on him.”

“You know Hails, we could have had a double date at emerg today” Kim laughed on the other end, not realizing the implied meaning of her comment until after she said it. 

Hailey’s eye widened at that, all she could do was laugh, knowing that Kim probably didn’t mean for that to come out as it did. Her and Kim have never been particularly close, so she was thankful she was at least able to lighten the mood. 

“Ya no kidding, these guys are a mess”, trying to play it off, Jay giving her a sarcastic glance at that comment.

“Anyways, Kim, is Adam alright really? I’m going to swing by, if he’s up for it.”

Hailey couldn’t help but notice Jay looked a little disappointed by that.

“He’s lying down right now, he wasn’t feeling well when we first got back. I think the pain meds wore off pretty quickly. Kev is on his way over with deep dish from Lou’s, you’re welcome to join!” 

“You know the way to my heart” Hailey laughed, her stomach gurgled at the thought of her favourite pizza, she had barely eaten anything in the last 24 hours.

“I’m just going to make sure everything is okay here and I’ll come over alright? Tell Adam I’m coming” Hailey said nervously, knowing that those three had a tight knit friendship, she didn’t want to intrude.

“Sounds good Hailey, we’ll be here. See you soon.” Kim hung up the phone and went to open the door to Adam’s bedroom quietly to check on him.

Hailey set her phone down and glanced over at Jay, who was giving her a look that she couldn’t quite put her finger on. Worry? Disappointment? Sadness?

Jay spoke first. “Is Adam okay?” Looking genuinely concerned.  
Hailey nodded, “Ya, sounds like he got lucky. Burgess was with him the whole time. Just a little banged up, he’ll be sore for a while.”

“That’s good to hear” Jay half smiled. “You should go Hailey, I’m fine here really.”

There was a few seconds of silence before Hailey replied, seeing the look on Jay’s face, she knew he didn’t want her to leave, but considering the circumstances, knew she had to.

“Ya I’m going to head out. I feel bad that I didn’t hear about this until now.”

“Sorry”, Jay said quietly, avoiding eye contact with her, knowing she wasn’t with Adam because she was busy taking care of him. 

She realized that sounded bad, and that her words probably stung Jay. “No I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. I don’t regret being here with you. Just unfortunate timing, what are the odds you know?”

Jay smiled at her, “Ya, no of course. Don’t worry about it. Tell Adam I say hi.”

Hailey just nodded and quickly grabbed her things, suddenly feeling the awkward tension in the room. She took off his Blackhawks sweater before she left. “Thanks for letting me borrow this.”

“Anytime.”

“You sure you’re alright? Need anything before I go?” She asked quietly, noticing Jay’s eyes starting to close.

“Hmm? No I’m okay. I think I’m just going to go back to bed, pretty wiped.”

“Okay, Will’s still here for a bit. Call me if you need anything alright?” Hailey told him.

“Thanks Hailey, you’ve done enough, really. Go look after Adam, his turn tonight.” Jay said with a smile, although Hailey could tell it was a forced one. 

Hailey flashed him a smile and left his room, closing the door quietly behind her. 

Will heard Hailey grab her things and leave in a hurry. He was in the midst of getting ready for work and decided to go see what happened. He opened Jay’s door to find him tossing and turning.

“Hey you alright? Hailey left in a hurry.”

“It’s Ruzek, he got into a car accident today. He’s okay though. Hailey’s heading over there to check on him, he’s a little banged up.”

Will could tell his brother was disappointed that she left, although for good reason. 

“Oh I see. Glad to hear he’s alright. I’m going to be leaving for work here shortly are you going to be okay by yourself tonight? I can try and get my shift covered” Will said, trying to change the subject. Jay clearly did not want to talk about Adam and Hailey, or whatever it is that he had going on with Hailey.

Jay shook his head, “No it’s okay Will, you don’t have to do that. I think the worst has passed to be honest. Just need a good night sleep.” He made an effort to smile to show Will he was okay, truth be told he still felt terrible, but didn’t want to worry him. 

Will wasn’t sure how much he bought that, Jay was notorious for downplaying just about everything, especially when it came to him being hurt or sick. 

“Okay well if anything happens please call me. I’m serious Jay, pneumonia can be dangerous.”

“Yes, yes I know. You don’t have to baby me”, he smiled genuinely this time. 

Will smiled and rolled his eyes as well, “Talk to you later then, get some sleep”, as he shut the door and started to get ready to head back to the hospital. On the other side of the door, Jay let out a long sigh and closed his eyes, not really sure why he felt so empty.


	8. Tell Jay I say hey

Chapter 8

Across town, Kim and Kevin were chatting in the kitchen when Hailey knocked on the door. She looked like a combination of nervous and guilty, it was also evident how tired she was.

Kev opened it and casually said “What’s up baby girl, come on in.”

That seemed to relax Hailey, who smiled through tired eyes. “I’m okay, how are you guys?”

“We’re good in here. Adam’s still in bed.”

“Deep dish is in the oven as we speak” Kim poked her head out from the kitchen.

“Smells delicious, thanks for letting me crash your dinner. I haven’t eaten much today.”

“You know you’re welcome to hang anytime. How’s Halstead doing? Heard you guys had a rough night?” Kev asked, knowing full well the strange situation he was in the middle of tonight with Burgess, Upton, Ruzek and Halstead. 

“Not well to be honest, I’ve never seen him so sick. But hopefully the worst is over. He was a bit better when I left.” Hailey replied, not wanting to make this night about Jay, she was here for Adam.

“Ahh, poor guy. Flu season has been bad this year” Kim and Kev nodded in agreement. 

“I’m going to go check on Adam, be back in a minute guys” Hailey said as she walked down the hall towards his bedroom.

She turned the door knob slowly and crept into his room quietly. She was taken aback by his injuries, the swelling and bruising starting to set it. He was sleeping half sitting up in bed, his arm propped up on a pillow. She sat down on his bed, and softly kissed him on the forehead.

He reacted and began to stir but hadn’t quite opened his eyes yet, quietly muttering, “Kim?”

Hailey felt a pang of hurt by his response, thinking she was Kim. Part of her wasn’t that surprised though. They had such a history together, and the two of them, at work and outside of it, have always been so natural, even considering their circumstances. Tonight was a prime example of that. If they could make it work, still be in the same unit together, maybe there was hope for the situation she suddenly found herself deep in the middle of.

He opened his eyes and slowly realized it was Hailey at his bedside, not his former fiancé. 

“Hailey”, he smiled, recognizing the hurt on her face. “Sorry darlin, didn’t realize you were here”.

She decided not to make it a thing, tonight wasn’t really the right time for that impending conversation. “How are you feeling? I was worried about you. I’m so sorry I wasn’t there, I was sleeping when Kim was trying to get a hold of me.”

“It’s okay. I’m alright, little sore. My shoulder is throbbing”, he said as he tried to sit up, but immediately regretted it. 

“Ahh, it’s okay, easy.” Hailey gently put her hand over his good shoulder and eased him back into a comfortable position. 

“How’s Jay? I was coming over to his place this afternoon to check on you guys when…you know.” 

Hailey immediately felt herself getting emotional, he got into an accident and was hurt, all because she was too busy wrapped up with Jay to find a minute to call him back. 

“Oh Adam, I’m so sorry. Last night was a mess. I should have called you. Jay’s a bit better, but not out of the woods. We were up most of the night. Pneumonia.” She said sounding apologetic. 

“That’s rough. Glad you were there with him, I worry about Jay sometimes you know…he’s been off lately. He had the best nurse though, maybe I can get in on some of that now”, he gave her a cheeky wink and grin, which eased the guilt she was feeling a little bit.

It made it even harder that Adam was so caring towards Jay, she knew whatever happened was going to hurt both her and him a lot. He really was a good person, and a good friend to all of them. She smirked, “Of course.”

“Listen Hailey, about before, thinking you were Kim, sorry….”, he trailed off.

“Don’t even worry about it honestly, I’m glad Kim was here with you today” Hailey copied his sentiments, the two of them sharing a look that deep down had an unspoken level of understanding about their relationships with Kim and Jay, respectively. They had some talking to do once he was on the mend. 

In perfect timing, Kim popped her head in his room and whispered, “Hey guys, pizza’s ready.”

Adam and Hailey nodded and smiled at her, “Be right there.”  
Hailey reached over to help him out of bed. His muscles were tense and sore after being jolted around this afternoon. She was careful not to knock his shoulder. “Nice and easy Adam.” They slowly made their way to the kitchen where they were greeted by Kim and Kev.

“There he is” Kev smiled.

Adam attempted a smile back, but grimaced in pain instead, walking around wasn’t feeling too good right about now.

All three of them in unison immediately sprang into action to help him over to the couch. Kev took over for Hailey and helped walk Adam over to sit down. Kim made sure his arm and head were resting on some pillows, Hailey went to grab a few ice packs from his freezer.

“Thanks guys”, he said weakly, letting out a big exhale as his body relaxed into the couch. 

Hailey sat down on the couch next to him and gently held an ice pack up to the side of his face, where a solid black eye was forming. “How’s your head? And shoulder?”

“Sore”, was all he could manage, still with his eyes closed. “Could use some of those painkillers soon.”

“I know, but you have to eat something first, you’ll be sick if you take those on an empty stomach. And that will not feel good”, Hailey replied.

Kim and Kev brought all four plates of pizza over and set them on the coffee table so they could eat together.

“Here Adam”, Kim said as she brought a slice up for him to take a few bites, looking at Hailey for a bit of approval.

“Open up kiddo”, Hailey nodded and laughed as she watched Kim try to feed him, clearly struggling to do so. 

Adam eventually opened his eyes and laughed at the two of them attempting to get him to eat. “Wow you guys run a tight ship.”

He managed to eat half a slice before he was begging Kim to grab him some painkillers.

After those kicked in he was feeling more up to chatting with his company, looking around, thankful he had people in his life who cared about him. This was the first time Hailey had hung out with all of them, and he was hoping it wouldn’t be the last. 

The four of them sat and started a movie and ate deep dish, each taking turns switching out the ice packs sitting on his shoulder and face.

Kev and Kim looked over at one point and saw Hailey and Adam both passed out on the couch next to each other. She was clearly running on little to no sleep, having looked after both Jay and Adam in the last 24 hours. 

They let them both have a little nap and used the time to clean up Adam’s apartment. Not long after, Hailey woke up and realized she had fallen asleep, seeing Adam still passed out beside her.

“Sorry guys”, she whispered as she got up to help them clean dishes and the kitchen.

“No you go sit down too Upton, we got this” Kev said quietly.

Just then they heard a small yelp from Adam, clearly in pain. 

Hailey rushed over to him, “Hey you okay?” Putting a hand on his good shoulder.

He took a deep breath in and slowly let it out, “Ya, just rolled over on my shoulder by accident” he told her looking pale as a ghost.

Kim and Kev also came over to make sure he was alright. “Why don’t you head back to bed Ruz” Kev suggested, looking concerned for his friend. 

He nodded and pulled himself up off the couch, leaning on Kev as they walked back to his room.

That left Kim and Hailey in the living room, sharing a comfortable silence. Kim broke it first.

“Hailey, you should go home and sleep too. Voight is already down 2 people tomorrow, we don’t need you out either.” She said in a way not to make her feel like she wasn’t welcome here anymore, but more out of concern for her too.

Hailey smiled and understood what Kim was saying. She didn’t want to intrude on their night together either, knowing it was somewhat of a ritual between the three of them. Plus she was exhausted. 

Without having to ask, Kim added “Kev and I are staying here tonight, so Adam won’t be alone. Someone has to wake him up with the concussion anyways, so we’ll take shifts.”

“Thanks Kim, I know he’s in good hands tonight” giving Kim a reassuring look. She glanced at her phone, just after 8 o’clock. I’m going to go say good night to him and Kev”, she said through a yawn.

She poked her head into Adam’s room, just as he was getting comfortable in bed again.

Kev looked up and excused himself to give them some privacy. 

“I’m going to head out, a long hot shower and my bed are calling my name” Hailey said.

Adam smiled, “I’m glad you came. So much for a relaxing snow day huh?”

“Mhmm, no such thing as a quiet day off” Hailey said as she gently sat down next to him. “Kim and Kev are going to stay here with you, to make sure you’re okay” she squeezed his hand.

“Probably for the best, I don’t think I’m going to be much fun tonight” he said motioning down to his shoulder.

“I’m only a phone call away, okay? Get some rest.” She gave him a soft kiss, careful to avoid the bruises. 

She was almost out of the room when she heard him say, “Tell Jay I say hey.” She paused before she looked back, nervous she would find an angry, jealous, or hurt look on his face, or all of the above, but instead he looked….content. They made eye contact for a split second and shared a nod of understanding.

Hailey made the quick drive home from Adam’s to her place, thankful they were only ten minutes apart. Her eyes were getting heavy and it was barely 8:30. She set her bags down as soon as she got in the door and headed straight for the shower. She stayed in there for way longer than normal, letting the hot water and steam melt the stress of the day away, her mind dwelling on what Adam said to her, Tell Jay I say hey. Did that mean he assumed she was going back there tonight? Or in general since he was obviously going to be off for a while. She was over-thinking and she knew it, but part of her did want to go back to Jay’s tonight. To check on him, but mostly just to spend time with him. As stressful as the last 24 hours had been, hanging out with Jay was usually how she relieved stress, so she felt conflicted. She checked her phone when she got out of the shower and didn’t see any messages from him, which is a good thing I suppose. She tried calling him but no answer, he always picks up even if he’s half asleep. She had a decision to make.

Come on Hailey, go back to Jay’s, you know you want to, he needs you, her heart was telling her.

But no, Hailey, just stay here and let Jay rest on his own tonight, he probably wants to be alone, you’re tired, you have to work tomorrow, her body was screaming at her. 

In the end it was her heart that won out.


	9. Best sleep I've had in a long time

Chapter 9

Jay’s heart was pounding so loud in his chest that he didn’t even hear his front door turn open. He still had this fever, and with that, he couldn’t seem to shake the nightmares. He looked over at his alarm clock, it was only 10 pm? How was he going to get through this night. He could feel his chest tightening and his breathing getting more and more rapid. He pulled himself to a seated position, with his back against his headboard, hugging his knees tight to his chest, doing everything in his power to fight off this panic attack. He had his forehead rested on the top of his knees, trying to take slow deep breaths, the constant coughing making this a whole lot more challenging.

He wasn’t sure how long he had been curled in a ball when he heard her voice in the back of his mind. 

“Jay….Jay….”

He had to be imagining it, it was late, there was no way Hailey was back here. She was with Adam tonight. But then he felt one of her hands on his back and the other on top of his hands that were clutching his head as she crouched down in front of him. 

“Jay, take a deep breath, nice and slow. Breathe with me”….in…..she took a deep breath…and out, a long slow exhale.

They did this for several minutes, Jay still couldn’t bring himself to lift his head. All the while, Hailey was talking him through this panic attack, her voice was calm and gentle, but firm and reassuring.

“You’re safe Jay. I’m right here. We’ll get through this together” she repeatedly told him as she rubbed his back, hoping her touch would make him come back to reality. 

She wasn’t sure what she would walk in to find, but she certainly did not expect to find him like this. Her heart ached, he looked so….broken. This was not the tough exterior version of Jay Halstead she was used to seeing. Instead, he was crumpled in her arms shaking with anxiety and fear. Whatever walls he had up with her before, instantly fell down. 

His knuckles were white from gripping the sides of his bed sheets in an attempt to ground himself, anything to trick his mind into believing that he was in his apartment in Chicago, not the desert in Afghanistan. 

Unsure how much time had passed by since she got here, he was finally able to get his breathing under control. His chest felt less heavy, and was hopeful that the attack had passed. He lifted his head slowly to find her blue eyes staring back at him, worried.   
“Hailey?” He said in somewhat of a questioning tone. 

It was the first word he said since she got here, with an unspoken “You came back” added at the end. 

“Hey” she said softly, taking him all in, handing him the glass of water on his nightstand. His eyes were red and watery, it looked like he had been crying all night.

She was not expecting what came next, not at all. 

He looked at her and just burst into tears. She hesitated for a second, not sure how she should handle this. He was vulnerable right now, really vulnerable. She didn’t want to say or do the wrong thing, he was finally letting her all the way in, showing her an enormous amount of trust. 

As with most aspects of their partnership, she thought actions spoke louder than words. She crawled into bed next to him and pulled him into a tight protective hug, remembering his nightmare advice from last night. He resisted at first, purely off instinct, but eventually allowed his body to relax into hers. She held and rocked him gently as he coughed and cried, the side of his face resting against her chest.

His pain became her pain in this moment. Once he started he couldn’t hold back. He cried for all the friends that he lost overseas and in Chicago, all the war memories that haunted him, Erin leaving, his mom not being here, Al, his dad dying. He couldn’t see her, but Hailey had tears streaming down her face too. “It’s okay Jay, it’s okay, let it all out.”

“Hailey, I’m damaged goods. I’m better off alone. You don’t have to be here.”

Now it was her turn to get emotional, she felt a sob choke up in the back of her throat.

“You always have me Jay, always”, she whispered as she squeezed him tighter against her, devastated that this is what he thinks of himself. A reminder that he was still holding onto these thoughts from his time overseas. She also felt some guilt of her own creep in…was she not paying close enough attention to him? How long had he been slipping again? The nightmares she witnessed the other night seemed mild in comparison to this. 

They laid together in silence and drifted off to sleep. Any doubts or hesitations she had about coming back here tonight were completely washed away. This was exactly where she needed to be. 

3:30 am. 

Hailey jolted herself awake, stuck in a weird dream of her own. She took in her surroundings, reminding herself she was in Jay’s bed. She looked down at him, still in the same position they were when they fell asleep. He looked peaceful this time. She gently brushed back his hair and felt his forehead to check his fever. Not as warm, she thought. She didn’t want to risk moving and waking him up. He had been pretty sick for the last 48 hours, so maybe his fever was finally breaking. She decided to let him be, he looked like he was actually resting for the first time in a long time. She set an alarm so she could make it to work on time and soon after her eyes shut for the rest of the night.

Her sleep was solid, but short lived as she heard her phone alarm going off at 7:30. The noise woke Jay up as well. She definitely didn’t come back here last night with the intention of staying the night in his bed, again, but here they were. She figured she would check on him, make sure he was feeling okay, and sleep in Will’s bed. Maybe for her own selfish reasons she just wanted to spend time with him. What ended up happening was so far from what she would have imagined, part of her wasn’t sure if she should even bring it up, in fear he may push her away or downplay this entirely. Clearly Jay is still struggling. After last year, she knew he got help and talked to a therapist, and seemed to get a better handle on himself. Maybe he just hides things well, or a more realistic thought is that this has and always will be an ongoing battle to some degree. Sometimes it was easy to forget just how much he had been through, what he’s seen. Here and in the army. Some of his friends didn’t handle coming home well at all. Maybe Jay was one of the lucky ones, if you could really call this lucky. Her thoughts were interrupted when Jay peeled himself off of her and sat up in bed. 

“Hailey….I….this…”, he seemed at a loss for words as he buried his head in his hands.

“Jay….”, she started with sincerity. 

“I don’t know what to say. I’m sorry that you had to deal with that last night” he looked mortified, which made Hailey feel even worse.

“Jay. Look at me” she said as she attempted to pull his hands away from his face so that they were making eye contact with one another.

“Don’t. There’s no need to apologize, not for this. I wish you told me sooner. I would have been over here right away. I….I had no idea, about any of this”, she said with empathy.

He gave her a half smile, “Not as often anymore, what you’re thinking”, he started as if he was reading her mind, that was going to be her next question. “Like I said before, it’s usually just when I’m sick or really stressed now. But when this does happen…”, he looked up at her and took a deep breath. “I just have no control. And it’s hard. And scary. That’s the truth. But it’s something I have to deal with, it’s been a part of my life for a long time now. If you knew me ten years ago, believe me, this, last night, is huge progress” he added quietly. 

She was stunned, she didn’t say anything, just listened. Let him talk it out. 

“I used to think there was something wrong with me, that I deserved to feel this way because of all the bad things I did while I was over there. All the innocent people Hailey…the women and children…I can never take that back. This is the price I have to pay for it.” His head was hung the whole time he was talking, his voice barely above a whisper.

Her mind was racing with a million different thoughts. How was she supposed to convince him that none of this was his fault? Seeing the aftermath of that scared her in ways she didn’t realize before last night. What she saw last night, something he rationalized as a normal part of his life after coming home, made everything very real, put things into perspective for her. She didn’t know if she could find the words. 

She stopped him and grabbed his hand. “Jay there’s nothing wrong with you. What you went through over there and what you carry because of it, is real. What you sacrificed…for your country, for your friends and family, for me…., you shouldn’t have to suffer like this, it’s okay to ask for help. No one will think any less of you for it.”

“I don’t want anyone else to find out Hailey. How can I be a cop with occasional PTSD? I don’t want anyone in the unit to think they can’t trust me”, he said with hurt in his voice.

She could see this thought had been weighing heavily on him for a long time. 

“Look how far you’ve come. At the life you’ve built, you’re doing great. It’s only going to get better from here.”

“It hasn’t always been great. Ask Will that. When I came back and for a while after…I was a total nightmare. No pun intended”, he flashed a small smirk. “He was scared of me, I was scared of myself. I don’t want you to be scared of me too now”, he let out a sigh. 

“Jay, this does not define you. You can always talk to me, I will always be in your corner. This doesn’t scare me, not at all”, she rubbed his hand to reassure him.

He glanced up and finished with, “I always get stuck on this little girl, a bullet went through a wall in this house we raided once…. Collateral damage. She had no chance…And uhh, last year, when I shot that girl by accident at the daycare center…you remember?” He looked at her and she nodded slowly. “That’s what set all of last year off. Everything with Luis, and Camilla and how I treated you and everyone else. I’ve learned to control a lot of the triggers, but sometimes, it just gets to be too much, like I’m drowning again. And if it wasn’t for you….pulling me out of it…I don’t know where I’d be right now. You have no idea what you’ve done for me Hailey. I can never repay you. So thank you.” He was looking straight at her now, with a look that made her feel that he was staring right into her soul.   
Hailey was taken aback by his admission and his honesty, still in disbelief by the gravity of the conversation they were having. 

“No Jay, thank you. For this. For everything. For letting me in”, was all she could manage. Somehow that didn’t say enough but she knew he got it. She knew he trusted her before, but this was different now. 

Their hands and eyes were locked together, lingering. “Plus, that was the best sleep I’ve had in a really long time” he told her, looking somewhat embarrassed, but also cheeky, to admit that it was with her.

His admission was not lost on Hailey, who was trying to keep her dimples from showing. 

“You feel better now? You look a lot better”, she said as she reached over to touch his forehead, feeling the need to change the subject, this heart to heart got a little too heavy for 7:30 in the morning.

“Ya I do actually, thanks”, he smiled at her.

“Your fever’s finally gone”, she said with relief. She looked over at his alarm clock, “Ugh, and I have to get ready for work now…”, not wanting this conversation to end.

He nodded and got up from his bed, “I’ll go put on some coffee.”

“Side note, now you know why I don’t have many women sleep over” he joked halfway out the door, trying to break the tension in the room.

That caused Hailey to burst out in laughter. “Really, I thought that was just your lack of game?”

He shook his head and smiled as he left the room to give her some privacy to get ready for the day. 

Hailey came out into the kitchen as put together as she possibly could manage. She was greeted by the smell of fresh coffee and also…an omelette, and some fruit? That looked amazing. Interesting. 

“You’re not the only one who can cook you know” he said with his back turned and a smile she couldn’t see, sensing her surprise and presence in the kitchen.

She grinned, “Wow I am impressed, what a spread. Thanks Jay. But you didn’t have to make me breakfast.” He was on the mend but still not 100 percent.

“It’s the least I could do Hailey, really. Plus breakfast is kind of your love language so….figured this would win me back some brownie points.”  
“Very true”, she silently laughed at his “love language” comments. No matter how angry or upset or stressed she was about anything in life, “Do you want to go out for breakfast” or “Here’s a bagel and a coffee”, seemed to fix most things. She loved that he picked up on the little things about her. 

They sat at the island and ate together before she had to leave for the station. 

“How’s Adam by the way, sorry I didn’t even ask” he said sheepishly.

“That’s okay, you had a lot going on. Adam’s alright, was in a lot of pain last night, pretty banged up, but he should be feeling better in a few days. Kim and Kevin stayed with him last night”, she attempted to offer up a reason as to why she was here not there.

“That’s good, glad he’s alright. Umm by the way, why did you come back here last night? I figured you would be staying with Adam.”

She glanced over at him, feeling his eyes fixated on her. “I don’t know really. I just had a feeling, that I needed to come back here to check up on you.”

“Partner brain.”

“Exactly” she chuckled. “I’m glad I did though.”

“Me too” he smiled down at his coffee mug and gently squeezed her shoulder, feeling like a huge weight had been lifted off his shoulders. If Hailey stuck by him now, through everything she just saw and heard, he knew that she was the one. 

Hailey was his person, part of him knew that the moment they met. There was something about her, something special, that he never felt with Erin. He loved Erin of course, but she also had her own life problems to deal with. The two of them loved each other, but did not grow together, and it took him too long to come to that conclusion. Hailey made him want to open up more than he ever had with anyone else, be a better partner, friend. She drew him in, and on some level he knew she felt the same way. 

She left for work shortly after, making him promise to call if anything was wrong, for real this time.

“Hailey I’m fine. I’m feeling much better, honest. I’ll probably just watch movies all day. Will is home tonight.”

“Jealous” she smirked. “Okay. I’ll talk to you later. You’re lucky Voight gave you the rest of the week off.”

“I know right. Okay, sounds good, thanks. Have fun at work!” She rolled her eyes at him and closed the door behind her.

Although there was nothing romantic about their night together, there was something so intimate about what they just shared, what he just shared with her. It was almost better than the thoughts she had of them being physically together. This explained everything, why he keeps everyone at arms length, why he almost came unravelled a few months back on the Jake Miller case, why he always takes an uber home after a night of drinking at her place and never crashes on the couch…She felt like she finally understood him, and for the first time, she saw the real Jay Halstead. It left her wanting more.

She grabbed her bags and headed down towards her car, still in a bit of shock of what just happened. How was she supposed to just carry on with her day and go to work after that? What a night that was. What a week really. 

And it was only Wednesday!


	10. What an honour it is to be your Jay today

Chapter 10

Hailey pulled up to work and made her way into the station, greeted by Trudy at the front desk.

“Morning Detective, don’t you look like a ball of sunshine today”, she said in her normal sarcastic humour. 

“You too Sarge”, Hailey smiled.

“Hey listen, I heard about boy wonder, how’s he doing?”, she asked referring to Adam.

“He’s okay, sore and shaken up. But he should be feeling better in a few days”, Hailey nodded and smiled reassuring her.

“Good. And Halstead is out sick too?”

“Ya, he’s also in rough shape. One of those weeks I guess.”

“Mhmm that’s why you look so tired”, Trudy pointed out the obvious.

Hailey raised an eyebrow and gave her a questioning look. 

“Look Upton, I know you and Jay think you’re flying under the radar here, but if I was a betting woman, I would say that you traded in your vest for a nurse’s uniform on your snow day that’s all”, she gave her signature devilish grin.

Hailey didn’t know how to respond to that, all she could do was shake her head and smile. “Ya I guess you could say it was something like that. See you later Sarge”, she tapped the desk and made her way up to Intelligence. Great even Platt knows.

Intelligence was looking a little bare this morning, with Adam and Jay out. Everyone turned to her when they saw her come up the stairs, she was anticipating some questions. 

She saw Kim and Kevin first, and made her way over to ask about Adam.

“Morning guys. How’s Adam doing?”

“Morning Hails”, Kim started first. “He’s alright actually. Little groggy, had a headache last night but seemed better this morning. His shoulder is pretty sore but what can you do right.”   
“That’s good to hear. I was thinking about him last night”, small white lie, she thought, but they didn’t need to know that. As far as they know she went home and had an early night.

In reality, Adam was the last thing she was thinking about last night, even though she hated to admit that. 

“He was asking about you too, wanted to make sure you made it home okay” Kevin added.

“Oh ya, I was good. Had a nice hot shower, quiet night” she smiled.

“And Jay?” Kim asked concerned. “He sounded so horrible on the phone”.

Hailey’s eyes lit up at the mention of Jay. “He’s doing much better today, his fever is gone at least”. Kim and Kevin exchanged curious side glances at each other.

“I called him this morning”, Hailey added, trying to cover up the fact that she had him cradled in her arms all night.

They seemed to buy that, and even if they didn’t, they never questioned her further.

“That’s good to hear, glad he’s on the mend”, Kevin said. 

Their conversation was interrupted by Voight who came out of his office to talk about the plans for the day. 

“Okay, morning everyone. As you can see, we are down a few members today. Adam is doing well after his accident yesterday, but he will be off for a little bit while rehabbing his shoulder. Jay is out sick with a mild case of pneumonia, I gave him the rest of the week off. Hopefully he’ll be back by Monday”, he looked around the room, paying extra close attention to Hailey’s reaction to all of this, but she didn’t bite.

Voight rattled off the pairings for the day, and left Hailey for last. Kim and Kevin were paired off and Voight and Antonio had some business to attend to. That left Hailey as the odd one out. She looked around and saw them all giggling.

“Upton”, he smiled. “Since everyone is a little mixed up today, I have a special treat for you. Today you’ll be helping Platt out with paperwork and all exciting things at the front desk.”

Hailey laughed, “You guys already had this planned out before I got here huh”.

“Guilty”, Kim spoke up. “I love Platt to death, but I’m not sure our friendship would survive a full day of file sorting and answering phone calls together. That woman loves her organizing.” They all nodded in agreement. 

“Short straw, ya, ya I get it”, Hailey smiled, but secretly she was glad she was guaranteed to be inside all day, it was way too cold to be in and out of a squad car.

Hailey took her time at her desk writing up some case file notes and enjoying another coffee in the peace and quiet before she made her way downstairs.

“Hailey Upton, what an honour it is to be your Jay today”, Platt said with a grin on her face as she spotted Hailey coming down the stairs.

“That’s Detective to you, Sarge”, she fired back mischievously. “Happy to be at your service. Can’t wait to see what kind of calls we intercept and crime we fight from behind the front desk in the great city of Chicago today.”

“Okay now you’re just being rude”, Platt looked at her seriously, then immediately let out a laugh that she couldn’t contain.

Hailey couldn’t help but laugh either, she forgot how good it felt to let out a belly laugh. This week had been heavy, and draining. It felt good to let some of that stress out. 

“But all jokes aside, I am here to help you out, wherever you need it”, Hailey added.

“You know, I usually consider myself a one woman show, but today, the chance to get some more time in with a badass gal like yourself? How could I pass that up. Imagine all the fun girl talks we’re going to have, I might even let you braid my hair”, Platt said enthusiastically.

Hailey smiled and rolled her eyes. “Hand over the schedule will ya, I need to see when my last oil change was. Today might be a good day to take my car in to the shop”. 

“Hmm, looks like you could be due for one soon here, let me check….Upton, Upton”, as Platt flipped through the pages. “Yep, time for one. I’ll phone down and let Roger know.”

“Thanks”, Hailey said as she took her key off her keychain and slid it across the desk.

The rest of the morning went surprisingly quick. Hailey was shocked at how many calls the front desk did actually receive. Most of them weren’t important, just regular civilians phoning in for things, maintenance requests, scheduling changes, that sort of thing. But Hailey was fascinated by Platt’s multi-tasking. It really was like watching a one woman show, Platt was such a force. She was thankful for her, in more ways than one. 

“Hey, let’s say we break out of here and grab some lunch. Maybe make a quick pit stop at Ruzek’s, I wouldn’t mind checking in on him”, Trudy interrupted Hailey’s train of thought.  
“You don’t have to ask me twice, I’m starving! I’ve gotten used to Jay’s weird eating schedule….the guy eats lunch at like 11 am …latest…”, Hailey laughed as she checked her watch and realized it was almost 1. 

Platt chuckled and noticed that when she brought up Adam, Hailey defaulted to talking about Jay. 

“We could go check on Jay if you want too”, she said, fishing.

Hailey’s cheeks turned a shade a red that Platt wasn’t used to seeing, and she replied, “That’s okay, I talked to him this morning, he’s fine.”

“You sure? I’ve known Jay for a long time now. He’s been here what six, seven years? I think he’s called in sick maybe twice in that time”, Platt pushing a little harder now.

Hailey clued in to what she was doing and tried to play it off the best she could.

“I know, I’ve never seen him this sick before either. But honestly, he was a lot better today than he was the last few days. He just needs some rest. We hardly slept at all Monday”, her face deepened to a shade of crimson the second the words left her mouth, realizing how she had just incriminated herself. 

Platt raised her eyebrows, but seeing Hailey’s embarrassment, decided that she had enough fun with that for the day. 

“It’s good that you care Hailey, really, he needs someone that does in his life”, Platt hinted sincerely at what she figured Upton already knew about him. 

Hailey looked up and nodded at her intensely as she bit the side of her lip, and changed the subject the second she saw an opening. 

“I bet if we bring Adam a Portillo’s hotdog and a milkshake that would really make his day”, Hailey said with a smile. 

“Girl, you read my mind. Let’s go, you’re driving”, Platt said as she grabbed her coat from her chair and they made their way down to the parking lot.

“Crap, forgot your car was out of commission, I’ll go back and grab my keys” Platt said as they were standing out in the cold.

Hailey thought about her next words carefully.

“We can just take Jay’s truck. I drove him on Monday so it’s still sitting over there, it needed some work over the weekend. I have a key”, she said smirking, inviting Platt to make a joke. 

“He lets you drive that thing?” She said bewildered. 

They both laughed, “Only when it’s absolutely necessary. I think needing a hotdog qualifies as an emergency wouldn’t you say Sarge?” Hailey replied.

“Upton I’m going to let you in on a little secret. In all my years of service and general life experiences, there’s one thing I know for sure. Never underestimate the power of an emergency hotdog. Halstead will definitely understand”, Platt genuinely laughed this time.

They hopped in his truck and let it run for a while to warm up, these last few days brought quite a bite of snow. Luckily he had parked under a covered area of the lot, Hailey was silently thanking him for that so she didn’t have to scrape. While they were waiting, she was absentmindedly looking around, not as messy as it usually is in here, she noted. A small sparkle caught her eye in his cup holder.

“I have been looking for this EVERYWHERE over the last week”, she said out loud excitedly, shaking her head in disbelief.

Platt looked over curious to see what the item was in the cup holder that Hailey was so happy about. 

“It’s my bracelet, my mom gave this to me. I thought it popped off my wrist somewhere and it was gone forever. In here the whole time”, she said relieved and quickly pocketed it. He must have known it was in here though and forgot to tell her, she thought. His mind was in other places these last few days. 

“It’s been right under your nose this whole time Detective”, Platt said mockingly, the hidden meaning of that statement not lost on Hailey. 

Hailey just smiled and shook her head, made sure to put the bracelet in her coat pocket, and to thank Jay later for keeping it safe for her. 

They made their way over to Adam’s place and he smiled when he opened the door, recognizing the smell coming from their takeout bags. 

“Well, well, well ladies what do we have here. A house call?”

Hailey gave him a quick kiss in the doorway as she greeted him, which seemed to surprise Platt. Not in the she didn’t know we were dating way, but more of the public display of affection, way. 

“You okay kid?” Trudy asked as she gave him a soft hug, genuinely concerned.

He smiled, “I’m okay Sarge. Little sore, but I’ll be as good as new before you know it”.  
Hailey thought she saw a bit of emotion creep up on Platt as she watched her take in his injuries once they had sat down on the couch. His face was showing the bruising a lot more today than yesterday and his shoulder was clearly bothering him still.

“You look a lot better than last night”, Hailey offered, in hopes it would reassure Platt.

“Ya I feel much better, less groggy. My body is still pretty sore, but that’s going away slowly too”, he replied.

“Good I’m glad. Do you need anything? Maybe some ice for your face…or shoulder?” Hailey said as she went to get up from the couch.

“Yes please, I haven’t been icing it much this morning”, he replied. 

Hailey came back and set the icepack where he pointed to on his shoulder, his face relaxing a bit as she did so. 

“That feels a lot better, thank you”, he said. 

The three of them ate their lunch, well more like inhaled and caught up with each other before Hailey and Platt had to head back to the station. 

“How’s Jay by the way, feeling better?” Adam asked. 

“Ya he’s doing much better now too”, Hailey tried to stay casual about it.

“Well good, because if he wasn’t sick before, he’ll definitely be sick now knowing that you’ve been driving his truck”, Adam couldn’t help himself and burst out laughing, the girls joined him as well.

“Oh shut up”, Hailey said jokingly as she rolled her eyes and gave his good shoulder a soft push, happy that he was back to his old funny self.

They said their good-byes, Platt lingering telling Adam he could call her if he needed anything, even in the middle of the night.

“Thanks Sarge, I’ll be okay really, I’ve had lots of visitors checking on me”, he told her.

Hailey and Platt got into their car, realizing they had taken advantage of their hour lunch by just a little, but it was okay it was a slow day.

“So you and boy wonder huh”, she said quietly as they were driving along, Hailey feeling the judgment and curiosity in her voice.

Hailey glanced over and smiled, “Ya for a while now.”

“Oh I know”, Platt said.

Now it was Hailey who gave a curious look. 

Platt explained. “I notice everything Detective. Plus Burgess and I are better friends than we let on.” 

“Copy that”, she nodded. 

“It’s not like that. Kim is happy for you two, really. She’s been seeing someone else for a while now. Nothing serious, but you know. Things didn’t happen there and that’s okay”, Platt added, sensing Hailey’s apprehension to talk to her about this. 

“And listen. For what it’s worth. Adam is a great guy. I’ve always been team Burzek myself if I’m being honest. But if that’s what makes you happy then I am all for it!”

Hailey didn’t know how to respond to that one, she was at one point team Burzek too if she was being completely honest with herself. 

“It kind of just happened, we were both not expecting anything serious to come of it. Adam’s great…”, Hailey tried to clarify.

“But he’s not Jay?” Platt filled in the blank for her.

Hailey was taken aback by her boldness, not by the statement itself.

She shrugged and glanced at Platt, who could tell she knew exactly what button she had just pushed. 

“Jay’s my partner, of course I care about him. I just think we’re better off as friends. Dating your partner can get messy, we’ve both been there done that. Why ruin a good thing you know?” She said guardedly.

“Upton, truth time. Another secret, just me and you. The two of you aren’t fooling anyone. The way that boy looks at you…I’ll tell ya, if Randall ever looked at me that way.... She gave Hailey a knowing stare. It’s really just a matter of time, I think we both can agree on that right?”

Hailey stayed silent, but continued listening to what Trudy had to say.

“Just promise me you’ll let Adam down easy okay. Will it be hard, yes. But of all people, he will understand if you have feelings for your partner. It will be better off in the long run to be honest with each other, for all four of you.”

“All four of us?” Hailey asked.  
“You, Jay, Adam and Burgess. I know this week has been a strange set of circumstances with the weather and the two of them both going down at the same time, all of that. But look how the night turned out. Kim stayed with Adam and you stayed with Jay. 

“Not last night…”, Hailey trailed off.

“Save it Detective. We both know you went back there. And that’s totally okay. Jay needed you, and you gravitated there. Kim naturally gravitates to Adam. It is what it is and I think you both know that”.

Platt’s honesty was making this conversation a bit awkward, but Hailey knew she meant well by it, and frankly, it was something she needed to hear. After all, she did look up to Trudy. She was the reason she became a cop in the first place, and she really did value her opinion. 

“What am I supposed to do now though…I don’t want to hurt Adam…”, Hailey asked quietly. For the first time today, letting her guard down a bit. 

“You wanna know what I really think? I think Jay getting shot scared the life out of you and made you realize how much you really care about him. And I think Adam is dealing with a lot still from losing Al. He would never admit it, but Al’s passing really hit hard for him, they were very close. I think you both came together wanting to fill a void you each had in your life, or to distract yourselves from the grief. That’s not to say there’s anything wrong with that, I’m just not sure either of you wanted this to be a long term deal. I think you’re both great people, but I think the quicker you admit to yourself that this isn’t what you truly want, the better”, Platt laid it all out on the table for her.

Hailey’s mouth had dropped open a bit, shocked at what she just heard, although most of it true, and she took her eyes off the road for a split second to look over at Platt.

“You’re good you know that”, she said with a smirk. 

“Maybe I could get my Detective’s badge after all. Plus I do watch a lot of Dr. Phil”, Platt replied sarcastically, with a smirk. “But on a serious note, my advice to you is to follow your heart. You’re all adults, and will figure it out”.

Hailey gripped the steering wheel and nodded her head in thanks, the rest of the ride back to the station was spent in silence. This was the heart to heart she didn’t know that she needed today. 

The rest of the afternoon went by in a flash, Hailey actually enjoyed the change of pace for the day, paperwork wasn’t all that bad. She said good night to Platt and headed back to her place, craving the normalcy of her own bed and a glass of wine. She got settled in, had a bite to eat and turned on the TV to relax before bed, thinking a lot about her conversation with Platt in Jay’s truck today. 

Hailey’s phone buzzed on her coffee table and she chuckled when she opened a text from Jay. “My nurse is not as cute tonight”, with a selfie of a smiling Jay and a passed out on the couch with his mouth half opened Will attached. 

“Glad to see you smiling”, she wrote back. 

“Feeling a lot better, plus I’ll have my whole bed back tonight, no blanket stealers sleeping in it with me”, he replied cheekily. 

“I’ll be enjoying my sleep without someone snoring in my ear… and for the record, I can’t help it that you had a 102 degree fever, you didn’t need them!”, she laughed to herself and sent a laughing emoji to him. 

“Ya, ya, I guess that’s a valid point. I’m heading to bed though, night Hailey, get some sleep okay”. 

“You too, night Jay. Talk to you tomorrow”, she set her phone down and made her way up to her room to turn in for the night. Admittedly, it felt a little strange to be going to bed without Jay, the last two nights they were practically glued at the hip, or hands, rather.

A quiet night by herself is exactly what Hailey needed. She had the feeling the rest of this week was going to drag on, and her eyes shut as soon as her head hit the pillow.


	11. The Favourite Game

Chapter 11

Hailey woke the next morning groggy and tired. The last few days were catching up to her for sure. She made her way down to her kitchen for some breakfast and an extra large coffee. Chicago was still colder than Antarctica and it made her want to stay in bed all day, but duty calls.

By the time she got to the station, the team had already gone out on various assignments. Just her and Voight were up in the bullpen. 

“Hailey, come in my office for a minute would ya”, he yelled from his desk.

“What’s up Sarge”, she asked as she hung in the doorframe. 

“Sit down”, his tone made her nervous.

“Everything okay?”, she asked him slowly.

“You tell me”, he replied.

“I’m not following…”

“Hailey, I know this week has been a lot, between Ruzek and Halstead, the weather, I just want to make sure you’re alright. That you’re taking care of yourself too”.

His answer surprised her, she was expecting a lecture of some sort.

“Oh, um yeah, I’m okay. Thanks for asking”, she stuttered.

“Alright good. I’m giving you tomorrow off. It’s been a slow week here, and it looks like you could use a day to relax. You know, and do whatever you need to do”, he smirked.

She couldn’t help but smile back, “Thanks Sarge. Ya a quiet day to myself, she emphasized, as in no I will not be spending it entirely with Adam and/or Jay, is exactly what I need.”

“Okay then. And hey listen, I just got a call from Boden. He wants someone to head over there, apparently 51 got a call this morning and Kidd saw something suspicious, child endangerment related. That’s all I know. Why don’t you go check it out.”

“Copy that, I’ll drop by there in a few minutes”, she left his office and went down to her car to head over to the firehouse.

When she pulled up, she noticed Stella and Kelly on the apparatus floor together. 

“Upton, hey!” Stella called out.

“Hey guys, Voight said there was something you saw on a call this morning?”

“Um ya”, Stella started and looked over to Kelly who joined the conversation.

The two of them explained the situation to her and took her over to the apartment building to have a look. Unfortunately, the fire had damaged most of the unit and any evidence that could have been there. Hailey promised to look into it and touch base with them later on. 

She spent most of the day looking into the tenant Stella and Kelly told her about, and with a little help from them, ended up uncovering a very sinister situation going on. After all was said and done and she arrested the guy at his house that night, she joked that she could have used their help today. They were down a few members in Intelligence after all!

Hailey met up with Stella and Kelly later on at Molly’s, feeling like she owed them a few drinks for their work today. What a relief to get that man off the streets, and no longer able to harm children.

“Where’s Halstead tonight Hailey?” Kelly asked her as she sat down next to him at the bar. 

“He’s off sick unfortunately, or else I’m sure he would be taking advantage of drinks on me tonight too”, Hailey smirked.

“Oh poor thing, but better for your wallet”, Stella replied.

“Exactly”, she cheers’ed Kelly and Stella and excused herself to make her way over to a table of cops she knew.

“You think there’s something going on with her and Halstead?” Kelly asked inquisitively once Hailey was far enough away. 

“I’ve always thought so, but rumour on the street is that she’s with Ruzek”, Stella whispered to Kelly. 

He looked surprised by that one, “Interesting…. Wonder what Burgess thinks.”

“Ya that’s a complicated one. Between you and me, I’m rooting for her and Jay.”

“Me too”, he smiled at her, thinking of another couple he was rooting for in his mind.

Hailey sighed as she closed her apartment door, set her keys on the side table and threw her coat in the closet. What a long day, she was thankful that she had Friday off. As she was getting ready for bed, she suddenly felt her stomach turn, and not in a good way.  
She ran to the bathroom just in time to empty the contents of her stomach in the toilet. 

Ugh, perfect, she thought. Leave it to her luck to come down with the stomach flu on her weekend off. She silently cursed Jay for this, although she expected it was coming at some point, but why on her day off!

The rest of the night was spent running to and from the bathroom, she could barely manage to make it back to her bed. All she wanted to do was sleep on the cold floor next to her shower. She fell back asleep at some point late in the night, hoping the worst had passed.

She woke up a few hours later, looking at her clock and seeing it was 11:00 am. She cautiously got up, not one hundred percent confident in her stomach just yet, but was relieved when she took a sip of water and it didn’t immediately come back up. 

She checked her phone and saw a missed call and a text from Jay, a voicemail from Adam and a text from Stella thanking her for their drinks last night. She replied to Stella first and said, “No problem. Day off today, was sick all night, sorry in advance if you and Kelly come down with this flu!”

Stella wrote back almost immediately and said, “Aww, sorry to hear that. Don’t worry about us we’re all good, take care of yourself! Let me know if you need anything.”

Hailey smiled, Stella was so sweet. Her next call was to Jay, who was probably wondering where she was. He answered on the third ring.

“Hey Hails. Where ya been?”

“Voight gave me the day off, just woke up. Good thing too, I was sick all night.”

Jay cringed on the other end of the phone. “Ahh, sorry. That’s probably my bad. You okay? You need anything? I’m finally feeling a little more normal today.”

She managed a laugh, “Well it was my own choice looking after you all week, bound to catch up with me at some point. I’m okay, hopefully the worst is over. I’m still not feeling very well, I’ll probably go back to bed for the rest of the day. I’ll be good.”

“Okay, well call me if you need anything…down to hold up my end of the partner bargain tonight.”

Hailey smiled and thanked him for his concern, but she wanted to just lay in bed and feel sorry for herself alone. Like Jay, she didn’t like people fussing over her. They ended their call and next she listened to the voicemail from Adam.

“Hey darlin, hope you have a good day today. I miss you, call me back later.”

She sighed and felt bad for being distant with him this week, he was hurting too after all. She gave him a call back and got him after a few rings. 

“Hey”, her voice cracked as he picked up.

“Hey. You don’t sound very good”, he said, concern in his voice.

“Ya I think I picked up whatever Jay had this week. Need a day to myself to sleep it off.”

“Aww, okay. You want me to come over there and keep you company?” He asked.

“That’s sweet of you Adam, but I’m okay. I don’t want you to get this too. I think I’m just going to lie in bed all day.”

“That sounds like somewhere I’d like to be too”, he said mischievously.

Hailey laughed, “Trust me, I am not very sexy right now. Plus you can’t drive silly.”

Adam’s turn to let out a laugh, “That is true. Keep forgetting about this bum shoulder. Okay well I’ll call to check on you later, get some sleep.”

“Thanks, I will. Have a good day!”

Hailey set her phone on her night table, loving the fact that she didn’t need to set an alarm. She felt her eyelids become heavy and allowed her body to relax.

She woke up in a sweat, her body wracking with chills. This is what I get for sleeping with Jay two nights in a row I guess. She checked her phone and saw it was 6 o’clock, surprised she slept for so long, her body must have needed it. 

She was feeling less nauseous now, but her body was still aching, and now she had a fever. She hated being sick, much like the rest of the world, but really, who has time for this. She was about to get up to head downstairs to find some medicine when she heard noises coming from her kitchen. She suddenly went from on her deathbed to fight or flight mode, adrenaline kicking in. She grabbed her gun and silently made her way down the stairs. She was preparing herself for the worst as if someone had broken into her apartment. But when she turned the corner she was surprised to see a familiar face doing the dishes she left in her sink. 

“Jay what the hell! I could have shot you. I thought you were an intruder!” She said sounding half relieved, half terrified.

He turned around to look at her and tried to hold back laughing at what he saw, Hailey in her pyjamas, with a gun in her hand. 

“Do I have the right to remain silent? Any dishes I leave in the sink will be held against me? He said, holding two plates in the air, he couldn’t help himself and broke out laughing. 

She couldn’t stay mad long, he always knew how to make her smile.

“Alright I’ll give you that one, that was funny”, she said as she put the safety on her gun and set it on the table.

“How did you get in here anyways?! Last time I checked I didn’t give you a key….” She asked with an eyebrow raised.

“Hailey, I’m an elite Detective. That doesn’t mean I’m above a good old fashioned B & E every once in a while”, he said nonchalantly. 

She rolled her eyes, leave it to Jay to break into her apartment strictly to do her dishes and clean up the place.

“Plus, I thought you might want something to eat by now. He motioned to the takeout bag on the counter. I brought you some soup from that Thai place around the corner that you loveee”, he said slowly smiling, in hopes it would make her less mad at him. 

She looked at him with a scowl, but was secretly glad he came by. She was hungry, and the food there was her go to, especially when she was under the weather. 

“That was sweet of you Jay. Thanks”, she smiled. “But, you didn’t have to do this, I was just going…”

He cut her off. “You were just going to be alone for the night? Ya, that’s not happening.”

She looked at him curiously. 

“You took care of me all week Hailey, it’s my turn to take care of you now. I know you don’t like people fussing, neither do I. But you are going to eat something and then we’re going to binge Netflix and that’s an order”, he said matter of factly. 

A smile slowly spread across her face. “Are you pulling rank? Can’t argue with that.”

“Are you okay though really? You’re not looking so good”, Jay asked her, noticing how pale she was.

She gave in and admitted it, “I feel terrible. My body hurts.”

“I’m sorry. It’s my fault that you’re run down”, he said with a guilty look on his face.

“It’s okay Jay. I wouldn’t redo this week differently”, she smiled weakly.

He looked back at her and said “Go lie down, I’ll bring you some food”, as he put a hand on her shoulder and motioned to her couch.

She turned to make her way to her living room, shaking her head, grinning from ear to ear, Jay was one in a million.

He came in a few minutes later with their dinner warmed up. He handed Hailey a glass of water and some Tylenol. He felt her forehead with the back of his hand, the tables turned. “Thought so. Here, take these, you have a fever.” 

“Thanks”, she said quietly, she was starting to lose her voice. 

The soup made her throat feel much better, it was the perfect meal for a chilly night like this too. Jay turned the fireplace on and they picked out something to watch on Netflix, some murder documentary that they both heard was good.

Jay was super into this show, Hailey on the other hand, was in and out of sleep through all the episodes that played. On a normal day she could hardly keep her eyes opened during movies, but she didn’t stand a chance being sick tonight. He let her sleep, and pretended not to notice when she jolted herself up, making it seem like she was awake the whole time. He paused the show when the episode ended and quietly took their dishes back into the kitchen to clean up. Hailey had done so much for him this week, way beyond what was required of their partnership, so it was time for him to return the favour. 

He came back to find her in a different position on the couch than when he left. Her head was resting against the one end on a pillow and she had brought her feet up to lie down. He smiled looking at her, even sick she was something else. He loved her messy hair and no makeup, she was so naturally pretty. But when he got closer he noticed that she was shivering in her sleep. Poor thing. He pressed the back of his hand up against her cheek gently, still pretty warm, and grabbed a blanket and gently tucked her in. He slowly slid under her feet and let them fall in his lap. This is exactly what she did for me the other night, he thought. He set his hands on top of her feet, in a protective way and for a minute found himself thinking about this being their future together, curled up on the couch by the fire. He couldn’t think of a place he’d rather be.

She woke herself up with a cough a few hours later, to find Jay staring at her and his hands on her feet that were resting in his lap.

“Ughhh”, she groaned, sounding more congested than a few hours before. 

“Still not feeling well, huh”, he said quietly.

She shook her head, too stuffy to reply, trying hard not to sniffle. She felt gross, and certainly did not want Jay to see her with snot running down her face.

“I know just the thing that will make you feel better”, he said with a smirk.

She couldn’t figure out what he could possibly be smiling about, she felt terrible, but also intrigued by his enthusiasm.

He came back about 15 minutes later with two mugs in his hand. “Our thing, it’s been too long. Just slightly different.”

She was confused and looked into the mug, still unsure what was inside.

“Tea?” She asked.

“Hot toddy.” 

She still look confused, clearly she had never had one before. 

“There’s some lemon and honey and hot water, and oh ya, whisky”, he smiled.

“Say no more”, she laughed as she sipped it slowly.

“Must be an Irish thing, my parents used to make these for us all the time when we were sick as kids. Will and I always felt really cool, even though there was hardly any whisky in ours”, he looked down and smiled.

She looked at him as he momentarily zoned out, clearly remembering a fond time of his life.

“Anyways”, he came back to reality, “I have a long standing theory that this will cure any sickness.”

“Well I’m up to try any remedy at this point”, she replied.

“Trust me, this will work”, he told her. 

“You know Jay, breakfast may be my love language, but whisky by a fire is certainly yours”, she glanced over at him.

He grinned, “Accurate. But you do know that really just means we have the same love language right.”

She looked perplexed. 

“Quality time together”, he said confidently, and squeezed her feet that were no longer in his lap, but close enough to be grazing his thigh. 

Hailey smiled back at him. Jay had the kindest heart, even though he kept it guarded most of the time. She was equal parts curious and enamoured by this side of him he revealed this week.

“I feel like I’ve learned more about you this week than I have in the past two years”, she blurted out.

“I don’t open up to a lot of people. I’m kind of like an onion, I have a lot of layers”, he replied and smiled as he made eye contact with her.

“I’ve noticed”, she chuckled.

They finished the rest of their drinks exchanging stories and ended up playing the favourite game at Hailey’s suggestion.

“You’ve never played the favourite game?” She said as if it was the most important game of all time.

“Never”, he laughed.

“Okay well it’s easy. You literally just ask what each person’s favourite random things are. I’ll go first…What’s your favourite ice cream?”

“Mint chocolate chip”, he replied with no hesitation. 

“Interesting, thought you would be more of a cookies and cream guy. Good to know. Your turn.”

“Hmm, okay. What’s your favourite movie of all time?”

“Titanic, for sure.” 

Jay started laughing hysterically.

“What’s so funny about that!” She threw a pillow at him.

“That’s your favourite movie, of all movies, Titanic?” He couldn’t stop laughing.

“Part of this game is trust Jay. If you tell anyone that, I will kill you. And yes Titanic is the best movie of all time. There was room for Jack on that door, you know it, I know it. The world knows it.”

Now they both couldn’t stop laughing. “What’s your favourite song?”

He thought about this one for a while. “That’s a tough one. Not sure I can pick just one. But if I had to, probably Coming Home by City and Colour.”

He was waiting for her to laugh at this obscure choice, but instead her eyes lit up with surprise. “My favourite song of all time, is Northern Wind by City and Colour.”

He was quiet for a few seconds, a bit surprised by this coincidence. “When I was deployed, I listened to both of those a lot.”

He stared at her quietly with a gaze she couldn’t quite put her finger on. She added, “Plus, he’s Canadian too. We lived in Winnipeg for a few years when I was a kid, so Canada has a special place in my heart, simpler days.”

“How did I not know that you lived in Canada?” Jay changed the subject, the sparks between them were palpable at this point. “I really do not know as much about you as I thought I did”, he shook his head in confusion. 

“Maybe we’re more alike than we realize”, she smiled with a twinkle in her eyes. 

“Maybe”, he nodded his head. 

There was a moment of silence between them, his eyes were fiercely fixated on her. Jay broke the silence first.

“You drove my truck the other day didn’t you”, he asked inquisitively.

She smiled slowly, “That depends, am I in trouble or no?”

He shook his head and chuckled, “Of course not. I just had something in there…I can’t find it and I’m worried you might be upset with me.”

“If this is about my bracelet, I have it in my coat pocket”, she replied, one step ahead of him.

He looked relieved. “Oh thank God, I was hoping you grabbed it while you were in there. Or else I was going to kick myself for losing the thing you thought you lost but actually didn’t…”, he rambled. 

She smiled, “I CANNOT believe you had that this whole time and didn’t tell me! I’ve been looking everywhere. I was devastated, thought it was gone forever.”

“I found it under the mat of my truck last week while I was cleaning it out. The clasp is broken, I was going to bring it to a jeweller to have it fixed for you as a surprise, but then I got sick and forgot all about it, sorry”, he said sheepishly.

She looked touched. “You didn’t have to do that. I’m just happy to have it back. Thanks for keeping it safe, that bracelet is so special to me. My mom gave it to me….” 

“And her mom gave it to her…It’s all the way from Greece. Real sapphires. I know how important it is to you”, he finished off her sentence.

Hailey was taken aback. So he does listen to me. When she asked Adam if he had seen it, maybe it fell off somewhere at his place, he looked at her like she had two heads. You wear a bracelet usually? Was his actual response, clearly oblivious to the items she holds dear to her, unlike her partner. “You’re a good egg, you know that Jay Halstead”, she gave him an intense look and sipped the rest of her hot toddy in silence. 

They switched gears from their murder documentary to something a bit lighter, naturally picking Friends. It didn’t take long for Hailey to fall asleep again, this time sitting upright, her head had made its way to Jay’s shoulder. He paused for a second to take a mental picture of this, his heart began to beat a little faster. Jay checked his watch, almost 11 o’clock. Although he was feeling much better, he was still a bit wiped out from this week, and he felt his eyes getting heavy as well. He tried to shake Hailey awake to tell her to head up to bed but she didn’t budge, all he got was a mumbled groan. 

“Hailey, wake up, time for bed”, he gently rubbed her arm.

“Mmmm”, was all she replied, still fast asleep. 

“Okay, we can do it that way too”, he whispered.

He slowly got off the couch and slid one arm under her neck and one under her knees to scoop her up and carry her to bed, laughing at the fact she didn’t even wake up when he moved her, she was total dead weight in his arms.

He laid her down in her bed and pulled the blankets over her, making sure she would be warm enough. He turned to leave the room quietly, catching one last glimpse of her before he turned off the lights. 

When he went back to her living room, he had a decision to make. He never stayed over, in fear he would have a nightmare and scare Hailey. But now that she knows about them, he suddenly didn’t feel as anxious. He was way too tired to drive, and he probably shouldn’t since he had the equivalent of a few drinks. Hailey was sick too, he didn’t want to leave her in case anything happened. He grabbed an extra blanket and pillow from her hall closet and laid down on the couch, falling asleep shortly after.  
Hailey woke up in the middle of the night, 4:30 to be exact. She looked around, realizing she was in her room. Interesting, how did I get here? She wondered. Occasionally she did sleep walk and ended up in different places around her apartment, but this didn’t seem like that situation. She shook her head in confusion, still half asleep, her brain unable to process how she made it upstairs. She was so thirsty, and got up to grab a drink of water. As she turned the corner to the kitchen, she heard a faint snore coming from her living room, and for a moment forgot that Jay had been here. She quietly snuck in and saw him fast asleep on her couch, her heart swelled as she watched his chest rise and fall, no sign of distress as he slept. He stayed.


	12. French Toast

Chapter 12

After watching Jay sleep peacefully for a few minutes and covering him with the blanket that had fallen partially off the couch, Hailey made her way back upstairs and slept soundly the rest of the night.

She woke up early the next morning to more ruckus coming from her kitchen. What could he possibly be doing now, she thought curiously. He didn’t hear her coming around the corner at first and wow was she glad for that. She watched him for a minute, barely containing her laughter. His back was facing her as he was dancing to an early 2000s hip hop play list and cooking something over the stove, clearly enjoying himself on this bright and early Saturday, unaware of her presence. 

“Mhmm”, she cleared her throat, trying to hide a smile.

He whipped around, blushing slightly, but then laughed as his eyes met hers. 

“Hey, didn’t see you there”, he said coyly.

“Nothing like a little Biggie and Ja Rule to get the weekend going am I right”, she laughed.

“Old thing back is my jam”, he grinned. “You feeling better?”

“Little bit, my voice is still gone. But I’ll live. How did I get back to my room last night?” She asked him curiously.

“I carried you”, he replied, waiting for her reaction.

She raised an eyebrow at him, and for a moment her mind went elsewhere before she had to focus her thoughts on the present. “Oh. Well thanks.”

By the look on her face, he knew he caught her off-guard, and wasn’t sure how she felt about him doing that. Maybe he overstepped. He decided to lighten the mood.

“You know, you are much heavier than you look”, he barely got that sentence out before Hailey playfully punched his arm and laughed.

She rolled her eyes and surveyed what he had going on the stove. 

“What’s this?” She asked while hovering behind his shoulder.  
“Cinnamon French toast. A Saturday morning Halstead tradition. Old family recipe. Will is going to be jealous that I did this for you”, he told her with a smirk. 

“Breakfast twice in one week huh. You better be careful, I might make you do this for me more often”, she replied cheekily. 

He glanced at her, fighting the urge to tell her he wanted to have breakfast with her every morning. That may be a bit too forward for him, for their situation, for right now anyways. He had longed for someone to spend Saturday mornings with for a long time now. He wanted it to be Hailey, but under the right circumstances. Adam was his friend, he wasn’t going to be shady about it.

“Ya, ya. If you tell anyone at work I can cook, you’re going to be in trouble”, he chose instead.

“Our little secret”, her eyes looking more blue than ever in the morning sun shining through her window. 

She put a pot of coffee on for them, and set the table for breakfast. 

“Hailey you’re sick, you shouldn’t have coffee. Orange juice. He swatted her hand away from her mug.”

“You’re still sick too Jay, a little caffeine isn’t going to hurt us at this point.”

“Fine, but you’re having some fruit too”, he compromised. 

“Okay mom”, she rolled her eyes and they both laughed. 

Once they were settled at the table, Hailey was impressed by the spread. French toast smothered in syrup and fresh berries. She didn’t realize she had all of this stuff in her fridge. With everything that happened this week, she didn’t have much time for grocery shopping.

“So, you stayed over last night”, she stated the obvious. 

“I did”, he nodded from across the table.

“You slept okay?” She said fishing, both of them knowing what she was getting at.

“I haven’t had a nightmare since we talked the other day.”

“That’s good Jay. Sometimes talking to someone helps.”

She smiled, knowing how important this step was for him. Letting someone in. She was glad it was her. “Thanks for looking after me last night too. Not a good health week for team Upstead.”

He chuckled, “Didn’t know we had a team name.”

“Oh ya, Upstead. It’s definitely a thing.”

“Eat your breakfast you weirdo”, he said playfully, shaking his head.

They finished their breakfast, enjoying each others company and the throwbacks coming from the play list. Hailey loved a good kitchen dance party, and they had one while cleaning up. She announced she was going to go shower and put some laundry on, get the sickness out of this place. 

“Sorry you had to see me like this by the way, I need to pull myself together. I do wash my hair regularly I promise”, she said, suddenly feeling a bit self conscious about her appearance in front of Jay.

He laughed, “Hailey you slept in my bed holding me, not once, but twice this week while I was sick as a dog. I think we are waaay past that.” The truth was, looking at her now, in a messy bun and sweats, he thought she never looked better. 

“That is true”, she said confidently. 

“I’ll finish up the dishes”, he told her, and shooed her away to get ready.

Hailey stripped her bed and threw everything in her washing machine, disinfected her bathroom and cracked a window to let some air in. She jumped in the shower, and stood under the hot water for what felt like an eternity. She felt way better, a cold still lingering, but she got off lucky and wasn’t as sick as Jay was earlier in the week. Maybe his hot toddy theory was right. By the time she got out and went back downstairs Jay was nowhere to be found. She saw a note left for her on the counter that read, Had to go pick Will up, his car wouldn’t start after his shift. I’ll see you later, DO NOT watch Ferris Bueller without me.”

She grinned, a classic sick day movie. She peaked outside her window, the sun was shining but it still looked frigid out there, and windy. No chance she was leaving her place today. 

She picked up her phone to call Adam and see how he was doing. She wasn’t sure if she should tell him about Jay staying over. If he asked, she would be honest, but what he doesn’t know wouldn’t hurt him right? 

“Hey, I was beginning to get worried about you”, he said on the other end.

“I’m okay. Good as new! Feeling much better today”, she reassured him.

“That’s good to hear. What a week huh? Have you had anything to eat?”

“Jay dropped by last night and brought me some soup, I think he was feeling guilty”, she laughed nervously, leaving out the breakfast part.

Adam was quiet on the other end for a second. “Oh, that’s good. I’m glad you weren’t alone. Sounds like you had good company”.

There it was. He was jealous, maybe a little angry, she couldn’t tell.

“I didn’t know he was stopping by Adam, it wasn’t a big deal.”

“Ya, no of course. You guys have your partner thing.”

The conversation got a little awkward from there. Hailey wasn’t sure how to handle the growing tension. She didn’t want to kick him while he was down either, but the reality was they hadn’t seen much of each other lately, work had been crazy, then this whole thing with Jay. She told him she’d talk to him later, a chat about their future together was impending. 

Across town, Jay got to the hospital and saw Will standing in the entryway to the emergency department, waiting for him. He saw the pull truck up and made a mad dash to avoid the cold. 

“Yikes”, he said as he got in the truck, slamming the door behind him. “It is freezing out today.”

“It sure is, this week has been brutal. I think this cold weather is supposed to break in the next few days”, Jay said as he handed Will a coffee. 

“Thanks I need this. And thanks for coming to pick me up. I called AAA but they are slammed today. I guess I’m not the only one whose car wouldn’t start in this weather, go figure”, Will replied. 

“Ya no worries, I was up anyways. What are you going to do with your car?”

“I’m just going to leave it here for the day. I have to be back in the morning anyways. That seems like a tomorrow Will problem. I just want to get home to bed I am so tired.”

“Okay, sounds good. I can give you a lift in the morning.”

“That won’t interfere with your plans will it?” Will asked.

“No I’m good. No plans for tonight really. Was going to go check on Hailey again later, she’s sick now too”, Jay mentioned.

Will’s face turned towards Jay suspiciously. “You stayed at her place last night didn’t you?”

Jay tried to hide his lips curling up into a smile. “I might have.”

“Jay”, Will started. 

“Before you get ahead of yourself, nothing happened. She’s my partner. I care about her. She was good to me this week, I was just returning the favour. It’s nothing.”

“It’s not nothing Jay. She slept in your bed with you this week, two nights in a row. What I walked in on the other morning was not nothing, I could tell by the look on your face. And you know, the hand thing”, Will elaborated. 

“How do you know she was over twice? You were at work”, Jay asked curiously, neither confirming or denying the fact, ignoring everything else Will had just said. 

“How do you think she got in. I slipped her a key the other day and told her to consider checking on you. I know how you get when you’re sick”, he said trying to dodge around the nightmare conversation.

“Interesting. I figured she just picked the lock”, he sort of smiled.

Will rolled his eyes. “Regardless. I see the way you look at her.” 

“She’s with Adam”, Jay told him coldly, a hint of disappointment in his voice.

“I didn’t ask who she was with. I’m just saying, something tells me she feels the same way about you too. There is no way ‘just a friend’ would do what she did for you this week, partners or not.”

Jay didn’t say anything back to that, just kind of nodded his head after thinking about it for a second. 

“Listen, I know you don’t like letting people in. And I’m not exactly the most qualified to be giving relationship advice right now either, but you need to tell her Jay. I know you’re scared. Especially what happened last time around, but Hailey doesn’t seem like that type of girl”, he said hinting about Erin. 

“You’re a pain in the ass you know that”, Jay told him brushing it off. “But, hypothetically, if I did have that conversation with Hailey”….he said trailing off and paused for a minute. “It would change everything, and I’m not sure either of us are ready for that just yet”, he replied honestly.  
Will smirked and took that as a win, he finally got Jay to admit it, even in the most roundabout way. Unbeknownst to both of them, this was the second heart to heart in Jay’s truck about their relationship this week. 

“She did love mom’s Cinnamon French Toast this morning though”, he said cheekily, knowing this would really get Will going. 

His mouth dropped from the passenger seat. “You didn’t.”

“Oh, I did. Full stop. Berries and everything”, Jay laughed. 

“Alright, that settles it. When’s the wedding”, Will replied with a huge grin on his face.

Jay’s eyes rolled and shook his head, turning his attention back to the road, he had given Will enough ammunition for one day. 

The two of them got back to Jay’s apartment and Will barely got in the door before he dropped his bags and retreated to his room, the extra shifts this week were taking a toll on him. 

Jay found himself hovering around his own apartment, a little lost at what to do with himself today. He had a million things to catch up on after having a sick week, but all he could think about was going back to be with Hailey. He decided to go to the gym to try and clear his head, and to work up his strength again. 

He returned a few hours later, feeling a little more relaxed, less anxious. It felt good to be back in the gym. Jay cracked Will’s bedroom door and found him exactly how he left him, fast asleep. 

He checked his phone and began sorting through all the emails he missed this week about work. Finger print results, surveillance photos, incident reports, the works. Being off a few days really makes paperwork get out of control. He realized that they had forgot to submit their report about their stakeout from Monday, so he took it upon himself to get that finished up and fired it off to Voight. Minutes later, he got a call from Voight himself.

“Halstead, I see you’re back online”, he said in his gravelly voice.

“Ya Sarge, I’m good. Feeling a lot better. Thanks for letting me take the week off.”

“Of course. Antonio and I caught up with Armstrong on Wednesday, we have a deal in the works with him and a CI in the next few days here.”

“Good. Glad to hear, do you need me to do anything?”

“Not today. I tried reaching Hailey for that report, but I take it she’s been a little busy the last few days”, he say slyly.

“Mhmm”, Jay cleared his throat, unsure how he should go about this. “Uhh ya, I guess so. Lot going on this week, must have just slipped her mind.”

“Right, okay well you tell her that I will also see her on Monday. Enjoy your weekend off”, Voight replied.

“Thanks Sarge, see you Monday”, Jay said as he hung up the phone, that was weird. 

Jay hopped in the shower, made himself some lunch and spent the rest of the afternoon in front of the TV watching sports highlights.

Will reappeared a few hours later, looking slightly more alive, immediately reaching for the coffee pot.

“You know, drinking that much coffee cannot be good for you Will”, Jay chimed in from the couch.

“From the guy who has at least 3 cups a day”, Will replied sarcastically. “You try working 3 night shifts, one of which was a double this week.”

Jay grinned, “Okay you got me.”

Jay’s phone pinged from a message from Hailey. 

Pizza and Blackhawks. My place tonight.

He liked that she didn’t even ask him, it was more of a statement. He appreciated her assertiveness.

Down. Is it alright if I bring Will? I think he needs a night to not think about hospital related things. 

Of course. As long as he like’s Lou’s, he’s good in my books. See you soon!

Jay smiled, girl loved her Lou Malnati’s, it was her own Saturday night ritual that she was inviting him and Will over for. 

“Will, you want to come with me to Hailey’s tonight? We’re ordering Lou’s and watching the Hawks. I think you need a night out”, he yelled from the kitchen.

He came out of his room and looked at his brother for a minute, surprised by the invite, he figured he would want some alone time with Hailey. Or maybe after their conversation this morning, he wanted a third person around in order to avoid said conversation.  
“Sure, that sounds good. Let me get showered and ready here. What time are we leaving?”

Jay looked at the time, 5 o’clock. “Hmm let’s say an hour, game starts at 7. I have to pick up beer on the way.”

Will nodded and went back to his room to get ready. 

They showed up at Hailey’s not long after. Will grabbed the beer and they headed up her front steps and knocked on the door. In just a split second, Will heard a small yelp and turned around quickly to realize Jay had slipped on some ice on her front walkway and came down hard, hitting his side off her stairs. 

“Are you alright? Anything hurt?” He said cautiously. 

“Just my pride”, Jay said grimacing as he held his sore hip.

Hailey opened the door at the perfect time to witness all of this go down, and laughed at Jay alongside Will, after asking if he was alright first of course.

“You really should shovel your walkway Hailey”, he told her as she continued to laugh at him.

“You know that’s been on my list this week, but other things got in the way.”

Jay just nodded and pulled himself up off the icy pathway and made his way into her apartment. Stupid Chicago winters, he cursed to himself.

The smell of fresh deep dish hit their noses and made them even hungrier than they were a few minutes ago. Hailey grabbed their coats, and told them dinner was ready in the kitchen. 

They all sat around the island and made a drink before heading back into the living room to watch the hockey game. 

“Hailey, Jay told me you were sick. Are you feeling better?” Will asked her, the inner doctor in him couldn’t help but ask.

“Much better, think it was just a little bug. You’re brave, wanting to hangout with the two of us tonight, after how sick we’ve both been this week.”

“Hailey I work in the emergency department. I’m not afraid of a little bug, especially from my brother and his partner”, Will replied.

“Ya Hails, where do you think all of the germs came from this week”, Jay chimed in.

“Oh, so we have you to blame for this Will. Patient zero”, Hailey smirked.

“Okay, okay. I might have been a little sick myself last week”, Will admitted. “But I think it was really just a blessing in disguise no? Look at all the quality time you’ve spent together this week, few days off of work”, he rambled but stopped himself from going any further, he could practically feel the daggers Jay’s eyes were shooting at him.

Will’s mention of quality time had Jay and Hailey giving each other a quick knowing glance, silently communicating the love language that they shared. 

“Not looking good for the Hawks this year”, Will stated.

“You never know, they’ve been on a run lately. Kane has been killing it”, Jay said.

“A healthy Crawford makes all the difference for this team”, Hailey added.

They watched the first period of the game, stuffing their faces with pizza and laughing over random banter. Will thought it was odd seeing Jay like this, laughing, voluntarily sharing stories and memories, joking around. Even just the way he was lying on her couch, feet up on the coffee table, he didn’t even really do this at his own place, his body language was telling. Like home. He couldn’t remember the last time he saw him so relaxed. Sure he wasn’t a pain all the time, but so rarely did he let his guard down in front of other people, Will included. Whatever him and Hailey have going is good for him.

Hailey hopped up off the couch to bring the dishes into her kitchen and grab them another round of drinks. Jay went to get up to help her then quickly sat back down, wincing at the pain he felt from the bruise forming along his side. She noticed and shook her head. 

“You’re a mess this week, I’ll grab you some ice”, she said while smiling.

“Yep. Just a little tender”, his face scrunched up.

Will got up to help Hailey with the kitchen cleanup instead, noticing a perfect opportunity to get her alone to thank her for looking out for Jay this week.

“Oh don’t worry about this, I can clean up later Will”, she told him as he started on the dishes.

“No, no it’s okay. Between the two of us we can have this cleaned up in no time.”

“Plus, I just wanted to say thank you, you know, for what you did for Jay this week”, he said. 

She smiled, “He’s my partner, of course.”

Will thought it was interesting, that Jay said the same thing about her when he quizzed him on looking after her while she was sick. 

“Is he always like this around you?” Will asked curiously.

“Like what?”

“Funny?” Hailey smiled at that one. “I just haven’t seen him laugh like this in a long time, that’s all”, Will looked down, Jay used to be such a funny kid. The war changed him. 

She grinned, “Ya I would say he’s pretty funny, mostly in private though”, she added, understanding Will’s train of thought.

“That’s good to hear”, Will grinned. “I understand the roles were reversed last night.”

Hailey thought about her response, she didn’t want to give too much away. “Ya he took good care of me. This week has been interesting for sure. I’ve learned a lot about him.” 

“Under the tough exterior, deep down, Jay is very caring, has always been so gentle”, Will told her in a hushed voice, he peaked his head around the corner to make sure Jay couldn’t hear them. Hailey just listened, it was obvious he wanted to get something off his chest. 

“You know, I may be the doctor now, but Jay was always the one wanting to take care of people when he was a kid. He’s protective, and a worrier. He cares about other people more than he tends to care about his own well-being. Especially when my mom was sick, I wasn’t there. But Jay was, and he took care of her every single day. Even at a time when he probably needed a little care himself.”

That part never dawned on Hailey. She always just assumed since Will was the doctor in the family, naturally he was the more caring and nurturing one. She listened quietly as Will finished. 

“So thank you, for this week. I know it wasn’t easy. I’m glad he has you. He needs some stability in his life. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him this relaxed or comfortable around someone, maybe ever”, there I said it, he thought.

Hailey didn’t really know what to say, she just kind of looked at Will with sympathetic eyes. Will sensed her confusion or maybe his lack of directness, so he added, “I’ve held his hand through a lot of rough nights too.”

She attempted a half smile and nodded, biting her lip to keep it from quivering, worried that if she spoke she might get emotional, it felt good knowing that Will thought highly enough of her to share this. The look was enough, Will got it. Hailey opened her freezer and pulled out a bag of frozen peas for Jay and followed Will back into the living room.  
“Will stop, I’m fine. It’s just a bruise”, Jay was busy swatting his hand away from pulling up his shirt to check out his side.

“Alright fine suit yourself”, Will sighed in frustration. 

When Hailey came in with the ice wrapped in a towel. She paused before giving it to him and gave him a look, knowing this was the side that a bullet tore through not too long ago. 

He rolled his eyes and knew what was coming next. He let her lift his shirt up to check out the already black and blue bruise spreading along his hip and back. 

“Oooof, Jay”, she muttered under her breath and gently put the ice on his side, seeing the pained look on his face relax slowly. She had a brief flashback of her hovering over him lying on the pavement, pressing her hands down to try and stop the blood spilling out of his side. He was so pale… She shuddered and blinked to shake herself out of it, Jay noticing her staring at the small scar that was left there, realizing what she was thinking about. 

He slowly lifted his left hand to set it on top of hers, the one holding the ice in place and gave her a long reassuring nod, while she took a deep breath in. Their eyes met just long enough for Will to notice.

Will thought this was even more curious, they seemed to have their own silent form of communication, and he let her tend to his sore hip. Jay was very anti-touch for the most part, but guess this was not the case with Hailey. 

Jay caught Will staring at him from the corner of his eye, and shot him a “Don’t you dare” look back at him.

“That’s a nasty bruise Jay, that’s going to hurt for a while”, Will told him, while maintaining a safe distance, he didn’t want to get too close and interrupt whatever it was that was happening here.

“I’ve had worse, those stairs came at me quick”, he joked and looked at Hailey, hoping she would appreciate the humour. 

‘It’s not my fault you’re a klutz”, she replied.

Hailey settled back on the couch, putting her feet up on the coffee table, like nothing happened, and they continued to drink their beer and watch the hockey game. 

Will was baffled. But now he understood exactly why Jay invited him along tonight. This tension was almost too much for him to bear and it wasn’t even him who had feelings for Hailey. They were telling each other they loved one another in all of the ways except verbally.   
The rest of the evening went by smoothly, Jay and Will excused themselves shortly after the game was over, a win for the Blackhawks, because Will had to work early the next morning. On their way out, Hailey hung in her doorframe and stopped him, “Hey Jay?”

He turned around to face her, wishing he was staying the night again, “What Hails.”

“Watch your step”, she said with a grin.


	13. Birthday

Chapter 13

Hailey didn’t hear from Jay on Sunday, which wasn’t unusual. But that didn’t mean she didn’t want to hear from him. He probably just needed some space and to get his head in the right place to go back to work tomorrow. Part of her was dreading going back to work together. Knowing what she knew now. This last week it seemed like they were operating in some sort of fantasy alternate reality…All the time they spent together, watching movies, cooking, taking care of one another. Relaxing and being able to actually connect on a personal level about things that weren’t work related. It didn’t seem real. It made things less complicated for their friendship, but more complicated for their working relationship. They often didn’t have time to do this sort of thing, all of their energy was focused on work, and if it wasn’t, it was trying to find a way to unwind from work. Although this had been a stressful week in other ways, and they both had been sick, part of her thought this was the most refreshed, physically and emotionally, she had been in years. 

They showed up at the district around the same time Monday morning, exchanging hello’s and walking in together. Jay had brought her a latte which she was grateful for. Platt gave Hailey a look that was something fierce as they walked by, she tried to ignore it.

“Morning you two. Halstead, good to see you vertical”, Platt greeted them.

“Didn’t realize you’ve ever seen me horizontal Sarge”, Jay replied with a smirk and his familiar sass.

Platt paused, her signature grin spreading across her face. “I could make so many jokes right now. But you know what, I’ll let you have this one since you had a rough week.” 

“My hero”, Jay raised his hand over his heart, much to the liking of Hailey who could not keep it together as Platt went back to her paperwork and they made their way upstairs.

“What’s gotten into you this morning”, she laughed.

“Just happy to be back”, he told her.

Voight began prepping everyone for the deal they were setting up with Jason Armstrong, the criminal they were doing surveillance on last week, which seemed like ages ago after the few days they had. Antonio was going undercover to buy cocaine, Hailey and Jay would come in and arrest him along with Armstrong and try to get him to flip on his suppliers. Easy enough. The deal was going down around lunch. 

The morning was spent catching up on paperwork and preparing their background on Armstrong and the dealers working out of Inglewood. If they could catch a bigger fish, that would help get a lot of drugs off the street, and hopefully prevent more overdoses from happening. There had been way too many deaths as of late because of this bad batch. 

Kevin got a call from his CI who told him Armstrong was bringing two other guys with him to the deal, they were getting a little suspicious.

“Okay, I don’t feel comfortable having Hailey and Jay go in there alone now. Kim, Kev you’re going too”, Voight told them after reviewing the plans, Hailey and Jay would be outnumbered. Antonio would be there, but they wanted to try and avoid blowing his cover at all costs. 

The team got ready to head out and take down Armstrong, and maybe even his other friends. Kim and Kevin were parked down an alley behind the house that Antonio and Armstrong were meeting at. Hailey and Jay were a little closer in plain view of the house and were waiting for them to arrive.

“How’s your hip?” She asked.

“Gnarly bruise, but way better. Not as sore anymore”, he replied as he turned his body and lifted his shirt to show her the damage, fifty shades of purple and blue covering his side.

She knew he just did it instinctively, he wasn’t trying to show off his abs, or was he, she thought. They did go to the gym together most days so it’s not like that should surprise her, but wow, Jay was fit. She tried not to stare too long.

“Ouch”, she made a face and laughed, trying to cover up the fact that she was blushing a bit. Jay seemed to notice this and turned away, looking pleased with himself.

Out of the corner of her eye she saw Armstrong pull up, Antonio hiding in the shadows of the alley next to the house. Saved by the drug deal, she thought.

“Okay, this is it. Let them do the exchange and then we’ll move in. You good?” Jay asked.

“I’m good, let’s go.” 

The takedown was relatively uneventful, they did it quietly so no one came out to witness. This wasn’t the kind of neighbourhood where police presence was welcomed. Armstrong ended up showing up alone too, so Kim and Kev were able to maintain their positions. Hailey and Jay picked up Antonio and Armstrong and drove them back to the station.

“You know Hailey, you could have gone a little easier on me, I’m not actually a criminal you know”, Antonio laughed once they finally got him separated from Armstrong.

“Just doing my job. I had to make it look real?”, Hailey grinned. 

“I’m not as young as I once was”, Antonio replied with a smile, pretending to rub his side in pain. 

“You’re fine, I don’t think he suspects a thing either. Not the sharpest tool in the shed, if you know what I mean”, Hailey answered.

“No surprise there. Glad we got him. Hopefully Jay can get some information out of him”, Antonio replied. 

They both watched from behind the glass as Jay conducted his interrogation. In the end, it didn’t take much for Armstrong to flip on the supplier in the area, Damien Wilson. Shot caller for the G Park Lords. Turns out the threat of going back to prison because of a parole violation was too much for him, even if that meant snitching on known gangbangers.

Jay came out a while later to bring Hailey up to speed on the plan. 

“Voight and Antonio are going to head over with narcotics to make the bust as soon as they get the warrant. We’re trying to make a deal for Armstrong because of his cooperation, but guys got a bad wrap sheet. Might have to do some time again. Maybe put in protective custody after snitching on Wilson, bold move. Especially since this is probably going to trial.”

Hailey shrugged her shoulders, she never understood the ‘street code’, mentality of some of these kids. All of this, to lose your whole life over what… drug territory. And whatever half assed notion of loyalty these gang members had for one another. It made her sick, all the promising lives and futures lost, wasted. 

They got out of the district at a semi-reasonable time, the sun shining brightly, the cold snap was broken. 

“I don’t want to jinx it, but spring is definitely coming”, Hailey said as she closed her eyes to soak up the sun. 

“Ugh, Hailey. You know we’re going to get more snow now. Can’t believe you just said that”, Jay shook his head jokingly. “Hey you want to grab a beer?”

She thought about it for a second, but there was something she needed to do. Her eyes met his and then looked away, “Sorry, not tonight. I’m actually going to go stop by Adam’s. See how he’s doing.”

Jay looked disappointed but quickly hid it. That was fair, she should probably spend some time with the guy she was actually dating, not all of her spare time with him. “Ya of course, no worries. Tell him I was asking for him”. 

They smiled at each other and gave one last glance before turning away and getting into their separate cars to head home for the night. 

Jay gripped his steering wheel, deep in thought on his drive home. Hailey confused him. Sometimes he felt the huge spark and emotional connection between them and knew she was thinking the same. Other times, she was harder to read and he wasn’t sure if she shared the same feelings at all for him as he did for her. Whatever those feelings may be, he knew in his heart, and hers, that they were real. He’d follow her blind too. 

They were across town in different cars but they were both thinking the same thing, How could I let myself fall in love with another partner?

Hailey was trying to work up some courage at the wheel as she made her way over to Adam’s to finally have a conversation about their relationship status that was long overdue. She pulled up to his place, took a deep breath and knocked on the front door. He opened it and smiled when he saw her face, his arm no longer in a sling, his beard a bit longer than usual.

“Hi darlin, this is a nice surprise, come on in.”

Hailey gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and a soft hug, making sure not to touch his bad shoulder.

“Hey, got out early tonight so I thought it would be nice to come for a visit. How’s your shoulder?”

“A lot better, thanks. I saw Rhodes this morning, cleared me for driving and light duties. I’ll need some physio, but should be good to go in a week or two”, he replied.

“That’s good to hear. And listen, I’m really sorry I’ve been distant this week. These last few days…”, Hailey trailed off.

“Hailey, it’s okay. I totally understand. I’m sorry about the other night when I went off a bit about Halstead. Truth is I was just a bit jealous he was the one who got to take care of you, and not me. It was silly, he’s your partner, and I know you were there for him last week. Kim and Kev did the same for me”, Adam told her.

Hailey smiled on the outside, but on the inside she was a mess. She felt so guilty for leading Adam on this way, she wasn’t being honest with him, and that wasn’t fair. She was just about to open her mouth and let the truth spill out, and hopefully end this in a way where they could still be friends, when both hers and Adam’s phones started pinging like crazy. 

“Oh my God”, Hailey said quietly as she read the messages from Platt and Voight, she looked up, Adam a shade paler than normal after reading the same messages sent to his phone.

“Kim’s boyfriend…Blair…she just found him shot in an alley, barely hanging on…”, Hailey whispered, trying to process what just happened, she had messages coming in from Voight, Jay, Antonio. 

“We’re needed at the crime scene, Hailey we gotta go”, Adam said as he was busy grabbing his coat and putting on his shoes, staring at Hailey who was frozen in place.

“I’ll drive’, she came back to reality, glanced over at him and saw a strange look across his face, knowing that he wanted to get to Kim as soon as possible. 

Adam looked distraught the second they pulled up to the crime scene, they all did. He immediately rushed over to check on Kim, who looked like she was in shock, covered in Blair’s blood. They all listened sympathetically as Voight filled them in. Platt came over to break the news that Blair had died on his way to the hospital. An eerie silence fell over the team, as they all turned to Kim, taking their turns consoling her.

Hailey and Jay were in charge of sweeping Blair’s car for evidence. 

“Shit, Jay check this out”, she said as she found $20,000 in a duffle bag in the trunk.

“You know what that looks like”, he told her, knowing what she was thinking without having to say it out loud.

“I know, get Voight over here”, she said quietly, hoping that Blair wasn’t into anything shady, although it wasn’t looking good off the bat.

The team went back to the district to start working on leads for the case and spent most of the night there before agreeing to meet back up first thing in the morning. Adam had gone with Kevin to take Burgess home and make sure she was alright. Hailey didn’t mind, she understood the situation at hand. 

The next day things escalated quickly. After going with the drug lead, Hailey and Jay made their way over to a local church to look for the pastor, the last person to see Blair alive. When they arrived, they were surprised to see the place tossed. 

“Hailey, look”, Jay whispered as he pointed to a chair and a plant turned over near the back office, which had its door slightly ajar.

They proceeded with caution, guns drawn, with Hailey heading in first and Jay watching her back. They found the pastor bleeding out in his office, gun shot wound to the neck. Hailey radioed it in and immediately put pressure on the wound, in hopes he would make it long enough to tell them who shot him. Jay shook his head silently at her, he had seen way too many of these types of injuries. This guy wasn’t going to make it. 

Feeling like they hit a dead end, they headed back to the district, the truck ride a quiet one.

Over the next few days, significant progress was made it the case. Hailey had been partnered with Kim to talk to a roommate of Ray Price’s daughter. What they found out there shook them to the core. The team was disgusted as they watched the video of Price’s daughter, the pastor, and a friend who overdosed on some coke they just sold to her. 

“This was what Blair was after”, Kim said aloud. “He was going to use this to take down Price and make sure Kelton became Mayor.”

Hailey was stunned, she had no idea Price was capable of something like this. He was running for the Mayor of Chicago? How could he murder these two men in cold blood? None of it made sense.

Voight handled the confession with Price. Only he knew the truth. Ray was willing to protect his family at all costs, a mantra he was familiar with himself. The team was debriefed and filled in on the conclusion of the case, the conclusion Voight told them anyways. None of them were sure it was one hundred percent the truth, but closure was closure. Kim needed it more than anyone.

“How’s Kim doing with all of this?” Jay asked Hailey while giving her a lift home from work following the case wrap up.

“I’m not sure to be honest. It’s like she’s been on autopilot, I don’t think it’s sunk in yet. I feel really bad for her, I know they weren’t together long, but that’s an awful way to end things.” Jay nodded as Hailey spoke. “Adam and Kev are over at her place tonight. She’s going to need all of our support”, she said genuinely.

Jay thought there was an underlying tone of she’ll need Adam’s support, in there, but he decided not to push that subject. He’s been around in this unit longer than Hailey. Long enough to know the complicated and deep binding history between Kim and Adam. He wasn’t sure how Hailey felt about that, or if she really knew the whole story, but she did seem a bit relieved that Adam was with Burgess tonight, that in itself was telling.

She was pretty quiet the rest of the way home and when he pulled up to her place, Hailey looked at him with a big smile. 

“What?” He asked her curiously. 

“I’m going to get changed and then I’m going to swing by your place and pick you up in an hour, be ready, I have a surprise”, she said with a devilish grin.

“A surprise…hmmm. Okay. Does it involve beer?” He asked sceptically.

“It might. Just go with it, see you in an hour”, she yelled as she got out of his car and went inside to get ready for a night out. 

Jay shook his head….Hailey didn’t know what today was… or did she?

She showed up at his apartment an hour later and texted him to come down. 

“Hey. Where to?” He asked.

“You’ll see”, she said secretly.

“Molly’s?” 

“Nope. Any guess you make I’m still not going to tell you”, she said.

“Hmm okay, okay.”

They drove across town, to an area he wasn’t very familiar with. He was trying to think of all the places she could be taking him, but he was drawing a blank. It wasn’t until they were right outside when he finally clued in, Top Golf. He looked over at her from the corner of his eye and she was grinning from ear to ear at him. 

“Jay, you didn’t honestly think I would forget that today is your birthday, did you?”

His lips curled up into a smile as he looked down at his hands, then turned his gaze to her. “You didn’t say anything earlier, I wasn’t sure. There was a lot going on. Today was a blur, I kinda forgot myself. My birthday was never a huge celebration growing up or anything, didn’t want to make a big deal of it...”

She felt a familiar pain in her heart for him. The last few days, weeks even, had been pretty heavy. She wanted to make today special, even if he thought celebrating birthdays was silly. She knew he had a secret obsession with golf, it was his outlet and favourite thing to do once the weather got nice enough, the short window of the year it was in Chicago. They lucked out that today was a semi-nice spring day and they got out of work before sunset. Everything worked out timing wise, for once. 

“I’ve always wanted to go here! How do you know about this place? You don’t even golf”, he was so giddy she could tell as he checked out the facility. Driving ranges galore, Jay was like a kid in a candy shop. 

“I have two older brothers, they love this place. And I used to golf when I was younger because they were into it. Anything they did, I wanted to do. I’m a little rusty though, so you may have the advantage tonight”, she replied. 

He was touched. They both had a week from hell and she still took the time to plan something fun to do on his birthday. 

“Plus, I figured it would be some quality time together after a stressful week”, she smiled. 

He looked back at her, feeling that familiar spark between them, committing this moment to his memory. The complicated nature of their friendship, Hailey being with Adam, their mutual unspoken pact to never fall in love with another partner…none of that mattered for right now. Life often gets put on hold with their job. He was trying to live more in the present, and spend less time dwelling on the past. So little moments like this, when they come around, are important to cherish and celebrate. 

They enjoyed themselves at the driving range, laughing at the odd errant swing and miss, letting out some built up tension and temporarily forgetting the stress of the week. They both needed this. As their night came to a close and they were walking back to her car, Jay stopped and stared at her, desperate to communicate all the things he felt. She stared back at him, eager to learn more about what goes on inside of that head of his. 

All that came out was, “Thanks for tonight Hails, I had fun”, he said quietly with his hands in his pockets. He wasn’t sure why he felt like he was a nervous 16 year old kid on a first date with a cute girl, not knowing how to end off the night. This was obviously not a date, but to him, that same butterfly feeling was still there. She turned her body closer to his, and when she looked up at him, her eyes said it all. He slowly pulled her in and wrapped his arms around her in a hug, wanting this moment to last as long as possible.

“Happy Birthday Jay”, she replied as she smiled and buried the side of her face into his chest, her arms extending to reciprocate the tight grip he had around her body. Feeling like the world was standing still for a minute, they quietly lingered around her car, never expecting to have this moment together in a parking lot outside of Top Golf.


	14. Migraine

Chapter 14

Hailey really thought Jay was going to kiss her the other night, and she probably would have let him. She knew she was playing with fire, but didn’t seem to care. She had to get to Adam soon, or else things were going to get ugly, and she didn’t want that. It had been hard to find time alone with Adam over the last few weeks, their cases had been heavy. There was no time to focus on personal things, not for now anyways. She didn’t want Voight to think there was unnecessary drama within the unit, her emotions were clouding her judgment, or that her relationships were affecting her ability to be a good cop. As a female detective, she was used to having to prove herself, she couldn’t let herself fall into a stereotype, women are too emotional, all female cops sleep with their co-workers to get ahead… She had heard it all. But not this time. Her career was too important to her, and if it came to it, she would pick that over Adam. 

The team was heading out to do a raid on a counterfeit money operation, headed by the mob. Jay had been undercover for a few days with them now, pretending he was a friend of the bosses nephew, looking to get in on the scheme. In reality, this was one of his CI’s, Mike, who was looking to get a charge dropped. They were hoping they could pull this off without blowing Jay’s cover and Mike’s, everyone knew what happened to snitches in the mob, in jail or out on the streets. They had been waiting for the chance to get an in with this crew for ages, the mob was careful and rarely got caught. As much as it was hard to come to terms with, the mob had ties everywhere, including CPD. They saw an opportunity and took it, Jay volunteered to go under. No one had heard from Jay in a few day’s except for Voight, and Hailey was getting anxious, she wanted her partner back safe and sound. 

They were getting ready to breach the building when they heard gunshots.

“Shot’s fired, shot’s fired”, Burgess yelled. 

The team broke down the door, along with SWAT. “Chicago PD, put your hands up”, several of them yelled as they tried to round up the criminals, caught red handed with a bunch of counterfeit money sitting on tables in the abandoned warehouse. Their eyes were all darting around the room trying to locate Jay. 

Hailey and Ruzek quickly located where the gunshots came from. They made their way around the corner as they heard yelling. Hailey heard Jay’s voice and immediately felt her heart start racing. His CI Mike had been shot by another crew member, blood spilling out of his ears. Jay was next to him, trying to put pressure on the wound and reasoning with the other guy with the gun, pointing it at him now.

“You rat, you’re a cop”, the guy snarled at Jay, looking dangerously close to pulling the trigger.

Before he could get another word out, Ruzek fired his weapon without hesitation and took down the guy who was pointing his gun at Jay. Hailey let out a sigh of relief, knowing how close they cut it. She rushed over to Jay, who looked shaken, but physically okay.

“Hey, are you alright?” She said with panic and relief in her voice, kneeling down and checking him over to make sure he wasn’t shot anywhere. 

“Ya, I’m okay”, he sighed. “That was kind of close”, he looked at Ruzek, who signalled the gunman and Mike didn’t make it after checking them both for a pulse.

“Nice shot”, Jay said thankfully at Ruzek.

“Better to ask for forgiveness than permission right”, he flashed a smile back at Jay. “Looks like things got a little hairy in here huh.”

“You could say that”, Jay replied, accepting a hand from Ruzek to pull him up to his feet.

“Come on, let’s get out of here, get you cleaned up”, Hailey said as her and Ruzek walked Jay back to their car.

They returned to the district and changed out of their work clothes, Jay washing Mike’s blood off of him in the bathroom sink. He sat down on the benches in the locker room and took a deep breath. He got lost in his thoughts and tried to compartmentalize the last few days. 

Ruzek and Hailey were around the corner getting ready to head out for the night and saw Jay sitting motionless on the bench, hunched over staring aimlessly at the ground. Hailey looked to Adam, who silently nodded and motioned for her to go over to Jay. An unspoken approval to do their thing tonight. “I’ll call you later”, he whispered and kissed her on the forehead, heading out of the district. Hailey smiled and shut the door to her locker, grateful that Adam understood. 

“You okay?” She approached Jay slowly, his back was to her so she placed a hand on his shoulder. He jumped at her touch.

“Ya. Ya I’m fine”, once he looked and realized it was Hailey behind him. 

“Come on, let’s get out of here I’ll give you a ride home”, she said eyeing him up, he looked a little spooked.

“Then beers?” He asked.

“Of course. I need a drink, I think you do too”, she replied like there was any other option for the night.

They headed over to Jay’s place and found a spot out front. Hailey followed him up, she knew better than to wait in the car for him to get ready, she swore he took longer than her to get ready to go anywhere.

“I just have to jump in the shower quickly and change, make yourself at home”, he smiled.

Hailey rolled her eyes and plopped herself down on his couch, knowing she could probably squeeze in a full episode of a show with his track record. She heard a door open behind her and yelled, “Wow, that was quick, you…”, she stopped when she turned around and realized it was Will standing in front of her, not Jay.

“Hey Will, sorry didn’t realize you were home. Thought you were at work tonight”, she looked over curiously at him, his eyes were glazed and he seemed a bit disoriented.

“I was supposed to be. But this migraine had other plans for me today”, he said while rubbing his temples, eyes squinting closed.

Hailey immediately went to dim the lights, recognizing his symptoms. 

“My roommate in college used to get migraines a lot. They were horrible”, she told him as she went over to grab his arm to help him over to the couch.

“Mhmm”, was all he could say while trying to keep himself upright long enough to make it over to sit down. 

They sat in silence while he took a few slow breaths, hunched over holding his head in his hands. Hailey instinctively went to put a hand on his back, but held off. Her and Will were friends, but she wasn’t sure they were that close yet.

“I haven’t had a migraine since med school, thought I was finally in the clear. I got them all the time when I was younger”, he said after a few minutes. “Ugh this is terrible.”

“Do you have any medication for them?” She asked.

“No, unfortunately not. I’m passed that point anyways. But there is some Tylenol in the bathroom, do you mind grabbing me a few?” He asked looking defeated. 

She chuckled silently, “Of course not, I know where it is.”

He gave her a small grin, of course she did. 

“You know we really have to stop meeting like this Hailey. Jay and I are both young and full of life, tons of fun, I swear”, he told her with a grin. 

“Off couple of weeks I guess”, she said sympathetically.

“Jay?” She called out from the other side of the bathroom door, he was still in the shower, shocker.

“Ya, what’s up?” He called out.

“Will needs some Tylenol, he has a bad migraine, I’m coming in okay.”

She didn’t really wait for him to answer, it was less of a question, more of a statement. There was enough steam in the bathroom to cover up the fun stuff anyways. He poked his head out from the shower door a few seconds after she came in, “You find it?”

“Ya, all good”, she smiled coyly at him, he could have easily hid himself in the shower and waited for her to leave, but he opened the door on purpose, he wasn’t that discreet. He came out with his lower half covered in a towel, water still dripping down his chest and back, and his abs…

Hailey get a hold of yourself, nothing you haven’t seen before, she thought distractedly. He gently brushed past her to go back to his room.

“Take a picture, it’ll last longer”, he said jokingly. 

“Get outta here, put some clothes on Halstead”, she replied and swatted him away as he walked out the door. 

“I don’t know, I think you like what you see”, he replied cheekily. He knew he had her, she used his last name, she never does that. 

“I think having a gun pulled on you by one of Chicago’s most infamous mob crews and walking away unscathed really boosted your confidence today”, she chuckled, not giving in to his teasing. 

She brought some things out to Will who was looking like he was about to throw up at any moment. 

“Hey”, she snuck up next to him and placed a hand on his back, causing him to flinch.

“Here’s some water, take two of these”, she held out the pills in her hand. 

“Yes, Dr. Hailey”, he smiled weakly.

“I really should start charging you guys deductibles at this rate”, Hailey joked.

Jay came out into the living room, fully clothed this time, to find Hailey checking on Will. 

“Migraine?” He half-asked, half-stated as he approached the two of them on the couch. 

Will nodded his head slowly, desperate for the throbbing to stop. It was like someone was taking an ice pick to the side of his head, and his vision was cloudy. 

“Aww man, that’s rough. How long has it been since you had one?”

“A long time. I’ve been in bed all day, this is the first time I’ve been semi-vertical. I don’t think its agreeing with me”, Will replied quietly. 

Will finished his sentence and looked over to Jay, who could tell what was coming next by the look on his face, he knew that look too well.

“Oh no”, Jay said under his breath, Hailey looked confused.

Just as he said that, Will got up off the couch in a hurry and sprinted to the bathroom, emptying the contents of his stomach, not that there was much in there to begin with.

Hailey and Jay cringed at each other from the living room. 

“Poor thing”, Hailey whispered.

“He’s been all spun out from this weeks lockdown at the hospital, being held at gunpoint. Nat in harms way too…they’re not together but he still cares…, they were all shaken up. I don’t think he’s been sleeping well… too much coffee. The weather has been all over the place this week. All of his usual triggers”, Jay explained. 

“Gotcha. He doesn’t sound very well in there…” 

“Once he starts puking, he has a hard time stopping. This usually goes on for a while. Just fair warning”, he said cautioning her. Migraines were no joke. 

“We can stay in tonight. I don’t think it’s a good idea to leave him here by himself”, Hailey offered, sensing that Jay probably wouldn’t want to go out now. 

“Do you mind? I’m just nervous leaving him. It get’s really bad sometimes, like take him to the hospital for the pain bad”, he told her. 

“No of course, I’ll go out and grab us something for dinner”, she said checking her watch for the time. It was only 5 so she had plenty of time to whip something up. Maybe a homemade meal is what they all needed. 

“Thanks Hailey, I’m going to head in there to see how he is, wish me luck”, Jay said while raising his eyebrows.

Hailey left to walk down to the Whole Foods around the corner from Jay’s place. She loved cooking, it was her happy place. She spent some time wandering the aisles, there was something about grocery shopping alone that she enjoyed. She picked up some chicken and veggies for dinner, Jay already had some things in his fridge that she needed for her recipe. She also planned on making some soup for Will, in case he wanted something later that was easy on his stomach. 

By the time she got back to his place, the sun was just starting to set. She opened the front door and saw the living room in darkness. All she could see was the light shining from the bathroom, door slightly cracked, and Jay’s voice mumbling something softly to Will. She opened the door quietly and saw Jay sitting down next to Will on the floor, who was sitting up with his knees pulled against his chest, his head resting on his arms like it was too heavy for his body. Jay had set a damp washcloth at the base of Will’s neck, and had a hand on his back, rubbing it gently, “It’s okay man. This will pass soon.”

Hailey smiled softly as Jay turned and realized she was standing in the doorway watching them. He smiled back, and motioned for her to come in.

She knelt down on the other side of Will, also placing a hand on his back. 

“Hey Will, what can we do to help?” She said softly. 

Jay answered for him, “Can you go grab an ice pack from the freezer, I’m going to try and get him back into bed.” He was hopeful the puking was finished for now. 

She nodded and left for the kitchen as Jay slowly pulled Will up and draped his arm over his shoulder to help him back to his room. All the while, Will had his hand covering his face, shielding it from the light. 

Hailey tip toed her way into Will’s dark room and placed the ice pack over his forehead and eyes while Jay pulled all the curtains closed. He groaned and let out a big sigh. 

“Sorry about this, you guys can go out if you want, I’ll be okay here, just need to sleep it off. The nausea is the worst part, I’m hoping its passed”, he said. 

Hailey and Jay both looked at each other, she responded for the two of them.

“Will it’s no trouble, really. You take care of people all day and night, let us take care of you for once okay?” She said as she tucked him under his blankets and set a glass of water on his bedside table. 

“If this whole detective thing doesn’t work out Hailey, I may call you next time we’re short on nurses in the ED”, Will joked.

“You know, you are not the first Halstead to tell me that this week”, she winked at Jay who grinned slyly at her. 

Jay watched on fondly, he liked the fact that Hailey took control of the situation, and that her and Will get on so well together. It was obvious that family was important to her. Him and Will had their ups and downs, especially the last few years with everything that happened with their parents, Jay going off to war, Will not being around…But they were attached at the hip when they were younger. Part of him longed to go back to that time, and do a bunch of things differently, those were simpler days. Life was precious, and too short, he knew the true meaning of that now. He was hopeful that they could make up for lost time. They were the only family each other had left now.

“You alright? We’ll just be in the next room if you need anything okay”, she whispered as Will gave her a thumbs up, and her and Jay quietly closed the door behind them. She thought back to her conversation with Will in her kitchen last weekend, when he told her Jay was always the one looking after people. Maybe this is what he was referring to. She knew the two of them lost touch for a few years and weren’t very close, she was fuzzy on the details, but you would never know looking at them now. She had to admit it was cute watching Jay look after his older brother, so gently, and knowing just what to do to make him feel better. Jay had that quiet way about him, always knowing the right things to say and do when she was feeling down. 

“So what’s for dinner?” Jay asked when they were out in the kitchen, poking his head in her shopping bags.

“Chicken, peppers, tomatoes, olives, feta, onions, potatoes, all the good stuff. I’m just going to throw everything in a pan and see what happens”, she said while unloading the food on his counter.

“That sounds good to me. Mmm I love feta”, he said while watching her unpack.

“And some key lime pie, because I feel like we deserve a treat tonight”, she said, pulling one last surprise out of the shopping bag. 

“I like the way you think. Do you need help?” He asked.

“I should be alright….Actually you can chop some veggies. I was going to put some soup on for Will too, in case he’s hungry later.”

Jay looked at her sceptically. 

“What?” She laughed as she noticed him staring at her.

“I’m beginning to think Will is your favourite Halstead. Just remember all the times I saved you from bullets when you’re passing out dessert okay?”

Hailey laughed, “Am I sensing some jealousy Jay?”

He pretended to hide his hurt. “Maybe a little.”

“Don’t worry, you’ll always be my favourite”, she said reassuring him, talking about a little bit more than home cooking. 

He glanced over at her and smirked as he helped her prepare dinner. This was becoming a bit of a habit for them, one he was fond of. The routine of familiarity and normalcy was nice for a change, it made him feel like he had it together. It made it feel like his house was a home, and that he wasn’t just a 30 something bachelor living with his adult brother, surviving off of TV dinners.

They cracked open a bottle of wine and sipped it while making their food. Hailey had everything together in no time. Jay considered himself a decent cook, but she made him look like a novice. He helped her by setting the table and pouring her another glass of red. He decided at the last minute to light the candle sitting on his kitchen table, one that was just randomly used for decoration. He wasn’t even sure where it came from. 

“Now you’re talking”, she said as she brought him over a plate. When she noticed the candle she raised an eyebrow and looked at Jay, who gave her a curious look back.

“Well, well, well. What do we have here.”

“Halstead, reservation for two”, he pretended to be a hostess, with a napkin tossed over his arm, pulling out her chair for her to sit.

Hailey burst out laughing and rolled her eyes, thankful that he made a joke instead of making things weird. Anyone who walked in right now would assume they were having a romantic night in. Homemade dinner, candles, wine, dark room… her mind floated elsewhere.

“So, are we going to talk about today?” She asked him, breaking their silence as they ate. She could see that something was still bothering him. 

Jay looked up at her, unsure if he was willing to tell her what actually happened, but tried to explain the best he could. 

“The crew made me, even before you stormed in. You found us around the corner because Mike was trying to get me out, he knew what was going to happen to him. If it wasn’t for him trying to get me out safely…he wouldn’t be dead” Jay trailed off and played with the food on his plate. 

Hailey looked at him sympathetically, understanding why he was upset. Why he sat in the locker room staring at the blood on his hand’s…literally. 

“But then you might not be here Jay. You can’t think like that. The what if’s. It will eat you alive. What happened with Mike was unfortunate, but his last act was one of courage and bravery, towards you. He chose that. Try to remember him that way. I’m thankful that you’re still here”, she confessed.

“Thanks”, he looked up at her and smiled weakly. 

“There, doesn’t that feel better?”

“What feels better?”

“Letting it out, not holding things in. Talking about it so we can go to work and do our job tomorrow.”

“Ya it does. This is delicious by the way”, he said changing the subject.

“All those years growing up in my parents Greek restaurant paid off I guess.”

“You can say that again.”

They finished dinner, had dessert, talked for a while and played a few rounds of Scrabble before turning on a movie. About halfway through, they heard Will resurface from his bedroom, looking a little better after a nap, the colour was back in his face anyways.

“I’m alive”, he said while slowly making his way over to the couch. 

“Barely”, Jay replied, not buying that he was feeling one hundred percent. His guess was that he smelled Hailey’s cooking and rallied himself.

“Here Will, sit down, you hungry? I made you some soup”, Hailey asked as she got up from the couch to make room. 

“I can get it Hailey”, Will said, before she pushed his shoulder back down to sit.

“You’re just as stubborn as your brother, I’ll get it.”

Will smiled. “You should have met our dad, he would have liked you.”

Jay’s eyes flashed to Hailey’s and he let out a small smile. She returned it.

Hailey brought over a bowl of soup and a tea and sat down on the other end of the couch next to Jay. “You alright?”

“I’ll be fine. Headache is still there but not as bad anymore, just a dull pain. Feeling a little foggy but tomorrow will be a new day. If this is anything like the last batch, I’ll be better in no time”, Will said optimistically.

“Hailey for real, can you come over for dinner every night? If anything is going to bring me back from my deathbed it might be this”, he said sipping the soup happily.

Jay rolled his eyes, Will was egging him on just as much as he was playing with Hailey. 

“I was on my deathbed the other week and Hailey didn’t even prepare this kind of feast for me Will”, Jay said trying to stir the pot.

“Hey! She said hitting him arm playfully. I made soup for you when you were sick. Will is just my favourite Halstead, so what can I say”, she gave him a funny side eye.

“I know, I know I was just kidding. You took good care of me. Domestic looks good on you”, he said with a devilish grin. 

Will noticed their eyes connecting again, speaking in their secret language. 

“Wise choice Hailey”, Will said stifling a laugh. 

He continued to eat, silently watching the two of them interact again, their body language screamed comfortable. It suddenly dawned on him, who Hailey reminded him of, he was trying to put his finger on it for weeks now. Her quirkiness, how caring she was, her strong, independent, but soft underneath demeanour…she was so like their mom. He would never tell Jay that, in fear he might lose it on him, but deep down somewhere he probably thought the same. He smiled into his soup bowl, memories of happier times overtaking him.

Hailey excused herself not long after, calling an Uber as she had far too much wine to drive. 

“I’ll drive your car tomorrow and pick you up before work”, Jay told her as she walked out the door. 

“Sounds good, see you in the morning. Night Will”, she said as she poked her head back in, Will waved back. 

“Night, thanks for this Hailey.”

Jay came back to sit on the couch, waiting for Will to comment on the nights events. 

“So red wine and candles huh”, Will smirked.

Jay rolled his eyes and said nothing except, “We were trying to keep the apartment as dark as possible to avoid your headache getting worse.” 

“Sorry I ruined your night out with Hailey though, for real. I appreciate you guys looking after me”, Will said genuinely. 

“It’s okay. I think this served me better than drowning my sorrows at Molly’s anyways”, Jay let it slip that he had a less than ideal day.

“Anything you want to talk about?” Will said.

“Not really, we already had our therapy session over dinner. I’m good”, Jay replied half jokingly half serious, Hailey wasn’t the only one who could read his mind.

They sat for a few minutes watching the rest of the movie before Will retreated to his room, leaving Jay to sit on the couch to ponder his thoughts. He couldn’t get what Ruzek said earlier out of his head…It’s better to ask for forgiveness than permission. He decided he was finally going to act on his feelings, once and for all.


	15. Come lie down

Chapter 15

Hailey looked down at her leg, wide-eyed, staring at the piece of glass that was lodged deep in the side of her thigh. Adam’s voice brought her back to reality.

“Hailey, your leg. You have to tie it off”, he whispered, while holding her leg, trying to stop the bleeding and keep the situation under control. 

“I’m okay, I’m okay. Pull it out”, she told him after assessing herself.

He looked at her in disbelief, “No Hailey, we have to wait. I don’t want to risk it. You could have hit an artery….you could bleed out.”

“Do it. We have to get Shaw. He doesn’t know I’m here with you, it’s our only shot.”

Adam didn’t like this, not at all. But he knew Hailey and she was going to go along with whatever plan she already had in her head, with or without his help. He pulled the glass out in one quick movement, watching her face as she tried to stifle a scream. She took a deep breathe in and collected herself. 

“Okay, keep him talking”, she said as he helped her up and stood behind him in the doorframe.

The next few minutes felt like an hour, waiting for the right opportunity to ambush Shaw and save his hostage from getting her head blown off. Jay made his way up the stairs as Adam signalled to the room down the hall. Hailey followed him, blood seeping through her jeans. 

Jay was in position across the hall before he noticed Hailey’s leg. He too went wide-eyed seeing her DIY tourniquet, trying to keep his mind in Chicago, not elsewhere. Hailey saw this happening on his face as she watched him turn pale. She gave him a reassuring look from across the hall to tell him she was fine. She felt guilty for reminding him of his time overseas where he no doubt saw and had to apply tourniquets similar to this one. But they had a job to do and she couldn’t let him get distracted, there was time for talking after. He pulled himself together and motioned for her to find something to cause a distraction for Shaw so that they could breach the room. Jay had a clear view in from a mirror in the bathroom, and they were running out of time, Shaw was getting antsy. They didn’t need words, hand signals and eye movements were enough. Jay trusted Hailey and knew she understood what he was asking her, so he holstered his gun in preparation for some good old fashioned hand to hand combat. Hailey and Adam would have his back. 

Their plan worked and the three of them were able to arrest Shaw and keep Gina safe. Once outside, Adam made sure Gina was alright and agreed to take her to see her husband, reluctantly. He looked around for Hailey who was being treated by the medics. He saw Jay standing by her in the ambulance and figured she was in good hands. They would catch up later on at the district. 

Jay was pale, probably paler than Hailey was, and she was the one who just lost a ton of blood. He was just staring at her silently, watching the paramedics clean up her leg. While everyone was staring at Hailey, she was keeping a watchful eye on Jay, who looked nervous. 

“I’m okay Jay”, she told him, he was still silent. He paused and took a deep breathe, instantly switching moods.

“That was stupid pulling the glass out in there Hailey. What if that hit an artery? You could have bled out”, his nervous look turned to one of anger, which confused her at first. But, anger was his defence mechanism, she knew that better than anyone.

“I’m not really in the mood for a lecture Jay. We got Shaw. I did what I had to do”, she replied curtly. She regretted it when she saw the anger disappear from his face and was replaced with fear.

“You should go to the hospital, just to make sure everything’s okay”, he said flatly.

“Jay I’m good, the paramedics just cleared me.” Sylvie Brett was in the back of the ambulance and poked her head out to speak to Jay.

“She’s okay Jay. It didn’t hit anything major. No stitches either. The tourniquet did it’s job”, Sylvie told him, trying to also reassure him, she noticed how spooked he was. 

“Please Hailey. You don’t have to go in the ambulance. Let me take you and let Will look. Please”, he pleaded with her.

She could see his hands trembling and his bottom lip starting to quiver, his voice was calm but quiet. She figured this was just a reaction to the stress of the situation, she knew deep down he knew she was fine. But for some reason there was this nagging need to double check. Maybe something happened to him in Afghanistan, or to a friend, and something was missed. She shuddered.

Brett thought Hailey was going to object again, she knew her injury wasn’t serious. But Jay seemed pretty insistent, for whatever reason. 

Hailey put a hand on Jay’s shoulder, who had his arms crossed and was still looking down at his feet. 

“Okay, let’s go”, she said softly, agreeing to his request. She knew it was more than the cut on her leg.

He looked up at her, biting his lip to keep the emotion from overtaking his face, and nodded silently. He grabbed her hand to help her off the back of the ambulance and thanked Sylvie. Hailey also looked back at the blonde paramedic and smiled. Sylvie was confused, Hailey was totally fine, she’d be a bit sore but nothing too serious. But by the look on Jay’s face, she figured it was something much deeper than that. Something that Hailey understood without him having to explain, that’s why she gave in to him. 

They walked over to his truck in silence. He opened the door for her and helped her in, keeping a close eye on her leg, Hailey said nothing. She knew something was bothering him about this, more so than her getting hurt, and she wasn’t about to be the first to bring it up. It wasn’t until they were parked at Med when Jay spoke. It was quiet at first, she could barely hear him. 

“That’s how my friend Nate died.”

Hailey looked over at him curiously. He had mentioned Nate here and there a couple times, always funny stories. She knew he had passed away, but never really prodded for the details.

Jay cleared his throat to try and get the words out clearly. His voice was shaky this time. “That’s how my friend Nate died. The scar on my collarbone you saw…. It’s from the time our humvee drove over an IED, you remember?”

Hailey nodded and watched jaw clench and his face scrunch up, this was clearly difficult for him to talk about. 

“Well I was one of the lucky ones. A piece of metal tore through Nate’s leg. He didn’t say anything at first. He was just trying to make sure the rest of us were okay…”, Jay trailed off and looked down. 

Hailey grabbed his hand and tightly squeezed it, trying to give him the strength to tell her.

“He did what you did. He pulled the metal out, tied his belt around his leg, his left leg too, like you. I think he must have been in shock. Nate was smart, he would have never made a mistake like that…he had to have known it hit his femoral…”, Jay’s voice was getting quieter and quieter as the story went on. 

“But he was also stubborn. We were his team, his friends. It was his responsibility to keep us safe. Like it’s my responsibility to keep you safe”, he said as tears started to well up in the corners of his eyes.

Hailey knew where this was going. She felt for him, she really did. No matter how irrational he knew he was being about her leg, there was this voice in the back of his head telling him that she wasn’t out of the woods. That it could just be the adrenaline, and she could slip away right in front of his eyes.

“By the time a few others who weren’t seriously injured came to and realized he was in worse shape than he said he was, it was too late. Nate bled out, right there in front of me. I held his hand until it was over. Our tour was going to be done in less than a week, we were all going home”, Jay’s voice broke and a sob came out instead.

Hailey still hadn’t said a word, she knew Jay needed to let this out, so she listened. But she still kept a firm grasp on his hand. For whatever reason, this random, somewhat meaningless thing that happened to her triggered this enormous, unimaginable pain that Jay had been holding onto for who knows how many years.

She unbuckled her seat belt and lifted the center console so she could slide closer to him. She could see his breathing getting more rapid as a few tears rolled down his cheeks, but it slowed once she put her arm around his shoulder and pulled him into her chest. 

“I’m sorry Jay. I’m so sorry”, she whispered as she rubbed his back with one hand, and held his head in the other. She waited for him to cry it out. 

Ten minutes had passed before Jay sat up again. 

“I know how hard that was for you to share that story Jay. Thank you for telling me”, she whispered.

“I’m sorry I snapped back at the scene. I just…I saw your leg…and I got worried. I want to make sure you’re okay”, he replied.

“I know”, she said rubbing his arm, knowing his anger earlier was really only misplaced grief, and maybe a bit of guilt. 

“Come on, let’s go get you checked out”, he said after he calmed down. He got out of the truck and came around to open her door and give her an arm to lean on. Even though she could walk fine on her own, she let him help her, knowing that this is just something that he needed to do. 

They went into the ED, and Jay asked Maggie to page Will. Maggie looked at Hailey, who had a bandage over her leg, and immediately looked concerned. 

“What happened? You two okay?” She asked.

“Ya we’re okay”, Hailey answered for Jay, who was still struggling to get his words out. 

Hailey had her leg propped up on the bed when Will pulled the curtain back. Jay had been pacing around, hospitals still made him anxious even if he wasn’t the one being treated. It didn’t take long for Will to piece together why they were here. He glanced down at Hailey’s leg and then to Jay pacing around the room, not making eye contact with him. Judging by the look on Will’s face, Hailey knew that he knew what was wrong. Will quickly put a smile on his face to try and hide the nervousness that he felt for his brother, knowing this must have been extremely hard.

“Well if it isn’t my favourite Detectives”, Will said trying to make some light-hearted commentary, the vibes in this room felt tense. 

Hailey smiled at him, “Twice in one week Will. Did we just become best friends?”

That even got a laugh out of Jay. Will was thankful at least one half of the partnership was in good spirits, oddly enough it was the one who just had a glass shard stuck in her leg.

“So what happened?”

“Um, back at this house. We were closing in on an offender and he open fired…I think a picture frame in the hallway broke and that’s where the glass in my leg came from. But I’m not really sure to be honest.” Hailey tried to keep the details of the operation somewhat casual, she didn’t want to frighten Will, or Jay, about what actually went down. 

Jay spoke up for the first time, almost a robotic response, strictly facts. He looked detached.

“Hailey and Adam made a tourniquet, pulled the glass out of her thigh and kept moving. Paramedics checked her out at the scene and said she was good. But I brought her here just in case anything was missed.”

Will looked to Hailey, who was playing along, even though he knew it was Jay who probably forced her here. 

“Okay, well get a gown on and let me take a look. There could be smaller fragments still in your leg. It was glass you said? Not metal? I may give you a tetanus shot and some antibiotics, just to be safe”, he said to Hailey while looking at Jay. 

“Sounds good, thanks Will”, Hailey didn’t even put up a fight, which made Will even more curious. Jay must have told her about Nate. He talked about him in his sleep all the time.

Jay and Will left the room to give her some privacy to change. Will turned and put a hand on Jay’s shoulder.

“You alright?”

Jay looked at him and nodded, “Ya I’m good. Just want to make sure she’s okay.” He didn’t elaborate and Will didn’t push any further, even though he didn’t buy that Jay was all good. 

Back in the room, Will looked at Hailey’s leg a little closer and assured the both of them that there was no glass in there. He added a few steri-strips to close the cut. 

“Okay Hailey, I’m writing you a short prescription for some antibiotics. Just to be on the safe side. Take these with food. Be careful not to get these too wet in the shower. It might hurt to walk for a few days, but other than that you are good to go.” 

“Thanks Will”, they both said as they got ready to head back to the district. 

“Make sure Jay has something to eat, he’s looking a little pale”, Will whispered to Hailey as they were waiting for Jay to pull his truck up to the ED doors. 

She nodded, “I’ll make sure he’s okay”, silently communicating what they were both concerned about. 

The drive back to the 21st wasn’t as heavy as the drive to Med. They talked about things and were good to move on from it. 

“You want a coffee?” Jay said as he saw one of their favourite spots up ahead.

“Yes please. I have a feeling this is going to be a long rest of the day. Muffins too?”, she smirked, asking for her own benefit but also his. 

Jay got out of the truck and went in to grab them coffee and a snack while Hailey sat thinking about the days events. As much as this whole thing with Jay and her leg was a distraction for a second, there was something she needed to do once they got back to work.

Her and Adam had not been on the same page this case, maybe not even reading the same book so to speak. While he was trying to do an undercover buy she let her emotions get the best of her and sabotaged it. She knew it wasn’t the right thing to do work wise, but personally it was, and that was a problem for her. Her moral compass pointed in a different directions than Adam’s a lot of the time, and that wasn’t working for them romantically. She thought back to the conversation she had with Platt about her relationship and dating within the unit. Platt was right, she had to follow her heart, but also think about her career while doing so. This afternoon was going to be difficult, maybe even more difficult than the last few hours. But it was time to rip the band-aid.

They pulled into the district and made their way upstairs. They went over the case with Voight, filed evidence and got their paperwork in order. Adam came over to her desk to make sure she was alright, which she insisted she was. Jay picked up some tension between them, but it was none of his business so he looked away. 

By the time they had everything wrapped up, Hailey snuck down to leave for the day. Adam followed her, knowing that they needed to clear the air from what happened today. 

“Do you want to come back to my place? We can talk this out”, Adam asked her.

Hailey bit her lip and hesitated, knowing that once she started talking, there was no going back.

“I think we should talk right now”, she said quietly.

With that reply, it was as if Adam knew. He looked hurt, but not completely caught off guard.

“Okay”, he said as he let out a sigh and closed the door for some privacy.

“Adam I care about you. So much. But…”

“I know. I know you do. It’s hard being together and working together. These last few months have been fun”, he said softly. 

“Ya they have.” Hailey paused.

“But it’s more than that, isn’t it?”, she said trying to hold back tears, both of them understanding the loaded meaning behind what she was really trying to say. 

“Ya. Ya it is. Hailey I get it, really. I do. When we first started hooking up, you asked me about Burgess. But I never asked you about Jay….”

“Adam….”, Hailey tried to interrupt him and explain herself, that’s not what she wanted him to assume. That isn’t what this was about. But when she looked up at him, he wasn’t mad. He looked understanding.

“I’m not blind Hailey. I saw how you reacted when he got shot. I could hear it in your voice when you called for help and tried to keep him awake. And how you cried afterwards because you thought you lost him. I think I knew it then, but I definitely know it now. And that’s okay. I get it”, he looked close to tears himself, but needed to be honest with her. 

Hailey was silent, as much as she knew Adam wasn’t “the one”, this still hurt. She cared deeply about him, as a friend and more than that. At work and in her personal life. She let him continue. 

“We had too much to drink that night and things went how they did. I don’t think I took advantage of you and how you were feeling, at least I hope I didn’t, that was never my intention. But if it ever felt like that I’m sorry. I had fun, I care about you a lot too. I won’t lie, this hurts, and it will hurt for a while. But things will be okay. Nothing is going to change on the work or friendship front okay? I don’t want you to feel like it should. We are all adults and I would rather have you in my life as friend than not have you in my life at all. This unit is my family, that includes you, and Jay too”, he let out a sigh as he finished his rant. By the sounds of his speech, it sounded like maybe he had a heart to heart with Platt as well.

“Thank you for these last few months. I had fun with you Adam, you didn’t take advantage of me. I never want you to think that. Ultimately I just don’t think we’re on the same page. And that’s okay”, she smiled through the tears she was holding in.

“And Adam….I’m not blind either. If Kim is who you want to spend your life with, go after her. It might not seem like it right now, but for what it’s worth, I think you guys are meant to be, and will find your way back to each other”, she added softly. 

He looked at her intensely, let out a small grin, and nodded at her before pulling her into a long hug. They stayed like that for a few minutes, soaking in their last few minutes together before having to face the reality of their situation. She felt sad, but also relieved. 

“What a day huh”, Adam said after gently letting her out of his embrace.

“Ya, it was”, Hailey shook her head and gave him one last smile and nod. 

They went their separate ways, unsure what the future was going to hold, for any of them.

It was late, and Hailey was sitting alone on her couch drinking and watching TV when she heard a soft knock at her door. She got up to answer, already knowing who would be on the other side.

Jay smiled as she opened the door, but stopped when he could see that Hailey had been crying.

“Everything okay?” He asked, his expression softening. 

She took a sharp breathe in and blurted out what happened after work.

“Adam and I broke up tonight”, she said bluntly. 

Jay looked taken aback, a little bit tongue tied perhaps. She thought she saw the slight hint of a grin hiding in his eyes.

“Oh. Um, sorry Hailey. Sorry to hear that”, he stammered.

“It’s okay. It was time to call it”, she said calmly.

“Well, I’m glad I brought this then”, he said as he pulled a nice bottle of tequila out from behind his back, slowly smiling. 

She smiled and opened the door, inviting him inside. 

“Wait, actually aren’t you not supposed to drink? The antibiotics?” Jay said suspiciously.

Hailey didn’t have the heart to tell him that she wasn’t going to take them. That it was fear over logic acting earlier. Will gave her a bogus prescription just to calm Jay down, but she was prepared for this.

“I haven’t started them yet. I was highly anticipating you showing up on my doorstep tonight with a bottle of something so I held off”, she smirked.

“Right. Well, better put it to use then”, he cracked the bottle and poured them each a drink. 

They sat on the couch, enjoying the tequila before either of them spoke. Hailey announcing her break-up threw Jay off. He had worked himself up to come over here and be honest with her about his feelings and see where that conversation went and now he wasn’t so sure. Which was ironic because he was willing to say that while she was still with Adam, but suddenly now he felt scared to tell her. Like him telling her this now that she was single made everything seem more real. He was doubting himself, something he didn’t typically do. 

She must have noticed him daydreaming because she called out, “Earth to Jay”, and laughed.

He grinned back, hoping she didn’t notice why he was acting weird. 

“Do you want to talk about Adam?” He asked her.

“Not really. It was fun, but things weren’t going to work out in the long run. Better to quit while we were ahead. You know how it is, romance at work is hard to balance”, she added.

“Ya I get it”, Jay replied. Now he was really nervous about eventually coming clean with his feelings. Knowing that Hailey was hesitant to date co-workers. Maybe it was better for both of them to bury things for now. 

She looked at him, her eyes probing his body language. He seemed uptight about something, but maybe it was about what happened earlier. She wasn’t sure if she should bring that up again or she may be rocking him to sleep later.

“Jay, about earlier….I want to make sure you’re okay”, she said cautiously.

He shot her a quick side glance and nodded slowly. 

“I’m okay Hailey. Thanks. I freaked out for no reason, I know it was silly…”

“It wasn’t silly Jay”, she said as she shook her head while reaching out to grab his arm. “I didn’t understand at first, but now I do. You can trust me, you know I’ll always have your back.”

“I know. You’re probably the person I trust most”, he reciprocated by putting his other hand on hers, that was the most he was willing to admit for tonight. 

That made her smile, Jay was her best friend, and potentially more than that. After everything that happened today, that was the only thing she was sure of. Somehow, she knew that if her and Jay were ever to get together it would be different. She wouldn’t feel like she was jeopardizing or sacrificing anything by being with him, career or otherwise. Maybe he felt the same way too. 

Before they knew it they had polished off half the bottle of tequila Jay brought and then some, both feeling quite drunk. They had played some cards and talked a bit more before Hailey went off to bed. Jay took his place on the couch and felt his eyelids get heavy. Tequila usually has that affect.

She went up to bed and passed out, her leg starting to feel a bit stiff. 

She woke up a few hours later, to the sound of Jay’s silent cries coming from her living room. She got up from her bed to go check on him. By the time she was around the corner, it looked like he had calmed himself down. He was sitting upright, trying to take deep breaths.

“Jay?” She said quietly, announcing her presence so that she wouldn’t startle him by sneaking up behind him.

He turned around to face her, she noticed his pale face and hands trembling again. So she made a split second decision so that they both could get some sleep. 

She held out her hand, encouraging him to grab it. He looked at her confused.

“Come on, come lie down”, she whispered.

He raised his eyebrow at her, it was one thing for Hailey to sleep in his bed. But her inviting him into hers felt like a different story. She sensed his hesitation and smiled. 

“I don’t have cooties, no funny business either”, she tried to say with a straight face. 

He laughed at that and shook his head, pulling himself up off the couch to follow her upstairs.

He got settled in her room, realizing it was felt strange because he had never really been in here before. Hailey pulled the blanket back to crawl in next to him. Maybe it was the tequila or the series of events that unfolded today, but she felt comforted by Jay laying next to her. He reached out to find her hand as he was fighting to keep his eyes open, knowing that he was safe as long as he was holding her hand.

It took Jay all of 30 seconds or so to fall back asleep, Hailey smiled because she knew that’s all he wanted. Was to feel safe, and free from the nightmares. She would protect him as best as she could. 

The team made several comments today about how Gina’s husband had made a huge sacrifice in order to try and keep her alive. But all Hailey could think about while she watched Jay’s chest rise and fall as he slept was that no one would ever know the full extent of the sacrifices that he’s made, no one but her.


	16. Kidnapped

Chapter 16

They had only been up once during the night after Jay had come to sleep in her bed, well Hailey was up anyways. Jay slept pretty soundly for the most part. He started to get worked up only once before settling down. Hailey felt his body start to shake so she opened her eyes expecting the worst, but he wasn’t fully awake. She realized she had let go of his hand at some point so she quickly slipped it back under his, slid closer, reached over and ran her free hand down his back to calm him down.

“Shhh, shhh. You’re okay, shhhh”, she whispered softly to him for a few minutes, half asleep herself. 

He eventually stopped stirring and fell back into a peaceful sleep. Hailey kept her other hand wrapped around him, just in case. 

Jay was awake first, he always woke up at 6:00 am right on the dot, even without an alarm. One aspect of his army life that he held onto. Hailey was lying on her side facing him, and had him pulled into a strange distant hug, her arm wrapped around him, still holding onto one of his hands. Their foreheads were nearly touching, their feet tangled up under the blankets. He smiled, wondering how they made their way into this position overnight. He wanted to tease her about this when she woke up, so he stayed put.

An hour or so later Hailey opened her eyes slowly to find Jay’s staring back at her. He hadn’t moved an inch during the night, she still had her arm draped around him in a protective half hug. Somehow his arm had found it’s way around her waist as well. 

“Morning”, she said, suddenly very conscious of whether or not she had bad breath. Their faces were very close. 

“Morning”, he smiled back. 

“You sleep okay?” She asked.

“I slept great. Thanks”, he grinned. 

“That’s good”, she replied, hoping he didn’t remember waking up halfway through the night. 

“I can see why you’re such a deep sleeper now. Your bed is so comfortable”, he smirked.

So he didn’t remember, and if he did, he didn’t let on. Hailey laughed, “Ya it’s pretty nice. Don’t get too used to it”, she said sarcastically.

Jay smiled and rolled his eyes back, feeling like that was his signal to get up. He lifted her arm off his side and rolled out of bed to get ready for work.

“Do you mind if I jump in your shower quickly?” He asked.

“Go for it, towels are in the closet in there. I’m going to go put some coffee on”, she said. 

Jay got up too quickly, and remembered how much tequila they drank last night. “Oof”, he winced.

Hailey laughed, she was feeling about the same. “Headache?” 

“Ugh, ya a bit. Next time we’ll wait for a weekend to drink that much”, he laughed.

“Nothing a shower and a cup of coffee can’t fix”, she replied with a grin.

Hailey left him to get ready, she had showered last night before he came over. She was trying not to get her bandages wet. She briefly forgot her leg was cut until she also stood up out of bed for the first time and nearly fell over. She was glad Jay didn’t see that or else he would be trying to convince her to stay home for the day.

By the time he came down Hailey had made coffee and a bite to eat. She offered Jay some yogurt and granola but he turned his nose up at it. 

“Not sure food is a good idea right now”, he said cautiously thinking of his stomach.

Hailey chuckled, “Alright well try to eat something before we have to leave. We need to pull ourselves together here. We’re working on that human trafficking case today.” 

“How’s your leg?” Jay asked as he tried to take a peak, she was hiding behind the island on purpose.

“It’s okay. Little sore, but once I get moving I’ll be alright”, she lied.

He looked at her questioning how truthful she was really being. “Let me see.”

“Jay, it’s fine really…”

He got up and looked down, she was still wearing her pyjama short bottoms. It didn’t look too bad, but definitely not great. There was some bruising around the cut and it looked a little red.

He looked at her with his eyebrows raised, in an “I told you so”, kind of way.

“You know I used to think Will was the mother hen, but really it’s you isn’t it”, she replied to his stare.

That caused him to crack a smile, “You’ve got me all figured out Hails.”

He felt her forehead to make sure she didn’t have a fever, in case her leg was actually infected.

She gave him another sideways stare, reading his mind, “Jay, I don’t have a fever. It’s not infected. Just sore. I did have glass tear through here less than 24 hours ago remember.”

She saw his face sink a little at that comment, the words came out before she realized what she was saying. Of course he remembers Hailey, he had a panic attack about it afterwards. She felt stupid for saying that, it was obvious that her words stung him. 

She gently put her hand on his arm as a peace offering, “I’m sorry Jay. I didn’t mean to bring it up again. Thank you for your concern, I know you care. But everything is okay, I promise”, she said genuinely.

He looked up at her with a weak smile, “I know. Just checking.”

She got dressed for the day and before they knew it they had to leave for work. 

“I’ll drive today, my truck’s here anyways”, he said as they left her place.

Hailey hesitated and thought what Adam might think seeing her and Jay arrive to work together. But she shook her head, they did this all the time. Just because her and Adam broke up didn’t mean that anything has changed between her and Jay.

If Hailey was nervous about seeing Adam, she didn’t have time to think about it. They came upstairs to find everyone operating full steam ahead, and it was barely 9 am. Jay got pulled by Voight to do surveillance with Antonio. Atwater and Adam were interviewing a witness of what was a suspected kidnapping of a woman involved in the human trafficking ring. Kim and Hailey were looking into possible theories of how these women were being lured into Chicago. 

Later in the day, Kevin, Jay and Adam made an alarming discovery. The women who were being held captive and sold into prostitution and God knows what else, were being lured through dating websites and other social media platforms. They immediately ran to Hailey and Kim to explain the situation, they believed another girl was on her way here on a bus as they spoke. 

“Hailey, can you pull up the bus schedule? We found a girl named Taylor, she’s meeting up with Trevor downtown sometime this afternoon. Incoming bus from Madison, possibly arriving around 3. Call me with the details”, Adam quickly blurted out the details as he grabbed his coat to get to the bus station.

“Ya, you got it.” Hailey quickly went to work and found the route and bus number. The team moved in, but unfortunately they were too late. The bus arrived earlier than expected and they missed it by minutes.

“Ahhhh, dam it!” Adam yelled as he slammed his hand against the bus station pillar.

“It’s okay Adam. We’re going to find her. We know how he’s operating now, we have good leads”, Kim told him, trying to calm him down, she was frustrated too, they all were. 

They spent the whole night trying to track Trevor and the missing girl. Nothing. Radio silence. The team was dejected, nervous that this afternoon was their only chance and hope at finding Taylor alive.

Voight sent everyone home around 11. He needed them to be well rested for the next day, they had a feeling it would be a long one.

Everyone went their separate ways, Hailey and Jay included. She was in need for some alone time to reflect on what happened in the last few days.

The next few days were frustrating, their window of finding Taylor was closing rapidly. Long days were spent overturning every piece of evidence they could find, but still nothing. Several days had gone by, and the team was worn out and frustrated. Jay came in with bags under his eyes. It was obvious to Hailey that he wasn’t sleeping, but no one else seemed to clue in. Kim quickly ushered her into the lunch room, filling her in on their assignment for the day.

“Voight needs one of us to go under. Pretend to be interested in Trevor online, hopefully set up a hot date”, Kim mentioned.

“Makes sense. We are the best looking options in the unit”, Hailey laughed.

The women discussed their plan of action and came out to the bullpen to fill the team in. Jay and Adam shared some concerned glances at each other, the last time Kim and Hailey went undercover they got kidnapped and were nearly killed. But, they also knew them and regardless of their objections, they were going to do this anyways.

“Hailey, I don’t like this”, Jay told her when he had a minute alone with her.

“Jay. Kim and I have done this before. Sure the last time wasn’t great, but our track record is still solid. I spent a year undercover remember?” 

“I know. I know. But we’ve seen what this guy has done….especially with the women he couldn’t sell…”, Jay trailed off thinking about the discovery they made yesterday. They found Trevor’s hiding spot for the women he kidnapped. They were chained up in a dark cellar like animals, no food or water, pumped full of drugs, clearly signs of abuse. Two of the three girls they found didn’t make it. He couldn’t handle that happening to Hailey or Kim.

“Jay. Let us do our jobs, it’s going to be fine”, Hailey reassured him, slightly annoyed that he was doubting her abilities.

He nodded and walked away. Adam approached him afterwards. 

“What do you think of this? The two of them putting themselves at this kind of risk…”, Adam fished. He knew Hailey confided in Jay unlike she confided in anyone else. And Kim….he couldn’t live with himself if anything happened to her.

“I don’t know man. I don’t like this, but you know them. They aren’t going to let us tell them what to do. They want to catch Trevor just like we do. It might be our best shot.” Jay tried to be objective and see the bigger picture, but he was still worried about them.

Voight briefed the team, and after reviewing security tape from the bus station, it had to be Hailey going under. Trevor knew the police were tailing him, and it was obvious that he got a clear look at the members of Intelligence at the station. Kim was there, so it couldn’t be her. Trevor responded to Hailey’s profile and was willing to meet up later tonight. Atwater got Hailey wired up, trying to talk her out of it right up until the last minute. 

“Okay. Well last chance to change your mind.”

“Kev, I’m doing this, relax. You boys are all worked up for nothing, it’s just a date”, Hailey said eyeing the room with a smirk. Her and Kim nodded at one another. Adam looked on edge, Jay looked like he hadn’t slept in days. Kim made a mental note to ask Hailey about that later.

They all shared one last glance, and handed Hailey a set of keys for the car.

The date with Trevor was going well, but Jay was cringing hearing Hailey talk to him the way she was, he was such a scumbag. Everything was moving along according to plan, but things took a dark turn when Hailey excused herself to go to the bathroom. What happened next threw everyone off guard, things were escalating quickly. It was discreet, but at some point Trevor must have slipped something into Hailey’s drink. Hailey never came out of the bathroom. Trevor sat calmly at the table and paid for the cheque. Still no Hailey. Adam and Jay were in a van nearby and were starting to get nervous. 

“Where is she?” Kim whispered into a mic, she was sitting out front of the restaurant. 

“Back door, hurry Kim”, Jay replied, he had a bad feeling about this. 

Kim ran into the alley but it was too late, a black SUV was speeding away. It was too far away to get any plates off of it. Trevor and Hailey were in the wind.   
Adam saw the torment in Jay’s eyes. He didn’t really understand the relationship between the two of them, but regardless of that, Hailey was Jay’s partner. 

“It’s okay man. We’re going to find her. She’s going to be okay”, Adam said reassuringly.

“Adam he DRUGGED her, she’s going to be out of it. He’s going to find her wire, she’s most likely unconscious already. You saw what he did to those other girls man. If he lays a finger on her I swear to God…”, Jay was fuming, he was having flashbacks to when they were kidnapped a few months ago. He was holding his head in his hands, trying to keep it together. Adam cringed, and was understanding of his concern. A very guilty part of him was relieved it wasn’t Kim.

Speak of the devil, Kim stormed the back of the van. 

“What the hell you guys! You were supposed to be watching. Where did he take her?” It was her turn to be mad. 

Adam watched as Jay tried to hold in his anger, it wasn’t Kim’s fault. But it wasn’t entirely on them either, things happened quickly. 

“Kim, it happened fast. We didn’t have anyone out back yet. Sorry”, Adam told her. 

“He had to have had help in there. Hailey probably went to the bathroom because she knew something was wrong. Someone must have been waiting for her to throw her in the getaway car. Get Atwater on the phone now. We need to check traffic camera’s. I’m going after that car”, Jay said angrily as he stormed out of the surveillance van.

Adam let him go, and knew he would react the same if it was Kim. Then it really dawned on him, I would react the exact same if this was Kim. Jay was in love with Hailey, how could he have not seen this before. Adam had his suspicions about Hailey having feelings for Jay, but he wasn’t really sure if Jay was on the same page entirely, or if it was anything more than a crush. He slipped up, he was tired and irritable. Jay was usually the king of keeping his feelings tight to the vest. But that outburst was telling. Adam wasn’t mad, but wow. He wondered if Hailey knew. 

The next few hours were critical, and for Jay, also unbearable. They called Voight and told him the date went sideways, Hailey had been taken. They got the security cameras from the restaurant and the hair on Jay’s arms stood up when he watched it. The waiter. Of all people, they never expected a waiter at this restaurant to be in on such a sinister operation. But that made a lot of sense, the waiter drugged their drinks, the unsuspecting women would get up to go to the bathroom, likely aware something was off. By the time they walked down the hall, the waiter followed them and instead of helping them, he would gag them and push them out an employee door to a waiting vehicle. This guy was smooth. They didn’t even consider this as part of the plan. Kim looked horrified, realizing that could have been her, and also out of fear for Hailey. It had been 4 hours now. Adam and Kev looked like they were going to be sick, Jay had a stoic look on his face. But they all knew the anger was bubbling on the inside. 

By the time they tracked the SUV, it had been abandoned in a parking lot in the South Side. No signs of Hailey…..until Jay spotted a sparkle in the dirt behind the back of the vehicle. His heart sank, it was Hailey’s bracelet, the one her mother gave her. Adam ran over seeing Jay pick something up off the ground.

“You find something?” He was out of breath. By this time Atwater and Kim had joined him too. Jay couldn’t speak, he just held up the bracelet, looking sullen. Kim let out a sigh and put a hand on Jay’s arm, she recognized it too. Hailey loved that thing, she wouldn’t have just thrown it away like this. 

“What do we do now?” Adam asked quietly, Atwater was calling in forensics to see if they could find any clues in the SUV.

“There’s no way she would have given that up voluntarily, that bracelet is important to her”, Kim said, thinking the worst.

Then something clicked in Jay’s head, he looked at the clasp, it was broken again.

“Yes she would have. Look at the clasp, it looks like it’s been ripped off. I doubt Trevor would have even noticed she was wearing this, and you wouldn’t know it was valuable looking at it.”

“Why would she have done that though?” Adam asked curiously, watching the wheels spin in Jay’s head.

“A few months ago she lost this, I found it in my truck and was going to have it fixed as a surprise. Long story short I got sick, forgot about it, she ended up going to get it fixed herself.”

“Okay….”, they said, not really following his train of thought. 

“She broke it in the exact same place again. It’s like she did it on purpose, she knew we would find this”, Jay looked around like this was the most obvious thing in the world, but then again he had a deeper understanding of how Hailey’s brain worked.

Kim got it, “So you think she’s leaving us breadcrumbs?”

“Exactly. I know the place she got it fixed. Italian jeweller. That restaurant they were just at….Italian owners right? She mentioned she got some weird vibes from the place.” Jay said trying to piece this theory together out loud.

“Maybe there’s a connection?” Adam offered.

“There has to be. She wouldn’t have done this otherwise I’m sure of it.” Jay said.

It wasn’t a lot to go off of, but it was worth a shot. Atwater got on the phone explaining the situation to Voight and Antonio who were back at the station. Antonio called him back within a few minutes. 

“Jay might be onto something. The owner of the jewellery store also is part owner at the restaurant…he has a son. Matches the name and description of our waiter. Waiting on confirmation from the restaurant that this is the same guy. He did a stint in Cook County for assault last year. And get this, Trevor and the waiter were friends in high school.”

They all looked at each other, that was all the confirmation they needed, and raced over to the jewellery store, hoping they would find her there. 

Jay and Kim took the back while Ruzek and Atwater covered the front. It was late, they needed to find Hailey tonight. Jay’s anxiety was at an all time high. Kim could probably hear his heart beating through her ear piece. The four of them searched the jewellery store, but no sign of Hailey. They were devastated…..until they heard faint voices. They fanned out and found a hidden trap door leading to a cellar in the back office. Jay and Adam nodded at one another, Jay moved in, turning his radio and flashlight off.

He heard Trevor and the other guy’s voices first, they were talking about what to do. 

“She’s a cop Trevor! They’re going to be all over us soon”, the waiter sounded nervous.

“They have no idea where we are, none. Dumb pigs.”

As soon as he said that, Jay and Adam pounced out from the darkness. 

“Chicago PD, drop your weapons! Let me see your hands!” Adam yelled.

The waiter complied, he looked terrified, clearly this was not part of the plan. But Trevor smirked. Their eyes went to the corner and saw a tied up, unconscious Hailey. Trevor had a knife in his hand already and made a run for the corner. Before he even took a step, Jay shot him square in the knee cap. He fell to the ground writhing in pain, and Jay shot the other knee cap just for good measure. Adam turned a blind eye.

“Woops”, Adam said to Jay sarcastically as they flipped Trevor on his stomach.

He was yelling and screaming that he was going to sue, until Jay cocked his gun and put it on the back of Trevor’s head. That shut him up real quick. 

“Give me a reason”, he said coldly. Adam motioned that he would take over for Jay.

“Go get Hailey”, he said.  
Jay ran over to the corner and felt her pulse, it was strong. He let out a sigh of relief. In addition to that, her clothes seemed to be in place, nothing amiss there. 

She came to when she heard voices. Jay was working on untying her hands. “Jay, is she alright?” Adam yelled.

“Hailey, Hailey, wake up. Please Hailey”, Jay said softly. Adam was in the background calling for an ambulance and some back up.

She opened her eyes, Jay recognized the fight or flight response, she looked like she was going to fight.

“Hailey, it’s me. You’re safe. We got them. You’re safe”, Jay said as he tried to calm her down. He had tears in his eyes and so did she, once she realized it was him. The drugs were starting to wear off, but she was still out of it. 

“Can you stand?” He asked.

She nodded but her legs buckled underneath her when she tried.

“It’s alright, I got you”, Jay whispered as he picked her up to bring her outside. She collapsed her head into his chest, exhausted and thankful he understood her clue. She thought the waiter looked familiar and she had a bad feeling. It was almost too late by the time she pieced it together. She made a last ditch effort and was banking on the fact that Jay would remember her telling him about the creepy experience she had at that store. 

“Do you have my bracelet?” She quietly slurred.

Jay grinned and shook his head. After all that, that’s what she was worried about. “Yes Hails, I have your bracelet.”

They loaded her into the back of an ambulance and Jay jumped in without questioning it. The rest of the unit wasn’t surprised either. He held her hand on the way, she was in and out, trying to fight off whatever she was drugged with. Once they were at Med, low and behold there was Will again, who looked shocked and then worried when he saw Hailey wheeled in on a stretcher. 

“What happened?” Will asked Jay frantically.

He gave him the short version of the story and Will nodded, promising to take good care of her. He was able to sit with her after they were done examining her and pumping her stomach. Jay pulled Will aside, “Was she….?” He couldn’t even get the words out, but Will understood.

“No. No she wasn’t. We did a rape kit just to be sure.”

Jay let out a long sigh like he was holding all of his air in his lungs and nodded, thanking Will.

He sat next to Hailey’s bed, waiting for her to wake up. 

It was nearly 3 in the morning by the time she came to. Jay was still there, he hadn’t been sleeping much this week. This case was tough, and with the glass incident earlier in the week, his body was really working on overtime to keep his anxiety at bay. 

She stared at him with her big blue eyes, he was obviously shaken, and was looking dangerously close to unravelling.

“I think I know how you felt when I got shot now”, he said quietly while looking down at his feet. Hailey squeezed his hand extra tight in response. 

“Taylor?” She asked.

Jay filled her in on the basics. They found Taylor, in bad shape, but it looked like she was going to make it. The team was wrapping up with Trevor and the waiter at the station now. 

Hailey looked relieved. “Good. I’m glad those two will be off the street.”

Jay nodded, and turned his head when Will slowly entered her room. 

“Hey you two.”

“Hey Will”, Hailey replied.

“How are you feeling Hailey?”

“Better. Little groggy. I don’t think they did much….other than the drugs..?” She sort of half asked, half stated.

“No they didn’t. You were lucky….Taylor….um.” Will looked uncomfortable.

“Taylor wasn’t so lucky. But she’s going to make a full recovery thanks to you. You can go home in the morning. We just want to make sure everything is out of your system.”

Will had this look on his face, while Hailey and Jay just looked at one another. As horrible as it was, they were used to seeing this sort of thing. Will seemed a little more shaken by it. Jay always felt like he had to protect him from this part of his job, and always felt guilty when Will got dragged in anyways.

“I’ll let you get some rest. Jay, I can bring a cot in okay?” Will said.

Jay nodded. “I’m not going anywhere”, he made eyes at Hailey, who was glad he was here. She didn’t want to be alone right now.

Will came back a few minutes later with a pillow and a blanket and shut the lights off. Jay started to tally all the places he had fallen asleep with Hailey in the last little while, this being his least favourite.

Jay was woken up about an hour later by Hailey being restless in the hospital bed. She was having a bad dream, he of all people knew the signs of that. She was shaking and sweaty and her face was twisted up. A true role reversal, he sat down on the bed and tried to get her to wake up. 

“Hailey, Hailey”, he said while rubbing her shoulder.

Her eyes popped open and she looked scared. It took her a second to figure out where she was, some of the drugs were probably messing with her still. Jay had never known her to have nightmares like this before.

“You’re okay. You’re in the hospital. It was just a bad dream”, he reassured her.

She nodded slowly and took a few deep breaths. Jay had this pit in his stomach looking at her, she looked so small lying there in her gown. 

“You were right to trust your instincts Hailey”, he echoed a phrase she told him a few months prior.

She smiled nervously, biting her lip, to keep the tears from spilling. 

“Slide over”, he said smirking.

Hailey raised her eyebrow at him, like they were really going to do this….here? But she didn’t turn him down. She moved over in the bed to make some room and lifted the covers.

Jay wrapped his arms around her and let her cheek rest on his chest. He rubbed her back like she always did for him. “You did good Hails.” That’s when he felt her body heave, and saw the tears escape, letting the stress of the day catch up to her. 

“Shhh, Hailey. It’s okay. Shhh. You’re okay, I’m here”, he repeated to her. Hailey always found a way to calm him down and now it was his turn to do the same for her. They stayed like that until she had enough and fell asleep in his arms. He didn’t bother letting go, this is exactly where he needed to be.

Voight and Kim were at the hospital the next morning at 7:30. Checking on Taylor first, then going to meet up with Hailey. They assumed Jay was going to be here, but they were both a little surprised to find the two of them how they did. 

Kim smiled, she wished she could have taken a picture. Voight even felt his stone cold heart warm for just a minute. Kim looked at him suspiciously, gauging his reaction. 

Jay was curled up in the bed next to her and Hailey was nestled against him in his protective embrace. Jay didn’t look so tired anymore, Kim noted, more relaxed. Something about the way they were lying together looked so natural, like they had done this before. 

“Let them sleep”, Voight whispered, as they quietly left the room.


	17. Food Poisoning

Chapter 17

In the weeks following Hailey’s abduction, the unit was chasing the same old cases, same old Chicago gang and drug problems. Hailey and Jay were working on a case when Voight called and told them he needed Hailey for an undercover project. Jay looked at her reluctantly, reminded of the last time she went under, they almost didn’t get to her in time. She nodded at him in reassurance, she was alright, and ready to do her job.

Voight informed her that she would be acting as Ruzek’s girlfriend, which gained some stares from everyone in the unit, not just Jay. It was a well known secret that the two of them had been dating and recently broke up. Ironically, the only two who didn’t seem weirded out by this were Adam and Hailey themselves. They ended things in a way that was respectful and professional. They both cared about each other, the reality was just that things weren’t going anywhere long-term, no hard feelings. They got wired up and ready to head out, all business. Kim made sure Adam’s camera and microphones were working, Jay got Hailey suited up. Jay was behaving strangely with Hailey today, if she didn’t know any better, Hailey thought he might be jealous. 

Kim and Adam didn’t acknowledge the tension in the room, although you could cut it with a knife. Like Hailey and Adam’s relationship, there seemed to be another unspoken secret that Jay and Hailey were increasingly closer these days, even Voight knew that much. But Jay had been seriously on edge lately, so no one dared to comment. 

Hailey and Adam drove off to meet up with the heroin supplier. They had been trying to infiltrate this crew for weeks now, there was a lot of product being moved through the South side, even making it as far as the Gold Coast. These dealers had serious reach, and Intelligence was trying to make a big bust here. Adam particularly didn’t mind this assignment because he was able to drive the Porsche they had in their arsenal of undercover vehicles. Him and Hailey were civil with one another, laughing and joking on the way there. 

Jay and Kim were sitting in a surveillance van nearby, waiting for the deal to go down. Kim could practically feel the emotions coming off of Jay. She decided to take her life in her own hands and ask him what was wrong.

“What’s on your mind Jay?” She asked cautiously.

His head snapped out of his trance towards her, shaking his head. “Nothing.”

Kim knew him better than that. “Jay, you’ve been playing with that pen cap for the last 20 minutes and you might stomp a hole in the floor of this van if your leg doesn’t quit shaking.”

Jay instantly stopped when he realized what he had been doing, nervous habits. He cleared his throat, and tried to change the subject. Nobody here knew what this day meant to him. An anniversary he’d very much like to forget. 

“Too much coffee this morning. Just feeling a bit jittery.” He was a ticking time bomb today, Kim just didn’t know it. 

Kim thought about pushing more, it was obvious that Jay was nervous about something. If she had to put money on it, it was the fact that Hailey was undercover again. The last time that happened things didn’t turn out so well. 

“She’s going to be fine Jay. Adam is with her, nothing will happen to them”, she said testing the waters to see if he would react.

She thought right. Jay instantly gave her a glare, Kim could see the walls being built up behind his eyes to protect his true feelings.

“I know they will. Adam will protect her”, he said emphasizing that a little more than he should have, as he watched the two of them laughing together and Adam grazing Hailey’s arm with his hand. 

Interesting, Kim thought. So it was more than Hailey being undercover again, the fact that it was with Adam and not him clearly bothered him. She almost laughed, at the immaturity and simultaneous cuteness of it all. She decided to cut him some slack and give him a confidence boost. 

“Just so you know Jay, she never looked at Adam the way she looks at you”, Kim said as she caught the smile he tried to hide out of the corner of her eye. He nodded at her. 

They were interrupted by the supplier driving up to the meet up spot. Jay had to watch while Hailey and Adam held hands and whispered into each others ears and put on the whole romantic show. He wasn’t sure why this was bothering him so much, but it was. His anxiety was high today already, he could barely sit still. He couldn’t wait for the day to be done. Today of all days, he just needed to be alone. 

Overall, the buy went well, they were able to make the deal and arrest the supplier in the process. Well Atwater and Antonio handled that part. All in all, a successful day’s work, pretty routine, no surprises. 

They headed back to the station and got out of their undercover clothes. Ruzek loosened the tie around his neck, glad that he didn’t have to wear a suit to work everyday. Posing as a high end drug dealer was enough dress up for one day. It was nice working with Hailey again. Despite everything, they were still able to remain friends and he was thankful for that. There was a lot going on in his life that no one knew about right now, well except for Antonio and Voight, but that was a story for another time. 

Hailey popped her head around the corner, “Molly’s tonight?” She asked Kevin, Adam, and Kim who were still standing there. 

“Sounds good, we’ll meet you there later”, they replied. Hailey nodded and turned to leave when she stumbled upon Jay coming out of the bathroom.

“Hey”, she said. They didn’t have much time to chat today, or the last couple weeks really. “Molly’s?”

Jay looked off, but quickly hid it on his face. “I think I’ll pass tonight”, he replied with a strange coolness in his voice that she wasn’t used to.

“Oh, alright. Everything okay?” She probed, a bit surprised, he never turned down a night out at Molly’s.

He nodded silently, “Ya, all good. Have fun with Adam tonight.”

“What is that supposed to mean?” She said confused. 

“You guys look like you’re close again, so don’t really want to intrude.”

She shook her head, he could be so stupid sometimes. “Jay, you know that was just part of the deal today. We were pretending to be a couple...”

“Must have been an easy transition back. Convenient to have two people in this unit who are sleeping together, makes it more real you know?”

Now Hailey was really mad. “Why are you doing this Jay? Adam and I are not sleeping together anymore, you know that. And for the record, even if we were, I don’t appreciate you assuming I couldn’t possibly remain objective and I don’t know, just do my job and not behave like a school girl. But hey, you of all people would know about that right? She knew she was stepping into dangerous territory right now, bringing up Erin. She felt guilty for a second when she said that and saw the look on his face, she knew she had pushed a button.

“Whatever Hailey. Keep acting like that and you’re just going to be labelled as another female detective doing what she has to in order to make it to the top.” Hailey looked like she was going to explode.

He looked at her and he could see the hurt in her eyes. Truth be told, he wasn’t sure why he was doing this, Hailey didn’t deserve that. She wasn’t that kind of girl at all. Maybe it was the last few months, the talk with Kim today, but he had this urge to push Hailey away. He couldn’t handle getting close to her and then have the possibility of losing her, just like Erin, just like everyone else in his life that seemed to be close to him one day then gone the next. He hated this day every year, but he hated it even more this time around because it reminded him of everything he’s lost, and everything that he has now that he could still lose. Call it self-sabotage, but opening up to Hailey scared him. It scared him how deeply he cared for her and how much she knew about his personal life. It made him want to run, she deserved better than him. This was the easiest way. 

Hailey let out a sigh, carefully choosing her next words. She had no idea where this was coming from. Things with Jay the last few months had been the best they ever had, their friendship was one of the most important things in her life. How could he just turn on her like this and say such disrespectful things? It made her hurt in a way she never felt before. 

“Alright Jay. If that’s what you really think of me. I’m glad you showed your true colours now, rather than later.” She stormed off and wanted to get as far away from the locker room as possible before she let the tears fall from her eyes. Unbeknownst to her, Kim was still around the corner and overheard the whole thing. Like Hailey, she was also confused, and pissed how Jay handled that. That came out of left field. Anyone with eyes could see how much Jay adored Hailey, there had to be a bigger reason for that outburst. She heard Hailey furiously storm off and Jay punch the locker out of anger as soon as she was out of range. 

Jay, you are such an idiot, she thought. She couldn’t help but feel a little guilty, maybe she crossed the line earlier hinting that Hailey had feelings for him too. Regardless, this was not the reaction she was expecting out of him, but in a way she understood. Jay had this wall, rather fortress, up around him. Not only his heart, but just in general. He let next to nobody in, it’s even taken him the better part of the last 4 years to let his own brother in. Kim wasn’t even fully convinced that Will knew that much about him still. She shook her head, and decided not to see if Jay was alright. He needed to cool down. She quietly slipped out of the locker room, feeling uneasy about the night ahead. 

The rest of the unit, minus Jay, showed up at Molly’s and had drinks together. It had been ages since they all did this, and it actually was good to blow off some steam. The last few months had been crazy. They mingled with some of the firefighters at 51 and had everyone laughing when they convinced Platt and Mouch to do karaoke. A classic! Hailey’s phone went off a few times, Jay’s number flashing up on the screen. Kim noticed this, but didn’t comment. Atwater was actually the one to point it out.

“Upton, look’s like Halstead is blowing up your phone. Where is he anyways? You should call him back, tell him to get down here.” Ruzek and Platt nodded in agreement.

Hailey tried to disguise the hurt on her face, “Ahh it’s okay. Too loud in here. He said he was too tired for drinks tonight. I’ll call him back later.”, she said trying to hide that there was a rift between them. The guys seemed to buy it and moved on to the next topic, trying to find a cute girl in the bar for Atwater. Thankfully that occupied most of their time and no one seemed to notice Hailey was close to tears. The night ended and everyone went their separate ways. Kim walked out with Hailey, unsure if she should bring up what she heard in the locker room after shift. 

“Hey, um. Just so you know, I overheard some of your conversation with Jay tonight”, Kim said while Hailey looked mortified.

“Kim, it’s fine…”, Hailey said before she got cut off.

“No, it isn’t fine. He’s an idiot for saying that. You know he doesn’t actually think that about you right?” Hoping to get Hailey to realize why he was acting out. 

Hailey shook her head, “Well, I thought he held me in higher regard than that but apparently not.”

Kim let out a half smile, “Jay cares about you. A lot. Trust me.”

“He has a funny way of showing it”, Hailey rolled her eyes and flagged down her Uber. 

“Night Kim, see you tomorrow”, Hailey smiled at her and waved to the rest of the guys.

Adam came up behind Kim, “Hailey’s okay?” Sensing a weird vibe from her tonight.

Kim covered for her, “Ya she’s good, just making sure she got in an Uber okay. Atwater’s driving us home?” She asked changing the subject.

“Ya let’s go, we have to work in the morning!” Adam said and laughed as they all left Molly’s together. 

Hailey was partnered up with Atwater the next day, which was fine with her. Jay was being cold for no reason, so it was best they had a few days of space. She never called him back last night and refused to make eye contact with him this morning. She could feel him looking at her out of the corner of her eye, but there was no way she was letting him off the hook this easy. Kim saw Jay glancing at Hailey during the morning briefing, his eyes looking a little more tired and sadder than usual. Everyone went about their business, Hailey brushing Jay off as he tried to grab her attention for a minute before she headed out for the day. 

Hailey and Kevin smiled and gave each other their special handshake. “Hailey I know you and Jay have your own little thing going, but I can PROMISE, we will be listening to good music and eating great food today. None of that stuff Halstead has you on. I know all the good spots” Atwater teased.

They all chuckled and headed out towards their vehicles. 

Her and Kev were having a great day, listening to music, joking around, and he showed her an amazing Mexican spot for lunch that she would definitely be going back to. She needed this. They got a call from Voight shortly after they were done eating that they were needed back at the district as soon as possible. 

Platt and Voight stormed up the stairs barking orders about tracking a stolen vehicle that was connected to this morning’s robbery homicide at the corner store on Lakeshore. The team quickly got to work and started looking into potential leads, Hailey didn’t even realize Jay wasn’t in the room. 

“Where’s Halstead?” Voight asked after looking around and realizing he was missing one of his Detectives.

“He’s lying down Sarge, I think he has a bit of food poisoning”, Kim spoke up.

“I told him not to eat that leftover chicken salad for lunch”, Trudy said shaking her head.

The rest of the team, even Voight, cringed a little at that, chicken salad was questionable on a good day. But bad chicken salad always meant bad things were going to happen to you. 

“Alright. Well leave him be then. Upton you can take him home later on, once we get going on this case”, Voight said.

Hailey nodded, not willing to share that her and Jay were at odds this week. That was on a need to know basis, and right now, all their Sergeants needed to know was that Jay was lying down because he wasn’t feeling well. She would deal with the rest later. 

The team spent the next few hours sorting out evidence, tracking down witnesses, and looking into any leads with their CI’s. Atwater managed to find a street camera that caught two of the suspects fleeing the scene. Him and Ruzek went back to the corner store to see if any other businesses around managed to catch anything on their security cameras. Jay was still nowhere to be found. Platt went in to investigate, but when she opened the door Jay was no longer lying on the couch. Confused, she took it upon herself to find him. Hailey and Kim were busy digging up background’s on the suspects so they didn’t see her sneak off. 

She found him sitting on the floor of the locker room. Clearly having a bad time, his skin was pale, and his body was shaking violently. 

“Halstead?” She called out softly. 

Jay raised his head slightly, Platt could tell this took a lot of energy out of him. He looked grey, he had probably been sick to his stomach several times by now.

“This is what I get for the chicken salad isn’t it”, he told her, trying his best to smile. 

She smirked back, “Ya probably not wise to trust a batch that’s been sitting outside on a picnic table for a few hours in this heat.”

“I’ll keep that in mind for next time”, he managed before he got up to throw up again.  
“How are you doing in there?” She asked him after the heaving stopped.

“Not very well Sarge”, he took a deep breath, just trying to keep it together long enough for someone on the team to take him home.

Platt came in closer to him to assess the situation. 

“Hailey’s a little busy right now, so you’re stuck with me for a bit”, she offered him a bottle of water.

“Thanks”, he smiled as he went to sit down on one of the benches nearby, ignoring her comment about Hailey. He didn’t exactly want her to see him like this, she probably didn’t want to see him at all after yesterday.

“Slow sips”, Platt instructed. Food poisoning was rough, it was never a good time for anyone. They had all been there at one point or another. Jay seemed to be relatively keeping it together, but judging by the look on his face he was probably in for a long night. 

Platt wasn’t a mother herself, she found Randall later in life, at a point where kids weren’t really an option anymore. But she still felt like a maternal figure to the officers and detectives in this district. They were her family and she always looked out for them, even though she didn’t always show it. 

Jay closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths. He was hunched over on the bench holding his side. Platt put a hand on his back and sat with him before he went to throw up the water he just drank too.

“Jay maybe it’s time to go home…”

“No I’ll be alright. Everyone’s busy. I can tough it out for a bit longer”, he said stubbornly.

“Your tough guy act isn’t working on me Jay. You should be in bed”, Trudy told him.

He didn’t have a reply to that because he ran back towards the bathroom for the 4th time since she had come down here.

She shook her head and left him to go back upstairs to grab Hailey, it was time to get him home. 

Kim and Hailey were deep into their background checks when they saw Platt come back upstairs.

“Where’d you Sarge? I thought you were going to help us with vehicle checks, but we turned around and you were gone”, Hailey asked.  
“I think you should take Jay home, I’ll jump in for you here. He’s really sick down there”, Platt said.

Kim and Hailey looked at each other. Last night got ugly between the two of them. Jay said some pretty rude things to Hailey.

“I don’t think it’s me that he needs right now”, Hailey said coolly, her tone not going unnoticed by Kim or Trudy.

Kim shook her head at Platt behind Hailey’s back, motioning not to ask about it. 

“Hailey, you’re probably the only thing he needs right now, whether he wants to admit it or not”, Platt added.

Hailey looked up at the two women, raising her eyebrows but not replying to that. 

“Alright well let me finish up this report and I’ll go check on him”, she said flatly.

The three of them got to work on their files and Hailey logged off once she felt satisfied she had contributed enough to the case for the day. She didn’t exactly rush it, maybe some suffering is what Jay deserved today.

She wasn’t all in on looking after him tonight either, he really pissed her off yesterday. Her blood boiled thinking about the comments he made to her. But she knew Platt was right, Jay wouldn’t let anyone else near him but her. Stubborn Halstead trait.

Kim and Platt smiled at her as she started to head down the stairs, Hailey rolled her eyes in return. 

She could hear him as soon as she stepped in the locker room, he sounded violently ill, which made her feel bad for a second. And took her back to a time where she had dodgy sushi, the results were not good. But then she saw him and the anger bubbled up again.

He came out of the stall looking rough, there was no question about whether or not he was actually sick. She was waiting for him with her arms crossed, leaning against a locker. His face seemed to look worse once he saw her. His eyes fell to the floor, too embarrassed to make eye contact. 

“I’ve come to take you home, as per a request from Platt”, Hailey said without any emotion in her voice.

“I don’t need your help Hailey”, Jay snapped back in an effort to push her away. 

He attempted to make his way to a bench but stopped halfway, doubled over and grabbed his stomach, feeling a sharp pain. He steadied himself by holding onto a locker edge.

Hailey put her feelings aside for a moment and went over to him. She put her hand on his back and helped him ease onto a bench, making sure he didn’t fall over.

“Jay. Don’t be stupid. You can barely stand, you look like you’re going to pass out. How many times have you thrown up?” The smallest bit of sympathy creeping through her voice.

“I’ve lost track”, he admitted quietly.

“Alright. Well, I’m going to take you home now”, Hailey said definitively. She left him sitting there to grab both of their coats and belongings from upstairs. Ruz, Kev and Voight had just returned. They ended up picking up one of the suspects in the robbery and were about to question him. 

“We have it under control Hailey, how’s Jay?” Kim asked concerned.

“Not very good, white as a ghost. He’s been throwing up for the last few hours apparently”, Hailey replied. Voight overheard this and gave his permission for her to take him home.

She went back downstairs quietly and found Jay curled up against a locker. She cleared her throat letting him know she was there. He opened one of his eyes slowly, his complexion was still pale. 

“Let’s go”, she said as she held out her hand to help him stand up. 

He looked at it reluctantly, but then accepted the fact that he needed her to steady him. She threw his coat over his shoulders and walked slowly with him to her car, unsure how the night was going to unfold.


	18. Darkest Secret

Chapter 18

The ride back to his place was a pretty silent one. Jay was focused on not throwing up in Hailey’s car, which by a miracle he managed to pull off successfully. He didn’t want to think about how Hailey would have reacted if he threw up in her car too. Hailey was focused on not blowing up at him for what he said to her last night, and how he had been treating her all week. 

They walked up to his apartment, Jay wasn’t sure if Hailey was just going to drop him off on the curb and let him suffer alone or what. He wouldn’t blame her if she did. But she followed him up. He made a run for the bathroom as soon as his front door was open. Hailey sat in the kitchen, debating whether or not she should stay. She had just made the decision to leave when she heard Jay’s voice quietly calling out to her. She looked up and saw his head poking out of the bathroom door frame. He had also taken his shirt off for some reason, which was a distraction she was not going to give into.

“Do you need anything? I’m about to head out”, she said with an icy tone.

He looked disappointed, in her leaving, in himself maybe. It made Hailey second guess her decision to go for a brief moment. 

“Oh. I was hoping you would stay for a bit. So that we could talk”, he said sheepishly.

The upset look on his face made her desperately want to stay. It made her want to abandon her anger, sit next to him and rub his back and take care of him while he was sick. But his behaviour put a really sour taste in her mouth that she couldn’t shake. 

“I’m not sure that there’s anything to talk about right now Jay’, Hailey said, her voice cracking a bit as she felt the sadness and hurt creep in.

Jay noticed this and it made him feel worse than he already did, if that was even possible. He knew he screwed up, in a huge way. He didn’t know what he could do or say to make it up to her. He’s messed so many things up, but his relationship with Hailey was too important to him. He needed to face his fear and be honest with her and tell her why he was really upset.

“Please Hailey. I’m sorry. I want to make things right”, he said sadly. He started to say something else before he felt his stomach turn abruptly. He rushed back in and closed the door. Hailey cringed when she heard him heaving yet again. She sighed and rolled her eyes. Regardless of how pissed she was right now, it didn’t exactly feel right leaving him alone while he was this sick either, and she knew Will was at work tonight. She paused for a minute before cautiously opening the bathroom door. He was hunched over the toilet, dry heaving. Never a good feeling, she thought. She didn’t say anything to him, just found a face cloth and ran it under some cool water. She took a seat on the edge of the bath tub off to the side of him and gently started dabbing the back of his neck and forehead with it. Strictly out of pity, she tried to convince herself. He looked up at her with sad eyes and a half smile, to silently thank her for staying and taking care of him. She didn’t react, she was still mad at him, so she just sat there in silence while he tried to get whatever it was out of his system.

She tried to force him to drink some water a while later, but he refused, knowing it was just going to reappear after a few minutes.

“You’re going to get dehydrated. Well, more than you already are. Don’t make me call Will”, she threatened. That was the most she’s said to him since they’ve been back at his place. It seemed to work and he agreed to attempt some ice chips.

He seemed to be alright after those, which was a good sign. It had been several hours since Hailey brought him home now, but things weren’t exactly looking up just yet. They were in for a long night again. 

Jay ignored Hailey’s request for him to go lie down in his bed. He knew his stomach was not finished with whatever it was doing. Thank goodness it was only coming up one end and not out the other. Him and Hailey were close, but not that close. If there was a silver lining to this day, that was it, he thought to himself and chuckled. He was leaned up against the tub with his back to her, she was still sitting on the edge. She was silently doing what she normally did for him when he was sick, and listened to him as he moaned in pain swearing off chicken salad for life. She was there for him, although he could practically feel the anger seeping out of her. He didn’t really have the energy for their chat right now, and she recognized that at least. He knew full well that she was going to lash out as soon as he was feeling up to it, which he deserved. They were putting it on the shelf for the time being. 

His body was shivering from sitting on the cold tile floor for so long, but the heat radiating off him told a different story. Hailey didn’t say anything when that started, and didn’t say anything when he leaned the side of his head against her knees to rest either. She just held the face cloth against his forehead, and kept quiet. She could tell he was tired. He was fighting to keep his eyes open for a reason, they both knew what was going to happen once he fell asleep. 

“You can go if you want Hailey. I’ll be alright”, he said softly.

“I’m not going anywhere Jay”, she replied, not in her usual tone, but one that showed that despite everything, she still cared, and he let out a smile that she couldn’t see.

He stopped throwing up around 11…. A full 8 hours after he started. Hailey’s stomach hurt for him. She had gone to heat up some broth to try and convince him to get something down before going to bed. 

Jay had moved to the couch at this point, still shirtless, but she had wrapped a blanket around his shoulders when he sat down to try and keep him from shivering so much. Hailey came over with a small bowl and nudged him to sit up so he could have some. He didn’t fully trust his stomach at the moment so he looked at her sceptically, he was drained. She sat down next to him, grabbed a spoonful and held it up to his face.

“Come on Jay, you have to try something”, she said quietly encouraging him. 

He had to hold back from smirking as he stared at her. This morning she wasn’t even looking at him, let alone speaking to him. Yet here they were almost at midnight in his apartment and she was wrapping him in a blanket, spoon feeding him broth on the couch. He loved her ‘take no shit’, but also secretly caring attitude, even if that did mean he was still in the dog house. The same stubbornness she had against speaking to him shone through while she was trying to look after him. He slurped some slowly.

“That’s it”, she said as she tilted the spoon back, hoping he would keep this down. 

“You know, I think giving me the silent treatment is worse than you yelling at me”, Jay said testing the waters after the broth was done.

Hailey didn’t react much, Jay noticed her nostrils flare before she spoke, one of her tell tale signs that she was still fuming. He didn’t think she would let him off the hook that easy, but it was worth a shot. He was trying to get her to talk to him, because he wanted to fix things, but he didn’t know how. He betrayed her trust and he didn’t feel good about that. But he knew that under all the anger she was really just hurt and upset by his words and actions, he owed it to her to fix it. 

Hailey got up to put the dishes in his sink. She watched him from the kitchen, unsure what she was going to do for the night. If she left, she wasn’t sure she could live with the guilt of knowing Jay would likely be having panic attacks all night alone. But if she stayed, she didn’t want him to think everything was fine between them either, because it wasn’t. She still hadn’t said much to him, she was just trying to focus on making sure he was feeling okay. She saw him nodding off in front of the TV, all wrapped up in the blanket she put around his shoulders. He did look kind of cute, and under different circumstances she would have jumped at the chance to spoon feed him broth. She sat down next to him, which made him open his eyes again. She cautiously extended a hand out to him, “Temporary truce?”

He smiled softly and intertwined his hand with hers, knowing what she was doing for him so he could get some sleep, his body desperately needed it. “Temporary truce”, he echoed back as he made himself comfortable on the couch and leaned his head against her shoulder.

They watched some TV and it wasn’t long before Jay nodded off, he didn’t even make it through half an episode of Friends. His body slid further down hers to the point that she eventually just gave in and let him lie completely horizontal with his head in her lap on a pillow. 

Jay woke up a couple episodes later, blinking his eyes at the screen and checking the time…just after 1 in the morning. He didn’t move to tip Hailey off that he was awake at first. He wanted to soak up the last few minutes of her being nice to him, she was running her hand over his hair again, what his mom used to do for him. It was comforting and she knew that. He smiled secretly knowing that she thought to do that for him, maybe there was a chance she would forgive him after all. He decided that it was now or never, late night talk it is. 

He flipped over to face her, trying to gage her mood. She looked tired too, but immediately perked up seeing that he was awake.

“You alright…?”, she asked slowly, pressing her hand against his cheeks and forehead.

He nodded. “I’m okay. Thanks.” She helped him sit up again and assumed he was going to go to his bed. 

“Hailey…”, Jay said grabbing her hand. That caught her off guard, she wasn’t expecting it so she pulled back a little. When she saw how nervous he looked, she softened, and allowed him to continue.

“I’m really sorry. I should have never said what I did, I know that I hurt you. What I said was completely untrue and unfair, I hate myself for it. It came from a place of anger, and jealousy. You are an amazing detective, and I know that personal relationships would never affect your ability to do your job. I’m sorry for bringing Adam into this, it has nothing to do with him. You are so important to me, you have no idea.”

“Is that how you treat people that are important to you? Look around Jay, it’s just me here. You don’t let anyone else in, I don’t understand. You say we are close, that I’m the most important person to you, and you treat me like you did this week…. It’s not okay. Every time I think we are solid, you end up pushing me away, and that really sucks.” She replied with anger and a bit of hurt in her voice. 

Now it was Jay’s turn to look upset, as true as her words were, they still stung when she said them out loud. But he deserved this, she had every right to yell at him. 

“I know it’s not okay. And I’m not going to make excuses for what I did. But please just hear me out.”

She looked at him suspiciously. He got up from the couch and went into his room, trying to find the courage to do what he was about to do. He had been seeing Dr. Charles lately, something Hailey didn’t know about. He encouraged him to be open and honest about his feelings, something Jay wasn’t very good at. The only way things were going to get better is if he was willing to talk about it and no longer bury his pain. Telling Hailey was a huge step that had been weighing on him, he still wasn’t sure if it was a good idea. He wanted to protect her from his past, not invite her in, it was nothing but bad news. 

She heard him pull a box out from underneath his bed and rummage through it for a minute. She wondered what was in there. He came back out after throwing a hoodie on and two photos in his hand. Will has never even seen these pictures. No one but Mouse, who was there and also lived through it, fully knows what happened to Jay that day. 

He sat back down next to her on the couch and took a deep breath in. She couldn’t imagine why he was getting himself so worked up about a couple of pictures. He looked pale again, this time from nerves, and his voice cracked before he got his words out. 

“I was in a bad place yesterday…today... In general. Not that it justifies how I treated you, because it doesn’t. But every year, around this time, I really go off the deep end. You just happened to be my punching bag this time, and for that I’m sorry, you have no idea how sorry I am…”, he was starting to ramble because he didn’t know how to tell her. This was his deepest secret, and the start of the darkest day and time of his life. He was scared that she would never look at him the same again. That all she would see is this ugly, wounded version of himself. One that wasn’t able to be whole again, or fixed. 

She was looking at him with deep curiosity and also a hint of fear. She had no idea what he was about to show her, she didn’t even have a guess. He closed his eyes and handed her the first photo, one of Jay and bunch of guys in army fatigues, geared up with weapons standing in front of a helicopter. All of them were smiling. She looked over at him confused, by this time he was staring back at her, a bit blankly. 

“Flip it over”, he said.

May 26, 2009, was written on the back in Jay’s handwriting. Hailey still wasn’t understanding, so Jay continued on. 

“That was my unit, ten years ago yesterday.” He paused, Hailey was getting increasingly more nervous by the look on his face.

“And this is what was left ten years ago today”, he blurted out as he handed her the other picture. Halstead & Mouse, May 27, 2009, written on the back, this time in someone else’s handwriting. 

Hailey felt a chill run down her spine, suddenly feeling the urge to throw up herself.

Her eyes went wide and she felt the tears welling up and getting caught in the back of her throat, she put a hand over her mouth to try and control her reaction. Hailey would have never believed this was a photo of Jay, not in a million years. He was unrecognizable, lying unconscious in a hospital bed with all of the tubes and wires poking out, and the swelling. He was absentmindedly running his hand over his tracheotomy scar. 

“We were sent in to pick up a few civilians in this village. They weren’t safe living where they were, the Taliban was occupying the town, things were getting dangerous. It was supposed to be an in and out, night operation. We went in, got everyone back to the Chinook, no problem. Just as we were taking off I look over at this one little boy and smiled, he smiled back at me and that’s when I saw it. His mom was holding a grenade in her hand, smirking at me, must have snuck it in his backpack, or rather someone gave it to them to sneak it in. The look on that kid’s face….I’ll never forget it. He had no idea what he was about to do”, Jay shook his head, staring off into the distance, still in disbelief all these years later. 

“He pulled the pin, and that’s the last thing I remember.” 

Hailey stared at Jay silently, amazed at how strangely calm he was while telling her this. She’s seen him way more worked up over much less. She thought back to the Jake Miller case again, when Jay freaked out in that basement over the woman hiding a child under her burka. She had no idea that took him back to the worst day of his life. She felt foolish now for telling him he wasn’t in Afghanistan anymore, as if that was any comfort. Part of him was still there, and it might always be.

Jay realized Hailey hadn’t said anything in a while. She was staring at him with a look in her eyes that he’s never seen before, he continued. 

“The helicopter crashed, I was ejected, the only reason I’m here is probably because we were still pretty low to the ground. I have no recollection of this, but Mouse filled me in on the details later. Well, the censored version. He was hurt, but not as badly as me, his was more mental trauma. Mouse remembers all of it. I wish he didn’t. I didn’t do enough to help him when we got home….”

She thought of all the times, now would be when Jay would be breathing heavily and slipping into a panic attack, but it was her that was beginning to feel that way. He was calm and stoic, like that person in the picture didn’t exist anymore, as if he was just telling her a story. 

“I woke up in a hospital in Germany two weeks later. Mouse and I were the only ones from our unit that made it”, he said quietly. He looked to her for a reaction, but still nothing. He figured she was saving it until the end, so he kept going, anxious to get this over with.

“I felt guilty for a long time. I still do. That we didn’t check the bags before we got on, we thought we were doing the right thing by helping those people. Where we picked our seats that night determined whether we lived or died. I still haven’t been able to wrap my head around it all.”

“Jay….”, was all Hailey could get out, shaking her head in disbelief, she reached over and put a hand on his knee. She was still staring at the photo of him, fixated on what happened to him that night and all the days since then.  
“Both of my lungs collapsed, I broke 8 ribs, my collarbone, my pelvis, my jaw, my spleen ruptured, severe concussion…”, he read her mind and watched her bite her trembling lip. 

Hailey’s mind was racing. She was wracking her brain trying to think about what she was doing ten years ago today. Probably enjoying a summer in between college, partying with her friends. Not this, nowhere near it. Her and Jay were the same age, but she never really thought about how different their pasts were. It didn’t sink in until now, seeing this made it very real. Why she was mad at him earlier didn’t really seem that important anymore. 

“Anyways that was my 2nd tour. This is why I was medically discharged. Up until a few months ago, these records were sealed because it was a classified mission, no one really knew what happened to me, not even my family. They knew I was hurt, but not as badly as it really was. We were technically not supposed to be there at the time, in that village. It’s all a little irrelevant now, but ya. You get the idea.”

“And Mouse?” Hailey questioned, still trying to wrap her head around everything she just heard. It was well past 2 in the morning now, she had a feeling they were going to be staying up all night and taking tomorrow as a personal day. 

“He actually worked in Intelligence for a while. Jay smirked. You would have loved him, he’s even sassier than me. But he re-enlisted. As far as I know he’s somewhere back in the Middle East as we speak. I never understood that decision, I begged him not to go back. But I think in his own way, he needed to, that was his way of making peace with what happened to us, with how it ended.” 

“Why are you telling me this?” She asked quietly.

Not the reaction he was expecting, but a reaction from her nonetheless.

“Because I trust you. And I want to let you in. And I’m tired of running from this. I’m kind of glad I was sick today, so I could actually feel the pain of this day. I look at these photos once a year and I don’t know what’s scarier. What happened to us that day, or each year slowly not remembering who I was before this.”

What she was seeing now was the deepest, darkest, messiest part of his soul. She couldn’t believe he was trusting her with this. 

“I came home and my mom was sick, so I put all my energy into looking after her. After she died I didn’t know what to do with myself. Its been ten years. Sometimes it feels like fifty, other days it feels like yesterday. I’ve never really dealt with it you know? But I’m trying to now.”

Her eyes were going to break his heart. She was gazing at him so intensely, he almost didn’t know what to do, but he could absolutely feel what she was thinking. Her blue eyes looked as deep as the ocean, he could drown in them.  
Now for the hard part, he took a deep breath and got ready to pour his heart out. 

“I did what I did yesterday to push you away, I didn’t want you to realize something was wrong. You don’t need to be dealing with this, I’m messy. I will never be the same again. It took me a long time to come to terms with that, but you deserve better than this, better than me. I’m not telling you this so that you feel sorry for me, or let me off the hook for yesterday. Because I was an ass, I know that. I’ve never showed anyone these before. Looking back, I might have been able to fix a lot of relationships if I did. I’m trying to move forward, and this is the only way I know how to do that. And as much as I appreciate you staying with me all the nights that you have, I don’t want to have to hold anyone’s hand just to be able to fall asleep. It’s hard. Believe me, there’s nothing I’d rather do than hold your hand every night before bed, but not because of this.” He eyed her curiously, even that, still nothing. He was convinced she was in shock- she didn’t even bat an eye at that rare slip up of his love for her.

“Hailey, you have to know that I care about you, more than anyone else. I’m just trying to protect you from this. I’ve been down this road before…” he looked off into the distance as he caught himself from saying too much. 

“If you don’t want to be my partner anymore I understand”, he exhaled and looked at her, nervous for her response. He had no idea what she was thinking, all he could see was tears falling down her face, she wasn’t even hiding them anymore. Jay had not cried tonight oddly enough. He thought he was going to a few times, but he kept it together. Maybe because he was finally ready to talk about this out loud, or because he knew he was going to have to be strong for the two of them. 

“Hailey, please say something”, Jay quietly begged after another minute of silence, as he took her hand in his and locked eyes with her, waiting for her to react. 

She felt frozen in place. She thought she had Jay figured out, she really did. But this caught her incredibly off guard, she still had so many questions to ask him. By opening up and sharing this with her, she knew that he was ready and that he truly cared enough about her to let her all the way in. If he could be brave, so could she.

She looked up at him, longing to tell him that none of his messy baggage mattered to her. That he was strong and the only person she fully trusted. That she adored every part of him, flawed and not. That she would do whatever he needed her to do, support him however she could, regardless of what their status was outside of just partners at work. It was her turn to take a deep breath and look deeply into his eyes, all that came out was the truth, it suddenly seemed so simple. 

“I love you Jay”, she said calmly and confidently, those words spilling out easier than she thought they would. 

All of her anger was washed away, and was replaced with a familiar feeling inside her chest, one that she no longer needed to push down and pretend didn’t exist.   
Jay’s heart skipped a few beats and his mouth curled up into a smile. He didn’t know if she meant love as in romantically, as partners, as friends, maybe that part didn’t even matter right now. They said “I love you” with their eyes all the time, he had no doubt about that. Neither of them were too keen on sharing their emotions, but they didn’t need words the majority of the time, they were so in sync. Confiding in her tonight was the step he needed to be able to move forward with his life. He felt strangely at ease, like all the pain and suffering he had gone through lead him here to this. A ten year weight felt lifted off his chest, no longer threatening to drop and suffocate him at any moment. Looking into her eyes and holding onto her hand in this moment right now, all that mattered is that they were here, together. 

“I love you too Hails.”


	19. I'm going where you go

Chapter 19 

Saying I love you was the easy part. It was everything else that was going to require a deep conversation. It was a talk for another time. Right now, Hailey and Jay were content with that and sat there soaking in this new found development in their already strong relationship. Once Jay said it back, Hailey’s infamous half smile and dimples made an appearance. She nodded, and silently confirmed every emotion, every electric eye glance, every hand grab and every loaded conversation they had ever shared with one another. 

Telling Jay she loved him was more than about finally being truthful. It was also because he needed to hear it, today out of all days. He needed to hear that he was loved unconditionally and that someone was going to have his back always, that his flaws and difficult past were worth loving too. She wanted to make sure he knew she was behind him all the way, and that he no longer had to face his struggles alone. Regardless of what it meant for them romantically, Hailey loved Jay for Jay. Anything else, if it went there, was just a bonus. 

What they had was real, and they finally admitted it out loud. It was simple and nonchalant, and if Jay was being honest, exactly how he envisioned it happening. So casual. He was half expecting everything to change after they confessed their feelings to each other, but in reality, it just felt natural. Hailey was always more to him than a partner, a best friend, or a drinking buddy. She was his confidant, voice of reason, secret keeper, safe haven and his anchor who keeps him grounded and helps him weather the roughest of storms. It still amazed him how much they could tell each other with just their eyes, but now that they used their words, he was eager to tell her more. He was convinced he’s known Hailey in another lifetime, and that they were meant to find each other in this one too. Their connection was too deep for this not to mean something. 

Hailey loved Jay with every fibre of her being, and she knew he loved her back. She always thought so, but now she knows for sure. She was still staring at that old photo of him, feeling torn. She realized she didn’t know the boy in that photo. He was so young, and so much more than a soldier. That might have been his identity for a long time, it’s still part of it now. Jay had been through hell, there was no denying that. It might have been the defining point in his life, but it would not change how she felt about him. She looked over at him and realized that in despite of everything she just found out, she very much knows the man sitting before her right now, and that was all the confirmation she needed. 

They were still sitting on the couch, Hailey sitting cross-legged facing Jay who was staring at the TV. She wiggled over, letting go of his hand, and pulled him into a long hug. They had hugged before, slept like this before, but for a brief moment it was as if they were exploring each other’s physical touch for the first time, in a different way, a fresh way. He adjusted himself to face her chest to chest as she wrapped her arms tightly around his neck. She felt all the tension release from his body as he rested his head on her shoulder and she slowly ran a hand up and down his back. She liked the way he smelled, like the woods. The blanket around his shoulders draped and fell over hers too. They stayed like this for a few minutes, totally silent, embracing the calmness of this moment. Jay was absentmindedly running his fingers through her hair, taking in the smell of her lavender body wash, as if he had never laid a hand on her prior to this. Her face was buried into the crook of his neck, feeling the electric spark coursing through their veins as she listened to the steadiness of his heart beat. She came down from this temporary high, and planted a soft kiss where his neck met his jaw line before pulling back. He looked her in the eyes, knowing a real kiss or anything else was going to wait. Tonight was heavy, and this brief moment of physical contact was enough for now, somehow this felt more intimate than anything else. Little did they know, they would be doing the same thing tomorrow on the floor of a surveillance van, only with slightly more urgency. 

Hailey got up from the couch and went to the kitchen to make them tea before bed. Jay was tired, and he temporarily forgot that he had been sick all night. He went back to his room to stash the pictures back in his memory box, pausing and grinning before he decided to bring the whole thing into the living room. Hailey looked at him curiously with a smile on her face, seeing his most cherished possessions laid out on the coffee table for her to take a peek. 

She sat down next to him and handed him some peppermint tea, hoping to calm his stomach, she noticed he was looking a bit queasy still. He sipped it gratefully then motioned to the box.

“Take a look. It’s not all doom and gloom in there”, he said back to his chipper self.

She grinned and immediately reached for an old soccer medal resting at the top of the box. 

“You played soccer? You hate running.” She said laughing. 

“2005 state championship medal actually, no big deal. Fun fact, if I didn’t enlist, I had a full ride waiting for me at University of Chicago.”

She looked impressed, “What really? Wow, I had no idea. A varsity athlete huh.” She poked his side.

“There’s a lot you don’t know about me”, he teased.

“Apparently”, she replied, dumbfounded, suddenly thinking about the timeline of their lives. They could have met so much sooner, how interesting that would have been.  
The University of Chicago connection was not lost on her, maybe the universe was telling them something. She wasn’t even sure Jay knew that she went to school there.

“I wonder if we would have crossed paths back then. That’s where I did my degree”, she smiled slowly.

Jay chuckled, of course she went there. “In another lifetime, I think we would have. And I bet we would have been as close then as we are now.” 

He voiced what she was feeling about this newfound coincidence. She felt like she’s known Jay her whole life, like maybe in a past life they were friends, their souls always reaching out to find each other. 

She nodded in agreement and moved on through the box. Most of it was old pictures of friends and family, little trinkets, his police academy acceptance letter, his army patches, and other memories from years past. She stopped at a photo of Jay and his mom, realizing she had never seen a picture of her before, she was breathtaking. She flashed her dimples again, slowly analyzing the picture. Jay was young, maybe 10, and his mom was kneeling down behind him with her arm wrapped around his shoulder. They both had the biggest smiles on their faces. 

“You have your mom’s eyes”, she said softly.

He nodded, smiling, but with a sadness behind it. 

“Even at the end, her eyes still sparkled like that.”

“She was so beautiful Jay, it looks like you were really happy here”, she said squeezing his knee.

“She would have loved you, you guys are a lot alike”, he quietly admitted and smiled back, more genuine this time. 

She carefully placed that picture back in the box, touched by what he just told her, and took one more out before he was going to put it away, she couldn’t resist. 

“Baby Jay and Baby Will! I can’t”, she gleamed. The two boys were hugging each other in someone’s backyard, Will’s fiery red hair poking out from under a Cub’s baseball hat. Neither of them could have been older than 3 and 5 give or take. 

Jay giggled, “Let me see that, I forgot about this one. Will used to be so cute, not sure what happened.”

They both broke out laughing, “I’m going to tell him you said that”, Hailey replied.  
Jay shook his head and took the box back to his room. Hailey was grateful he shared those memories with her tonight, the good and the bad ones. She had a better understanding of who he was now. They finished their tea and didn’t realize how late it actually was.

“Holy, 4 in the morning, we have to get a few hours of shut eye here”, Jay stated.

She looked surprised at the time, “Oh wow. You’re right. Power nap, I’ll take the couch.”

He looked at her with an eyebrow raise. “Hailey, I think tonight of all nights, it would be okay for you to stay in my bed with me.”

She suddenly looked a little shy, thinking about sleeping in his bed with him after the night they just had made her blush. 

“No funny business though”, he jokingly warned her, wanting to ease her nerves, he could see it all across her face.

She laughed at that, “Right. You have been puking for the last 12 hours. So kissing is off the table. I’ll be content with our usual.”

“Our usual eh”, he said raising his eyebrows, teasing her in the slightest.

“Oh shut up. Let’s go to bed, I’m tired”, she rolled her eyes sarcastically.

They retreated back to Jay’s room, ready for some rest. They had no idea what kind of chaos the next 24 hours were about to bring, and potentially define the rest of their careers along with it. 

They woke up a few hours later to a message from Voight. They were all needed down at the district ASAP. They made coffee and grabbed a bite to eat. 

Hailey didn’t have any extra clothes since she came straight to Jay’s after work. She was kicking herself for not having her usual spare bag in her car.

“You can borrow one of my shirt’s if you’d like…”, Jay said slowly grinning, knowing what the rest of the team would be thinking once they saw her. 

Hailey laughed, “I’m blaming this on you.” Things suddenly felt very domestic, the two of them getting ready for work together, chatting over breakfast, all they could do was laugh about it.

“I will take full responsibility”, Jay replied. Her shirt got a little messy last night from looking after him in the bathroom. She picked a denim button up, something that was similar to her own style as it turned out. It was noticeably baggy on her, but at first glance, not obviously Jay’s shirt. Well, it would be obvious to the team, but at this point this was her best and only option.

She got dressed first and went out to the kitchen to get coffee. She heard the doorknob turn, and Will stroll in after his shift. 

“Oh. Good morning”, he said somewhat surprised to see Hailey in their kitchen at this hour.

“Morning Will”, she replied back, with a look in her eye almost challenging him to bring up the elephant in the room.

“Coffee?” He decided not to ask. 

“There’s some left in the pot, it’s fresh I just put it on. We have to get going.”

“Is Jay alright?” Will blurted out, quietly so that Jay wouldn’t hear him.

“Um yeah. He had a bit of food poisoning yesterday…”

“No, that’s not what I mean”, he shook his head as he cut her off. He knew he didn’t have much time before Jay would come out of his room.

Hailey looked at Will blankly.

“He thinks I don’t know what yesterday was. But I do. And I have a feeling you do too”, he tested her.

The look on her face told Will all he needed to know, confirming his suspicions. He never asked Jay about it, ever. Jay had let it slip one night when he was drunk, after one of his many binges post tours. He was upset, and the fear and pain in his eyes told Will that he could never ask him about this, Jay had to be the one to bring it up. But he never did. Will always made a mental note to check in on him on this anniversary. He wasn’t sure if Jay knew that he knew, but he secretly hoped he did. He felt guilty for not being there for his brother when he needed him most, he was trying to make up for lost time where he could. He did some quick math and realized this would have been the 10th year since it happened, yesterday must have been really hard for Jay.

Hailey stepped closer to Will and half smiled. “I know. He’s going to be okay”, she whispered. Will patted her on the back in reply, thanking her.

Jay rushed out of his room to find Hailey and his brother talking over coffee. Will had this strange look about him, Jay was sure he was wondering why Hailey was here, but there would be time to explain all of that later.

“Morning sunshine”, Jay smiled at Will.   
“Mmmm”, Will grumbled. “Back to bed for me as soon as the two of you leave.” He eyed them suspiciously, especially when Jay moved past Hailey to grab a travel mug, the way he gently put his hand on her back. Something was different here. He was too tired to process it though.

“Hailey, we gotta go. Atwater is doing a meet up with a CI and drug dealer. Looks like I may have to put my B & E skills to use again”, they both laughed as they headed out the door. 

They walked into the district together and greeted Platt at the front desk. Trudy looked to Hailey, clearly whatever was going on with the two of them yesterday had been resolved.

“Good morning Detectives. Halstead, how are you feeling?”

“Much better Sarge, thanks”, Jay said as he set a latte down on her desk. “For looking after me yesterday”, he smirked.

Platt grinned, “Thanks. Next time, you should probably listen to me about the leftovers.”

“Copy that”, Jay laughed and turned to make his way upstairs with Hailey.

“Hey Upton”, Platt called and Hailey turned back to look at the desk.

“Ya Sarge.”

“Nice shirt”, Platt sipped her coffee cheekily as Hailey turned back around with an eye roll and a smile.

The team was already in full swing by the time Hailey and Jay made their way upstairs, Voight was filling them in on a way they could potentially derail Kelton becoming Mayor. During this meeting, everyone couldn’t help but notice Hailey and Jay had strolled in late with coffee, and Hailey was wearing on of Jay’s shirts. Even Voight laughed a little bit when he saw them. The look on both their faces screamed don’t ask, so they left it for the time being. There were bigger issues at hand. 

They had less than 24 hours until the election now and it was all hands on deck, the future of Intelligence, and several of it’s members, depended on it. Atwater had set up a meeting with Wilson, Kelton’s go to gang banger, through one of his CI’s. The rest of the team would work surveillance. They headed off to the park to put their plan in motion. 

The unit, minus Antonio and Voight were in the locker room getting ready to head out. Kim couldn’t hold back anymore and laughed at Hailey, who already knew where this was going so she decided to make the best of it. The rest of the team was also snickering, Jay included.

“Nice shirt Hailey, does it come in men’s?” Adam could hardly get that out before he was doubled over at his locker, giggling at his own joke. 

“Alright, alright everyone. Yes I am wearing Jay’s shirt, yes it is because I stayed at his place last night. And if you are wondering, yes it is also because he was sick as a dog and may or may not have thrown up on me.”

“Jay you didn’t”, Ruzek couldn’t stop laughing. 

Jay shrugged his shoulders and chuckled, “All I can say is Hailey took one for the team last night. And also I am never eating chicken salad ever again.”

They all laughed for a few minutes, making jokes at Hailey and Jay’s expense. Commenting on whether or not this called for signing HR forms, and if a denim on denim look was in fact fashionable. 

“Actually, this is what you would call a Canadian tuxedo, ever heard of it?” Hailey was poking fun at herself now. It was nice to laugh it out with everyone before starting their day, the team had no idea what was in store for them over the next few hours. This light hearted time together would prove valuable and something to cherish later on. 

Kim, who overheard their argument yesterday, was glad that they seemed to have worked things out. Hailey clearly stayed the night at Jay’s and took care of him, and as much as they were joking about it now, they must have had some sort of heart to heart. Their energy seemed different today. She hadn’t seen Jay joke around and laugh like this in a long time, probably since before Erin left. They got all their jokes out and geared up for a long day ahead, one for the ages.

The stint at the park ended in a close call for all of them. Hailey drove her car into some garbage barrels to cause a distraction and buy Jay some more time to plant the tracking and listening devices in Wilson’s car. Thankfully, it worked, and Intelligence met back at the district to review their next plans. No one really knew why Voight was going after Wilson so hard, but they went along with it. Hailey cautiously looked to Adam and he nodded at her, confirming her fears that this had everything to do with covering up for Antonio, and not so much sticking it to Kelton. Hailey suddenly felt a new sense of urgency with this case, they had to find something. They had to make this work.

Jay couldn’t help but notice Hailey’s behaviour towards Adam had changed for today. There was clearly something going on here, but he just couldn’t put his finger on it. Antonio, Adam and Voight were acting especially jumpy today. An old saying crept into his mind, “If you can stay friends after a break-up, either you’re still in love, or you never were.” He was selfishly hoping for the latter.

To their delight, later in the day they found a way in to nail Wilson. They would pull of a rip and gut his stash house, forcing him to contact his supplier for a huge shipment of drugs. There was no way Wilson would be able to weasel his way out of this. The plan went smoothly, Kim commenting on how fun it was to be a criminal for a day. The team agreed and smiled in disbelief that they actually pulled that off. 

“Step on it Trudy”, Voight yelled to their getaway driver. That got a laugh out of the back of the van, and suddenly they felt back in control of this election situation. They were holding the cards now, or so they thought.

Hailey and Jay were taking inventory of the drugs they seized, eyes wide at how much they actually got away with.

“A 500k rip, that we can’t even tell anyone about!” Hailey exclaimed.

“Ya well, we might be writing traffic tickets again soon, so I’m savouring this sort of wild operation while we can.”

“Would your Sergeant in organized crimes take you back?” She fished.

Jay shook his head and smirked. “No, that guy was so pissed when I left. Besides, I’m going where you go.”

“Yeah?” Hailey half asked, half stated the obvious. “That was very, I’d follow you blind Jay.”

He turned and smiled at her, he knew she was teasing. As if there were any doubts he would want to stick with her. “Ya, it’s hard to find a good partner. I’ll keep you.” She playfully swatted his shoulder and continued on with the inventory. 

The day turned into night, and into morning again. Kim and Hailey called everyone in when they picked up action on Wilson’s wire. The team had decided to stick together and pull an all-nighter at the station, and had been taking turns sleeping and listening for any wire activity. This was too important to not put all of their energy into it. Wilson was clearly angry he got robbed and called his supplier, Trey Guerrero, for an urgent re-stock. Voight looked at Adam and Antonio, who were visibly exhausted, but suddenly felt a surge of energy, of hope. 

“This is it. This is how we take down Kelton”, Voight stated. “Gear up let’s get to that meeting with Wilson and Guerrero.” 

Everyone had split up in anticipation of Wilson’s arrival. Jay felt uneasy though, something didn’t feel right about this. He didn’t know exactly what was going on, but this felt more personal than Voight was letting on. Adam, Kim and Kev were in position, Hailey and Jay were close by in a surveillance van. Before Jay could voice his opinion on why this felt a little off, they heard gun shots. Hailey instinctively reached for her gun, but Jay heard how close the shots were and his army brain took over. Before Hailey could react, Jay lunged at her, pushing her to the floor, shielding her body with his, as bullets riddled the side of their van. For a split second, he felt his PTSD symptoms begin to creep in, the shakiness, his heart was pounding in his chest. He was trying to force down the flashbacks from the desert that were threatening to come to the surface. Not now, he thought. Only this time, he wasn’t imagining things, they were really under attack here in Chicago, and the person he cherished most was in grave danger. He needed to pull himself together, and quick. Their lives depended on it.


	20. Tell them you're my wife if you have to

Chapter 20

It happened so quickly, Jay didn’t have time to second guess himself. There was no way this is how they were going out. They just told each other how they felt about one another, he couldn’t bear to lose Hailey, especially not today in the back of this van. He grabbed a Kevlar vest and held it against her back, trying to protect her as much as he possibly could. She buried her head against his chest as he pulled her close and tried to cover any exposed areas of her body with his instead. He had been in plenty of fire fights before, but this one was too close to home. There was debris flying everywhere, and all they could do was lay there and hope nothing hit them. What felt like an hour really only lasted for a few seconds. They finally heard silence from the automatic weapon that was assaulting them, and Jay let out a breath. He immediately looked down at Hailey, who was usually calm, but now he felt her shaking with fear in his arms.

“Are you okay? Are you hit anywhere?” He asked with panic in his voice, he was still holding onto her for dear life. 

Hailey shook her head back at him, “I don’t think so, you?” She gave his body a once over, running her hands over him, and let out a sigh of relief that somehow they avoided serious injury or even worse, death.

They stayed lying there on the floor for a few seconds before Voight’s voice brought them back to reality. He ran over to the van, fearing the worst for his Detectives when he saw how many bullet holes pierced the side of it.

“Jay, Hailey! Are you okay?!” He shouted nervously.

“We’re good, we’re good!” Jay yelled back.

“Okay, stay in there until we get the all clear, the rest of the team went to chase the shooter.”

Hailey looked up at Jay, who still had his hands instinctively clutched around her, protecting her. It wasn’t lost on either of them that they cheated death today. He gave himself a few seconds to collect himself before deciding to pull Hailey just a few inches closer until he felt her heart beating against his chest, confirming she really was okay. He planted a soft kiss on her forehead and she allowed her body to relax into his. Jay felt strangely calm considering what had just happened to them. He reacted instinctively, and didn’t have time to be scared. He was just relieved Hailey was safe. They stayed in that position, silently, listening to each other’s breathing level out, until the back door of the van opened and they remembered where they were. Atwater, Kim and Adam were standing in shock at how close they came to losing two members of their unit today. They saw Hailey and Jay huddled together on the floor, glass and bullets littered all around them.

“Oh my God, Jay, Hailey, are you guys alright?!” Adam asked in a panicked voice, not even the least bit concerned about how they were lying so closely together.

They peeled themselves off of one another, getting the signal that it was all clear to come out. 

“We’re okay.” Hailey confirmed as she sat up and looked under Jay’s jacket, and felt his back just to make sure. She made her way out first. 

“Watch the glass”, Kevin said as he helped her out and checked her over himself, shaking his head while looking at the van then back to her and Jay. Adam and Kim did the same for Jay, Adam’s face was pale the entire time. The rest of them didn’t know how much he needed this case to work in his favour. But he would rather go to jail than risk the lives of anyone in the unit for this. 

“We’re fine buddy”, Jay tried to smile as he put a hand on his shoulder. Adam was still looking the two of them up and down, not convinced there weren’t any bullet holes in them.

Adam and Kim both exhaled loudly. “Thank God.”

“Maybe it was the Canadian tuxedo that kept us safe”, Hailey blurted out, which made them all look around at each other and surprisingly let out a small group chuckle. They needed that to break the tension of what just happened.

“So what the hell was that? I think this was a set up”, Jay said. 

Kim spoke up, “Shooter got away. Patrol is canvassing the area now. Something feels off about this whole thing,” she said quietly. They all nodded in agreement. Adam had snuck away to talk to Antonio, and out of the corner of everyone’s eye, they noticed the two of them fighting. Jay ran over to break things up, tension was starting to bubble over with this case. 

“How about saying thank you?!” Adam yelled as he shoved Antonio.

“He shot at Jay and Hailey! Look at that van! They could have been killed!” Adam continued yelling, Jay was trying to hold him back but he was really angry. Voight had to step in and give them all a talking to in a back alley. After their emotions calmed down, they agreed to regroup and figure things out back at the station. They were back at square one.

The day dragged on. No one had gone home, Jay’s shirt, which was once the joke of the day, suddenly felt like a security blanket for Hailey. Things got way out of hand this afternoon, she felt shaken still. It wasn’t lost on her that Jay had a total disregard for his own safety and his first and only instinct was to protect her, to save her at all costs. She didn’t want to imagine a world without Jay in it. It scared her that he would risk his life for her like that. Although, she would do the same for him, and she hoped he knew that.

Hours later, they arrested the shooter and brought him in for questioning. The cage was calling his name. Adam and Voight took a run at him but the kid knew nothing, he wouldn’t crack. Another dead end. Frustration replaced the optimism that they once felt this morning. Then, just like that, it was all over the news, Kelton won. He was the new Mayor of Chicago. They stood around the TV in disbelief, unsure what this would mean for this unit, or their careers moving forward. Time had run out.

“What’s our next move?” Kim quietly asked. Anything to break the eerie silence filling their bullpen right now.

“I’ll do whatever I can to make sure he doesn’t ruin your careers, or disband Intelligence”, Voight announced. He sounded defeated, the rest of them couldn’t believe this was happening. He walked downstairs, to do what had to be done.

Jay was in the basement when he overheard Adam and Voight yelling in the stairwell. He ran up to see what was going on. He was starting to piece together why the two of them and Antonio were acting so strangely. He thought back to another stairwell argument he walked in on between Hailey and Adam, and he feared the worst. That it was about the same thing they were yelling at. He didn’t want to believe Adam did that, how could he throw everything away?

He caught up to Voight who was trying to storm off. Jay had a rush of confidence and decided to confront Voight and try to get the truth out of him.

“Hank! You have to tell me what’s going on. So I can help you”, Jay yelled and pleaded.

Voight was taken aback by his young Detective’s assertiveness, Jay never called him Hank. He almost grinned. It showed how much Jay had grown over these last few years. When he was dating Erin, he would have never dreamed of calling his boss by his first name, he was too afraid to. But now, he felt like he owed it to him to help him. Voight had saved his ass more times than he could count, it was Jay’s time to pay it forward.

Voight was honest with him and told Jay he was going to see Kelton to do what had to be done, whatever that meant. Jay almost didn’t want to ask. 

“Jay, this unit is going to be yours one day. Do it the right way”, Voight replied, knowing Intelligence would be in good hands with Jay at the wheel. He was a born leader. He proved that everyday. 

Jay stood there in shock and in silence, letting what Voight just said soak in. This was too much, too soon. He couldn’t possibly be doing what Jay thought he was going to do…

Hailey noticed Jay solemnly march up the stairs and head straight for the lunch room, his eyes looking empty. He barely noticed anyone else in the room. She followed him and found him hunched over the sink, his knuckles white from gripping the counter tops.

“Hey what’s going on?” She gently put a hand on his back.

Jay let out a deep breathe. “I have no idea Hailey”, he turned to face her. “Voight told me he was going to see Kelton, and that the unit would be mine one day”, he confessed quietly as his voice waivered. Hailey’s eyes widened at that comment. Not surprised that Jay would be the new leader, but just by the entire situation. This was escalating quickly.

He started breathing heavier and looked down at the floor upset. “We lost.”

She nodded silently for a moment. “Kelton is who he is, his time for reckoning is coming.”

“Not in time for this unit…..For us”, Jay’s expression softened as he locked eyes with Hailey, the two of them knowing that their time as partners was probably coming to an end and life as they knew it was about to change drastically.

“Jay, we’ve only been partners for a few years. You’ll get another partner and forget about me just fine.” 

“Hailey…”, he shook his head, his eyes showing all the frustration he felt. He wanted to say more, but couldn’t find the words. Hailey knew what he meant, all he had to do was look at her and she got it. But she said it trying to protect her heart, to protect him too. What would this do to whatever they had going here? It would hurt more than anything to lose Jay as a partner. Maybe confessing their feelings was a mistake. 

She considers this for a brief second, but knows deep down that it wasn’t a mistake telling Jay she loved him. Maybe they were just naive to think that they could function in this fantasy world of being partners at work and also be dating and live their happily ever after without any conflicts. She knew Jay would fight for her, and try to keep her in this unit at all costs. 

“We’ll be alright”, she whispered and nodded at him, telling him they would be alright outside of work too. She knew they would be able to figure it out. Their moment in the kitchen was interrupted by Trudy coming upstairs and telling Adam IAD was here to arrest him. Jay’s face went blank, Hailey instantly went into protective mode along with Kim and Kevin.

“No, you don’t have to go down there”, she said as she tried to stop him from putting his jacket on.

“It’s okay Hailey.” He looked back at her, Hailey felt sick to her stomach, she knew what this was about. She tried to help Adam, she really did. She looked at Antonio with rage, it did not go unnoticed by Jay. 

Suddenly it all clicked for Jay, Adam took the fall, and refused to give up Antonio, whose hands appeared tied. Absolutely everything depended on Kelton not getting elected. Everything they did today, this week, was to try and get them out of this bind, but they failed. Jay didn’t know if he should feel angry, sad, or kept in the dark. He took a deep breathe and realized that his time for leading the unit may come sooner rather than later and it scared the hell out of him.

Adam seemed the most cool calm and collected out of all of them, considering what was about to happen. He said his good-bye’s, not wanting any of them to come downstairs except for Platt. Once he left, Jay, Hailey, Antonio, Kevin and Kim stood in the bull pen, staring at one another in disbelief. What the hell just happened. 

The team parted ways shortly after. Emotions were at an all time high and they hadn’t slept or rested in a few days really. Everyone needed to recharge and collect themselves after the events of today. Antonio left in a hurry, and Kim and Kevin went home together, both looking incredibly upset, which was to be expected. That left Hailey and Jay staring at each other from across their desks.

“Did you know?” Jay asked quietly.

“Not the full story. I didn’t think it would come to this”, Hailey said through tears.

“I went to Voight a few months ago, to try and help Adam, to get him to take back his statement. What happened at the warehouse that day. I can’t believe this… What do we do now? He can’t go to jail Jay. He’s a cop.” Hailey had her head in her hands, quietly crying, overwhelmed with emotion. Her and Adam didn’t work out, but that didn’t mean she didn’t care about him still. She was genuinely worried for his safety in there.

Jay reached over and put a hand on her arm, “I know. I’m worried about him too. But for right now, I think we should go home and re-group. Adam is still being processed. We’ll figure out how to get him out in the morning. There’s nothing we can do tonight.”

She knew he was right. “Voight will find a way, he always does. He has to.” Hailey replied.

Jay wasn’t so sure. He didn’t have the heart to tell her he couldn’t get a hold of Voight, his phone went straight to voicemail the three times he tried to call, and he had a bad feeling about it. His instincts were usually right.

Hailey sighed and pulled herself up from her desk chair. 

“Beers?” Jay inquired, for once feeling like he didn’t know what she was thinking.

She looked up at him and replied, “I think I need to be alone tonight. Sorry. I just, I just need to clear my head.”

“I get it. As long as you’re okay? Promise?” He asked, understanding why she wanted to rain check. 

“Promise. I’ll talk to you later.” She headed for the stairs. That left Jay sitting at his desk, just outside of Voight’s office, feeling a new sense of responsibility, but also unsettled at the same time. Little did he know, hours later he would need to act on it.

Hailey locked the door to her house behind her, leaving all of her stuff at the front door and headed straight for her room. She was drained. The last few days had been a wild ride and in a million years, could have never predicted what went down today. She took a sleeping pill, in desperate need for some uninterrupted rest, and to help with her insomnia. It was just past 6, but she didn’t care, she didn’t even feel like eating. Her mind was racing and all she wanted to do was sleep, numb everything she was feeling and forget about it. The pill slowly took effect and her eyelids got heavier and heavier before she drifted off into a deep slumber.

She was woken up hours later by her phone ringing and ringing and ringing. She looked at the time first, 11 o’clock. So she had at least slept for 5 hours, which was better than nothing. Jay’s name popped up as all of her missed calls and text messages, and from a quick glance looked like there was a lot of them. She had just missed the last call. She was wondering why he would be calling her this late, he knew she wanted to go home and unplug and sleep. There must be a good reason for this. She called him back and he picked up barely after one ring. 

“Hailey!” He sounded out of breath.

“Jay, what’s going on?”

“I’ve been trying to get a hold of you…”

“I know, I’m sorry, I took a sleeping pill. Is everything alright?” She was still half asleep, trying to focus on what he was saying.

“No, no it’s not.” Jay sounded frantic, which caused her to wake up a little.

“Jay, what’s wrong?!” She asked again trying to get him to spit it out. 

“Hailey listen to me. It’s obvious you haven’t checked your phone. When you do, don’t freak out. I’m heading over to the scene now, this is bad Hails. But one of us needs to be with Will, I think it should be you. I don’t want him waking up alone. Talk to Agent Lee to get information, she’s with the FBI, lie and tell them you’re my wife if you have to. Bring your gun, he needs armed security at his room.”

Jay was rambling, and Hailey’s brain was in a fog, FBI, for Will? She was barely registering what Jay was saying as she quickly hopped out of bed and wiggled into some clothes. 

“What happened to Will? Is he alright?” She felt the panic setting in now.

“There was an accident in the hospital parking lot at Med. He got hit by a car, on purpose. Natalie was with him, she’s hurt too. I was at Med when I got the call about Kelton, but didn’t get a chance to see Will. I’ll explain everything later. I don’t really know the full story yet.”

Hailey quickly checked the unread texts from Jay about Kelton, her eyes nearly popping out of her head afterwards.

“Holy shit. Jay, Kelton is dead?!” 

“Yes, he’s really dead. Kim and Kevin are here, no one can find Antonio. Please just tell me you’ll go take care of Will.”

“Of course I’ll go be with Will. But are you sure I’m not needed at the crime scene, does Voight know I’m going to the hospital instead?” 

“Hailey, I’m the acting Sergeant right now.”

The wheels were spinning in her head. “Oh.” It finally clicked. “Oh my God Jay do you think…?” Now she was really in a panic. Adam was in jail, Voight told Jay he was going to Kelton’s, no one had heard from Antonio… 

“I don’t know Hails, I really don’t. But I have to be at the crime scene, probably for most of the night. I’m worried about Will, I don’t know how serious his injuries are. Nat’s in really bad shape. Owen….crap Owen.” Jays brain was moving a mile a minute.

“It’s okay Jay, slow down, I’ll handle all of that don’t worry.”

“Okay thanks. It’s just…Will is all I have left now…you know?” Jay’s voice got very quiet.

“I know Jay, I know. He’s going to be alright. Don’t worry about that, I’ll stay the whole night if I have to.” She wanted to reach out through the phone and give Jay a hug right then and there, she could hear it in his voice that he was scared. He wasn’t always the best at voicing how much he cared for his brother, but what he said was true. They were the only family each other had left.

“I signed something to say that you were coming and if anything happens had permission to grant surgery, okay, if it comes to it. I’m sure they’re going to do it regardless, since it’s Will he works there they know him, but just in case things go south okay?” Jay continued his ramble.

“Ya of course. I’m heading there right now. Call me with any updates alright?” Jay promised he would and she ended the call to try and process what was happening. 

Hailey rubbed her eyes, trying to adjust herself and let it sink in that this was real and she wasn’t dreaming. What are the odds that the Mayor of Chicago was just murdered at the same time her partner’s brother was lying in a hospital bed across town? One that he worked at, and was attacked at for that matter. She was torn about her duty to serve and protect, feeling like she needed to be at that crime scene as well. But in the end, what mattered more to her was that Will needed her, the only family Jay has left. The fact that Jay picked her to make sure Will was okay showed just how much he trusted her. Nothing is more important than that, than family. Hailey didn’t consider herself to be a religious person, but found herself praying to whoever was listening that Will and Natalie would pull through. She hurried down her stairs, grabbed her keys and wallet off the counter and rushed over to Med as fast as she could.


	21. The sister I never had

Chapter 21

Hailey stormed through the Emergency Department doors, looking around for anyone who could give her an update on Will and Natalie, it was chaos in there. She eventually came across Maggie, in plain clothes, running the desk at the nurses station still. She must have gone home and come back, or at the very least stayed after her shift. She looked shaken up herself.

“Hey Maggie”, Hailey put her hand on her arm. “I’m here for Will. Jay got called out on something urgent.”

“Of course. Let’s go somewhere private.”

Maggie pulled her into a hallway and tried to explain best what was going on. Will had a broken wrist and a pretty serious head injury. Natalie…she couldn’t tell her very much because of confidentiality reasons, but Hailey knew by the look on Maggie’s face that it wasn’t good.

“Owen?” Hailey inquired.

“He’s still at the daycare. But it’s late and he’s scared. I think he knows something is wrong, this isn’t his usual routine. He thinks his mom is helping someone, that something big came up…” Maggie’s voice broke. Hailey rubbed her arm comforting her. 

“I’ve called Owen’s grandma, Helen, she’s on her way here. Trying to get in touch with Nat’s parents out West, but no luck yet.”

“Alright. Please let me know if I can do anything. Can you bring me to Will’s room?”

Maggie nodded and brought Hailey up to his room. She could hear him moaning in pain, asking for Natalie, Jay, overall just inconsolable. She was alarmed by all the FBI agents outside of his door, she had no idea what was going on here. Mental note to ask Jay about this later on.

An agent with “Lee” written across her vest stopped her at the door. 

“Whoa, I need to see some identification.”

“Jay Halstead is my partner”, was the first thing she blurted out.

“Romantically…?” Agent Lee inquired.

“Professionally”, Hailey replied with a bit of attitude and quickly flashed her own badge. “Detective Upton CPD”, guess she wasn’t going to be able to use the married card, although that would have been quite amusing. 

Agent Lee nodded and the agents behind her relaxed a bit. 

“How is he? What’s going on”, Hailey asked.

“Will was involved with us on an operation back in the fall. Long story short, someone he helped put away just got out of prison, followed him here and waited for him to get off shift. He ran his car into Will’s, Dr. Manning was inside, and the door was open so she was ejected. Clear intent to injure or pre-meditated attempted murder, depending on how Dr. Manning pulls through... Agent Lee trailed off, with a hint of guilt in her voice. Will is alright given the circumstances, but they’re keeping him in for observation, broken wrist, nasty cut on his head and a concussion. He might need surgery on his wrist too we’re not sure yet. We have the offender in custody, but his family is well connected, so…this is a safety issue.” Hailey knew what that really meant, mafia, so she just nodded. What was Nat doing in Will’s car with the door open after shift? So many questions about things happening all over the city tonight.

“You’re carrying?” Lee changed the subject.

Hailey nodded. “Ok good, my guys need a break here, we have some things to look into now with this case. But I’ll leave one behind at the door just in case. Will hasn’t let anyone in his room without freaking out by the way, so don’t be alarmed when you see him. The nurses haven’t been able to get him cleaned up yet.” Agent Lee walked away and turned down the hall with the rest of her unit, leaving one agent behind for extra security as promised.

This was all too surreal. Hailey opened the door to Will’s room, his face was still covered in blood, like something out of a horror movie. 

“Will…, it’s Hailey”, she said quietly as she took in the severity of his injuries and sat down at his bedside, alarmed at his appearance, that was a lot of blood, mostly his, but perhaps some of it was Natalie’s. She kept trying to remind herself that face and head injuries always bled more, and that they often weren’t as serious as they looked.

He looked at her and she could tell by the look in his eyes that he was concussed, he had cuts all over his face, his eyes red from crying.

“Do you know how Natalie is?” He asked her frantically, she still wasn’t sure if he even processed who she was yet.

“I’m sorry Will, I don’t. I’m not family so they can’t release anything. Helen is on her way here to get Owen, hopefully we’ll know in a bit.”  
Will just started crying, he was in shock. Hailey placed her hand on his shoulder to comfort him. 

“It’s going to be alright Will, they have the best people working on her.”

“Hailey you don’t understand this is all my fault”, he was breathing heavily, mumbling other things- about their wedding, someone named Ray, Arizona, and being kidnapped. Hailey had no clue what he was talking about, but just listened and consoled him. She wondered if it was the concussion, or if this really happened and she was very out of the loop. 

“Where’s Jay? I need to talk to Jay.”

“Jay had to rush to a crime scene, it was urgent. Superintendent….err…Mayor Kelton was just found murdered”, she said in a hushed tone. 

“What?” Will’s eyes nearly popped out of his head.

“Shh, shh I know. I don’t know what’s going on yet, but it’s not looking good. Ruzek was arrested today. Antonio and Voight are in the wind. Our unit is in trouble. Jay is acting Sergeant right now”, Hailey told him more than she should, but this was an exceptional circumstance. She needed to say it out loud partially for herself, to remind her that today actually happened. 

Will stared at her wide eyed, not knowing what to do with that information, he already felt like he was going to throw up, which he did seconds later. Thankfully Hailey saw the warning signs and had a basin ready.

“Sorry”, he said afterwards.

“It’s okay Will, this is nothing. You should have seen your brother the other night. I think he’s sworn off chicken salad for life.” She said while rubbing his back. 

That got Will’s mind off of things for a second and he let out a small laugh. 

“He wanted to be here with you, trust me. But he sent me in his place. I hope that’s alright.”

“Of course it is”, Will sniffled. “You’re practically family anyways.”

Hailey smiled at him, thinking about how they had become something like the three musketeers at this point. 

“I’m going to try and get you cleaned up, is that okay?” She asked softly as she grabbed a damp cloth to wipe some of the dried blood away. Will nodded and started crying again, he couldn’t help himself. The sobbing continued the entire time she was trying to wipe the blood caked on his face and soaked into his hairline, all the while being mindful of his staples and sore face. “Hailey I don’t know what I’ll do if she, if she…”

“I know, shhh, shhh”, she said while rubbing his back. “Everything’s going to be okay.”

“Am I in danger? Did they get Tim? Is he dead? There’s got to be others out there looking for me now”, Will was getting paranoid and really worked up, neither good for his current state. His monitors started beeping which alarmed Hailey. He seemed a bit disoriented too. 

“Will, Will, listen to me. Take a deep breath okay, let’s focus on one thing at a time. Natalie is alive and being taken care of as we speak. But I want to make sure you’re okay too”, she said nervously. His head looked bad, she could see 7 staples, there might even be more hiding in his hair. His wrist was in a splint, and it was red where the bone was nearly broken through his skin. There wasn’t much she could do about that so instead she grabbed the bag of ice sitting next to his bed and gently pressed it against his cheek bone. The imprint of the car doorframe was visibly bruising into his face already. It took a few minutes, but his breathing eventually calmed down a bit, and Hailey kept reassuring him that things were going to be alright.

“There, that’s it. You’re okay. I’m going to stay here with you the whole time. I have my gun with me, there’s FBI agents watching your door. You’re safe here.”

April came in to let Will know they were taking him to get his wrist set. April gave Hailey a sympathetic look, she was visibly upset too. 

They wheeled Will down the hall towards another room. His X-rays showed that he wasn’t going to need surgery, but they would be giving him anaesthesia so that they could set the bone, it would be too painful otherwise. 

Hailey walked with him as far as she could and told him she would be waiting for him when he got out. She took this time to try and call Jay. It rang and rang and rang, no answer. She left him a voicemail and hoped he would call her back soon. It was just after 1 in the morning, and judging by the high profile nature of this, he likely wouldn’t be leaving the scene until dawn. Not to mention he was in charge now, so that came with a lot of other responsibilities. 

Hailey had grabbed a coffee in the mean time, and was trying to keep busy. She also tried called Kim and Kevin too, no answer from them either. She texted Jay once more just to give him an update on Will, hoping he would read it and at least put his mind at ease. Will didn’t need any surgery but they are keeping him in overnight. He has a pretty bad concussion, and a broken wrist. Still no word on Natalie. I’m staying here with him. Call me as soon as you can. 

Will was rolled back into his room about an hour or so later, sporting a new cast over his left wrist and a sling. Hailey could tell he was still out of it from being put under.  
“Hails”, he slurred as he touched her cheek with his right hand. She had to hold back a laugh, not sure where he got that from, only Jay calls her that. 

“How are you feeling Will?”

“M’head, It hurts”, he whimpered. Hailey looked at April to see what could be done, who shrugged her shoulders in confusion.

“We’ve given him meds for the pain already, but he could be due for another round soon let me check”, she left to go check his chart.

While April stepped out, Ethan and another doctor came back in to provide an update. 

“Detective Upton, this is Dr. Simpson, head of orthopaedics. He set Will’s wrist.” 

“Hi there. Everything went well, he should be able to get his cast off in 4-6 weeks. No lifting with that arm, and I’ve written him a prescription if he needs some pain relief in the next few days. He may need physio afterwards, but so far it looks like a standard clean break.”

“That’s good news. Thank you Dr. Simpson.” Hailey replied.

“He did have some nausea and vomiting coming out of the anaesthesia, which is completely normal, but we gave him some gravol so hopefully that settles things. We can give him more pain medication if he needs it soon as well. May I ask, what is your relationship with Will?”

Ethan also gave her a funny look, he was probably wondering where Jay was. Looks like the media hasn’t broken the Kelton story just yet. Hailey didn’t miss a beat and cleared up the confusion.

“His brother Jay, is my partner. At work”, she added and quickly shot Ethan a glance who seemed to be enjoying watching Hailey squirm.

“Jay couldn’t be here unfortunately, there was an urgent matter he had to attend to. He told me to be here for Will instead. Is there anything you need from me?”

“Ahh right okay. Well, everything went smoothly. I will need you to sign some forms in that case just confirming the procedure, what tests were performed, and that you understand Will’s prognosis moving forward.”

“Ya of course”, Hailey replied as he handed her the papers and she signed her name under Next of Kin. Very odd. She thanked Dr. Simpson as he left the room.

Ethan stayed behind, to make sure Will was okay for a few minutes. He said he was nauseous, so they immediately went over to hold a basin under his mouth. Will was looking pale again. His eyes were closed as he hunched over the basin, nothing coming out. Ethan and Hailey were on either side of the bed, steadying him.

“So are you going to tell me where Jay is? It must be serious if it’s keeping him from being here.” Ethan finally asked quietly, to not disturb Will, who was in his own world swaying slightly in the bed.

Hailey grinned back, “Sorry Dr. Choi. I can’t right now. But I’m sure you will hear about it on the news sooner rather than later.”

“Gotcha. Okay well I’m glad you’re here for Will at least. He was a mess before you got here. Natalie is still in surgery”, he gave her a small hint.

“I know you can’t tell me the exact details, but how bad is it really? Is she going to make it?” Hailey said in a hushed tone, thankfully Will was still a bit loopy and not really paying attention to their conversation.

Ethan’s face fell a little bit. “It is very serious. We are doing the best we can. I’m hopeful that she pulls through, she’s strong.”

Hailey nodded and told Ethan she would be fine here with Will. 

“If he starts throwing up a lot, page me. Otherwise just try and wake him up every so often, we need to watch his concussion. The gravol should kick in soon and he should start to feel a bit better.”

Will calmed down for a bit, which allowed Hailey to get some shut eye. However, about an hour later she woke up to the sound of him dry heaving and was thankful to see April standing over Will.

“Sorry, fell asleep there. How is he?”

“No you’re okay. Looks like you needed some sleep too Detective. The anaesthesia is still wearing off, some people have a hard time with it, not unusual. Might be a redhead thing”, April chuckled, trying to stay positive as she wiped Will’s mouth after he was done being sick.

Hailey was amazed at April’s composure and also compassion. Nursing was hard work, there’s no way Hailey could ever do this. 

“You can call me Hailey”, she smiled at April. “Is there anything I can do?” She asked, while she slowly rubbed Will’s back as he went at it for round two.

“Not much unfortunately, just have to wait for it to get out of his system. The concussion isn’t helping either. You’re okay Will, just get it all out”, April whispered to him.  
Will’s brain felt scrambled, but he still knew where he was. Hailey and April were helping him, his wrist was in a cast, he was safe at the hospital. He was trying to tell himself theses things to make sure he knew what was real and what wasn’t.

“Natalie?” Will asked quietly after the puking was done.

April looked at him, with a few tears in her eyes, “We don’t know yet Will. They’re still working on her”, she told him as she rubbed his back to comfort him.

Will started to cry again at this point, which broke Hailey’s heart. April left the room and brought back a cold compress to put over Will’s forehead. “Try to get some rest okay, I have to do my other rounds. I’ll let you know right away if I hear anything.”

“I need to talk to Jay, please Hailey.” Will pleaded with her.

“I’m sorry Will, I haven’t been able to get a hold of him, or anyone else on the team, either. I’ll keep trying him. I really need to talk to him too. I’m sure he’s going to come here the second he can.”

Will nodded, and Hailey helped him ease back against the bed, placing the compress over his face.

“Thank you for being here Hailey”, Will said as his voice broke. 

“Of course Will. Get some rest okay, I’m right here”, she said as she rubbed the top of his hand with hers. 

“This is what you do for Jay”, he grinned slowly, even in his state, picking up on the hand thing.

That made Hailey smile, but she tried to hide it. “This is what I normally do for your brother, yes. Don’t tell him though he might get jealous” she joked. These Halstead brothers and their hand holding.

“You know that I know you and Jay are in love with each other right?” Will said somewhat randomly.

This caught Hailey off guard, she even laughed a little bit. “Those pain meds have given you some courage I see. But…you aren’t wrong. Your brother is very important to me. Work wise, and otherwise”, she grinned as she saw Will’s mouth turn up into a smile. He likely wouldn’t remember this conversation with her anyways, so she let her guard down temporarily.

“He is so lucky to have you, and I am too. Sister I never had”, Will slurred and held Hailey’s hand back, somehow this touched her more than anything else.

Will finally drifted off to sleep a while later, and so did Hailey.


	22. Mrs. Halstead

Chapter 22

She woke up covered in a blanket lying in the chair next to Will’s bed. Jay had crept in and was standing over her, looking on fondly at his two favourite people in the world. Hailey holding Will’s hand too, it made his heart flutter and also just the slightest bit envious. Will on the other hand didn’t look as cute, it actually made Jay feel a little nauseous to see his brother like this. His arm was in a sling, wrist casted, his face all bruised with remnants of blood in his hair still. So many staples too, Jay hated to think about what happened here tonight.

Hailey opened her eyes and was surprised to see Jay hovering over her. 

“Mrs. Halstead”, he grinned slyly. 

“Save it hubby. Turns out my badge carried more weight with the FBI than a ring on my finger. Go figure”, Hailey whispered cheekily. 

Jay shook his head and let out a laugh, then quickly stifled it, trying not to wake Will. 

“So I take it Agent Lee filled you in?” Jay asked.

Hailey nodded her head yes. “Sort of. What time is it”, she mouthed.

He showed her his phone, 6 am. 

She blinked her eyes a few times in disbelief that she slept that long. Then the panic set in, she had to see if Will was alright. Sensing what she was nervous about, Jay put a hand on her shoulder to sit her back down. “Shhh, Will’s alright, April has been coming in to check on him every hour. She must have covered you with this at some point during the night too”, he smirked.

“How long have you been here?” She questioned.

“About an hour, I let you sleep for as long as I could”, he whispered back.

“Maybe I wouldn’t make such a good nurse after all”, both of them chuckled. She clearly slept through all of that, and Jay coming into the room about an hour before.

“Jay have you slept yet? You look exhausted. Here switch with me, lie down for a bit.” Hailey stood up, slowly releasing Will’s hand from hers, if he was anything like his brother he would be waking up soon. She put her hand on Jay’s arm, forcing him to get off his feet, he looked dead tired. She knew he hadn’t slept much this week at all, even before the events of last night. He sat down reluctantly and she pulled the blankets up, covering his shoulders. She crouched down beside him so they wouldn’t have to talk too loud, hoping to get updates before he passed out.

“I talked to Agent Lee. Tim Burke is back in custody. He’s going back to jail for a long time. Still no news on Natalie, her parents are on a flight in from Seattle. Hopefully we’ll know more soon”, Jay filled her in.

Hailey sighed in relief, that the man who did this was behind bars, but still felt nervous about how this was going to play out. Frankly, for their safety now as well. If this was mafia related and it got out that Will was working with the FBI…She shuddered, trying to prevent her mind from going to darker places than it already was.

“Will was really upset last night, he was in a lot of pain too. He cried most of the night asking for Natalie, it was heartbreaking”, Hailey whispered to Jay.

Jay let out a sigh. “All we can do is be here for him, I’m hopeful that Nat will pull through. I can’t help but feel like this whole thing is my fault”, he confessed.

“Ya I was going to ask about that…FBI Jay? What’s this all about.”

“It’s a long story. But basically Will was going to rent the hall for their wedding from this guy from our old neighbourhood, Ray Burke. He didn’t know he was a gangster, classic Will, so oblivious. But the FBI already had Ray’s phones tapped, and one day they hear a new voice, Will’s, and they realize he’s my brother. Agent Lee approached me to try and get Will to cooperate and be part of their investigation. They’ve been trying to nail Ray for years, Will was the perfect in. He planted a bug, they found it, his son’s kidnapped Will on his wedding day, several other not so great things happened…”

“Wait WHAT? Why didn’t you tell me any of this?” Hailey held up her hand trying to process everything Jay just said. So Will wasn’t mumbling nonsense last night…

“I couldn’t. FBI… Will was in witness protection for a while. After he got back, things ended with him and Nat…but I mean it’s obvious he’s still in love with her. I can’t speak for her, but I would bet it’s mutual. I screwed everything up for him Hailey.”

“Jay this isn’t your fault. Will still made a decision to get involved in this. I just hope everything is over now with that chapter, and he can move on. Him and Natalie both.”

“Me too”, Jay said sleepily. 

“Okay, so second big elephant in the room. Kelton. What the hell happened??” 

Jay’s eyes went wide as if to say “Not here, it isn’t safe.”

“It’s not looking good Hails…” Jay was about to explain when Ethan interrupted. 

“Morning guys”, he said as he saw Hailey awake with Jay now reclined in her chair, looking like he was going to fall asleep any minute. Hailey was knelt down next to him whispering about something.  
Jay perked up to greet Ethan. “Morning.” Hailey got up from kneeling next to Jay to sit on the armrest of the chair he was lying in.

“Will seems to be doing alright. His wrist is good to go, still needs a bit of observation with his head this morning though, but I can discharge him later today. So feel free to make yourselves comfortable, I’ll be back to check on him periodically.”

“Thanks Ethan”, Jay replied and felt his eyes start to drift shut.

Hailey put a hand on Jay’s shoulder, giving it a squeeze, encouraging him to rest. 

“Are you going to be okay to sleep here?” She asked hinting about his nightmares in a roundabout way.

“Ya I’ll be fine. I’m so tired Hailey, I’m going to be out cold any minute now”, he held back a muffled yawn. 

“Okay, I’ll go back to your place and get you and Will some clothes. Rest here for a bit. Will is going to need us when he’s awake.”

Jay nodded at her with his eyes closed. She stayed behind for a few minutes to make sure he was alright, gently rubbing the side of his head and neck as he fell deeper and deeper into sleep. She got up from the arm rest of the chair Jay was sleeping in and quietly went to leave the room. Right before she was going to open the door, she heard Will mumble her name.

Hearing his voice caused her to turn around quickly and go back over to his bedside.  
His eyes were open, a little bit more alert, but glossy. Signs of pain still lingered.

“Hey. How are you feeling?” She whispered, trying not to wake Jay. He would want to see Will too, but there would be plenty of time to catch up later, he needed rest right now.

Will winced as he tried to sit up in bed. Hailey put her hand on his shoulder to stop him.

“Whoa, easy Will. You’re at Med. Your wrist is broken, and you hit your head pretty hard. Try not to move too much okay. Do you remember what happened?”

“Water”, was all Will managed to get out after a long pause.

Hailey looked around and saw a jug with a few cups sitting on a ledge by the window, April must have brought this in at some point. Hailey quietly filled a cup and helped Will take a few small sips. He exhaled deeply, remembering all at once about why he was here. He looked over and saw Jay sleeping peacefully in a recliner beside him, trying to adjust himself to what day and time it was.

“Are you in pain?” Hailey whispered.  
Will closed his eyes and shook his head yes, taking more deep breaths, trying to control the physical and emotional agony he was in. 

Hailey could see he was struggling, so she sat on the bed next to him and gently wiped the tears off his cheeks, trying to keep him as calm as possible. “I’m going to go find a nurse to come in and get you something for the pain alright? I’ll be right back”, she said as she gave his hand a squeeze. She felt bad leaving him even for a few minutes. She was hoping to have heard some good news about Natalie by now to share with him when he woke up, but it wasn’t looking that way just yet. 

April followed her back in, smiling at Jay sleeping next to his brother. He looked like a zombie when he first came to the hospital a few hours ago, he needed some shut eye too by the looks of things. She did a quick check on Will and gave him some medicine to help with the pain and lingering nausea. Will thanked her and slowly started to drift back to sleep, his body craving the rest. April quietly asked Hailey if she was staying, and Hailey explained that she was going home for a bit, to Jay’s place and then back here later with clothes for Will. 

“Um and April, if I were you, I would just leave Jay as is. He gets a little….jumpy…when he’s woken up unexpectedly”, she cautiously warned her.

April understood, she had been with Ethan for a long time and knew Jay was a veteran as well, and what came along with that. Ethan had his good days and bad days, just like many others, it didn’t make her think any less of him. 

“I get it, don’t worry. Ethan is here if anything sets him off.” Hailey nodded, grateful that April knew what she was getting at without having to throw Jay under the bus. 

Both women snuck out of the room and let the two brothers sleep. Hailey left the hospital, taking in a big breath of fresh morning air. It suddenly hit her, how tired she was and how messed up the last 72 hours had really been. She strolled back to her car, trying to digest this new reality they were living in, with so many unknowns. She was so engrossed in her own thoughts that she didn’t see the ominous figure lurking behind some parked cars, following her back to her vehicle.


	23. Protective Custody

Chapter 23

Hailey had stopped in at her favourite coffee shop, then back to her house to pack a bag for a few days. She decided to give up the act and just be honest with herself that she was staying at Jay’s for the next few nights. To help out with Will, she justified to herself.

It wasn’t until she was a few blocks away from Jay’s place that she noticed the black Mercedes in her rear view mirror. Something about the way the car was following her every move made her a little uneasy. Against her better judgment, she continued on her route. However, right before she made the last turn to Jay’s place, she decided to make a few extra turns to get there. To test her theory if she was really being followed or not. You’re just being paranoid, and sleep deprived, she thought. But still, the car followed. Not close enough to be threatening, but for the trained eye, definitely a tail. She’d try to lose them along the next few side streets.

Hailey took a few deep breaths in and continued on her way, hoping they didn’t realize she was on to them. She was trying to remember when she had first noticed the car. She had been to her house right before this…were they following her there too? Now they knew where she lived, whoever they might be, although she had a pretty good idea. She pulled into an alley parking spot tucked behind some trees across from the back entrance of Jay’s building. The Mercedes had yet to catch up. She turned her car off quickly, hoping that it would pass by and not notice where she had gone. Hailey was not new to this, she had spent a lot of time undercover, and knew what it felt like to be followed- but this caught her off guard. How stupid am I, she thought. Chances are whoever they were, if this had to do with the FBI and Will situation, started following her from the hospital. That’s the only theory that made any sense. She should have been more careful, more alert when she was leaving Med. She was kicking herself for going right to her house, and now to Jay’s, this blew where both of them lived, and where Will was staying too. Before she had time to over think anything else, the black car slowly crept past the front of Jay’s apartment building. She saw two men inside, but the windows were tinted and she couldn’t make out a better physical description than that. They were clearly looking for her car, so she sunk down into the driver’s seat, trying not to be seen. 

After coming around the block another couple times, the car sped off, as if it gave up. Hailey’s heart was racing, not sure what she should do in this situation. Normally, she would call Voight, but he was nowhere to be found. Her next thought was Jay, but he was passed out in Will’s hospital room and she didn’t want to make a big deal about this just yet. Plus this might scare Will, something he didn’t need right now. Their team was in such disarray after yesterday that she wasn’t even sure if there still was an Intelligence Unit. She reached into her wallet and pulled out the card Agent Lee gave her last night at Med. She dialled the number on the card, hoping she would pick up.

It took a few rings, but eventually she heard her voice on the other end of the phone.  
“Agent Lee speaking”, she answered professionally.

“Agent Lee, this is Detective Hailey Upton. We met last night at Med, I’m a friend of Will’s”, Hailey replied re-introducing herself. She was sure Lee had a lot on her plate right now.

“Yes that’s right. What can I do for you Detective.”

“You can call me Hailey. Um, this might be nothing, but I want to make sure Will is as safe as possible...”

“Okay. Did something happen?”

“Not necessarily. I left the hospital about an hour ago, Jay is there with Will now. I think I might have been followed back to my house and now to Jay’s. I’m parked outside of his place right now, and I think I’ve lost the tail, but something doesn’t feel right here.” Hailey tried to get all the facts out without sounding scared, but Agent Lee picked up on her nerves.

“Was this a black Mercedes by any chance? C class model? Were you able to get a license plate?” The sudden urgent tone of Lee’s voice made Hailey shiver.

“Yes it was. Not exactly sure of the model. But there were two men inside, I didn’t get a good look. Umm, partial. I think the last few numbers might have been 3579.”

Silence on the other end of the phone and a gulp from Agent Lee. “Okay Hailey. Where are you right now, exactly.”

Hailey told Lee where she parked, in view of Jay’s apartment, but not very visible to cars passing by. 

“Hailey, listen to me. You were right to trust your gut here. Now, I can’t say for sure, but your description matches the vehicle of a known accomplice to Tim Burke. A hit man commonly used by Ray Burke himself. Do you have your gun with you?”

Her response to this made a previously tired Hailey, very wide awake. “Oh my God, a hitman?” She gulped. “Yes I have my gun. I was going to go into Jay’s apartment to grab clothes for him and Will. Should I do that still?” 

Lee pondered this for a few seconds. “Stay where you are. I’m sending a few guys your way. Once they’re with you for backup, I want you to go up the Jay’s place and grab clothes, toiletries, whatever, pack bags for all three of you and meet me back at Med.”

“Do you think anything could be planted in Jay’s apartment? Am I in danger?”

“As of right now, it seems like they were just trying to figure out where Will lived and maybe your relation to him. Chances are they were following Jay this morning as well, you coming out of the hospital and not Jay probably confused them. However, they might try to come back to the hospital now so we can’t take any chances. Did they make you?”

“Hard to say. I think I was discreet enough, but they might have. They looked pretty irritated that they lost my car. Are Will and Jay in danger?”

“Okay. This is good, that means we have some time. They’re probably trying to make the connection between you and Will and Jay. I’m at Med right now, I’ll head upstairs and let Jay know what’s going on. They’re safe here. My team is on the way, ten minutes out. You need to hurry Hailey.”

Lee hung up the phone before Hailey could ask anything else, her heart rate was through the roof, even before Lee’s cryptic warning. She suddenly felt very paranoid, she was checking all around her vehicle, watching for anything out of place.

About ten minutes later two blacked out SUV’s pulled into the alley and parked next to her. Four federal agents got out, in full tactical gear, with a sniffer dog in toe. Hailey opened her car door and waved them over. She gave them a brief summary of what happened and they re-iterated that she needed to get in and out of his apartment as soon as possible. Whoever was following her would likely come back and try again later. 

Two agents and the dog went ahead to clear Jay’s apartment prior to Hailey and the other two coming up. The all clear was given, with everyone on high alert. It felt weird to have this many people as her security, and in Jay’s apartment. It kind of felt like an invasion of privacy. She was used to this type of environment, she worked in it every day. But this suddenly felt very personal, and she felt extremely vulnerable.

They gave her no more than ten minutes before they needed to move out again. Hailey worked as fast as she could, heading into Will’s room first. She grabbed all the necessities she could see and think of before moving to Jay’s room. She already had her own bag packed for a few days, but she grabbed extra tooth paste and things like that from the bathroom for all of them. She stuffed a bunch of Jay’s clothes into a duffle bag, not really sure where they were heading exactly. So she had no idea what to even pack, a variety of everything made it’s way into the bag. The agents were yelling at her from the kitchen to get moving, another car was on it’s way to pick her up, someone had already gone into her car and grabbed her personal belongings for her, including the insurance slips and anything else in the vehicle with her information on it. Hailey went through the living room and took some movies, Scrabble, phone chargers, a speaker for music, a deck of cards and anything else of importance she could think of. She had no idea what Jay even had here that he couldn’t live without, or when they’d be allowed back, she was hoping she grabbed the important things. Then it dawned on her, the box under his bed. The agents had already grabbed the few bags she had packed and were ushering out the door when she remembered.  
“Wait, I need to go back for one more thing”, she yelled as they looked at one another then at her in protest.

“Make it quick Detective.”

She ran down the hallway back into his apartment and into his bedroom to pull out his box of memories from underneath his bed. If there was anything in this apartment worth something to him it was likely in this box. The pictures he had in here of his mom, she shuddered. She was thankful she remembered this, he might not have forgiven her if something happened to it.

Hailey was shielded as she got into the SUV and driven quickly to Med. She exhaled a deep sigh and closed her eyes,. Just when she thought she might actually be able to relax, things were suddenly taking a huge dramatic turn again.

Back at Med, Agent Lee had made it up to Will’s room and found him and Jay sleeping soundly. She had already alerted Will’s doctor and nurse about what was going on, and told them to keep it to themselves. Lee knew that Hailey, Will and Jay would have to be moved to a safe house until they had this mess sorted out. The less people who knew they were in danger, the better, for everyone. She told them that Natalie and her family would be given round the clock security as well, just as a precaution for now.

Dr. Choi had warned Agent Lee that Jay could be a bit jumpy in his sleep, so he went in first to wake him. Lee put two and two together that Choi and Jay were ex-military, something she had in common with them as well. Luckily, Jay wasn’t violent or explosive when he woke up and Lee could see Dr. Choi trying to quickly explain what was going on. That was her cue to move in. The angry look on Jay’s face could have cut right through her. 

“Jay, I’m sorry. But as you’ve just heard, we have a bit of an issue.”

“A bit? Hailey was followed home today? Is she alright?” He asked furiously.

“Yes, she’s alright. Your partner did an excellent job this morning. Had she not been as alert or aware of her surroundings, things could have gone much differently.”

Jay put his head in his hands, Agent Lee suddenly realized that Hailey meant more to him than just a work colleague.

“Okay, what do we do now.”

“Hailey is on her way here with members of my team. She’s already packed bags for the three of you. We need to move you to a safe house for the time being until this blows over. We think the men who followed her are Ray’s hit men, they are very dangerous. This complicates things, but the best move right now is to be cautious.”  
Jay took a deep breath in and looked over at Will, who was still asleep. “What about Will? Is he well enough to travel?”

Dr. Choi interjected at this, reassuring Jay that Will was well taken care of here and he saw no reason to keep him in past today anyways. “I’ve already packed up a bunch of different medical supplies for you guys, and instructions for Will. He will need his staples taken out in about a week or so, but we can cross that bridge when we come to it.”

Jay sat there for a minute, taking everything in. He nodded and thanked Ethan, who left the room to give Jay and Agent Lee some privacy. 

“How long will this be for? Our work situation is a little sticky at the moment too..”

“Yes I heard about Mayor Kelton on the news. I’m assuming that’s where you were last night?” Agent Lee inquired.

Jay nodded, not able to reveal much, but confirmed that he was in charge as of right now.

“I will notify your Sergeant, and tell them other arrangements need to be made. Not sure how long you’ll need to be away.”

“Sergeant Voight isn’t available either right now, contact Sergeant Trudy Platt instead, please tell her what’s going on, you can trust her.”

“Will do. And Jay, I’m really sorry about this.”

Agent Lee left the room to let Jay break the news to Will. She couldn’t hear what they were saying, but she could tell by Will’s body language that he was upset, understandably. Jay was trying to calm him down and get him semi-dressed and up in bed, ready to move.

Ethan came back in one more time to lend Will a spare change of clothes and to give Jay the medical bag he had packed. The two of them helped a very sore Will get dressed and into a wheelchair and ready to go. They wheeled him quickly out of his room, making one last detour before heading downstairs. Will’s brain was still foggy, but he became more focused when Ethan stopped him in front of another room in the ICU. Natalie was unconscious in bed, her parents, Helen and Owen surrounding her. 

“She’s alive Will, she made it. Internal bleeding, couple broken bones, and a brain injury that we don’t know the severity of just yet, not until she wakes up. But I just wanted you to know that she made it, and she’s a fighter. She’ll be good as new in no time”, Ethan explained, trying to sound as upbeat as possible. In reality, no one really knew what to expect from Natalie once she woke up.

A tear fell down Will’s cheek and he nodded in thanks, staring at Natalie through the glass. Her family didn’t see him, and maybe that was for the best. Jay pushed him down the hall with Agent Lee behind them, grateful he got to see her face at least one last time.

Hailey and the FBI agents protecting her made it to the hospital in record time, only this time they went in through a back service entrance. According to the FBI this was the most secure, and the least exposed to the public eye. They were right about that, Hailey had been at this hospital plenty of times but had never even seen this entrance or area they were currently in. She let out a sigh of relief once she saw Jay and Will coming out towards the vehicle, both safe. Will looked pretty rough still, but he was at least semi-vertical. Jay on the other hand, looked frazzled, and she could only imagine the fit he was going to have once he got in this car. 

The side door opened and Hailey hopped out to help Jay get Will in, a few other agents joined in on getting the car packed up and to review their route for security purposes.

“Hey”, Hailey said to Will and Jay.

“Hey”, Jay sounded and looked relieved to see her.

“You’re alright?” He asked.

“I’m good. This is a lot though”, she said motioning around to the federal involvement and the armoured vehicle they were currently sitting in.

“Ya I know. Agent Lee filled me in. Do you know where we’re heading?”

“I have no clue, they told me we wouldn’t know until we got there, whatever that means. I did manage to get it out of one though that it was Wisconsin area.”

“Here’s hoping for a cabin on the lake”, Jay tried to smile, but was quickly reminded why they were here when Will stood up from the wheelchair and let out a yelp of pain.

Several people including Jay rushed over to him, to which he assured them he was alright, just sore. They got him buckled in and were off to their destination in a flash.

There were three identical SUV’s in formation to the one that Hailey, Will and Jay were travelling in. The plan was to all take different routes, to ensure they weren’t being followed to their final location.

“This feels very Presidential don’t you think”, Hailey tried to make light of a tough situation. That earned a laugh from the vehicle occupants.

Will wasn’t talking much, just answering their questions about how he was feeling every once in a while. Truth be told he just wanted them to stop and go back to bed and pretend this whole thing was a dream. This exact situation already happened to him once this past year, on his wedding day no less. The vehicle, the urgency, the quick good-byes all brought him back to that day. He just wanted this to be over, to be safe in his own city.

“Nat’s alive. She’s not in great shape, but Ethan took me to her before we left”, he whispered.

“That’s great Will, that’s good news. She’s going to be okay, I know it”, Hailey rubbed his arm from the seat behind him. 

Will fell asleep a while later, and Hailey and Jay quietly talked before settling in for naps themselves. They had no idea where they were headed or how long of a drive it would be. All they could see was the Chicago skyline in the background, unsure when they would see it again.


	24. A cabin by the lake

Chapter 24

The drive was long, and both Jay and Hailey had taken turns staying awake to watch over Will, who was pretty out of it most of the way thanks to the pain medication Ethan gave him prior to leaving the hospital. They finally arrived at their destination about 6 hours later, in the early afternoon. They looked out the window of the vehicle, trying to pinpoint exactly where they were, they had lost track on the way up, all they knew was that they were headed North. 

“Pelican Lake, Wisconsin”, Paul, one of the agents filled them in, watching their faces try to orient themselves as they drove through endless woods. 

“Wow, quite the distance”, Jay muttered.

“Guess you get your cabin by the lake after all”, Hailey replied, looking at the cabin as the pulled up to it, rather chalet, before them. This was no old rickety fishing cabin, this was a massive cottage on the waterfront with rod iron gates at the entry.

Even Will perked up a little bit at his new surroundings, he had been quiet most of the drive, nursing a terrible headache.

The agents drove them inside the gates, and into the garage where it was secure. Jay helped unload all of their bags while Hailey took Will inside to get him settled in a room somewhere, she could see he was tired and wanted to lie down.

“I know, almost there buddy”, Hailey whispered as Will groaned in discomfort trying to tackle the few steps leading up into the cottage from the garage. He was a bit wobbly on his feet so Hailey had her arm around his waist, her hand up supporting his back.

They both looked around in awe as they stepped into the cottage, it was beautiful. The view of the lake was even better. Hailey was hoping Will would at least feel well enough at some point during their stay to enjoy it. They went down the hall of the bungalow and found the bedrooms. 

“Here Will you can take the master. You’ll be more comfortable in there.”

“Are you sure? You guys can take it, doesn’t matter to me. I just need to lie down, my head is killing me.”

Hailey chuckled to herself at his you guys can take the master. But he was hurt right now, so she let him have it.   
“Yes Will, I’m sure. Jay and I can take the other rooms, they all have big beds, so you don’t have to worry about him fighting you for the king sized.”

Will attempted a smile but stopped because the side of his face ached. He gingerly sat down on the side of the bed and exhaled deeply, that took a lot of effort. Hailey knelt down to take his shoes off and then helped him lie back down, propped on some pillows.

Will was smirking at her, wondering how she was a badass detective with this tough exterior, yet in private, had all the qualities of a caring nurse, he couldn’t figure her out. 

“You alright for a bit? I’m going to go back out there and figure out what’s really going on now that we’re safe. I’ll get Jay to come check on you in a bit.”

Will nodded, needing to close his eyes, the light was bothering them. Hailey closed the blinds for him and quietly shut the door behind her.

By the time she came back out to the kitchen Jay was being briefed by the agents on what they were allowed to do and what they weren’t. This cottage wasn’t meant to be a prison for them, but it was intended to keep them safe. They were allowed to go outside, but not for long periods of time, or once it was dark. No water activities, no going into town. It was quiet up here, but if they ran into anyone, Jay and Hailey were a married couple from Indiana who rented the cottage from a family friend for a vacation. Will was Jay’s brother and came along, needing some peaceful recovery after an accident at work. They also had to give up their cell phones, which both of them protested, but ultimately understood. Maybe being unplugged for a bit would be refreshing. Other than that they could roam as they liked and could treat this as some time away to relax.

“Like a vacation? You can’t be serious”, Jay retorted. The sass was back.

“Listen, Detectives, I know this isn’t ideal and the three of you have a lot going on right now. But trust me when I say that these men are very dangerous, this is the best option. Marco, the lead hit man, is the prime suspect in a long string of homicides, but we’ve never been able to fully prove it. Agent Lee is going to get things sorted out in Chicago and have you back to normal as soon as possible”, Paul explained. 

The other agent assigned up here with them, Jason, spoke next. “For now, it seems like you guys could use some time to rest. We’ll be in the guest house next door, it’s our security room as well, so you’ll have some privacy in here. We’ll be heading out to the grocery store in about 30 minutes, let us know what you need. Until then, just look after your brother, please let us know if you need anything else.” 

“Thanks”, Hailey and Jay both replied looking at each other in disbelief wondering how they got here.

“Is Will alright?” Jay broke the silence at the kitchen island.  
“Ya, he seems okay, he’s lying down now. Had a bad headache but that’s to be expected. You might want to check on him in a bit, he’ll probably want to change into more comfortable clothes, I figured that’s more your department.”

Jay grinned, “Ya, that’s fair. I’m sorry for dragging you into all of this Hailey.”

“It’s alright. We’ll figure it out, all that matters is that Will is okay, and we’re all safe.”

“I go where you go, remember”, Jay smiled at Hailey who returned the grin.

“I put Will in the master bedroom by the way. The two rooms on the left are for us, doesn’t matter to me which one I take, they’re both the same really.”

“Sounds good, thanks”, Jay went to go get unpacked and take a quick shower. Hailey did a scan of the kitchen cupboards. There were a few staples in there but they would definitely need some fresh food. She started writing a list and added whiskey at the bottom and underlined it a few times. If ever there was a night for her and Jay’s thing, it was tonight.

By the time Jay was out of the shower, Paul and Jason had already come to collect Hailey’s list. She tried to add foods she knew Will and Jay both liked on there, hopefully that was fine, she wasn’t really sure about quantity, they could be here for a few days or a few weeks, it was hard to say. A part of her was a little bit excited for some uninterrupted cooking and baking time, and quality time with Jay in general, even if it was under these circumstances. At least the view was nice.

Jay came out from Will’s room a while later and into the kitchen. “Is there any coffee here?” He suddenly realized he hadn’t had a sip today, that’s probably why he was feeling a dull pain pulsing through his skull.

Hailey had her back to him and when she turned around was holding two mugs in her hand, already one step ahead of him.

“Ugh you always get me”, Jay said playfully as Hailey smiled.

“How’s Will doing?” Hailey asked.

“As good as to be expected. I helped get him into some pyjamas. He’s pretty sore. But I gave him some Tylenol, hopefully that helps a bit. He wants to avoid the painkillers if he can.”

“Gotcha. Those do a number on your stomach anyways.”

“Exactly. Do you think we should try and get him to eat something? It’s probably been at least 24 hours since he’s had anything.” Jay wondered.  
“That’s a good idea. He might not want it, but we could try. Maybe some toast, do you think he’ll go for that?” Hailey replied.

“Worth a shot. I’m just thinking will all the meds and stuff he’s had….might be good to get something in his stomach”, Jay reasoned.

“Good point.” Hailey popped some bread in the toaster and waited for it to go off. In the mean time, she found a hot water bottle in one of the drawers and boiled the kettle to make it for Will. His body in general was sore, and she knew from personal experience that heat usually made things feel a bit better.

Jay smiled at her thoughtfulness and brought the toast and the hot water bottle down the hallway, hoping he could convince his brother into eating something. He stayed in the room for a while, which to Hailey was a good sign. 

He came back out fifteen minutes later with an empty plate, looking pleased with himself. 

“He took it?” Hailey asked.

“Ya he did. Resisted at first, but I think he was actually hungry. Maybe he’ll feel a bit less nauseous now.”

“Hopefully. That’s good. We’ll keep an eye on him I guess, that’s all we can do. Make sure he’s resting”, Hailey said and Jay nodded in agreement. Their first and only focus right now really was Will.

The two of them spent the next part of the afternoon exploring the cottage, and getting themselves used to their new home for the time being. They wandered out to the edge of the dock and sat down on the chairs sipping their coffee, admiring the view of the lake.

“Okay, so now that we’re finally alone….Kelton?” Hailey turned to Jay who was sitting next to her, starting to nod off from the lull of the calm waves against the dock. 

Jay sighed loudly. “Kim, Kevin and I pulled up to his house, crawling with other cops, as you can imagine being a former Superintendent and the current Mayor… He was shot twice, one in the chest and one in the head, he was lying right by the front door. So it’s likely he knew the person, let them into his home willingly, didn’t look like a forced entry. There’s a few working theories, one of which being Voight, another one being Brennan. And to be honest Hailey, maybe Antonio. I really don’t know. Kim and Kev were trying to track Antonio down, that’s the last thing I know since I left to meet you at the hospital.”

“Do you actually think Voight or Antonio would do this? I have a hard time buying that. Regardless of the situation we were in, I can’t see him taking Kelton out like that, in such a public way, knowing full well all eyes are on him and our unit right now.”

“True…but he’s done this before….” Jay trailed off as he watched Hailey’s eyes go wide.

“Not exactly the same scenario, the guy he killed murdered his son. Not condoning it…but you know, it was different. But, ultimately that got Al put in prison and you know how that ended…” Jay trailed off quietly.

“Wow. Okay. I always heard rumours, but wasn’t 100 percent sure.”

“As for Antonio, I doubt it. He would be more likely to turn himself in than murder Kelton. Him killing Kelton wouldn’t help Adam get out of jail or his situation. Antonio’s conscience would get the better of him first. Unless he maybe had a relapse and went off the deep end...” Jay thinking his thoughts out loud for the first time.

Hailey considered that for a minute, suddenly fearing that Antonio’s disappearance and lack of contact with the unit may be more sinister than she originally thought. “So you’re thinking Brennan did this?”

“It makes sense…or she had someone do it for her. Maybe Voight is aware of that too, I really don’t know. Hard to say now that I don’t know how the investigation is going. The last thing he said to me was that he was going to do what needs to be done and the unit would be mine someday….so that leaves a lot of things up in the air. Kelton did have a lot of enemies though so suspect list is wide open. Who knows, word could have got back to Wilson’s guys that Kelton basically set him up to be killed in that drug buy the other day. Kim, Kevin and Platt are all that’s left now, hopefully they can find something to eliminate Voight and Antonio as suspects. As for Adam…today happened so quick. I didn’t have time to check on that situation…”, Jay felt a bit guilty, and looked to Hailey for some reassurance.

“Trudy, Kim and Kev of all people will definitely be all over that. I’m more confident in them finding a way to help Adam than maybe solving the Kelton situation…” Hailey admitted as Jay shrugged his shoulders and nodded in agreement at that.

Before they could talk more, the agents returned with a bunch of groceries and drinks, just in time for dinner. At least they knew what was important. Hailey took off to have a long, hot shower to clear her head and went to lie down for a quick nap. What she thought would be her closing her eyes for a minute turned into a 2 hour long sleep. It was dark by the time she resurfaced, she smelled bacon cooking on the stove. She had to double check the time to make sure it wasn’t morning. She quietly opened Will’s door to check on him, he seemed to be resting fine, before she made her way to the kitchen.

“Hey sleepy. I knew the bacon would get ya”, Jay grinned as he turned away from the stove to greet her.

She laughed and looked around at her surroundings, she was still waking up. Jay had started a fire in the living room, it had cooled down quite a bit, especially since they were just off the water and much further north. Hailey plopped herself down on the couch and curled up under a blanket. Jay came over a few minutes later, Hailey was curious what he cooked for them. He brought over two tumblers of whiskey first then held up a finger that he would be right back. He returned with two plates of breakfast for dinner- bacon, eggs, and chocolate chip pancakes.

Hailey couldn’t contain the grin spreading across her face, she nodded slyly in approval at Jay.

“Did I do alright?” He asked jokingly, he could tell by the look on her face that she was one happy camper right now.

“Now this, is the perfect night. You get me.”

“And who says women are hard to please”, Jay teased.

“Why would anyone eat anything other than breakfast food Jay?

“Because people are idiots Hailey”, Jay smiled, repeating a line from Parks and Recreation. Hailey got a kick out of it. That had been their latest binge together. 

“Ron Swanson is my spirit animal”, Hailey laughed while eating her bacon.

“Love language”, he nodded back at her.

“Love language”, she echoed as they clinked glasses and inhaled their dinner. Whiskey by the fire, breakfast for dinner and each other’s company was all they needed after the week from hell, the perfect cosy night in. No talk about work, no drama, nothing. Just the two of them.

Hailey got up to put their dishes in the sink and put the kettle back on. She tidied up the mess Jay made while cooking dinner, a fair trade off. She came back to sit by the fire with him and handed Jay his own hot water bottle, who looked at her with an eyebrow raised.

“For your shoulder. I heard the way it crunched when you came down on me in the van, and I saw the bruising while you were sleeping in the car this afternoon. You’ve been favouring it all day, hiding it well, but not from me. It looks sore.”

Jay half laughed at Hailey’s detective skills and half grimaced as he went to move into a more comfortable position on the couch, “It is.”

“Here”, she gently pulled him forward so she could slide the hot water bottle behind his back. He relaxed back into the couch and rubbed her hand to thank her.

“And seriously Hailey, thanks for being there for Will, it really means a lot to me that you did what you did”, Jay said as he got a little choked up.   
“Of course. He’s your brother Jay, that means he’s important to me too”, she gave his knee a little squeeze before turning back to watch the movie they had put on. 

They made it through most of the movie before both of them started to doze off on the couch. Jay snapped out of it first, putting the fire out and turning the TV off before going back over to wake Hailey up.

“Hey, time for bed”, he gently rubbed her shoulder.

Her eyes popped open as she sat up reluctantly, she couldn’t wait for her head to hit the pillow.

“I’ll be on Will duty tonight, I owe you one”.

Hailey nodded and grinned before making her way down the hallway and into her bedroom.

“Night Jay”, she said before turning in.

“Night Hails”, Jay passed her room and went into Will’s to do something he hasn’t done in many years. He snuck in the dark room and quietly pulled back the covers and crawled into bed beside his older brother. They used to do this as kids if one of them was scared or not feeling well. Will has done this for Jay countless times post Afghanistan to help him get through the nightmares. But it had been a long time since Jay had done this for Will. Even as adults, this provided a level of comfort that Jay couldn’t explain or put into words. Will was sleeping propped up because of his arm and felt Jay get into bed beside him. He reached over without saying anything and touched Jay’s back to thank him. It was the most familiar thing in the world.


	25. It's Saturday

Chapter 25

Jay didn’t get much sleep, he was tossing and turning most of the night. Mainly just watching to make sure Will was still breathing. Which was ridiculous, he knew that, but still, he was uneasy and felt responsible for Will being hurt. He had a familiar tightness building deep in his chest that he was trying hard to push away. It was around 6 in the morning when he finally heard Hailey get up, listening as her soft footsteps headed towards the kitchen. He slowly got out of bed and crept out of the room to join his partner for a morning coffee.

“Morning”, Jay said, startling Hailey.

“Jay!” She gasped and then laughed a little, “You scared me.”

He flashed her his signature smirk. “Sorry, couldn’t resist. I smelled the coffee.”

“I was expecting you at some point”, she looked over at the time on the stove, “Actually, right on time. 0600 hours, like clockwork Jay.” She grinned.

“What can I say, I’m a man of routine”, Jay took the mug she handed over the island to him and followed her out to the deck. 

Hailey was wearing an over-sized hoodie and some pyjama shorts, although from Jay’s angle it looked like she was wearing the hoodie and nothing else. He laughed to himself.

“What’s so funny chuckles?” 

“It looks like you aren’t wearing any pants”, Jay giggled as he sipped his coffee. Hailey rolled her eyes and made a face, but couldn’t resist laughing at his immaturity either. 

“Didn’t know I was partnered with a 13 year old. See if I invite you out here for morning coffee again Halstead.”

“Mhmm, whatever you say Upton”, Jay continuing to smile to himself.

The two of them enjoyed the rest of their coffee in peace, watching the sun rise higher in the sky, the water looking so clear and refreshing. It was early, but already getting warm.

“You wanna go for a run?” Hailey suddenly asked out of the blue.

“Right now? I thought we weren’t allowed to leave here…”, Jay said cautiously.

“Oh please, when have you ever been not down to bend the rules just a little bit.”  
“Valid point. Sure I guess we could sneak out for a quick one, if you can keep up”, hr grinned as he peered over at her.

That earned another eye roll from Hailey. “Soccer scholarship remember”, Jay chided her. “Plus I’ve seen the way you chase after suspects”, he laughed as she punched his arm.

“Okay let’s go get ready, we need to be back here in like 30 minutes tops”, Hailey said as she went inside to get changed.

They quickly poked their heads into Will’s room to find him still fast asleep, he seemed okay so they left him be for now. Their next mission was to sneak past the guest house where the agents were staying, and hopefully still sleeping in. Jay looked inside of the windows and gave a thumbs up to Hailey, signalling that the coast was clear. They made it past the gates and onto the gravel road.

“It’s actually nice out here”, Jay marvelled at the tranquility of his surroundings.

“Ya it is”, Hailey looked around, they were surrounded by beautiful woods and water as far as the eye could see, and not much else. 

They ran on the road, discreetly checking out houses and their general area along the way. There wasn’t much around, which is likely why the FBI chose to have a safe house up here. Both of them needed to let out some steam, and the run was just what they needed. Especially Jay, he had been feeling a bit anxious, but the endorphins definitely helped with that. Little did he know that’s really the only reason Hailey asked him to run with her, she could tell he was on edge. Who in their right mind wanted to run this early anyways, certainly not Hailey, but she did it for Jay. Even though he was tired, they both were, the fresh air did them some good. Jay’s watch beeped at them at the half way mark and they turned around, pausing for a quick second, let’s race, their eyes told each other. Jay was impressed Hailey kept up most of the way, he knew she hated running, and he suspected that she only did this for his sake. He knew her too well, she wasn’t that good.

“Come on Hailey, almost there”, he said between breaths, noticing her fall behind, pulling back his pace just a little to encourage her to finish along side of him. It was the last push that she needed. Her legs kicked into another gear and she could see the cottage, thank goodness. They finished 3.2 miles, round trip their time coming in at just under 30 minutes. Which by all standards was pretty good considering their circumstances.

“Not bad for those short little legs”, Jay teased as he interlocked his hands behind his head, taking deep breaths to slow his heart rate down.

Hailey looked up at him from a hunched over position, hands on her knees, grinning from ear to ear, “Imagine how fast I’d be if I was 5 inches taller!”  
It was barely 7 in the morning and yet the sun was beating down on them. Both giving each other a look at what they wanted to do next. They successfully snuck their way around the back of the cottage, eyeing the perfectly calm lake.

“You thinking what I’m thinking?” Hailey flashed a devilish grin his way.

“Hailey we shouldn’t”, Jay said looking back at the cottage, expecting the agents to come out and scold them at any moment. 

“You need to lighten up Jay, live a little. Have some fun for once, I know you know how! Until we hear otherwise, I’m treating this like we’re on vacation.” Hailey poked his side.

“I mean, we’ve already broken one rule, why not go for another. They never really explicitly said we couldn’t swim…”, Jay weighed the options out loud. 

“Good enough for me, this is the best time to do this anyways, no one is up yet”, Hailey told him as she made her way down the dock, tearing her clothes off along the way.

“Is this how you behave on all of your vacations?” Jay followed her, trying not to get caught with his mouth open, raising an eyebrow and giving her a cheeky grin.

“Wouldn’t you like to know”, Hailey looked back at him, giving her all too familiar sassy glance.

I would actually, he thought silently as he shook his head and smiled. Jay just took his shirt off, he was already wearing shorts. Hailey on the other hand… he was sure he was blushing. She stripped down to her sports bra and underwear, this was the most carefree he’d ever seen her. 

“My eyes are up here Jay”, she joked.

“Sorry, I, uhh…”, he stammered while trying to play it off and act cool.

Hailey started laughing her head off, she had never seen him like this before. “Jay, I’m only kidding. You cannot tell me this is the first time you’ve seen a girl in her bra and underwear before, it’s no different than a bikini.”

This is the first time I’ve seen you in a bra and underwear, he thought to himself. Not wanting to waste another second of this moment, his inner teenager brain took control and made a run at her on the end of the dock. He grabbed her bare waist and pulled her into the water with him, laughing as they came up for air. Right now they weren’t Detective Upton and Detective Halstead of the CPD, they were just Hailey and Jay. Two adults going for a swim at the cottage. The cold water felt nice against their sweaty skin after their long run. They waded around before making their way to the inflatable island a few feet out from the dock. The both leaned their arms against it, their legs gently treading the water beneath them.   
“I can’t remember the last time I went for a swim”, she commented. 

“Me neither actually, now that you say it. We should do this more often”, Jay replied.

“Swim?” Hailey raised her eyebrow in response.

“No, go on vacation. Cottage weekends. Relax. I haven’t taken vacation days that weren’t forced or medical related in years”, his eyes were far off somewhere, thinking about all the time he’s missed. Hailey studied his face, his freckles prominent in the morning sun.

“You’re right. I’m the same. Life is too short you know?” She replied.

“Yeah, exactly”, Jay said as he splashed her. 

“Well how about this Jay. Once we’re back and everything is sorted out, we’ll plan a weekend away”, Hailey said boldly.

“Yeah?” Jay’s turn to raise an eyebrow. 

“Mhmm. You heard me”, she said defiantly, making eye contact with him before swimming back to the dock. 

He waited behind for a few seconds before following her, his eyes nearly bulging out of his head as he watched her pull herself out of the water by the ladder. She was teasing him at this point. Her lace underwear was very see through, he was glad he was still in the water or else she may have noticed another part of him entirely. He pulled his mind out of the gutter, reminding himself that she was in fact still his partner at work, he was maybe even her superior right now, no one really knew. They had to keep things somewhat professional, while they were here at least. 

He got out of the lake next, and they both quickly wrapped themselves up in towels that had been left on the chairs on the dock. The FBI agents had come out to meet them halfway on their trek back into the cottage, giving disapproving stares to the two of them.

“Uh oh, looks like we’re in trouble”, Hailey laughed.

“Worth it”, Jay winked back. 

They prepared themselves for a lecture, but instead were told that Agent Lee would be calling in a few hours, she would provide an update. Hailey and Jay asked if they would like to join them for dinner, to which they all agreed.

“Making friends with the enemy I see”, Jay smirked.

“We’re all on the same team Jay.”   
Jay felt a bit differently about the FBI, but that was mainly because of this mess with Will, and perhaps some bias related to a former partner of his.

They came back into the cottage, dripping wet, and snuck down the hallway to get changed.

“I’m going to shower”, Jay whispered as he cracked his own bedroom door.

“Me too, you go in and check on Will after, I’ll make us something for breakfast.” Jay nodded and they both snuck away.

After Jay showered he crept back into Will’s room, and laid down next to him again. He should feel awake after the run, swim in the lake and shower, but his body was screaming at him to close his eyes again. He tried with all his might to stay awake, but eventually the darkness overtook him. 

Jay woke up a while later, startled to find Will no longer in the bed next to him. Jay looked around, disoriented but somewhat less tired than he was earlier.

He vaguely remembered coming back in here after his shower, so he must have just been so tired that he didn’t get up again. He heard the toilet flush and the sound of Will brushing his teeth in the bathroom, relieved that he wasn’t in there passed out or anything.

“Morning”, Will said as he slowly walked back over to the bed. He looked a little better today, but it was evident he was still in a decent amount of pain. He had slept with no shirt on and that really highlighted the condition of his left side, it made Jay feel a little queasy staring at him again. The bruising had started to take over his whole body. 

“How long have you…”, Jay started when Will cut him off.

“Hailey’s already been in a few times, probably a good thing since you were out cold”, Will smirked, completely unaware that Jay and Hailey had already been up, went for a run, swim and a shower, all while he was out cold, but that was besides the point.

“Sorry”, Jay said sheepishly as he looked at his watch seeing that it was just past 10 am. 

“No that’s alright, I know you’re tired too. I think we all needed a good sleep.” 

“How are you feeling?” Jay asked.

“I’m okay.” Will sighed, clearly holding back. “Sore, but need to get moving.”

“I know I’m not the doctor here, but I think you need to take it easy still. That’s what Ethan told me. At least for the next few days anyways.”, Jay said sceptically.  
“Ya about that, when do you think we’ll be leaving here? I want to see Natalie…”, Will confessed sadly.

“I have no clue to be honest, it depends how things are going back home. I’m sure we’ll get an update on what’s happening today.”

“Alright”, Will said as he sat down on the bed, making a face as he swung his legs up to lie back down.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Jay looked on at him nervously. 

Before Will had a chance to answer, he heard a soft knock on their door.

“Room service”, Hailey laughed as she entered the room with a tray filled with breakfast goodies.

The coffee cup caught Jay’s attention, but so did something else. Will looked at what Hailey made for breakfast, then at his brother and got a little teary eyed. French toast and berries.

“It’s Saturday”, she smiled slowly.

Jay wished he could have filmed the look on Will’s face, he thought he was going to start crying again, he could see his bottom lip quivering. Will cleared his throat and pulled himself together. “Thank you Hailey, this looks really good.”

Hailey just confirmed everything he thought about her, how like their mom she really is. That maybe in a weird way this was a sign from her when he needed it most. The emotional look on Jay’s face told him he was right, that he thought it too. 

She wasn’t sure what kind of reaction she was going to get out of them but she wasn’t really expecting this, it was making her tear up a bit. 

“Oh my gosh Will please don’t cry, you’re going to make me cry. It’s nothing really. Probably not as good. But figured it might cheer you up a little bit.”

Hailey joined them to eat their breakfast in bed together since Will couldn’t really move around too much. Jay cut up his food for him, much to his amusement, and really ate for the first time in a few days. His stomach thanked him, he almost forgot that he hasn’t really had much to eat since he’s been here. Jay tried to force feed him some eggs last night but he wasn’t really having it. Turns out, the French toast was exactly what he wanted. 

Jay couldn’t take his eyes off Hailey, this version of her was his absolute favourite. Her freshly washed hair was drying in natural waves, she had no make up on and sweats, yet she looked so beautiful. But, what was most endearing to him wasn’t her looks, although he couldn’t complain one bit about those either. It was the way her nostrils flared when she laughed, the way her blue eyes lit up when the sun caught them, the way she smelled of lavender all the time and how she always went out of her way to do the little things. He’s realized as he’s gotten older that the little things, like this one- making French toast for them on a tough day, knowing this was a childhood tradition and comfort that their mom used to do- are often what matter the most. As he was eating his breakfast in bed with his brother and his partner, all that seemed to matter was the little things, even under these strange circumstances. Not that they were in protective custody, that Will was hurt or that they would be going home to a potentially disbanded unit. None of that mattered for right now. How did he get so lucky? Whatever they had between them, he never wanted to let it go.


	26. Rest

Chapter 26

After they finished breakfast, Will said he wanted to try and sit outside for some fresh air. Jay volunteered to clean up the kitchen while Hailey joined Will on the back deck. 

“It’s beautiful out here”, Will said as he sat with Hailey on a recliner on the deck overlooking the lake. 

“Sure is. Is it weird that I’m kind of enjoying this hiatus from the city? Sorry that might be a little insensitive”, she back tracked when she saw Will furrow his brow.

“No, it’s okay. I know what you mean. It’s peaceful out here. It’s a nice escape from real life for a little while”, Will reassured her. 

Hailey smiled. “Are you feeling any better?” She asked as she slowly inspected his head wound.

Will chuckled at her being a worrier just like Jay. “Hailey, I’m a doctor. I would tell you if something was really wrong. I’m not going to lie to you, I’m not feeling great. I’m sore. Like really sore, worse today. But that’s normal. I’m getting there, the human body can handle a lot.”

“Okay, if you say so. But you’ll tell me if you’re feeling off, promise? Jay is really worried about you too, he just doesn’t use his words as much.”

“I know he is,” Will gave her a half smile, “I can’t thank you guys enough for all that you’ve done these last few days. Jay slept in my room, it’s been…years since he’s done that”, he said as he shook his head in disbelief. 

Hailey smiled and nodded, “He cares. More than you know.”

Will could say the same about Jay with her, but he had a feeling she already knew that. Jay seemed to confide in Hailey much more than anyone else, it was a reassuring sign. He wanted Jay to be happy, move on from past heartbreaks, plan for the future and have a wife and kids one day. Will knew all it would take is the right girl to make him realize that there was more to life than work.

Will shut his eyes to rest and soak up some Vitamin D, Hailey did the same. They went back inside after about an hour or so to find Jay passed out on the couch in front of the TV. 

“Do you think something’s wrong? It’s not like him to sleep like this…” Will asked quietly.

Hailey shook her head, “It’s been a crazy week at work, and this- she motioned to Will and around the cottage they were staying in- he’s exhausted. I don’t know about last night but he’s probably in the single digits, low doubles at best for sleep the last few nights before that anyways.”

Will seemed to buy that answer, although he was still not used to seeing Jay be this out of it. He doesn’t usually handle times of stress or anything else by sleeping soundly…usually quite the opposite. He quickly stopped himself though he didn’t want to jinx it. 

Hailey went over to Jay sleeping soundly on the couch to cover him up with a blanket. Will was about to instinctively yell out to her to not get too close, he’s seen and been on the receiving end of what Jay does in his sleep, if someone startles him by touching him unexpectedly. But instead, Hailey sat down beside him, covered him up with a blanket and gently rubbed his back a few times before getting up and walking away like it was the most normal thing ever. That surprised Will, he’s not sure he would have believed it if he didn’t see it with his own eyes. Jay didn’t even flinch, as if he was expecting Hailey. 

“He’s not warm is he?” Will asked, still taking on the doctor role even though he was the one who was supposed to be the patient.

Hailey kind of laughed, “And you think I’m the worrier here. He’s fine Will really, he’s not sick, just tired. You’re supposed to be the one that’s resting remember”, she reminded him sternly. 

Will finally caved and excused himself and went back to his room to lie down. He didn’t want to admit to Hailey that he wasn’t feeling so hot, but she could probably already see that, she was very perceptive. If she noticed, she didn’t say anything. She brought him in a glass of water and made sure he was comfortable before heading back to her room.

“I’ll just be next door if you need me alright?” Hailey said before leaving.

“Sounds good, need to lie down for a bit, feeling a little dizzy”, Will admitted. 

“Ya of course, get some rest”, she appreciated the fact that Will was at least honest when he wasn’t feeling well, more than she could say for Jay, who she normally had to pry it out of. 

Hailey did suspect the stress of the week was definitely catching up to Jay, she could tell this morning. But, she wasn’t going to be the one to ask, he was a grumpy person if he truly wasn’t feeling 100 percent.

She was craving a bit more sleep herself so she retreated to her room and closed the blinds to turn the world off for a while longer.

Hailey woke up to the sound of Will throwing up next door a couple of hours later. She rushed in to find him hovering over the toilet, Jay by his side, holding him in a semi-upright seated position.

“What happened?” She asked to neither of them in particular, surprised at how quickly Will had gone down hill since she last saw him a few hours ago. 

“He’s running a bit of a fever, what do you think we should do?” Jay whispered.

Hailey’s hand reached down to meet Will’s back and could feeling the warmth radiating off of him. Her thoughts immediately went to the cut on his head being infected. She started to do a mental check of all the things that could be wrong. 

“Ethan said that’s normal right? His body is responding to the trauma. A low grade fever is a sign he’s fighting something off. We just have to make sure it doesn’t get too high, and keep an eye on him to see if he starts exhibiting any other symptoms of an infection”, Hailey said calmly after evaluating the situation.

“Will you’re the doctor here, you tell us. Is this normal? Or should we be taking you to a hospital?” Jay asked in a panic, still half asleep himself.

Will responded a bit, by way of nodding and pointing to Hailey. His way of telling her that she was right, he just couldn’t get the words out right now. The two of them seemed to notice him do that.

“Okay, I’m going to go grab that bag Ethan gave us and see if he wrote anything else of importance down”, Jay said as he got up from the bathroom floor. Hailey took his place and gently felt Will’s forehead. Not burning up, but definitely on the warm side.

“Oh, Will”, she muttered quietly, as she placed a hand on his back, comforting him as he continued to vomit. 

The staples were still secure, but every time Will heaved Hailey saw the skin around his scalp look as if it was going to burst open again, it made her nervous. 

“Over did it a bit today I think”, he finally resurfaced and looked over at her. 

“Ya maybe a little bit. What can we do for you?” She asked sympathetically.

“I can’t really tell if this is the concussion or a migraine to be honest. I feel terrible.”

“Well, hard to say, the symptoms are kind of the same for both. Do you think your staples are infected? Let me see”, Hailey asked nervously as she slowly tilted his head towards her.

“I don’t think so. They’re a bit red, but that could have been from sitting in the sun. Ginger problems”, Will smirked. “I feel fine that way, it’s just my head that’s killing me.” 

“Okay. You’re right they are a bit red and warm, no pus though. Once Jay gets back with that bag I’ll clean them out just to be sure.”

“And then Dr. Upton?” Will gave her a cheeky grin.

“And then… I’ll give you some Tylenol to see if that brings your fever down, and keep an eye and see if the redness spreads or any other symptoms appear?” She half-stated, half-asked him.

“Good girl. Maybe I’ll poach you from Jay one day after all”, they both chuckled.

Jay rushed back in, looking a bit nauseous himself. His head clearly wasn’t on straight today for whatever reason, so she volunteered to do the dirty work. She quickly cleaned up and got Will sitting on the closed toilet seat. She checked his temperature, an even 100 degrees, nothing to be totally alarmed about just yet. But they definitely needed to keep an eye on him. Ethan sent some antibiotics, but said not to start them unless absolutely necessary. Hailey was banking on Will being right and this was just him over-doing it. She gently cleaned around the staples with some cool water, getting a few groans out of Will.

“I know, sorry, there- all done.” She patted his head dry with a clean towel.

“Thanks.”

Hailey helped Will stand up and offered him an arm to lean on as he walked gingerly back to his bed, grateful for the extra support, even though they were extremely height mismatched.

“How do you know how to do all of this by the way? You seem to know what to do and say more than the average bystander.” Will questioned once he was tucked back in to bed, curious to hear her answer.

“First Aid 101 Will, I am a police officer you know, I do have some basic training. Plus, I pay attention in class and when the paramedics come,” Hailey laughed.

Will returned the smile, “I know that. I meant more along the lines of… I don’t know everything else. The way I’ve seen you look after people- Jay, myself, - it seems a little bit more natural to you than most.” 

“I don’t know”, she shrugged her shoulders. “I have two older brothers, growing up both of them were athletes. They got hurt a lot. My parents owned a restaurant, and they were there 24/7, basically we had to fend for ourselves. So, if one or both of them were home sick or hurt themselves or something, it was usually me looking after them. Being the youngest and only girl. I just kind of learned what to do to help and make sure they were okay…no one else was.” Hailey half grinned, oddly opening up to Will about her childhood. It was a rare slip up that surprised even her. 

That made a lot of sense to Will, she had both tomboy and nurturing qualities. He wondered if Jay had met her brothers. Hailey had this look on her face, one of reminiscing, he wasn’t sure if that was a good or bad memory that he brought up. He could relate, things weren’t always easy in their house growing up either. She forced a smile, Will sensing he might have hit a sore spot so he didn’t push further.

“And no, before you ask, Jay has not met my family yet”, Hailey smirked at him out of the corner of her eye, especially when she saw the surprised look on his face. She was good. Mind reader.

“Yet”, Will picked on the one word she added in there at the end. She shook her head and flashed her dimples at him.

Jay came back with an ice pack, a hot water bottle and a glass of water. 

“Wasn’t sure so I brought all of it”, the three of them laughed. Hailey put the hot water bottle behind his back to ease his sore muscles, and Will balanced the ice pack on the top of his head to dull the pain he was feeling. 

“Are you okay in here now? I think I’ve met my Halstead barf quota this week, for potentially my lifetime really”, Hailey joked once she knew Will was in a bit better spirits.

“I’m good, you kids go have fun out there. I need some quiet, and darkness.”

They left silently, hoping that would be the last of any episodes for the day.   
Jay returned to his spot on the couch in front of the TV and Hailey followed him, Will was not the only Halstead she was keeping a close eye on. 

“What’s on your mind Jay?”

He closed his eyes and took a deep inhale and long exhale, shaking his head. He could feel his anxiety bubbling up to the surface, the flood gates threatening to open.

“I still can’t believe this is happening. Will could have been killed the other night, and Natalie. You- yesterday morning. Us earlier this week…I….”, he trailed off and rested his face in his hands.

Hailey rubbed his back and let him continue, he needed to get all of this off his chest. She knew this was hard for him, and he had been going around the last few days with the weight of the world on his shoulders. He needed someone to share the burden with, the only person he knew how to really open up to.

“Adam is in jail Hailey, prison. For who knows how long. He’s not safe in there. Antonio has run off somewhere, Voight… I don’t even want to say out loud what he may or may not be involved in….We are in the middle of nowhere Wisconsin. Look around! WISCONSIN. WITH THE FBI. ” His expression was animated and his hands were out in front of him at this point.

Hailey had to keep her lips pursed to avoid laughing, he was really going off. She was also upset about the events of this past week, but right now all she wanted to do was laugh about it weirdly enough, so that’s what she did, she couldn’t hold it in any longer.

Jay raised his head and gave her the strangest look when he realized she was laughing uncontrollably, not crying. Crying would have made more sense. Hailey didn’t really know why she was laughing, what happened wasn’t funny at all. But sometimes emotions present themselves in strange ways.

“What could you possibly be laughing about?” Jay questioned.

“We’re with the FBI, stowed away in a mansion on the waterfront, like some sort of movie. We had to sneak out this morning as if we were teenagers, and we’re a married couple from Indiana!”, she barely got all of that out through her tears from laughing so hard.

Jay was confused at first, but then caught the giggles too. When other people laugh so hard, sometimes it’s contagious. Eventually the two of them were in stitches on the couch together and Jay realized it was what he needed. No more moping around or feeling sorry for themselves. This week had been heavy, and emotional, and scary, no doubt about that. But sometimes a good laugh is all you needed to feel better.

She wiped the tears streaming down her face and got up to start making something for the two of them for lunch. 

“I can make my own lunch you know, or make lunch for you too”, Jay said from the couch, not wanting Hailey to think she had to look after everyone all the time.

“I know you can”, she smirked, “But I’m better at it.”

Jay rolled his eyes and laughed, she was probably right. She made a quick sandwich for each of them and brought over a plate of veggies and hummus to snack on. They sat quietly, enjoying the sun shining through the big bay windows. 

“What do you want to do this afternoon?” Jay asked after he finished his lunch.  
“Bake”, she said without a second thought. 

Jay studied her face, that was clearly something that made her happy and that she probably wanted to do for herself, to unwind.

“That sounds nice. I’ll probably just watch TV alone..” Jay trailed off batting his eyes at her, hoping Hailey would get the hint and ask him to join her.

She took the bait. Rather, knew what Jay was up to. He looked like a little lost puppy, wanting a friend for the afternoon.

“You’re welcome to join me, baking is always fun with a partner”, she grinned. 

Jay jumped off the couch, eager to help.

“I’ve been dying to use that stand mixer on the counter over there.” Hailey’s eyes lit up, it was her turn to look like a little kid in a candy store. 

Her heart eyes at the kitchen set up was interrupted by Jay’s laughter.

“Who knew, Hailey Upton, secret housewife”, he giggled as she punched him in the arm.

“Watch it or else I won’t let you lick the spoon”, she laughed as he followed her to bake off some stress.

Hailey had way more fun baking with Jay than she thought she would. Jay was the last person on earth she would expect to be good at this, but she had to admit, he wasn’t too bad. 

“Since when do you like baking?” Hailey questioned Jay.

“I don’t really. But if it’s something you love, there must be something worth loving about it”, he replied. Hailey grinned, not expecting that kind of response from him. It was sweet. 

“The apron suits you Jay”, Hailey laughed, returning his earlier housewife comments.

“I make everything look good”, he retorted, and twirled around showing off his apron that was covered in flour.

“Ya, ya.” She rolled her eyes and began cleaning up, following through with her earlier promise and passing Jay one of the cookie dough spoons, his grin spreading from cheek to cheek. He finished the cookie dough leftovers and helped Hailey with the dishes.

Several trays of oatmeal chocolate chip cookies and banana bread later, Jay and Hailey found themselves ready for a snack. They sat at the island with a plate of warm cookies  
and milk and dug in. Hailey was reaching for a cookie when she saw Jay’s hand come up gently towards her face. She was confused at first, if this was him trying to make a move, it was odd timing. He laughed when he saw her hesitation.

“You have some flour on your face still”, he said quietly as he brushed it away from her cheek and nose with his thumb. His hand lingered for a second or so too long, they both knew that, cupping her cheek. He felt her blush and their eyes that were once staring into one another, fell to the floor. He was about to say something to Hailey, when they were interrupted by Jason and Paul knocking at the front door and entering the cottage. Jay quickly pulled his hand away from Hailey’s face, giving her a silent- “We’ll finish this later”, kind of look. The two of them got up from the barstools they were sitting on and greeted the agents at the door.

“Afternoon Detectives, looks like we popped in at just the right time”, Paul said as his eyes discovered the fresh plate of cookies in the kitchen.

Hailey laughed and invited them to join them at the island for a treat.

“Agent Lee will be giving us a Skype call in a few minutes”, Jason said, setting his laptop on the counter and getting it ready for their impromptu meeting.

“Any updates on the Marco situation? Or from back home in general?” Jay asked, fishing.

“We are nearly as out of the loop as you guys are, so we’ll wait and see. Hard to say at this point, it’s early. Where’s your brother? Will he be joining us?” Paul replied.

Hailey looked to Jay silently and shook her head.

“Will isn’t feeling very well today, it’s probably best if we just do this without him. He’s a little shaken still”, Jay filled the agents in.

“Gotcha. At least the two of you have an idea of how these things work.”

Hailey and Jay both nodded and perked up once Jason’s laptop started ringing. 

Agent Lee appeared on the screen a few seconds after the connection was made, greeting everyone, but quickly getting down to business.

“Hey everyone. So, good news and bad news”, Agent Lee stated, Hailey and Jay shared a side eye glance at one another.

“Good news is that we picked up Marco’s accomplice Colin, we’re working on flipping him right now, but he’s been tough. Nothing solid on Marco as of yet.”

“Bad news…?” Jay asked.

“Bad news is that…Marco is in the wind. We don’t know where he is, he’s laying low. He’s smart, he’s been through this process before. And…”

The “and” made Hailey and Jay a little more on edge.

“Detective Upton, I hope you weren’t too attached to your car, Marco torched it yesterday morning”, Agent Lee just came out with it. 

Hailey felt the hair on her arms rise up, so they really were in danger in Chicago, and she cut it close yesterday avoiding that Mercedes. It was an unsettling thought. 

“Well, it was a department vehicle, you may have to take that one up with my desk Sergeant”, Hailey smirked at Jay, thinking about what sort of meltdown Platt must be having about all of this.

“Oh we’ve had words already”, Agent Lee grinned. “That woman is a force.”

They both nodded into the camera. “Anything on Dr. Manning?” Jay asked, hoping for good news.

“Unfortunately not much, all I know is that she is still at Med, under tight security with her family. And as far as I know, still unconscious.” 

“Okay, thanks. Any idea on how long we’re staying here?” Hailey replied.

“Not sure, but expect a while longer. Like maybe at least a week.”

Hailey caught a glimpse of Jay, who shared a small smile with her, maybe being here a little longer together wasn’t so bad.

“How’s Will doing?” Lee asked.

“He’s okay…not great. But okay. I think we should keep the car torching and Marco in the wind thing to ourselves for now… I don’t want to freak him out more than he already is”, Jay said.

Everyone nodded in agreement until they were interrupted by a small voice behind them. Will appeared in the kitchen, looking pale and nervous.

“Keep what from me?”


	27. A very sick Will

Chapter 27

Will stood in the kitchen, trying to remain calm after what he thought he just overheard.

“Nothing Will, everything’s alright. Are you okay?” Jay asked, trying to change the subject.

“No Jay, I want to know what’s going on. I have a right to know”, Will stated. 

Hailey and Jay looked at each other, Jason and Paul were left staring awkwardly at one another, not sure that they wanted to get involved in this.

“Will, you don’t need to worry, really. It’s fine. Everything is fine”, Jay reiterated. 

“Did I just hear you say that Hailey’s car was TORCHED?! That to me seems like the definition of not fine Jay!” Will started to raise his voice, frustrated at the lack of communication with his brother.

“Jay, Hailey, Will- I’m going to sign off here and give you guys some privacy. Sounds like you need to talk about a few things. I’ll be in touch”, Agent Lee jumped in, Jason and Paul quickly excused themselves back to their bunkie. They all agreed that dinner would be better sometime in the next few days, once Will was feeling up to it.

As soon as the three of them were alone in the kitchen, Hailey gave Jay a nod as he let out a deep exhale. 

“Alright fine. Yes, Marco torched Hailey’s car. He is currently MIA. But the FBI has his accomplice in custody, they’re working on it. Nat is still at Med, she hasn’t woken up yet, but they’re hopeful.”

What little colour that was left in Will’s face drained. Marco was on the run, he might know where we are, the irrational voice inside his head told him.

“Hailey, I, I- I’m so sorry you got dragged into this. Your car…?” Will stammered.

“It’s okay Will, not the first time a department issued vehicle has been torched, probably won’t be the last”, Hailey smirked and brushed the seriousness of the situation off, trying to take some of the tension between Will and Jay away.

That comment didn’t go over as well as she had hoped. Will looked at her blankly.  
“How are the two of you so calm right now? Hailey’s car was SET ON FIRE. OUTSIDE OF YOUR APARTMENT JAY. BY A HITMAN.” Will was growing increasingly upset, which was making his already aching body feel much worse.

“Will, it’s just a car, it can be replaced. All that matters is that no one was inside of it. This comes with the territory of our job unfortunately. If it’s not Marco, it’s something else. That wasn’t even the closest brush with death we had this week”, Hailey was regretting her words as soon as they spilled out of her mouth judging by the scared look across Will’s face.

Jay was giving her a death glare for bringing up the shooting to Will, he was clearly frazzled enough. Will’s face was confused, and his eyes went wide at that admission. He was looking at the two of them for answers.

“Okay Hailey, if he really wants to know…You might as well tell him the truth, since you started”, Jay said a bit annoyed.

“Earlier this week Jay and I got shot at in a surveillance van by some punk with an automatic assault rifle…while we were trying to take down the former Mayor of Chicago... ripped right through the side of the van. But here we are! Part of the job. I’m sure you’ve been in scary situations at the hospital”, she tried reasoning with him.

Will again, stared at her blankly. “You mean to tell me, the two of you could have died the other day and you’re just choosing to tell me now? Is that why your shoulder is bruised Jay? Hit you in the vest, playing cowboy again?” 

Hailey saw Jay glaring at her out of the corner of her eye, but she continued. 

“You had a lot going on, we all did. It wasn’t that bad honestly…Jay’s shoulder is fine. We weren’t hit.” She felt Jay’s eyes on her as she tried to backtrack her statement. 

“Wasn’t that bad? Hailey you’ve had multiple death scares this week and you’re trying to tell me to calm down?” Will shook his head at the both of them.

“Will, relax. All she’s trying to say is that this is our life. This is part of our job, whether we like it or not. We have to accept it. This happens more than you know, I just don’t tell you because I don’t want to scare you.” Jay jumped in.

“I don’t need to be protected Jay, I’m your older brother.”

“Ya who makes stupid, selfish decisions”, Jay muttered under his breath, irritated with how Will was handling this, and speaking to Hailey.

“What was that?” Will could feel his blood pressure rising, causing his head to throb.  
“None of this would have happened if you would have just listened to me back in the fall. But no you had to go off and “do the right thing”. Look how that turned out”, now Jay was getting angry.

“Jay, enough”, Hailey said sharply, now was not the time for the blame game.

“Here we go. Of course Jay, you’re always right. You’re perfect I forgot.” Will could feel a fight coming. 

“Whatever man, for lack of better words I’ve always had to be the bad cop and you know it. At least I’m not selfish.”

“There it is. Is this about mom and dad? You know how stubborn dad was, we were both bad cops in different ways to him. And as for mom, I’ve already said sorry a million times, I can’t take it back. I would if I could you know that. Bringing it up every chance you get to hold it over me isn’t going to bring her back Jay.” Will continued yelling.

That took all the air out of the room. Jay was on the verge of exploding, his eyes piercing Will. Hailey was left standing awkwardly in the middle of the two of them. 

That stung Jay and he knew it, Will felt remorse the second the words left his lips, but it was too late now. 

Jay just shook his head at his brother and stormed off, leaving out the back to go sit on the dock before he said something he would regret. Hailey looked at Jay storming off and a clearly in pain Will, torn at what she should do, still in disbelief how that just escalated. 

Will went to follow him but was stopped by the throbbing in his head. He closed his eyes, grabbed hold of the island and pressed the bridge of his nose, trying to dull the pain. 

“Whoa, easy Will”, Hailey rushed over to his side, grabbing his good arm and placing a hand on his back to steady him, temporarily forgetting that he was still only a few days out from a serious accident.

“Just breathe, deep breaths”, Hailey whispered. It took a second but Will calmed down and was able to open his eyes to face Hailey.

“Sorry you had to see that”, Will said quietly. 

“I don’t think it’s me that needs the apology Will”, Hailey replied. 

“I know. I didn’t mean for it to come out like that. I don’t know how else I can prove that I’m sorry, he’s still holding a grudge. I’m just…frustrated. He’s frustrating to communicate with sometimes.” Will sighed.

“Trust me, I know”, Hailey gave a small smile. “Let’s get you back to bed though, you don’t look very well.” Hailey said concerned by his pale and clammy appearance.

Will kept looking outside, trying to decide if he wanted to go talk to his brother to make amends. 

“I know you’re scared Will. But even though we are also in protective custody, Jay and I are still police officers. Jason and Paul are FBI. We aren’t going to let anything happen to you okay? I promise.”

Will nodded at her, but was still hesitant to leave Jay out there on the dock. Hailey knew what he was thinking and assured him he was fine. 

“Just let him cool off Will. We’re here for the near future, there will be plenty of time to work it out. I’ll go talk to him.”

Will gave in and headed back to his room, his body not feeling the best.

Hailey helped him get settled again, and sat with him until he calmed down and dozed off. She went back out to the kitchen and saw Jay sitting down by the dock, the sun was starting to set over the lake. She brought them out some whiskey, hoping to soften the anger he was feeling with their thing. 

“Jay?” She could see him staring off in the distance, it was in her best interest not to surprise him at this point. 

He snapped out of it and met her eyes, she could see the sadness in them. She sat down on his armrest and silently gave him a hug. He resisted a bit at first, but then she felt him relax and start to breathe heavily as she rubbed his back, “Shhh. Shhh it’s okay.”

“How dare he. He wasn’t here Hailey. Our mom was dying, kept asking for her oldest son and I had to tell her he wasn’t coming. Me, I’m always the bad guy. It was like that with our dad too, Will could do no wrong”, he continued with tears in his eyes.

“You’re right. That isn’t fair. And I’m sorry that you had to do that, I can’t imagine how difficult that must have been.”

He grabbed her hand in an effort to try and keep his emotions at bay. She held it back, stroking the top of his hand with her thumb until he was able to speak again.

“Will and I used to be so close when we were kids. Life kind of got in the way of that as adults. I know I’m not the best at communicating with him, but it’s hard for me to move past things when he’s such an ass sometimes. He’s totally oblivious as to how much that actually hurt me. I just feel like he has no idea what I went through then, and now. Even if I told him I don’t think it would change things. He’s in his own little world, always has been.”  
“I know. But being honest with him might help. He is sorry, I told him he owed you an apology. But he also doesn’t know how you feel because you haven’t told him, that might be part of the problem. He might be more understanding that you think. I don’t know Will very well, but it’s obvious to me how much he cares about you. You guys are all that each other has now. Family is important Jay. He’s your only brother. Harbouring this guilt and pain isn’t good for you, or for him. You have to let it go, or find a way to work through it.”

He sighed, knowing she was right. He nodded and would talk to Will once things had settled down. Hailey and Jay watched the sunset from the end of the dock with a glass of whiskey in their hands, soaking in the summer sky. 

“I think this is my new favourite thing spot”, Hailey grinned. 

Jay couldn’t help but smile at that. 

“You’re not wrong. This view is incredible”, he replied, looking at the sky, but also at his partner.

After the sun set, Hailey made a move to go back into the cottage to start on some dinner, Jay followed closely behind. He turned on some music and helped Hailey get the food going. Chicken, potatoes and vegetables on the grill for them, leftovers thrown into a soup for Will later. Jay finished with the BBQ and they sat together enjoying a late night quiet meal. Jay cleaned up while Hailey put the finishing touches on the chicken noodle soup. 

“Might turn in early”, Jay said suddenly seeing the time, 9:30.

“Yeah? You alright?” Hailey asked.

“I’m good. Bit of a headache”, he replied motioning to the half finished bottle of whiskey on the counter.

Hailey smirked, “Gotcha. I can bring some soup in later?” 

“I’m alright, thanks though. Just make sure Will has something”, Jay said genuinely.

“I’ll keep an eye on him tonight, he didn’t look so great earlier”, Hailey replied.

Jay nodded and disappeared down the hall, calling it a night. Hailey brought a bowl of soup to Will not long after, sitting quietly with him while he forced it down.

“How are you Will?” Hailey asked as she felt his forehead, a bit warmer than earlier.

He shrugged his shoulders, “I’ve been better.” As close to admitting defeat as he would allow.  
“You still have a fever”, Hailey pointed out the obvious to the doctor.

Will managed a smile, “I’ll be okay. Going to try and sleep it off.”

“Alright. Well, I’ll be back to check on you in a bit”, Hailey took his dishes to go back out to watch some TV. 

“Thanks Hailey, soup was good.”

Hailey smiled, but had to tell him one last thing before he fell back asleep.

“And by the way Will, Jay’s bruises weren’t from bullets hitting him. It wasn’t that close. It wasn’t reckless what he did, he isn’t living his life day to day anymore. He stuck his neck out for me, laid his body down literally for me. There’s a difference. It was to protect me, I might not be here otherwise. That’s who Jay is. He has a weird way of showing it, but he would do anything for you, me, people he cares about. Just something for you to consider.” 

Will looked surprised as she finished, that wasn’t an angle he had immediately considered, but now that Hailey told him the truth, it made all the sense in the world. Of course Jay would throw himself over top of Hailey. How could he not have seen that earlier. He gave her a half smile and a silent apologetic nod, and started to close his eyes again. 

She smiled back and left his room, turning off the lights and shutting the door, hoping he could get some rest and start to turn the corner.

Hailey enjoyed the next few hours of peace and quiet to herself. The last few days, week really, had been a lot. She hadn’t really had time to let everything digest and mull things over.

She poured herself another glass of whiskey and sat by the fire Jay started earlier, the crackling was mystifying. She decided to call it a night just before midnight, poking her head back into Will’s room once more.

What she found alarmed her. Will appeared to be asleep, or close to it at least. But he was shivering violently, beads of sweat running down his forehead, grimacing in apparent pain. He had turned a corner alright, but clearly in the wrong direction. 

“Shit”, she muttered to herself, kicking herself for not checking on him sooner. She ran to the bathroom and grabbed the thermometer and a damp cloth.

Checking his temperature woke Will up, clearly confused. 

“Hailey?” He asked half asleep.  
“Hey. Sorry to wake you. Your fever is 102 now Will. I think you might have an infection…”

He nodded slowly, looking around the room, in a daze.

“Should I give you the antibiotics?” Hailey asked nervously.

“Not yet. Try to break the fever first.” Will instructed.

Hailey wasn’t sure about that, but decided to take Will’s word for it. Clearly he was more qualified than her in this area.

“Okay, but if it keeps getting higher, you’re taking them.”

“Deal”, Will said as he accepted more Tylenol and the cool face cloth Hailey set on his forehead.

Hailey sat with him in bed while he alternated between hot flashes and shivering for the next little while. He was clearly feeling miserable with no signs of improvement, so she made an executive decision and forced him to take the medicine Ethan sent. 

She heard the door creep open slowly about an hour later and was surprised to see Jay standing there. 

“What’s going on in here, it’s almost 2 in the morning, I heard you guys up talking still?”

“Will isn’t doing very well Jay. Trying to keep him comfortable.”

Jay looked concerned for his brother, and went over to his bedside, feeling his forehead.

“He’s really burning up Hails”, they both shared a worried glance with each other.

“I know, I gave him the antibiotics not too long ago. Just to be safe, the staples were looking a little questionable…really red and warm…and his fever wasn’t letting up. So ya, just a waiting game now.”

“How high was his fever?” Jay asked.

“103.5 at it’s worst… It was down for a while but then it spiked again. He feels terrible”, Hailey said as she watched Will’s eyes flutter, attempting to get some rest.

“103.5? That’s pretty high, should we be worried? We’re in the middle of nowhere Hailey. What if he needs a hospital…”, Jay suddenly felt nervous. 

She put her hands up, in a don’t shoot the messenger type of way.   
“Just keeping an eye on him for now, hopefully the antibiotics bring his fever down so he can get some actual rest. That’s what he said to do, that’s our only option at this point really…Can you grab a glass of water, and dampen this again?” She handed him the cold compress resting on Will’s forehead.

“Sure”, Jay agreed and went into the bathroom for a minute. 

He came back out and handed the cloth to Hailey, who dabbed it against Will’s flushed cheeks and forehead. He moaned in his sleep, scrunching his face up. “I know, I know”, she said calmly as she settled him back down.

“How’s your headache?” Hailey asked quietly.

“It’s okay. I had some of your soup just now, it was good.”

“Good”, Hailey grinned as she watched Jay awkwardly hovering over the bed. 

“He’s alright Jay. He’s not feeling well right now but this will pass. The medicine will kick in soon. You can go back to bed if you want I’m okay. I’ll stay with him tonight.”

“Is it alright if I stay with you?” Jay asked sheepishly.

Hailey was surprised by his request, but instantly grinned and pulled back the covers.

“Warmed the spot up for you”, she said as she slid over closer to the middle of the bed, softly patting the space she made for him next to her.

Jay rolled his eyes and smirked, but was secretly glad he wasn’t spending the night alone, he wanted to be close to Hailey. He wasn’t in the best mood and the pains in his chest all pointed to an impending panic attack.

Hailey could see the relief on Jay’s face when she said he could stay. She wasn’t sure why, but he just seemed like he needed some company tonight. To be close to someone.

He turned on his side towards her, closing his eyes as she pulled the blanket up over his shoulders. She thought he was finally asleep a few minutes later until she felt him slowly inch closer towards her under the blankets, away from Will’s watchful eye. Hailey’s hands were a little preoccupied caring for Will, but she knew what Jay was doing. He was as close to her as humanly possible without actually touching her, nearby in case he needed to reach out for her during the night. Hailey moved her foot ever so slightly so that it was resting against Jay’s thighs. She looked down and saw him smile with his eyes still closed. 

“Thank you”, he whispered and gently grabbed a hold of her foot, grateful that she was there to ground him. She responded by placing a hand behind his head, rubbing small circles in his hair with her thumb until he was almost passed out.   
“Get some sleep, I’m right here okay.” He nodded and drifted off soon after.

That left Hailey awake in the middle of the two sleeping brothers, keeping a close eye on Will. He didn’t seem to realize Jay was even in the room, he was in and out, clearly a bit delirious. An hour or so passed by with Will still uncomfortable, although the antibiotics did appear to be working. The thermometer still read 101.5, not a huge improvement, but an improvement nonetheless. Hailey felt good enough about that for now and decided to close her eyes, she couldn’t keep them open for much longer. She wiggled down and curled up next to Jay, who was still out like a light.

Will woke up briefly a few hours later, staring at the lump in bed beside Hailey and smiled softly. He was expecting her to be in here still, but did not expect to see Jay. Hailey lay motionless while Will attempted to grab the glass of water from his nightstand, knocking the lamp ever so slightly. The sudden movement and noise quickly woke up his ranger brother who was snoring moments before.

“What’s wrong? Are you alright?” Jay asked quietly, with a hint of worry in his voice that surprised Will. 

“Ya, I’m good. Just need some water”, Will replied hoarsely.

Jay slid out from under the covers and went over to Will’s side of the bed to help him. 

Will was trying to do it on his own, but felt a little shaky, which Jay picked up on. He took the glass from Will’s hand and helped him take a few sips. 

“I got it Will.” There was still tension between the two, but Jay knew he needed to put that aside for now and look after his brother who was clearly not in great shape.

“How’s your head? Should I check your temperature?” Jay asked sceptically as he felt Will’s forehead.

Will nodded yes, and let Jay help him. “Head hurts still.”

“100. That’s down quite a bit from earlier. That’s good right?” 

“Ya that’s good. I’m feeling a lot better actually, just sore”, Will responded and looked down awkwardly to avoid Jay’s eyes. There was a moment of silence between the two until Will spoke first.

“Jay I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have taken a jab like that at you. It’s just, it’s just hard sometimes for me too. I have to carry that guilt with me for the rest of my life”, Will said teary eyed.

“I know. There was just so much that you missed. With mom, and dad…and me…he trailed off. It’s hard to forget that sometimes. It felt like you abandoned me, like you didn’t care. I needed you Will”, his voice broke as he was trying to keep quiet to avoid waking Hailey up. 

On cue, Will looked over to his side to see Hailey still sleeping, giving Jay a do you really want to have this talk now look.

“She sleeps like a rock, trust me she can’t hear us”, Jay finished his internal thought.

“Jay, you are my baby brother, all that I have left. I know I should have been there for you. I didn’t know you were struggling as much as you were. If I did, I would have been home in a second you know that. But I was dealing with things in my own way, I’m not proud of who I was back then. But I hope we can make up for lost time now. I got upset earlier because if anything happened to you…I don’t know what I would do.”

Jay smiled softly, trying to fight back the tears. It was what he always wanted to hear from Will. He stayed away from Chicago for so long not because he didn’t love Jay, but because he was hurting in his own way and needed to figure it out for himself.

“I feel the same way. But this is my job Will, my life. You have to trust me. I’ve been kidnapped, beaten within an inch of my life, shot, responsible for killing innocent people, here and in Afghanistan. I have to carry that forever too. This week, when we got shot at, what Hailey failed to mention was that my bruises were from shielding her. Not from being a reckless cowboy- your words not mine. I threw myself on top of her and covered us with a vest. It was scary, and to be honest, a very close call. But you know what Will, I would do it again. And I would choose to be uprooted and put in protective custody in the middle of nowhere Wisconsin if that meant keeping you safe. I will make that choice every single time, for the people that I love”, Jay looked over to Hailey sleeping in the bed as he said that, watching how peaceful she looked.

Will raised his eyebrows at Jay, shocked at how casually he just admitted that. 

“What? Oh don’t give me that. As if you didn’t know”, Jay smirked sarcastically.

Will laughed for the first time in a while, breaking the rest of the tension between the brothers. “I knew it.”

“One more thing before we wrap this sappy conversation up”… Jay braced himself for another hard part. If he was really going to get over the bitterness and grudge he was holding against Will, he needed to take some of his own medicine and be more honest. Taking Hailey’s advice to heart and working on their communication, a big part of that was on him and he knew that.

“Ten years ago, I was in a helicopter crash in Afghanistan. That’s why I was medically discharged. Mouse and I were the only ones who survived. It was really bad… and I’m still trying to deal with the aftermath…” Jay trailed off, trying to control himself.  
“I know”, Will said quietly. Jay looked up at him confused, wondering why he wasn’t freaking out, so Will filled in the gaps.

“You told me a long time ago when you were blackout drunk one night. You got really upset. The next morning you clearly didn’t remember anything, and I didn’t want to bring it up again. And I’ve seen your scars.”

“Why didn’t you say…?” Jay stared at him with such vulnerability in his eyes.

“We were just getting back on good terms. I was hoping that one day you would tell me for real. And then days turned into weeks, months, years…and I knew this big secret of yours that you had no idea I knew about. I didn’t really know how to handle that so I kept my distance on the matter. Aside from the nightmares, I really had no clue how you were coping. I feel guilty now, knowing how much this has affected you and I’m so sorry. I know you have Hailey, but Jay if there’s anything you need....”, Will was cut short by a surprise bear hug from Jay. 

Jay didn’t say anything, he didn’t have to. All this time, he was afraid what Will might think of him. Freak out and say he made a mistake by enlisting just like his dad did, that he had it coming by going over there. See him as less than, a loose cannon, or damaged goods. But he knew the whole time and still loved him. Will wrapped his good arm around Jay’s back and held him there in silence for a few minutes. So rare, for Jay to be this affectionate. He was soaking it in. 

“Everything’s going to be okay Jay”, Will said quietly. 

“I’m glad you’re alright, you know that. You scared me, Hailey too”, Jay finally admitted. 

“I know. But things are going to be fine. Poor Hailey, what I looked like when she first saw me. She cleaned all the blood off of my face, I was so distraught”, Will said shaking his head looking at her sleeping next to them.

Jay smiled, Hailey never told him that part. Probably to protect him from the messy side of this spontaneous vacation they were currently on.

“I talked to Hailey tonight. I unloaded and she told me everything that I told her I needed to tell you. So here I am. I’m trying to be better at the whole feelings thing…it might just take some time.”

“I get it. We’ll figure it out. Hailey is a keeper Jay. Now go back to bed it’s 4:30 in the morning”, Will grinned.

After Will fell asleep, Jay went back over to his side of the bed that he was sharing with Hailey, who he sort of forgot was still there, she was so quiet it was almost funny.  
He pulled back the covers and laid down next to Hailey, who reached out for his hand as soon as the blankets were back over them. She didn’t open her eyes, but he could see a cheeky I told you so smile forming across her lips. Jay shook his head in disbelief, she was good. Too good. She overheard all of that.

“How long have you been awake? You’re a weasel, you know that”, he laughed quietly in her ear. 

“Long enough. I’m proud of you”, she mouthed. 

In a bold move, he put his arm around her waist and pulled her closer to him. Her eyes opened to find his an inch from hers, but she didn’t pull away. She melted closer into his chest, similar to how they were lying in that surveillance van this week, but this time on their own terms. They found their comfortable sleeping positions against one another, not that it took long. Jay’s arm was across her body, Hailey’s hand resting comfortably against his shoulder and chest. Their foreheads met in the middle, nearly touching. 

“Is he okay?” Hailey mumbled quietly, referring to Will, who she could hear breathing heavily behind her.

Jay smiled, her concern for Will was endearing, even when she was half asleep. “He’s feeling better. His fever is way down. Go back to sleep okay, get some rest”, Jay whispered as he gently rubbed her back.

He bit his lip softly and felt his heart rate jump. It was dark in the room, he could barely make out her face. But he knew. He knew she felt it too, even in this weird moment with his brother in bed next to them. Jay put his hand on Hailey’s cheek, his fingertips brushing her hair from her face. He planted a soft kiss on her forehead, pausing for a moment, to remember the electricity between them forever.

Hailey squeezed his hand before nodding off, unable to wipe the smile off her face, one that he couldn’t see. Jay felt her body go limp, signalling that she was actually asleep this time. He followed suit shortly after, holding his world in his arms.


	28. Rainy Day

Chapter 28

Will woke up groggy the next morning, finding Hailey and Jay still fast asleep beside him. The way they were intertwined in each other’s arms….this was the one time he wished he had a phone so he could take a picture of this. It looked like they hadn’t moved an inch all night. They both looked peaceful. He could see Hailey’s back calming rising and falling, Jay’s hand following the same pattern because his arm was still wrapped around her. Will checked the time, it was still early, only 8:30 and he wasn’t sure he was ready to get up just yet. Judging by the sound of the rain falling against the windows, he had a feeling the three of them wouldn’t be moving much from this spot today. So, he followed their lead and closed his eyes, nodding off again within a few minutes.

A few hours later, Hailey started to come around to the sound of muffled voices. It took her a second, and she forgot where she was before feeling Jay’s body next to her. She opened her eyes abruptly when she realized it wasn’t his face she was touching, but rather the top part of his thighs. He had obviously moved up to a seated position while she still asleep. He chuckled when he saw her cheeks flush with embarrassment.

“If you wanted to cop a feel you know you could have just asked”, Jay said playfully, Will laughed from behind her too. Hailey rolled her eyes and grinned foolishly.

“Hey Hailey, ever wake up in bed with two guys before?” Will interjected, trying to lighten the mood.

“Not since college”, she replied quickly, earning an outburst of laughter from Will and Jay, herself included. Will gave her a fist bump in response to her joke.

“Alright, alright. You got me. Now do one of you want to fill me in on what happened last night?” Will asked, trying to string together his night, it was a little foggy.

“Well, I came in here to check on you before bed and you were burning up. So I sat with you for a bit to see if your fever would come down, but you were in bad shape so I gave you the antibiotics. I’m sorry, I know you were trying to avoid taking anything, but you got really sick. I didn’t know what else to do.” 

“Don’t apologize Hailey, you did the right thing. Thank you for taking care of me last night. I’m feeling a lot better now.” Will grinned and reached over to squeeze her shoulder in thanks.

“Which speak of the devil, you’re probably ready for another round of antibiotics. You should eat something first though”, Hailey replied.

“I’m already on it”, Jay replied. She heard the sound of the toaster popping a few seconds later. 

“Well, well look at you. Thanks Jay.” Will said as Jay hopped out of bed to head to the kitchen. He came back a few minutes later with some toast and juice for Will so that he could take his medicine. Hailey looked at him, they had obviously smoothed things over for now, she was glad. Jay glanced over and winked at her, holding a finger up to silently say he would be right back.

Jay came back to the bedroom with a mug of piping hot fresh coffee and a bowl full of yogurt, granola and fresh berries. 

“French press, just how you like it. And a little honey on top of your yogurt. Also a Hailey trademark.” Jay presented her with breakfast, looking pleased with himself.

Hailey raised her eyebrows, looking quite impressed. “Wow, Jay. If I would have known I would get this sort of service for sleeping with you…and your brother…I would have jumped the gun a long time ago.”

Will snorted and nearly inhaled his juice he was laughing so hard. Jay had a smirk on his face too.

Jay shook his head and climbed back into bed with the two of them.

“But for real, thanks Jay. I’m starving. And also needed coffee like an hour ago.”

“I know. You’ve been doing so much here, it’s your turn to relax. And be waited on.” He gave her a side smile as they sipped their coffee in bed together. Hailey’s stomach was happy with the yogurt and berries, it was exactly what she wanted, Jay was good.

“Your headache’s better?” She asked him.

He nodded yes. “Coffee helped.”

“Hey, you two are supposed to be taking care of me you know”, Will interjected sassily, earning a laugh from Hailey and Jay.

“You’re right, we’re sorry Will. Are you okay, for real?” Hailey asked. She felt his forehead, his fever had finally broken.

“No I’m just kidding. I’m good really. I think I’m going to listen to my body today and just stay put. Let’s just not move from this spot for a while alright.”

“Can’t argue with that”, Jay agreed as he took Hailey’s empty dishes and set them on the night table. She let out a yawn and slid back down to rest her eyes. Will joined her.

“Wake me up when it’s time for lunch okay”, she giggled with her eyes closed.

“Deal”, Jay said as he took his turn covering her with the blankets and rubbed her back until she fell back asleep.

Will stood by his statement earlier and spent most of his day in bed. That left Jay and Hailey to spend some quality time together. 

The rest of the day was spent relaxing, watching TV, playing Scrabble by the fire. A big storm was passing through, so going outside was out of the question.

“I’m glad Will is finally on the mend”, Hailey said relieved, the last few days were a bit stressful.

“Me too. I don’t know what I would have done if you weren’t here with us. Thanks for taking such good care of him”, Jay said gratefully.

“He would have done the same for us”, she smiled.

“You’re going to be a good mom one day Hails”, Jay blurted out.

“Ya who knew our practice run was going to be Will.”

A glimmer of surprise sparkled in Jay’s eyes, catching Hailey’s slip up. Her cheeks flushed instantly as she realized what she just said. Our practice run for kids. If Jay caught it, which she was sure he did judging by the smug grin spread across his face, he thankfully didn’t call her on it. 

“We’ll thank him for this some day”, he replied tellingly. She flashed her dimples his way, understanding the implied undertone of his reply. Then, they returned to their Scrabble game like nothing ever happened.

Will made an appearance later in the evening. He was looking a lot better, more like himself. He was still taking it easy, Jay and Hailey forcing him to lie down on the couch, propped up by pillows. The swelling in his face was finally down, revealing a nasty black eye.

“Nice shiner you have going there”, Hailey commented.

“Ya you should see the other guy”, he grinned.

After staying up to talk for a while, they all turned in early, separate beds this time. Much to Jay and Hailey’s disliking. Even though it was great Will was feeling better, they both secretly wished they had an excuse to snuggle again tonight. 

Jay lingered in Hailey’s door way, her smile telling him the same. 

“Night Hails”, Jay tapped the door frame and headed down to his room.   
Silence, that was what he was the most afraid of usually. But tonight, he felt more rested, confident in his ability to sleep well. So, he did.

Everyone made it through the night with no issues, Will was slowly healing, everyone needed a recovery day it seemed.

They passed the time over the next few days doing much of the same. Movies, Scrabble, cards, other board games, cooking. Just about anything to kill time. They had a nice stretch of hot weather again, so drinks on the dock were becoming a favourite too. Jay and Hailey had become obsessed with Can-Jam, Will occasionally stepped in with one hand. Regardless of the situation they were in, the three of them could definitely agree that this was the most ‘vacation’ and relaxation time they had in years. Time outdoors was always good for the soul. 

Much like the weather in Chicago, Wisconsin had it’s own quirks. It was hot all week during the day, but the nights cooled off. Cool enough to sit by the fire in their sweats and roast marshmallows and drink whiskey, pop for Will since he was still on antibiotics.

“Wanna play chubby bunny?” Hailey asked with a twinkle in her eye.

Jay and Will both looked at her, perplexed. “What’s chubby bunny?” Jay asked her.

Hailey’s eyes went wide. “You’ve never played chubby bunny?! What kind of upbringing did you two have”, she joked. 

“We lived a very boring childhood as city kids apparently”, Will laughed.

Hailey grinned. “Alright, so basically you start by putting a marshmallow in your mouth, one at a time, and you have to say chubby bunny after each one. You keep adding marshmallow’s until you can’t say it anymore, whoever has the most marshmallow’s in their mouth wins, simple.”

“This sounds like a choking hazard”, Will chided, his inner doctor showing through.

“Oh come on Will, live a little,” Jay started stuffing his cheeks with marshmallows. He got to 11 before he couldn’t say it anymore, tears streaming down their faces from laughing so hard, even Will. 

In the end, Hailey won, no surprise, she was after all a seasoned vet. Their stomachs hurt from laughing until they cried, a much needed release from their week. Will called it an early night, Jay and Hailey staying up a little longer by the fire, the embers stoking, emitting a nice glow and warmth.

“When you told me, I’m going where you go last week…Did you think we would end up here Jay?” Hailey asked quietly, breaking the silence and lull of the campfire.  
“Not exactly what I had in mind…but I’m pretty glad we’re here. I’d follow you anywhere Hails, even Wisconsin. You know that.” 

She grinned as she rested her feet on the edge of Jay’s chair across from her, lightly grazing his thigh. He set his hands on top of her feet to keep them warm. Staring out at each other, trying desperately to make these moments last.

Jay didn’t want to admit it, but he had grown accustom to sleeping with Hailey during their stay here. What started out as the first few nights staying together strictly to watch over a very sick Will, turned into a comfortable arrangement. One they both craved, Jay especially. But, as the week went on, they retreated to their own rooms at the end of the day, neither wanting to say out loud that this was for the best. That they were getting too comfortable playing house together. It would only complicate things further. A little over a week had passed since they arrived and things were as normal as they could be. Will was back on his feet, minus his casted wrist. But overall, a functioning human being again. Jay was in Will’s room having a morning coffee with him while Hailey was showering when Will blurted out the obvious.

“You didn’t sleep at all last night did you?” Will noticed the dark circles under his eyes.

Jay’s first instinct was to brush it off and tell Will he was fine. But, he reminded himself that he was going to try and be more open and honest with his brother.

“Not really man. I’m tired”, Jay replied with a yawn.

“This is supposed to be a catch up week, have these last few days have been hard for you?”

As much as Jay was trying to be honest, Will was trying to be more understanding about his situation.

“I’ve been okay. We were so focused on making sure you were alright the first few days that I didn’t really have time to think about my usual things. Being in a new environment and stressful situations can sometimes be…triggering…but I’ve been handling it.”

Will smiled, happy that Jay was at least confiding in him. “What do you usually do to handle it?”

Jay laughed, how would he begin to explain the thing to Will. “Usually talk it out with my partner over a drink”, he grinned cheekily.

“Just talk?” Will tested the waters. “You seemed to be well rested when Hailey was in here with us.”

Jay knew what he was implying, Will has seen them sleeping together before.  
“I do my best sleeping with Hailey”, Jay admitted, but also grinned seeing the confused look on Will’s face. “Get your mind out of the gutter, it isn’t like that. I meant that normally when I sleep, I never feel very…rested. But whenever I sleep with Hailey, regardless of the circumstance, I always feel so much better. The last few nights have been hard without her.”

“You ever think of telling her that?” Will asked smugly.

“No. But she knows”, Jay returned the smirk. 

Will was satisfied enough with that answer out of Jay, he didn’t say a lot, but what he did spoke volumes. They finished their coffee and went to join Hailey out back for a game of Can-Jam. Jay put sunglasses on to hide his tired eyes from Hailey. Will was good at reading him, but nothing compared to Hailey. She would sniff that out in a second, and probably force him into taking a nap with her. Which he wouldn’t be opposed to, but he didn’t want her to feel like she had to do this for him. Not right now anyways.

It was just before lunch and they were deep into a game of Can-Jam with Jason and Paul, Will was keeping score. Hailey and Jay were a few points away from winning when a thunderous clap from the sky made them all jump. Lightning was striking closer and closer on the lake and a few droplets of rain started.

“Whoa”, Will said. They were too focused on the game to notice the huge storm that had been brewing across the water. 

“Let’s get inside, rematch later you two!” Paul said as he and Jason ran towards their bunkie, the rain was starting to come down in huge droplets.

“Deal, see you later!” Jay, Hailey and Will grabbed the speaker playing music off the ledge of the deck and ran inside, just in the knick of time before the skies opened up.

“I love when it rains like this”, Hailey said.

“Me too. Nice to fall asleep to”, he said as he yawned.

“Why don’t you go back to bed Jay, you’re exhausted.”

He shook his head, but gave up, she was on to him. “I don’t know why I’m so tired.”

“You’re run down, it’s been a crazy few weeks.”

Will eyed them, maybe Hailey did notice that Jay was off today. Who was he kidding, of course she did. She knows him better than anyone.

“Might take a nap on the couch”, Jay settled for a middle compromise.  
“Movie time Will?” Hailey asked, reaching out in hope that Will understood Jay needed company.

“That sounds good to me.” Hailey went to the kitchen to make some popcorn. The three of them inhaling snacks and sipping tea to the sound of rain falling against the big bay windows. The Sandlot was on TV, a classic. Hailey looked over at Jay to see his eyelids drooping and his head lulling back and forth just as Ham was yelling, You’re killing me smalls! He was fighting to stay awake and Hailey knew why, but didn’t say anything. Will shared a look with her, the two of them continued to watch the movie as Jay eventually drifted off, lying flat on his back.

“Finally”, Will whispered. Hailey turned towards him and smiled. The two of them finished the movie and turned the TV off for a while, Will was still recovering from the concussion. Too much screen time wasn’t good. They talked while Jay slept and Will grabbed them more snacks. By the time he sat back down he noticed Jay starting to twitch in his sleep. The sudden movements put Hailey on high alert, she set her tea down, anticipating a reaction out of Jay at any moment now.

Sure enough, a few seconds later, the tell tale whimpering started, and the painful faces and the mumbling. Will was frozen in his place.

“Hailey you need to move out of his way”, Will warned sternly, afraid for her safety.

She made sure she was fully in between Jay and Will, the last thing she wanted was for Jay to somehow hit an already injured Will, who was finally feeling better. He would never forgive himself.

“Hailey…”, Will warned again, worried that things were going to escalate. Jay pinned him down once during a flashback with both hands on his throat. He couldn’t exactly help much if things were going to go that way if Hailey tried to touch him.

“It’s okay Will, he’s just scared.”

The way Hailey answered took Will by surprise. He knew she’s seen him like this before, but it was always after the fact, never how she handled calming him down during a full blown episode. He knew Hailey could handle herself, but Jay could be very unpredictable and strong when he was like this. Will was sometimes scared of Jay when he was like this, but Hailey didn’t seem put off at all. It was the opposite really, she saw this as Jay being frightened, not frightening. It made him think, and reconsider how he had treated this all these years, maybe he was looking at it all wrong. Jay needed support, not space. He was just scared. 

“Jay”, she softly called a few times as she took one of his hands in hers and gently laid down closer to him on the couch.

“I wouldn’t do that…”, Will said as he saw Hailey reach out to touch Jay’s face.  
Instead of what Will expected, Jay actually turned towards Hailey when she did this. He was still fast asleep, but seemed to reach out to find her. 

“There, you’re okay. You’re not alone, I’m here”, Hailey whispered as she pulled him in closer to her, rubbing his back in the process. Jay turned further on his side and rested his head on her chest.

Will let out a breath he didn’t realize he was still holding in once he knew for sure Jay wasn’t going to blow up. He watched as his brother put his arm over Hailey’s body protectively, and stretch out against her, becoming seemingly calm and content again. The whimpering stopped and his breathing evened out. Looked as though Hailey had the magic touch. Jay never slept this good, or looked this well rested. Maybe he was right after all, that he did his best sleeping with Hailey. 

Hailey relaxed as she felt Jay’s body settle down on top of hers, his heart rate returning to a regular pace. His body was turned towards Will, who saw the tension in Jay’s face melt away.

She turned and nodded to Will and put her finger up to her lips to tell him to stay quiet. 

Hailey pulled a blanket over both her and Jay and moved her focus back to Will. She was absentmindedly rubbing the back of Jay’s head and neck as he fell further and further into a deep sleep, one he so desperately needed. Hailey could see Will staring at her out of the corner of her eye. 

“What?” She mouthed, challenging him, her lips curled up in a slight smirk.

Will looked at both of them, fascinated, and he instantly got it. The two of them loved each other, deeply, it was obvious. Jay wasn’t even awake and all he wanted and needed was Hailey. They looked so natural together. He teased Jay and questioned what was going on between them, but it looked like it was way further along than what he even expected. If Hailey could see what she just did and still accept Jay for Jay, that pretty much sealed the deal in Will’s mind. Of course when Jay was with Erin, she knew there were cracks too. But never like this, not to Will’s knowledge anyways. It was obvious that Jay and Hailey’s bond went beyond any sort of physical connection they may or may not have already acted on. He trusted her with the most fragile inner workings of his soul, and she trusted him, with no questions asked. He stood by his thoughts that his brother was more comfortable with Hailey than with anyone else on Earth.

“He’s stressed”, Will pointed out. 

Hailey turned and gave a nod acknowledging that. “Crazy few weeks.”

Will nodded in agreement as Hailey hugged Jay a little closer.

Will handed her the TV remote a while later, and she raised an eyebrow. “I thought you were supposed to avoid screen time.”

“Meh, a bit longer at this point won’t hurt. It’s more for your entertainment. You might be here for a while”, he said referring to an out cold Jay sprawled across her. 

“Alright but promise me you’ll tell me if your head starts hurting.”

“Scout’s honour”, Will saluted her.

Hailey laughed and flipped on the HGTV channel.

“Really?” Will smirked, not taking Hailey as one for the home improvement type.

“I love Chip and Joanna Gaines, sue me”, Hailey chuckled.

Will smiled and continued to watch Jay’s chest rise and fall, snuggled under the blanket and into Hailey. He turned his head back to the TV, he suddenly felt like he was invading on a very private moment. 

They stayed like that for the rest of the afternoon, Jay still dead to the world, Will was in and out. Hailey even closed her eyes temporarily too. The weather was sleep inducing, and it felt nice to actually just have a quiet afternoon for once. 

Jay woke up a little while later to the sound of Will and Hailey’s voices. Something about loving it or listing it, both providing their conflicting opinions. He opened his eyes and found himself staring right at Will. It took him a second to realize he was under a blanket lying on top of Hailey, his arms wrapped around her. He looked up at her, and she smiled softly back, her warm hand still resting on his back. He already knew what happened.

Will gave Hailey a nod and she looked down to find Jay waking up. 

“Hey sleepy”, she smiled, not sure how Jay was going to feel about Will seeing this.

Jay pulled himself up to a semi-sitting position to match Hailey and Will, blinking his eyes, trying to get his bearings.

“Feeling better?” Hailey asked quietly, her hand still on his back. 

He nodded and half smiled at both of them, “I am, thanks.” He squeezed her leg, checked his watch and got up to grab a glass of water and start on dinner, it was the least he could do.

Jay was almost finished with the spaghetti and meatballs he was preparing when they heard a knock at the door. Paul opened the front door and handed them a package.  
“Agent Lee sent this over, you guys deserve a fun day tomorrow. Talk later”, Paul waved and stepped back out. Will, Jay and Hailey looked at one another confused. 

“Well, open it I guess”, Hailey said. Jay grabbed a knife and sliced open the package. They became even more confused when they saw what was inside. Three bathing suits.

A note from Agent Lee was sitting on top. 

Jay, Hailey, Will… Since you’ve been in hiding for longer than expected, we thought it might be nice to have a day on the boat. Hopefully these fit, I’ll be in touch tomorrow night. – Ingrid

Will let out a fist pump, Jay and Hailey smiled at one another. 

“Finally some fun! I haven’t been on a boat in years”, Will said.

“Yeah should be a good time, I saw a wakeboard out there”, Hailey added.

“You know how to wakeboard?” Jay asked with an eyebrow raised.

“Yeah of course”, Hailey said nonchalantly.

Jay and Will laughed, of course she did. Hailey Upton, still a mystery. They devoured their dinner, had a few night caps and went off to bed. 

As Hailey was brushing her teeth, she heard a soft knock at her door. Jay came in quietly and sat on her bed.

“Are you alright? Do you want to stay in here tonight?” She asked him.

Jay looked at her blankly and shook his head. “Um, no. No it’s not that. Hailey, there was an extra note in the bottom of the box, tucked into the bathing suit sent for me.”

“Okay…”, Hailey replied slowly.

“From Agent Lee.” He took the note out and unfolded it, reading off the contents to Hailey.

“Jay, please share this with Hailey. I don’t want Will finding out just yet. We still haven’t been able to find Marco. His cell phone last pinged off a tower near St. Louis. I hate to ask this, but if we can’t find him in the next day or so we may need to take other unconventional measures. Usually our people in protective custody aren’t elite Detectives, so this is a huge advantage. I want the two of you to talk this over, and decide if you’re okay with releasing your location. It may be our best chance at catching him. I’ll call tomorrow night with more details.”  
Hailey stared wide eyed at Jay as he read off the note. He let out a breath, knowing what she was thinking. It was too good to be true, their stay here. Their break from reality. Reality just came crashing back down on them.

“So tomorrow might be our last “normal” day here”, Hailey stated.

“Looks like it, so that’s why they’re letting us have a fun day”, Jay replied.

“What do you think the odds are of them catching him by tomorrow?” Hailey asked naively. 

Jay smiled, both of them already knowing the answer to that question. “I would say not high. Are you okay with this? It will be me, you, Paul and Jason here. There’s an arsenal of weapons in that bunkie. We will have plenty of time to get ahead of this and be ready for him. Will though… I’m not sure he’s going to be okay with this. But like Agent Lee said, it might be our best shot.”

Hailey let out a deep breath. “Agreed. I’m good if you’re good. We’re in this together right. We might as well finish it off that way too”, she replied.

Jay nodded at her, knowing what they just agreed to was dangerous, probably a little reckless. But, as long as he was on the run, Marco was a huge threat to all of them, their loved ones back home too. If this was their best shot, they were going to take it.

“Let’s keep this between us for now okay. Will needs a good day tomorrow. We all do. So let’s go about things as normal, and let Agent Lee break the news tomorrow night.”

“Deal. It’s settled then. We’ll lure Marco out of hiding. Here.” Hailey stated.

Saying it out loud made the hair stand up on Hailey’s arms. She would be lying if she said she wasn’t hesitant about this idea, but now was the time for action, not over-thinking. This was her and Jay’s job, Paul and Jason too. They were more than prepared.

Jay gulped and nodded in Hailey’s direction. He looked back at her from the end of her bed. She silently pulled the covers back, an open invitation for him to crawl in. Knowing what they know now, he was going to need to be at his best in the next few days. That meant sleep was important. Hailey smiled at him as he got up to turn the lights out, gently sliding in next to her and grabbing her hand. They had no idea what was about to happen next.


	29. One last normal day

Chapter 29

Hailey stayed awake half the night thinking about what was about to happen to them here, their quiet piece of solitude. What happens to this cottage after the cover is blown? At what point in the day is Agent Lee going to break the news to Will? What happens if something goes wrong? If Marco brings more people than they have good guys here? What’s going to happen to them all after? Will they have to testify in court against a known mafia hit man? That could jeopardize her and Jay’s undercover identities for the rest of their careers. Her mind was racing and she couldn’t seem to turn it off. Which was silly, she reminded herself, an accomplished, confident Detective. They were more than capable of pulling this off, hell they’ve pulled off crazier things before. But having Will here made her nervous, more so for his safety, he’s already been through enough. Jason and Paul were solid, there was no concern there. And Jay, of course, no questions. But the “what if’s” were really messing with her insomnia tonight.

It’s as if Jay knew she was stressed out and woke up a few minutes later. The lights were off in the bedroom but he could tell that Hailey was awake next to him, restless.

“Hey”, he said quietly as he rolled over to face her. 

“Hey”, she replied back, confirming his suspicions that she was still up.

“Talk to me Hails”, he whispered as he grabbed her hand this time. Both of them had their eyes closed still. They didn’t need to be looking at each other to know what they were feeling or thinking.

“What if this is the wrong decision? We can’t risk putting Will back in harm’s way”, she replied after contemplating if she wanted to tell him how she really felt or not.

“Hailey you’ve never been one to second guess yourself. I know you’re scared. I am too, if I’m being honest. And I don’t know if this is the best way to do this, but it’s the only way that’s for sure going to give the FBI what they want. Which is either going to be Marco in custody or Marco with a bullet through his brain, you know that”, Jay tried to reason with her. He didn’t need to see her to know what was going on in her head, he could sense the anxiety, he had some of his own.

“You’re right. I’m just nervous about how Will is going to react to all of this. He’s just starting to feel better…”, Hailey trailed off.

Jay laughed as Hailey rolled on her side to stare back at him now. “What’s so funny?”

“You. You and Will, you care. I think it’s cute. Your budding little friendship, a soft spot for him.” He couldn’t see her, but this is likely the point where she was rolling her eyes at him. 

“Oh enough”, she replied back with a chuckle.  
Her and Will have never really spent much time together, outside of anything Jay related. So this time away had been nice, she was enjoying getting to know him better. Will and Jay were alike in many ways, but in the ways that they were different, they were very different. She missed her brothers, and part of her felt them with her when she was with Will and Jay.

“As long as we can agree that I’m still your favourite Halstead”, Jay said sassily.

“You’re in my bed aren’t you?” Hailey laughed as he poked her side.

“I’ll take that as a win. Now. It’s time for bed Hailey. I don’t even want to look at the time or ask if you’ve been awake this whole night or what. But, I’m going to close my eyes now, I suggest you do the same”, Jay yawned as he drifted off again, throwing his arm around Hailey’s back.

She smiled softly and gently rubbed his arm that was protecting her and keeping her nerves at bay. 

“Night Jay”, “Night Hails.”

Jay was up first the next morning. He let Hailey sleep in a while longer, she was tossing and turning most of the night. It was around 7:30 that she woke up to the smell of coffee sitting next to her on the bedside table.

Jay was sitting up drinking his coffee and reading a book. He looked down and noticed her eyes were open and grinned.

“Knew the coffee would force you awake. I’ve been so bored without you.” 

“Not all of us wake up at 6 am naturally Jay”, she said as she laughed and sat up in bed to join him for their now morning ritual.

“You sleep okay?” His turn to fish.

She considered lying to him, but she figured he already knew the answer from sleeping next to her all night. “Not the best, but it will do. Going to need this caffeine to get my day going. Sorry if I kept you up”, she said sheepishly, scared to look in the mirror at her hair this morning.

He turned his head toward her and raised his eyebrows, smirking. “I think I’ve kept you up enough nights too. It’s okay, it happens”, he reassured that she was okay for feeling nervous.

They heard a soft knock at the door and saw Will poke his head in before saying anything else. They both burst out laughing when they saw him, already in his bathing suit.  
“You can’t be serious Will, it’s 7:30 in the morning and you’re ready for our boat day already. We haven’t even been out of bed yet”, Jay was laughing so hard.

“I’m excited Jay, let me have this! When do you think we’ll go out?” Will asked with a grin on his face, looking like a kid in a candy shop. He wasn’t even batting an eye at the fact that Hailey and Jay were in bed drinking coffee together.

“I would imagine not for a few more hours”, Hailey laughed too. “Eager beaver you are Will.”

“I wish I could try wakeboarding too”, he said looking down disappointed at his cast.

“I’d be willing to bet Jay is going to face plant enough for the two of you today, we’ll tape your cast so you can swim at least”, Hailey replied, after getting some sarcastic side eye from Jay.

“Aaand I just realized that you guys were probably in the middle of something…sorry”, Will finally clued in to his surroundings, Hailey’s silk pyjama outfit…her messy hair, Jay shirtless reading a book. Hailey and Jay smirked at his sudden embarrassment. They knew nothing of that nature happened, but Will didn’t, so they let his imagination run wild.

“It’s alright Will, we’re just having coffee”, Hailey replied with an “or are we” look in her eyes.

“I will leave you guys to that”, Will awkwardly walked out, winking at Jay in the process though.

Jay rolled his eyes and laughed, “Well that went better than I expected anyways.”

“He probably thinks we hooked up”, Hailey giggled and looked over, just realizing Jay was wearing boxers and nothing else.

“You know what is really sexy though? Snoring”, Jay barely got that out before Hailey smacked him with a pillow.

“Enjoy these last moments Jay Halstead, soak them all in. There will be no snuggling later tonight”, Hailey feigned hurt. Eventually giving in to Jay’s puppy dog eyes and pout at her, and him apologizing profusely. That her snore is the best snore he’s ever heard.

“You’re only saying that for more back rubs”, she laughed at his expression. He was caught.

“So what if I am. That’s not a bad thing. We have to go back home soon, let’s enjoy today”, he said, getting more serious.  
She looked over at him and smiled, returning the same feelings. The moment was over as soon as it started, both realizing the precarious position they were in. Bed, half naked, together. Hailey would be lying if she said she wasn’t thinking about other things right now, how close they were to just taking that next step. Judging by the look on his face, he was thinking the same thing too.

“We should get up, before Will has a heart attack out there”, Hailey said as Jay nodded in agreement.

Jay followed Hailey into the kitchen and joined Will for breakfast. The three of them chatted for a while before getting ready for the day. Jason and Paul came in to let them know they’d be heading out on the boat by 10. 

They got the kitchen cleaned up, Jay and Hailey secretly starting to pack their things. Get them organized at least, in hopes Will wouldn’t notice. They didn’t bring a lot to begin with, but they started to gather all their items in case a quick getaway was needed later on.

Thankfully the bathing suit Agent Lee sent fit like a glove. No really, like a glove. Jay’s jaw practically dropped to the floor when he saw her in it. She gave him a cheeky wink and watched him look her up and down, mesmerized by her body. 

Will was at the kitchen island with his mouth dropped open seeing Hailey in the racy suit as well. He quickly averted his eyes trying not to stare. Hailey and Jay thought this was amusing.

“Come on Will, not you too. I expected this much from Jay, but you see way more skin than this on a day to day basis. Plus it’s like this is the first time either of you have seen a bikini before”, Hailey joked, clearly comfortable enough around the two of them to do so.

Jay smirked watching Will’s cheeks turn red, he was trying to be very respectful and not look at Hailey. She whistled at him, making him blush even more.

“It’s okay Will really. No need to stress.” Hailey kept laughing all the way back to her room. Jay followed closely behind, giving Will an “I hit the lottery” grin as he passed. Will didn’t know what to think about this. They had to be messing with him this morning, there’s no way they would have slept together, like really slept together, and be this casual about it. Or would they, now he wasn’t so sure. He laughed at his own scepticism.

Jason and Paul met them down at the dock and loaded the boat. Cooler full of beers, music, food, towels, sunscreen, floaties, the works. This looked like it was going to be a nice last normal day after all. The sun was shining, Will was already forcing the SPF on all of them. Hailey laughed, she tanned while she knew the two of them would burn. Their freckles and Irish heritage against them. Jay helped Will cover his cast with a plastic bag and duct tape, to prevent it from getting wet.  
“At least you can swim now”, Jay laughed as Will looked down, not impressed that he had to do this for the day.

“True, I’ve been dying to get in the water it’s been so hot.”

They boated around for a while, took a break to swim and float in the lake. The weather was perfect and the drinks were going down smooth. It was after lunch by the time Hailey wanted to test the waters and get out on the wakeboard.

“You want to go first?” Paul asked her. 

“Ya of course, I haven’t done this in ages”, she replied.

Jay looked at her cautiously, “Be careful”, he told her, knowing what was at stake later. She couldn’t afford to get hurt.

She smirked back. “I’ll be fine Jay, this is second nature to me.”

She put on her life jacket and hopped in the water, clipping herself into the wakeboard. She gave the thumbs up to Jay who was spotting her. He turned around and told Paul she was ready to go. Within seconds of the boat pulling away, Hailey was up on her feet and riding the waves. Jay was impressed, he didn’t doubt her, but he figured she would be a little rusty at least. She rode the wake while Paul circled the boat, testing her skills. She didn’t lose control once. Eventually she let go of the rope and gently fell into the water.

They pulled the boat back around as she was treading water lightly, her feet still in the board.

“Okay your turn Jay”, she smiled.

“What? No. I won’t be any good”, he replied nervously.

“You can just try wake surfing if you don’t want to be clipped into the board. It might be a bit easier for you.”

“Wakeboarding, wake surfing… I can’t keep up”, Will said.

“It’s exactly what it sounds like. Surfing behind the wake of the boat. You’ll be closer and not strapped in, so if you fall it wont hurt as bad”, Hailey laughed.

Jay reluctantly agreed. He jumped in the water and swam over to Hailey who had switched the board out for him. 

“Okay, you’re going to start on your back like this,- she showed him- with the board under the water.”

She handed Jay the board and helped him get in position and handed him the tow rope. 

She hopped onto the back of the boat and made sure the rope wasn’t tangled and had enough slack. 

“When the boat gets going, let it pull you up, don’t try and fight it and pull yourself up to stand”, she yelled over the motor. 

Jay nodded and gave her the thumbs up and held on for dear life. His first few attempts were unsuccessful and he was starting to get frustrated. He considered himself an athletic guy, but this was foreign to him. It didn’t help that Will and Hailey were laughing their heads off from the back of the boat watching him either. Eventually he said he was done, but Hailey wasn’t letting it go. She was determined to help him surf by the end of this afternoon, even if it meant more wipe outs.

“I’ll show you what I mean, it might help to see it done first”, she winked at him as he rolled his eyes. She was clearly enjoying being way better than him at something.

She slipped back into the lake and grabbed hold of the board and the rope. To completely show Jay up, she got up on the first try one-handed. She held on to the rope strictly to show him for a few minutes, her body smoothly riding the wake back and forth, close to the back of the boat. He was trying to focus on her form, but all he kept staring at was her figure. That bathing suit…was something else on her. Eventually she tossed him the tow rope, not needing it for stability and rode the wave effortlessly. She grabbed her edges and spun around, really looking like she was in her element. Eventually she stopped and went back into the water. She dunked her head in to cool off while Paul got the boat turned around back to her. She had a smug smile on her face as Jay held out his hand to help her back into the boat. She climbed up the ladder, and ran her hands over her face and wet curly hair. 

“Alright, we get it. You were a wake surfing champion back in your day”, Jay said sarcastically, still bitter he wasn’t able to get up on the board.

“Like I said Jay, just like riding a bike”, she was really getting a kick out of this.

“How are you so good at that though, really?” Will inquired. He too was impressed by her athleticism. 

“I grew up by a lake. It’s cold up in Canada for most of the year. The winter is for pond hockey, but the summer is for water sports. The weather is only nice for such a short period of time, have to make the most of it. We spent all of our summers on the water with friends”, she smiled, remembering those days fondly.

“Classic Canada”, Jay retorted, Will chuckling behind him.

“Okay, we’re going to get you up there Jay. But you have to trust me”, she said mischievously. 

He shrugged his shoulders and hopped back in the water. Will watched on from the back of the boat, resuming his spotting position. Whatever Hailey told Jay caused him to raise his eyebrows and look at her surprised. Will figured they were going to try tandem surfing. If Jay couldn’t even pull himself up, how was he going to get up with Hailey also on the board. He watched as she tried to explain what they were going to do and laughed seeing Jay’s sceptical reaction as well.

Jay floated behind her, holding onto the rope handle as they got in position. Hailey was in front of him with her feet on the board and her hands more choked up on the rope. She gave the all clear and Will was crawling with anticipation to see how this was going to turn out. To his surprise, they actually managed to pull themselves up the second time, with Hailey guiding Jay where he needed to be. Hailey was closer to the front of the board, and Jay’s legs were stacked in between hers. They slowly inched closer to the middle of the board for balance. Hailey was holding onto Jay’s front thigh and the rope in the other to steady herself. Jay was focused on the task at hand, but couldn’t help but notice Hailey’s hand in close proximity to him, grazing his backside as she adjusted her balance. Their bodies were very close together. He felt Hailey’s hips move along with the board. He followed her lead and matched her smooth movements, rocking back and forth with her, letting her take charge. 

Before long, they were surfing together as if they had been doing this for years. Jay was surprised he was all of a sudden able to pull this off, even though he knew most of the hard work was being done by Hailey. But with most things, they were incredibly in sync with each other, that’s why it was working so well. 

Unbeknownst to them, Jason handed Will his cell phone and quietly told him to take a picture of this. Will snapped the memory quickly, noticing how comfortable they both looked together, natural, very much on the same page with each other’s movements. Almost like they knew what the other was thinking before having to ask. Their bodies fit perfectly together, matched each other and they rode the wake with ease. Eventually Hailey dropped the rope and Will pulled it back into the boat. That left the two of them up still, and Jay had nothing to hold on to except Hailey’s hips in front of him. Her tiny frame was in between his legs, she was in a semi squatted position. He really had to keep his mind from going somewhere else or this was going to get awkward fast. They were in a compromising position to say the least. She sensed his fear and laughed half looking back at him as she brought her hips closer, gently hovering over his mid section. She was doing it on purpose, teasing him. Two can play at that game he thought. He reached his right arm around her back, his hand finding it’s final resting place on the crest of her hip bone. He felt the goose bumps rise off her bare skin and smirked in victory. His left hand had moved to hold her left hand as they finished off their session in the water several minutes later, eventually falling back after losing the wave. Their friends in the boat cheered them on as they fell in the lake together.

Will was pleased with himself, he got a couple of very cute, very incriminating, very blackmail worthy photos of the two of them. He had to admit it though, they looked good together. 

They pulled the boat around satisfied for the day with water sports and ate some snacks and had a few beers together with Will, Jason and Paul. Jay unfolded a towel and wrapped it around Hailey’s shoulders. The lake wasn’t too cold, but she had been in long enough that she was shivering by the time she got out. She smiled at him as he rubbed his hands up and down her arms to warm her up. 

“Where to now kids?” Jason yelled from up front, breaking their eye contact.

The rest of the afternoon flew by, much to their disliking. They were trying to hold on to every bit of summer that they could, resting in the sun on the boat, listening to country music. What a perfect afternoon it was. The boat pulled up to the dock a few hours later, Hailey hopping out first to help dock it. Jay didn’t think it was possible to like Hailey anymore than he already did, but after today he certainly had a different perspective of her past. It was insanely attractive seeing her in the water, on the board, docking and driving the boat. She was clearly in her element here, yet another secret part of her life that he discovered. It left him wanting to know more, to find out more about the woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. He had a lifetime to figure it out.

They got dried off and brought everything back up to the cottage. Jay took one last look at Hailey in her bathing suit, committing that to his memory for sure. She gave him a look, begging him to say what he was really thinking, but he just smiled back at her and winked. Jay didn’t look half bad in his bathing suit either, Hailey thought. The way his abs formed into that ever so perfect v…she had to shake herself out of that thought too.

Jason popped his head in, saying that Agent Lee would be calling in half an hour. Jay and Hailey’s blissful looks turned into serious ones and nodded at the other before getting showered and ready for the night ahead.

The phone call went as well as expected. There was a lot of yelling on Will’s part, then some fear, then some more yelling once he figured out Jay and Hailey knew about this plan already. He was mad that they didn’t give him a heads up, but ultimately understood after they explained it to him. They really did have a nice day today, and he could appreciate them wanting to give him that. 

Agent Lee calmly explained what the next steps would be. Will was going to make a phone call to Natalie. They didn’t know where Marco was, but they knew that he was still keeping tabs on Natalie’s phone since Will, Jay and Hailey’s were radio silent. She was the connecting piece.

Even Jay and Hailey felt uneasy about that, bringing her into this. But Agent Lee assured them she was on the mend as well and had been briefed about what was happening. Once Will phoned her, they were expecting Marco to track the call, leading him to this location. If he really was in St. Louis, it could take him a while to make it to them. Sometime in the middle of the night for a surprise attack they assumed. 

They sat around the kitchen table, all staring at Will, waiting for him to make the move. It was just about 6 o’clock. That gave them about an 8 hour window for Marco to drive to them give or take. 

As nervous as Will was, he was over the moon to hear Natalie’s voice. Agent Lee had written out a script of things for him to say, to stall long enough to be able to track Marco. Will referred to it to keep his story straight, but didn’t really need it. He was catching Natalie up on the last few weeks, making up for lost time. He asked how she was feeling and she did the same for him. He told her that he was much better, Hailey and Jay took good care of him while he was sick and helped him get during his recovery. He told her about the boat today, all the nights they’ve spent by the fire, playing games, talking about life. He looked up to see what was happening, Hailey motioned to him to keep the conversation going. They were close, judging by the look on Jay’s face and his eyes towards the computer he was using to trace the call. It was around the five minute mark that Paul gave Will the thumbs up, signalling that they tracked Marco’s cell location. He was in a car, on the move towards them now. Unfortunately that meant Will had to hang up on Natalie, and cut their call short.

“I love you Nat, I’ll see you soon”, Will said with emotion in his voice. 

“I love you too Will”, she replied. Jay gave Hailey’s shoulder a small squeeze. They too were relieved that Nat was okay. The last time they saw her, she was in really bad shape. After the call ended, Will let out a deep breath.

“What now?”

“Now, we wait”, Jason replied.

Will was uneasy to say the least about this situation, but he had all the trust in the world in his brother and Hailey, Jason and Paul too. They didn’t completely fill him in on the tactical part of the night ahead, but assured him that they would keep him safe, that Marco wouldn’t even be able to get near him and that he would have a vest on. As far as Marco knew, the three of them were at this cottage, but didn’t know that it was an FBI safe house or that Jason and Paul were there with them too. There was a chance he did know that though and would bring back up. But, hopefully, if all went according to plan, Marco would be outnumbered and an easy take down. His immediate turn around told them that he was desperate, and didn’t exactly have a master plan.

Hailey and Jay ran through some things with Jason and Paul and got their weapons ready while Will put some pizza in the oven for dinner for all of them. They would go on to call it an early night. Being in the hot sun on the boat all day tired them out, and both Hailey and Jay thought it would be best to get a few hours of sleep before their night ahead. Will noticed that they both went into Hailey’s room and shut the door, not really hiding the fact that they had been falling asleep together anymore. This was going to be their last night here, maybe they couldn’t do this once they were back in Chicago, Will thought. He made a mental note to ask Jay about that increasingly obvious situation later. Will wanted his bed too and made his way down the hallway just as the sun was setting. Jason and Paul weren’t going to sleep, they would keep watch and wake them up later on once they knew Marco was close or if anything changed. Will waved to them as they headed back to their bunkie, fresh cups of coffee in their hands.

Down the hall, Hailey rubbed Jay’s back until he fell asleep, it didn’t take too long. He got a little sunburnt today, his freckles out on full display. The warmth coming off his body made her feel safe and secure. The drowsiness hit her, and it wasn’t long before she was out too.

Hailey being the deep sleeper that she was, was oblivious to him tossing and turning. 

The next time Jay opened his eyes, it wasn’t to get up for their night mission like he first thought. His heart was pounding so loudly in his chest, his ears were ringing and he felt dizzy and short of breath. He had no idea what brought this on, until… Bang, Bang, Bang, off in the distance. He flinched. Gun shots? He thought to himself. Suddenly, he was back in a place he never wished to see again, flashes of the desert and the carnage replaying in his brain. He felt the cold sweats coming on, the panic, and could hear the voices of his unit in the back of his mind. Halstead, cover the back, Mouse yelled. Jay rubbed his eyes, he couldn’t shake this feeling. You’re in bed with Hailey, in Wisconsin, he told himself. Then there it was again, Bang, Bang, Bang, crackling and ringing out in his ears. It felt like the noises were coming from inside of their room they were that close. He instantly started shaking, he was losing control and didn’t know what to do. It had been years since he felt this terrible. Hailey was fast asleep next to him, unaware of what was unfolding. Jay quietly got up from the bed, making sure not to wake Hailey or Will, and tip toed out of the room. If he was going to have a panic attack, he would rather do it privately. Everything that had happened lately had forced him on auto pilot, there were responsibilities he had and things to do. He didn’t have time to think about himself or how he was feeling. But now he did, and that’s usually when the trouble started. He quickly went out to the living room, and to the deck to get some fresh air. 

Will hadn’t really been able to get to sleep. Years of night shift took it’s toll on his body, he found it difficult to fall asleep this early. So, he got up to grab a glass of water a while later and to his surprise, found Jay curled up in the corner on the floor next to the couch. He was shaking violently, a strange look in his eye, like he wasn’t all the way here with them. Will set his glass down carefully and went to try Hailey’s approach with Jay, telling himself not to be scared of his brother. But Jay looked at him like he had no idea who he was so Will instantly backed off.

“Don’t you hear that Mouse? Nate and Luke are out there, under heavy fire…We need to go help them or they aren’t going to make it”, Jay said pointing outside, a panicked, determined look in his eye. Will became more concerned now, Jay was clearly having some sort of flashback. He had never seen this happen, it was usually just the nightmares, but never actually reliving his trauma. This couldn’t be happening at a worse time. Marco was on his way, he needed to get Jay out of this continuous loop he seemed to be in, and quickly. He slowly crouched down to him, playing along so Jay would let him get close enough to help him. 

“Jay, it’s me, Mouse. Tell me what to do, what’s our plan?”

A switch went off in Jay’s brain. This wasn’t Mouse, it was Will. He blinked a few times, looked around and got scared. He didn’t know how he got here, he wasn’t sure what happened. Will looked terrified, Jay looked him up and down and was thankful he didn’t get violent with him. He looked down at his hands, trembling, the cold sweats over powering any other bodily function. Will’s voice sounded distant, he couldn’t make out what he was saying, but he jumped back when he felt Will’s hand on his knee.

“Whoa, it’s okay Jay, it’s alright. You’re safe. Do you want to go back to bed?” Will said calmly and quietly.

It looked like Jay was going to calm down and agree to that when suddenly his eyes went wide and he curled his body back up into the fetal position. 

“Nooo! Make it stop!” Jay cried out, grabbing his ears and putting his head between his knees, rocking back and forth. Will had no idea what brought this on or how to help him out of it. This was a first for him too. Then, something outside caught his eye. Colourful pops and explosions lighting up the lake. The source of his brother’s fear and pain. Fireworks.


	30. Fireworks...I'm going to take care of you

Chapter 30 

Will sat on the floor with his brother, who was paralyzed with fear, trying to find a way to console him. But Jay was having a hard time, and refusing to let Will touch him without lashing out. He tried everything; holding his hand, rubbing his back, talking to him, telling him they were just fireworks- not gunshots, and tried to get him to look at the colourful display instead of closing his eyes. But, Jay wasn’t having any of it. He kept alternating between his current and past reality, flinching every time the fireworks went off. Will had never seen his PTSD this bad before. Sure, he had seen some terrible times, but now those seemed to pale in comparison to what he was watching unfold tonight. The minutes that had gone by felt like hours, to both Will and Jay. Every once in a while Jay would apologize to Will for his behaviour. Internally, he knew that Will was just trying to help him, but externally, he was resisting it. Will was keeping his composure, trying his best to understand what was happening here, thinking back all of the years to his psych training in med school, but he was drawing a blank. He knew from experience with previous episodes that sometimes the only thing to do was let Jay ride it out, calm himself down, however long that may take.

Usually it stopped by now, or Jay could regain some control after letting things out, but this panic didn’t seem to be letting up anytime soon. Will felt the inside of his wrist to find his pulse racing. His breathing was laboured and shallow, he was going to make himself throw up or pass out if he didn’t come out of this soon. 

“I’m going to go get Hailey okay”, Will whispered as he sat across from his brother, not knowing what else to do.

Jay nodded slowly, barely lifting his head to acknowledge Will. He needed Hailey.

Will crept back into her room, his body stiff with every step from sitting on the floor for so long. He stood over her and rubbed her arm to wake her up. It took a few tries, Will almost laughed. For being a cop and someone who is supposed to be able to go from 0 to 100 at the drop of a hat, she certainly was a deep sleeper.

Hailey’s eyes opened and she jumped when she saw Will hovering over her. She quickly shot up in bed.

“Are you okay Will? Something wrong?” She asked as he grabbed his arm at the elbow.

“Not with me…” Will said slowly as she looked to the empty spot in bed next to her where Jay once was.   
“Oh shit”, Hailey became concerned. She threw on Jay’s hoodie and followed Will out of her room.

“How bad?” She asked as they walked down the hallway towards the kitchen.

“I have never seen him like this before. And that is saying a lot”, Will said grimly.

Hailey’s face fell, unsure what she was about to walk out to. 

“Where is he?”

“Living room. He literally will not let me touch him. I don’t know what happened, well I do, but… I, I.. thought he was doing okay”, Will said confused.

“It’s an ongoing thing. Triggers can come out of nowhere. A lot has happened in the last few weeks, he doesn’t handle this sort of stress well. I should have seen it coming, tried to help him”, Hailey felt guilty. As much as her and Jay were spending quality time together here, most of their focus had been on Will and making sure he was on the mend. She didn’t even think to ask how this week had affected him, and how he was dealing with the stress.

Hailey felt her heart constrict when she turned the corner and found Jay curled up in a ball on the floor next to the couch, rocking back and forth. She knelt down in front of him, gently placing a hand on his feet, trying not to startle him. His knees were squeezed tightly to his chest and his body jolted when Hailey’s hand made contact with his leg.

“Whoa, Jay. It’s just me”, she said softly. Still nothing. 

Hailey understood why he was like this as she watched the fireworks show across the bay. The fireworks going off were really stressing him out, that much was obvious. She wished there was a way to let people know to stop letting them off. 

“Jay. You have to breathe okay. Slow breaths in and out remember. You’re going to make yourself sick.” She tried to breathe with him, slow him down but nothing was working, she was afraid he was going to make himself pass out. The only response that he was giving her letting her know he was still in there was the tight grip he had on her hand. His knuckles were white trying to hold onto her and pull himself out of the deep end. Will noticed this, at least he was able to realize it was Hailey there with him, he was trying to do the hand thing with her. 

She slid closer to him slowly, making sure she didn’t surprise him by touching him, until she was sitting side by side with him. He turned his head and opened his eyes ever so slightly to look at her, she could see the immense fear and pain written across his face. She nodded, letting him know it was okay to feel the way he was feeling, that she would do whatever he needed her to. Her silent communication told him that she would sit next to him, or hold his hand, or let him lie in her arms as long as he needed, it was his call.  
He got it and slowly unrolled himself from the ball he was in and turned his body to face her. It took a minute, but Jay finally reached out to Hailey, wanting to let her help him. 

“There, that’s it”, she said softly as he inched his way towards her, and put an arm around his shoulder and pulled him close to her chest, letting her other arm fall downwards to calmly stroke the side of his face.

Every crackle and pop that went off Jay seemed to get smaller and smaller in her arms, twitching and cowering after each one, like he was trying to escape his own body. Hailey felt helpless, but all they could do was wait it out. Jay was trying to take deep breaths, but they were interrupted by the small cries escaping his mouth. 

It hurt Will to see Jay like this, so terrified, he had never seen him like this before. He wasn’t asleep and having a nightmare, he wasn’t having a total flashback to the war, but he was somewhere in between, stuck in a purgatory of real life and his past one. His head was buried against Hailey’s chest, she was trying to shield his ears from the noises but that was proving to be difficult. He was still very much hyperventilating, shaking and sweating, all symptoms which concerned Will. As far as he knew Jay had been okay as of late, he had gotten things under control. But this was a stark reminder that episodes like this could creep up out of nowhere and be caused by the smallest things, such as celebratory fireworks on a long weekend in the summer. The irony of it all he thought, fireworks to celebrate Independence Day and other holidays, when really many veterans probably had to deal with this when they were let off.

“His heart is racing”, Hailey whispered nervously to Will as she felt the rapid thumps against her own chest, who then looked on at Jay with worry in his eyes.

Will got up to make him a cold compress, something that would relax him enough to slow things down. He was trying to help in whatever limited capacity he could. He came back out from the bathroom with a damp washcloth to find Jay even more sweaty and pale. Hailey held it against his neck with one hand and rubbed small circles in his back with her other, nodding thankfully at Will.

Jay’s brain was working overtime trying to tell him to relax but also freak out at the same time. His anxiety had not been this bad for a long time, everything seemed heightened. He was convinced his hearing was working overtime tonight too. He knew the sounds were fireworks, but couldn’t help but second guess himself every time they went off. Hailey and Will were doing their best to keep him calm and help him through this but he knew he was too far gone. He hadn’t felt one this bad since the first year he had come back home for good. That was a really dark time in his life and he hated reliving it, for more reasons than one. 

“You deserve everything good Hailey. I can’t give you that, I’m so sorry”, Jay eventually tearfully admitted what he thought she was thinking all along. Will’s eyes went wide, feeling his brother’s sadness, what sort of inner turmoil it must have taken for him to tell her that. But Will knew that Hailey would stand by him through this, he would bet his own life on it. After thinking about it for a second, he realized in a way, he was sort of doing just that, tonight. 

After grabbing a quick glance at Will, who was frozen in place watching this conversation transpire, she tried to find the words to reassure her partner.

“Jay.” Hailey just shook her head and stared at him, the familiar tone she really only used with him and flashed him one of her signature soul piercing gazes. Similar to the one he gave her in the lunch room when she told him he would forget about her just fine. Their eyes said it all. 

“When I said I’d follow you blind, I really meant that. Even if that means going down a dark tunnel with you. I will choose you every time. You’re my best friend Jay, we’re going to get through this together”, she said as she gently wiped away a few of his tears. 

The look on his face was….surprised? How could he still be doubting her love for him? This was part of the mental burden he had though, she couldn’t blame him for it. Before he had a chance to respond, if he was going to at all, they braced themselves for the finale.

They were nearing the end of the fireworks show, she could tell by the onslaught of pops and whistles and bursts of red in the sky. This was the peak time of distress for Jay who was trying with all his might to make the sounds and smells and vivid images go away.

As she suspected, Jay had one last flashback burst in him. She felt his body go rigid and his breathing speed up again.

“We have to get to them, Mouse is out there”, Jay whimpered, trying to fight his way out of Hailey’s grip.

“Jay you’re not in Afghanistan, you’re in Wisconsin”, Will tried to remind him.

“No, no, I’m not here, I have to help them, please let me out”, he pleaded through the tears. 

“You are here, I promise, Will and I are with you”, Hailey added, trying to keep her arms around him so that he wouldn’t hurt himself.

“No, no, no”, he kept saying, shaking his head as the fireworks continued to light up the sky. Hailey wasn’t sure how much longer she would be able to hold on to him, he was starting to struggle more, and he was much bigger and stronger than her. 

So, she released him from her grasp and moved to kneel in front of him, no longer sitting by his side. Making a split second decision that might change everything.

“Jay look at me”, Hailey was nervous, and this was definitely not how she imagined this happening for the first time, but she knew she needed to do this. It might be the only thing that would ground him enough to grasp reality. He lifted his head slightly, staring into her eyes with his bloodshot, puffy ones. She gently reached up and grabbed his face in her hands, kissing him softly, without hesitation. His lips parted, accepting her, loving her back. She felt Jay respond and return the kiss, his body relaxing just enough to realize what was happening. His hand came up to grab the back of her head too, reciprocating the passion and love Hailey so hoped that she was conveying to him. All the tension, past and present, and years of build up, disappearing in an instant. Their lips meeting for the first time sent a shock through Hailey’s body. It lasted only a few seconds, but felt like a lifetime, time stood still. They parted, Jay’s lips lingering over Hailey’s for just a second longer and all he could think about was how much he wanted to do that again. Hailey kept her face close to his, having a minute to take the moment in, the taste of him sending chills down her spine. They stared at one another as Will watched on with his mouth wide open, smiling. You could practically feel the sparks flying off the two of them. He was sure they both temporarily forgot he was even there.

“I’m right here Jay and so are you”, Hailey whispered as she touched her forehead to his, still holding on to his cheek with one hand, the other behind his neck. 

Jay took a few deep breaths and nodded while holding onto Hailey, pulling her in as close as he could. “I’m right here”, she kept repeating in his ear, running her hand along his back until he was calm enough to speak. 

“Hailey why is this happening?” He asked quietly, both out of frustration, and the need for answers about what was going on in his own head.

“Because you’re human Jay. And you’ve seen a lot of bad things, the worst sides of humanity both on home soil and overseas. And as much as I love our thing, I think you need more. When we get home, we’re going to get you some help.” Hailey told him, looking to Will for support on this. He nodded back to her, and to her surprise, so did Jay, in agreement. She felt relieved, to her this meant he was ready to accept help. He had been through a lot in the last year, things that he hasn’t fully processed. And that was okay, there was no shame in needing help again, taking care of your mental health is important. Coasting through life on auto pilot wasn’t quite cutting it anymore, and he knew that. 

“I’m scared”, Jay admitted quietly, only loud enough for her to hear it. 

“I know, I know”, she held him close again. “It’s okay, I’m going to take care of you”, she replied in a hushed tone as she ran her fingers through his hair until he fell asleep.


	31. Two gun shots

Chapter 31

After the fireworks were over, Jay had finally given in to his tired body and Hailey’s coaxing, and calmed down enough to get some sleep. His breathing had returned to normal and he was out cold, slouched against Hailey comfortably. Will had come over and gently covered them with a blanket. Hailey checked the time, 11 o’clock. Judging by her calculations that didn’t leave a ton of time between now and Marco arriving. 

“Will why don’t you go back to bed? Get some rest, I’ll be fine here”, Hailey whispered. 

“I’m not leaving him this time”, Will replied definitively, Hailey nodding and smiling back at him for that.

Then, she motioned to Will, who was still sitting across from them to switch places with her. His eyes went wide, it was his turn to be scared. What if Jay didn’t want that? And freaked out again if he wakes up in a panic to find Hailey not there with him? They would be starting from scratch, he just finally relaxed. Hailey sensed that and whispered reassurances to him. “It’s alright Will, he just needs someone to hold him.”

She smoothly switched places with Will and let him slide in under Jay. He put his arm around his brother, who didn’t stir thankfully. Hailey moved Will’s arm to the places she knew would keep Jay calm. “Just like that, see you’re fine”, she smiled at him.

“I need to go do a time check with Jason and Paul and see what’s happening. We’ll decide what to do about this shortly okay?” She whispered. Will nodded, hoping she wouldn’t be gone long.

Hailey quickly snuck outside to the bunkie, releasing a deep breath along the way. This wasn’t good. She never questioned Jay’s ability, but this was different. She wasn’t sure he was 100 percent. And he really needed to be 100 percent tonight, or else it could jeopardize this whole mission, they were so close to getting Marco. Also adding to the chaos was that kiss. There was a lot to unpack about everything that had happened here, but she needed to save it and focus and get through the next few hours.

She briefly alluded to the fact that Jay wasn’t feeling well to Jason and Paul. Paul was an ex-marine and she could tell he knew something was up.

“Fireworks?” He nonchalantly prodded. Hailey nodded her head silently, confirming what was going on. 

“I understand. They startled me too, I’ve been where he is before. Best thing to do is let him sleep a bit longer. Hopefully he wakes up refreshed. If not, we will cross that bridge when we come to it.”

Jason jumped in, “Marco is about 3-4 hours out. We’ve confirmed with traffic cameras that it is in fact him in the vehicle, he appears to be alone.”  
“Okay thanks, give me a heads up later. I’m going to head back over there and look after him”, Hailey replied, him meaning Jay.

Jason and Paul nodded sympathetically, Paul pausing to dig something out of the drawer for Hailey. He handed her a pair of noise cancelling headphones. “In case anything else happens.”

She smiled at him, grateful he was understanding. They could easily be mad, this was the worst possible timing and they needed everyone’s head in the game. 

Meanwhile, back in the cottage, Will could feel Jay starting to come to. He braced himself for another outburst, anger that he had traded places with his partner. But instead, Jay looked up, realizing his brother was holding him, not Hailey, and didn’t pull away. Will paused, hesitant to say anything, but gently put a hand on Jay’s back to comfort him instead. He was silent for a few minutes, until Will heard his voice.

“I miss mom”, Jay said quietly, without looking at Will. The last time he was this distraught, he was living at home with his parents right after he came home while Will was off in New York at medical school. They didn’t truly know what happened to him overseas but they certainly saw and lived through the immediate aftermath of it, that was a rough couple of months back stateside. His mom was so sick then too, she was doing all she could to fight for her own life while still trying to take care of Jay, her baby. She used to hold him during the night just like Hailey and Will were doing now, only she was weak and couldn’t do it for as long.

Will was thrown off by Jay’s sudden openness, although he welcomed it. 

“I know. I miss her too Jay. It’s okay to miss her. She’s watching over us now. She was so proud of you, dad was too he just had a funny way of showing it”, Will whispered as Jay cried some more. Will shook his head, at his own foolishness.

“I should have been there. I’m so sorry Jay”, apologizing for the millionth time about this, but for the first time really understanding what he had done, the added pain he caused by not being there for his brother when he really needed him. 

Life had been unfair to the Halstead brothers, particularly Jay. His relationship with his dad had always been rocky at best, and only continued to deteriorate after their mom died. It was like their mom was holding the family together, and after she passed, things changed. Pat Halstead had always been closer and more fond of Will, so Jay thought. But his mom, that was another story. Jay and his mom were so close. Being the youngest, he was always a mama’s boy. It crushed him near the end of her life that he had just closed himself off emotionally to everyone and everything. Things with Hailey made him feel differently, but with that came a lot of re-opening of old wounds, forcing him to deal with feelings and events that he hadn’t thought about in a long time. It was a good thing, his therapists told him. To let this out, that he would feel better. But the truth is, he wasn’t sure if this really made him feel better at all. He had this urge in his gut to push Hailey and Will away, to go back to how things were. Wake up each day, go to work, have drinks with his friends occasionally and go home, routine. That wasn’t what he wanted forever, but he didn’t know if he had it in him right now to work through the rest.

“Please stop running Jay, let us help you”, Will said. 

He didn’t give Will enough credit for knowing him as well as he did, reading his mind just then. Running away was all Jay knew, how to handle his problems. But it was time to face the music, and face this head on. Jay didn’t verbally respond, but just nodded his head at his brother. He was scared of opening Pandora’s box, but knew that if things were going to get better, it had to be this way.

“Hailey isn’t going anywhere, you know that right?” Will said out loud the other thing that Jay had been stewing about. 

“She says that now, but what if things get worse? This becomes too much for her to handle? Wouldn’t be the first time…” Jay spoke quietly, hardly believing the own words coming out of his mouth. He knew Hailey better than that, but his inner self-confidence and fear was taking over.

Will laughed. Didn’t even try to hide it, straight up laughed at his brother and shook his head. 

“Jay, look where we are right now. I woke her up from a dead sleep, before a very important night ahead. She did not flinch or panic, she just held you in her arms on the floor for the better part of an hour, rocking you to sleep. She’s been taking care of you this whole time, and that’s just what I’ve seen this week. I know there’s been plenty of other times, and you caring for her too. There is not a doubt in my mind that she wouldn’t walk out on you. You would be absolutely off your rocker to think that woman doesn’t love you as much as you love her.”

Now it was Jay’s turn to laugh, he let out a small chuckle at Will’s romantic speech. He was surprised by his bluntness, usually Will danced around the truth. 

“I do love her Will, for real.” Jay told him, finally admitting it out loud to his brother.

“I know you do, and she feels the same. Now do something about it”, Will tousled his hair.

Hailey walked back to the cottage a few minutes later, trying to be as quiet as possible. She could hear Will and Jay talking softly in the living room. So he was up, she thought.

Much to her surprise, Jay was still half lying down, letting Will keep his arms around him. He wasn’t fighting it, allowing Will to hug him. They looked like they were in deep conversation about something, so Hailey snuck down the hallway to her room instead, she had an idea. She grabbed all of the pillows and blankets from their beds and made her way back to Will and Jay.

“What’s all that?” Jay asked, the most he’s talked in a while.

“When I was little and scared of storms or the dark or had a nightmare, my brothers always used to build me a fort.” Jay’s lips curled up ever so slightly in a smile, and looked up at Will.

“We used to do that too”, Will replied, a small pang of emotion constricting his heart. Hailey gets Jay, she really does, without even knowing his past.

Jay slowly sat up, Will releasing his hold on him. Will helped Hailey set up a makeshift fort between the couches, letting Jay just rest on the carpet underneath them. The two of them felt like they were back in time, reliving a happy part of their childhood. Will disappeared for a second and Hailey and Jay both let out a laugh when they saw him dragging Hailey’s mattress out with him. 

“Will, watch your arm”, Hailey scolded.

“Oh it’s fine. My wrist feels much better.” Hailey rolled her eyes and smiled.

“Luxury fort design, the ten year old versions of ourselves would be smiling”, Will laughed.

They crawled under to lie down on either side of Jay, who was taking deep breaths again. 

“Just relax Jay, we have a few hours. Let’s get some sleep alright”, Hailey rubbed his hand.

He nodded and to everyone’s surprise, gravitated towards Will this time. Will looked over at Hailey and smiled, she thought she saw a few tears escape. 

“See Jay, you’re alright”, Will said as he put his arm around his brother. Although he was turned towards Will, his feet were tangled up with Hailey. She turned on her side and watched him as he fell asleep, she had her hand on his back too. She smiled and set an alarm on her phone for two hours later. Then it would be go time.

Her phone alarm jolted everyone awake. It was just past 1 in the morning and she needed to get herself and Jay ready to go. Will was awake, but Jay was still drowsy. She went back to grab him a shirt and his vest. When she came back, Will had managed to get him sitting up, but his eyes told her he was still half asleep. She approached him cautiously, needing to get him out of his shirt he had sweat through while having a panic attack. 

“Lift your arms Jay, let me help you”, she expected some resistance, but he smirked and let her do it. She pulled his shirt off over his head and helped him put a new one back on. He was yawning until she put his vest on for him, then his brain clicked into cop mode under the familiar weight sitting on his chest.

“Alright. What’s happening”, he said calmly.

Hailey knelt down and looked at him, directly in his eyes. “Jay, I need you to tell me if you’re good to do this. For real. It’s okay if you aren’t, but I need you to be 100 percent honest with me right now.”

He took a deep breath in, and took an inner survey of what was going on in his body.

“I’m good Hails, the sleep helped”, he looked at her sincerely and squeezed her hand, she believed him.

“Okay good”, she nodded and gave him a hand to pull him up off the mattress on the floor.

“Hailey what’s our game plan?” Jay asked her, looking to her for guidance. He wanted her to take the lead on this, he trusted her.

“Well, first things first is that you and I are going to sit down and have something to eat, and a coffee.” She wasn’t sure if coffee was a great idea for Jay, he was jittery enough as it was, but she certainly needed one. Maybe the familiar routine would make him feel more focused too.

“Then?” He asked.

“Jason and Paul are going to monitor Marco’s location. They’re going to let us know when he’s close. Planning on putting out spikes on the road to blow his tires, and go from there.”

“That’s it? That’s the plan?” Will interrupted.

Jay turned around to give him a “Not now” glare, but in some ways he did have the right to know. Hailey jumped in to reply.

“That’s how these things work Will, we have a basic plan, but we don’t know what’s going to happen. We have to be ready for anything. We’re going to try and take him alive, but… but if things go south…” Hailey trailed off, Will wasn’t stupid he knew what the other option was. 

“And where will I be during all of this?” Will asked fearfully.

“You’re going to be inside the cottage, Jay is going to stay in here and guard the door.”

Jay’s eyes instantly glared at Hailey, like hell he was leaving her out there without back up.

“Hailey, no”, Jay protested until she raised her hand.

“Jay, this is not up for discussion. I trust that you are feeling better now, really I do. But three of us out there will be plenty. Someone needs to stay in here with Will and I think it should be you. Less risk.”

Will looked to Jay, expecting him to react, but to his surprise he didn’t. He trusted what Hailey was saying, and realized her train of thought. She was just looking out for him, and the safety of everyone else here.

“Alright. But if anything happens, I’m coming out there”, Jay stated.

“Wouldn’t expect anything else”, Hailey grinned.

The two of them went off to eat and have a coffee, and out to the bunkie to talk to Jason and Paul. They informed them that Marco was 30 minutes away, they needed to get into position. The two agents ran through the plan with them several times again, making sure everyone was on the same page. 

The road leading to the cottage was quiet, and certainly at this time of the night they weren’t expecting any other cars to drive past the spikes they had set up. That was the risk they were taking anyways. 

Jason lifted his arm up, signalling that he was 5 minutes out. He motioned to Jay to go back inside and for Hailey to get behind him on the side of the road. Hailey looked back and gave Jay one of her nods, he looked into her eyes and nodded back. Just in case anything went wrong.

Jay ran back into the cottage and handed Will a vest and helped him put it on. 

“This is weird”, Will said, trying to calm his nerves by talking it out. Jay sensed that, and realized it was his turn to calm his brother down.

“I know man, but this will all be over soon, we’re going home”, Jay reassured him and hurried him behind the kitchen island as he stood watch over the doorways.

The moment had arrived, Hailey heard the sound of tires screeching around the winding roads leading to their location. Paul was on the other side of the road, her and Jason were the closest to the cottage. The adrenaline was coursing through her veins as she saw the glow of the headlights coming around the corner and Jason signalling for all of them to get down. All they could do was hope that Marco didn’t see the rumble strip and this would go off smoothly.

Seconds felt like hours as they watched Marco try to avoid the spikes on the road, but it was too late. They got a good look into his car, he was actually alone. His car blew a tire and veered off to the left towards Paul. They waited for the smoke to settle and went over to investigate, weapons drawn. 

However, when they approached the vehicle, they were dumbfounded when they no longer saw Marco.

“What the hell?” Jason said out loud, looking around.

“He couldn’t have gotten far, he’s likely injured. That’s a bad wreck”, Paul added, looking at the overturned vehicle in the ditch.

“Shit”, Hailey mumbled, instantly looking back towards the cottage and seeing a dark figure just out of the corner of her eye head around the side. How did he get out and fleece them so fast like that? Her blood pressure rose.

“Jay, Marco is headed towards the back entrance. Get yourself and Will into the bathroom and lock the door”, Hailey whispered into her earpiece.

Jay received the message, his demeanour instantly changing, Will saw the look in his eyes and knew something was wrong.

“Hailey, no I’m staying out..”

“Jay, that is an order. Do it now. We’re right behind him.” She said forcefully, he knew she meant business. This was her “I’m not going to ask you again” tone, that he was smart enough to not mess with.

He did as she said, quickly moving himself and Will to the back bathroom, locking the door behind them. He put his fingers up to his lips, to keep Will quiet, who was sweating profusely with nerves. Jay put his hand on Will’s hand, whispering “It’s going to be okay.”

Meanwhile, Hailey and Paul followed Marco behind the cottage, and Jason was going to cut him off on the other side. They didn’t hear anything, which felt eerie, and almost like an ambush was coming. 

Sure enough, Hailey heard a voice behind her that made her hair stand up. 

“Well, well, well, Hailey Upton we finally meet.”

His words stopped her and Paul in her tracks, he had them trapped. Jason was nowhere to be found. The two of them were pinned against the cottage and the bunkie. She grabbed one last glance at Paul, hoping he knew what she was thinking. 

Hailey slowly turned around, with her gun pointed at Marco, who appeared to be unarmed, which confused her.

“Shame you drove all this way just to meet me Marco”, Hailey said sarcastically. 

“Put your hands where I can see them”, Paul shouted, hoping he was loud enough for Jason to find them. 

Jay and Will heard this exchange from the bathroom, it was making his skin crawl, not being out there with Hailey.

“What would be the fun in that? I’ve come for Will Halstead and Will Halstead only. The rest of us, we can be friends right?”

“You aren’t getting to Will. It’s over Marco”, Hailey replied.

“That’s not what I told Natalie, once he sees this, he will be begging to trade himself for her. My friend just paid her a visit”, Marco sneered. 

Now it was Will’s turn to react, but Jay begged him to stay quiet.

“You’re lying”, Hailey laughed. 

“Am I?” Marco pulled out his phone and pressed play on a video. One of Natalie blindfolded and tied up in a room, crying out Will’s name. Hailey couldn’t confirm if the video was real or not, but she had to treat it as if it was.

“Alright, ball’s in your court Marco, what do you want?” She asked.

“I want Will released to me, and I need a way out of here, since you so rudely wrecked my car. Then Natalie goes free.”

“Not happening Marco, how do we know you’re telling the truth?” Paul replied.

“Guess you just have to take my word”, he laughed. “And Hailey, where is your boyfriend Jay? Been so looking forward to meeting him.” 

Her blood was boiling, he was just playing them, her and Paul both knew that. Buying himself some time, but for what? 

“Alright Marco, enough…”, Hailey was about to finish when she saw Jason pop out from behind the cottage, surprising Marco. 

The two of them started going at it, punching each other, wrestling around trying to get the upper hand. Marco clocked Jason in the side of the head, knocking him out cold. What Hailey and Paul didn’t see was that Marco had a small knife, one that he had concealed in his hand under his jacket. Hailey and Paul ran towards him, anticipating a violent take down. Hailey was out in front, until the last second she saw the knife that Marco was running at her with. She screamed for Paul, who instead of disarming Marco, stepped in front and took the brunt of the stab for her. He fell to the ground, screaming in pain. 

Will and Jay were getting nervous waiting inside of the bathroom.

“This shouldn’t be taking so long”, Jay whispered under his breath. 

His heart began pounding loudly in his ears again, he had to get out there. He couldn’t stand the thought of Hailey being out there with that monster. 

Until he heard them.

The unmistakeable, deafening sound of two shots being fired off.


	32. I always wondered what happened to you

Chapter 32

“What the hell was that?!” Will whispered as he stared at Jay, who looked frozen in space.

Jay shook himself out of the trance he was in, refusing to accept the idea that Hailey might be hurt. He put his struggles earlier in the night to the side and felt the adrenaline take over. He immediately got up and turned to Will.

“Lock this door behind me”, he said sternly as he went to leave the safety of the bathroom.

“No Jay, I’m coming with you, I’m a doctor. If someone is shot, I’m going to help them”, Will replied.

“You’re not coming with me. Not yet. I need to make sure things are safe. Lock the door, do not come out until I tell you to”, now it was Jay’s turn to give orders. Will had no choice but to follow them as he watched his brother leave into the uncertainty of the night.

He heard the gunshots coming from around the bunkie, so he quickly made his way over, his legs not moving fast enough for his need to get to her. There was a strange silence in the air that made him uneasy. It felt like this was a nightmare he wasn’t waking up from.

“No, no, no”, was all he could think. That was ringing out in his head so loudly he was sure he was actually saying it out loud. His heart was in his throat when he turned the corner to look for Hailey. That was until he saw them. Marco was lying out in front of her, dead. His heart stopped when he made eye contact with her.

“Hailey”, he let out softly, relief flooding his face. She saw the look in his eye, knowing he must have thought the worst. 

“I know. I’m okay”, she reassured him.

What Jay didn’t immediately notice was that Hailey’s hand was pressed against Paul’s side, in a similar place to his own injury earlier this year. That relief quickly disappeared when he looked around and realized the severity of the situation. Jason appeared to be unconscious a few feet in front of him. And a few feet in front of him were Hailey and Paul, Paul was bleeding through his shirt.

“Jay, I need you to go get Will. Right now”, she said calmly a split second later, trying to keep Paul awake. 

Jay didn’t even say anything in reply, he just turned and ran back towards the cottage to get Will. He reached the bathroom, and quickly filled his brother in on the situation. “Jason’s down, not sure what happened there. Paul’s bleeding pretty bad, looks like a stab wound.”

“Or gun shot?” Will asked, silently thanking the universe that Hailey was unharmed.

“Gun shots came from Hailey. Marco’s dead”, Jay confirmed. 

The two of them rushed back out to help Hailey. While Will checked everyone over, Jay radioed Agent Lee, confirming Marco was dead after checking his pulse again to be sure. Hailey fired these shots in very close range, Jay made note, perfect center mass kill shots.

Agent Lee was briefed on the injuries to her co-workers and told Jay that help was on the way. Vehicles were on their way to the cottage from another safe house location a few miles up the road. 

Will quickly took charge of the triage, realizing that Paul was in worse shape than Jason after Hailey filled him in on the events leading to this.

“How long has he been out?” Jay yelled to Hailey, regarding Jason. 

“Few minutes maybe, Marco clocked him pretty hard on the side of the head. I don’t think he’s hurt otherwise”, she said sounding shaken looking down at Paul.

“Jay, stay with Jason. Maybe just gently try to wake him up, talk to him. Should come to on his own hopefully. Let me know when he’s awake”, Will yelled as he shifted his focus back to Paul, who was still conscious.

“Paul, I need you to tell me how bad the pain is, on a scale of 1-10?” Will asked calmly, feeling around his abdomen and under his vest, doing a variety of other tests while he tried to gather additional information and put pressure on the gash.

“8”, Paul grunted back, gripping Hailey’s hand for moral support. 

“Alright, that’s not too bad. Looks like he missed the important stuff. Flesh wound is pretty deep though. You’re going to need this irrigated and stitched up. X-ray and ultrasound just to be sure. Stay still, an ambulance is on it’s way”, Will said as Paul nodded, trying to breath and clench through the pain in his side.

“Thank you Paul, I didn’t, I didn’t see the knife”, Hailey stammered. Jay overheard this, his ears perking up at her thanking Paul. That must mean that she was closer to getting hurt than he thought. Paul must have stepped in to protect her, he had to thank him for that later.

Dozens of flashing lights pulled into the driveway moments later, Agent Lee running out to the sound of Jay’s voice. “We’re over here”, he flagged them down.   
Paramedics quickly went over to Jason and Paul, Will filling them in on what he knew. Jason was starting to come to on his own, and was able to sit up and give coherent responses, which was a good sign.

“Concussion, some minor cuts and bruises, should be okay. We’ll bring him in to get checked out just in case”, one of the paramedics gave an update on Jason to Agent Lee, who was knelt down next to Paul.

Several other agents were crowded around Marco’s body, already taking photographs and collecting other evidence from him. Hailey was speaking to one of them and giving her statement, since she was the one who killed him after all. Jay waited in the shadows, observing the organized chaos in front of him. 

After Hailey was done, Jay was pulled aside to give his version of the events as well. They were thanked profusely for their actions tonight, Hailey lingering next to the stretcher, saying a few more things to Paul, who was nodding and smiling at her. Jay walked over to the back of the ambulance before he was loaded in and talked to him as well.

“Marines man”, Jay smiled as Paul let out a small laugh and shook his head.

“Someone has to do the dirty work. Wasn’t going to let him get to Hailey”, Paul whispered and winked as he looked at Jay then over to Hailey, clearly alluding to their more than just professional partnership.

“Thanks for everything Paul, I owe you one, take care of yourself”, Jay smiled, shaking his hand as Hailey repeated the same sentiments, squeezing his shoulder one last time as he was loaded into the ambulance. Jason hopped in the back, tagging along for the ride. Agent Lee had a minute with them before they were off too. Jay and Hailey slammed the doors closed and knocked on the back door, signalling they could drive away.

After those two were taken care of, Agent Lee came over to Will, Jay and Hailey. 

“Eventful night”, she smirked.

“You could say that”, Hailey let out an exhale. 

“You guys did great. I can’t thank you enough. We’ve been trying to catch this guy for years, never got close enough. The world is a better place without Marco in it.” 

“What now? Was that video of Natalie real?” Will replied nervously. Hailey’s eyes going wide, she briefly forgot about that. 

“Completely fake. That’s one of his signature scare tactics, we were anticipating that, and hoping you wouldn’t fall for it. Natalie and Owen are safe and sound, I have agents there right now who can confirm that.”  
The three of them let out a sigh of relief. 

“We’re going to get cleaned up here. The rest of my team will process the scene and take care of closing up the cottage. I’ll be heading back to Chicago with you guys shortly. Go in and get packed up, our ride will be here in 30 minutes.”

“Sounds good, thanks”, Will replied.

They didn’t have much to pack, but they went through the cottage room by room anyways, collecting all of their things, making sure they didn’t leave anything behind. Oddly sad to be leaving this place, it had grown on them. Twenty minutes later, Agent Lee came inside and let them know they were about to head out.

“You guys, I am really impressed by what you did tonight. Especially you Hailey, well done. Now, I don’t do this often, but I can’t think of a better time…”, Agent Lee addressed them and pulled out three of her cards to give to them.

“Get out of jail free cards? These are for real?” Will’s lips curled up into a smile. 

“Yes they’re real. Even better, this card will get you one favour from the FBI, no questions asked”, Lee smiled back. Hailey and Jay even raised their eyebrows and smirked at one another, not a bad card to be holding.

Before they could say anything else, Jay’s ears perked up to the familiar sound of an incoming chopper, and he froze.

“Sounds like our ride is here”, Agent Lee chuckled, oblivious to the fact that Jay might have a hard time with this, if he was even going to be able to do this at all.

Will and Hailey also froze and looked at each other when they realized how they would be travelling back to Chicago. Jay didn’t immediately react, so neither did they. They silently grabbed all of their things and made their way out to the boathouse, where the helicopter had landed on the roof.

“Thought you guys might like to ride home in style”, Agent Lee smiled as she turned around to them once they had all climbed up to the roof, then quickly realized something was off.

Jay’s face went a little pale and Hailey and Will were acting strange as well. 

“Something wrong Detective?” Lee addressed Jay directly.

Jay paused before he spoke, looking to Will and Hailey before he replied.

“Um, I, uhh…”, he was struggling to get his words out. “I haven’t been in one since Afghanistan. The last time didn’t end so well”, was all he managed to get out.   
Agent Lee signalled to the pilot to shut the chopper down. “I see. I’m sorry I had no idea. Is this going to be okay for you? We can take a minute alright.”

Jay nodded slowly, taking a deep breath in. “Ya, I’m good. The more I talk about it, the less power it has over me right?” He said looking back to his brother and his partner who were beaming with pride. After the night Jay had, this was not the response they were expecting.

Agent Lee took a step closer to Jay and put a hand on his shoulder. “I get it man, really I do. My army unit in Afghanistan responded to this crash once, it was horrific, I will never forget what I saw that day. Took me a long time to be able to get in one of these. Out of 12 Rangers and many other civilians, we only pulled two guys out alive”, Agent Lee casually shook her head as Jay got chills down his spine and the hair stood up on the back of his neck.

“Was this in 2009 by any chance?” He inquired as his voice broke slightly, Hailey and Will looked at the two of them in shock.

“Yes…how did you…?” Agent Lee stopped herself as Jay gave her a that was me look.

Agent Lee put her hand over her mouth, looking Jay up and down, surveying his face, registering the familiarity to that day, instead of why she thought she initially recognized him earlier this year, just from crossing paths in their law enforcement careers. Never in a million years would she have guessed that’s why he looked slightly familiar to her. Plus that wasn’t exactly the sort of thing that just came up in conversation. She knew Jay was military but she never connected the dots. If he was anything like her, he probably works everyday to not think about the day, if he even remembers any of it at all. Her hand still on his shoulder, the wheels spinning in her head as she was slowly realizing the coincidence. “Oh my God, oh my God”, she shook her head. 

“Halstead”, Lee kept repeating to herself. “Your name patch on your uniform was destroyed, all we could make out was -ead. And we weren’t even that sure about that.” 

Things had really come full circle for Jay in this moment, Hailey and Will watched on, nervous what his reaction might be to this. Stunned to be witnessing this in general.

“I always wondered what happened to you. Now I know”, Agent Lee said softly, with tears in her eyes. 

“Wow”, Will said in awe, Hailey had goose bumps up her arms. The four of them stood there in silence, just letting that sink in. This was healing for Agent Lee as much as it was for Jay. Will and Hailey would never understand what the two of them had been through. Will used to think Agent Lee was this cold, heartless woman, who he was angry with for everything that happened in the fall. But maybe that was her defence mechanism, her own way of dealing with her pain, like Jay had his.  
“Sometimes if I slow down, I see that day. And you. You were so young, so…injured. Wow. This is overwhelming”, Lee said as her eyes fell to the ground, trying to get a hold of her emotions.

Jay hadn’t said anything for a while, he was strangely quiet. Just trying to process this newfound information. There was so much about that day he wanted to ask her about, he was desperate to fill in the gaps. But he quickly realized that day had as much of an impact on Agent Lee as it did for him, only in different ways. He could not believe that this was happening. All this time, Agent Lee was one of the ones who pulled him out of the wreck, got him to safety, and he had no clue. The universe works in mysterious ways.

Agent Lee was still looking down at the ground, shaking her head, trying to hold back the tears. Jay was aware of how she was feeling, he felt the same way just a few hours ago. 

“Should we say anything? I don’t know what to do,” Will whispered to Hailey.

“No, no”, she said slowly as she eyed them interacting. “I think they both need this.” She realized that what Jay needed all along was maybe just someone who knew what he actually went through, someone on the other side, someone that was there that day. Up until now, it was just him and Mouse to his knowledge. Someone who could help him relive that day in order to get past it. To really put it to bed. What he struggled with most was the unknowns, and the what if’s of that accident. Things he thought he would never get answers to. Maybe now was his chance.

“Can I give you a hug?” Jay broke the silence.

Agent Lee raised her head slowly to meet his glance, her eyes filled with tears.

“Of course”, she said as Jay embraced her tightly. 

“Thank you. This means more to me than you know”, he whispered, barely keeping it together himself, as he held her there for an extended hug. 

Hailey and Will couldn’t hear what the two of them were saying to each other, but it was clear they were whispering something, lots of nodding, back rubbing. It was an incredibly powerful, emotionally charged moment. Will put his arm around Hailey’s shoulder as they watched on quietly, both realizing how much of a positive release this would be for Jay. There was someone right in front of him that could answer all of his questions, help him through the hard parts of that day that he was still holding on to. The missing piece, bridging the gap between his former and current self.

When Jay and Agent Lee finally parted a few minutes later, still shaking their heads in disbelief, it was time to focus back on what was happening right now, and continue with their trip home. All four of them wiped some tears away from their eyes and regrouped. 

“Alright. Wow, I am still…just wow”, Lee said clearly out of sorts, but looking at Jay gave her the strength to continue. If he could make it through what she saw him like that day in the desert and end up where he is now, there was hope for everyone. What a success story. It made her feel more at ease with her guilt and her trauma from that day. Jay nodded at the helicopter, signalling it was time to go. Lee nodded back and the pilot started the engine once again. 

Agent Lee ushered Will and Hailey in first, helped load the bags and then hopped in herself. Jay was the last one standing outside, the three of them anxiously watching to see if he was going to be able to go through with this.

Agent Lee saw his hesitation and extended a hand out to him to pull him back to reality. Jay blinked a few times, deeply inhaled and exhaled and then reached out to grab Lee’s hand to pull himself in. Will and Hailey sighed in relief as they watched him get in under his own free will.

“This will be better than the last time we were in a helicopter together”, she said with a slow smile appearing on her and Jay’s face.

“Let’s go home”, Jay replied.

The propellers loudly swished in the night air as the aircraft gained momentum, leaving the makeshift landing pad on top of the cottage boathouse. They looked out the window, into the quiet of the night, taking one last look at their hideout in the woods. Their departure was just like their arrival, cloaked in mystery, only this time they were disappearing in the wee hours of the morning. Maybe they would come back here someday, or maybe not. Either way, this place would leave a mark on all of them forever.

Hailey looked next to her to see Jay’s eyes closed and his hands tightly digging into his own thighs. That talk with Agent Lee helped him, but it was obvious he was still in a bit of distress, understandably of course. She nudged him and slipped him her hand, which he gratefully accepted, melting away a bit of his tension. 

“Breathe Jay, you’re doing great”, she reassured him as she kept an eye on him inhaling and exhaling slowly in his seat. 

The ride home was quick thanks to their method of transportation. They would be landing soon, their trip taking just over an hour. Hailey wasn’t sure if Agent Lee would be able to follow through on what she had asked her just before Jay hopped in the helicopter as they left Wisconsin. About forty five minutes into their flight, with the city on the horizon, Hailey saw Agent Lee answer a Face Time call on her phone and let out a huge grin. She nudged Will awake and motioned to what she did. A huge smile spread across Will’s face as he shook his head at Hailey. 

“Unbelievable”, he said as he saw who was on the other end of the call, realizing what Hailey must have done.  
“Jay, Jay, open your eyes”, Hailey shook him out of the survival mode he was currently in.

“Huh?” He asked her groggily.

Then he heard it through his headphone earpiece and his eyes went wide. He was looking around for the source of the voice and let out the most emotional facial expression Hailey had ever seen him make. It crushed her heart in all of the right places, confirming she did the right thing.

“Mouse”, he whispered, looking at the phone Agent Lee was holding up to him. It was barely audible, but they all heard the joy in his voice through their ear pieces.

“Jay!” Mouse cried out as he saw his friend come into the picture. 

“Man I’m so happy to see your ugly face”, Jay said fighting through tears, half laughing, half crying at this point. 

Mouse grinned back, from ear to ear, also elated to see his long time friend. 

“First time back in one of these since the accident?” Mouse confirmed.

Jay nodded his head, letting out a deep breath. Finding comfort in talking to Mouse during this ordeal. They could get through anything together. 

There was a flash of sadness and pain across Mouse’s face too, but he quickly hid it, trying to keep Jay’s mind off of things. 

“It took me a long time to be okay with them again. You’re doing great man. Want to fill me in on why I just received a Face Time from an FBI agent in the middle of my day?” Jay snorted at that.

“You wouldn’t believe me even if I told you.” Jay said turning the camera around to show Agent Lee in the front seat again. 

“By the way, this is who pulled us out of the crash that day. Agent Lee, FBI.”

Mouse’s face went blank, a look of confusion spreading across his face. “What?”

“You guys can call me Ingrid. But yes, that was me. My team came in to help get you guys out of there. I’m happy to see you back on your feet as well.”

“Wow. We’re all here for a reason right? Small world”, Mouse shook his head. 

“When you get back, we’ll all go out for beers and talk about it”, Jay replied.

“That sounds good to me. I’ll be home in a couple months. Where are you now?”

“On our way back to the city. There’s a few other people here too”, Jay said as he once again flipped the camera around to show Will and then Hailey.

“You must be Hailey”, Mouse said coyly as Jay blushed slightly. 

“Be cool man”, Jay rolled his eyes and smiled.

Hailey held back a smirk as she side eye glanced at her partner, guess he’s talked to him about her at some point. 

“In the flesh. Nice to finally put a face to the name, Mouse.”

“Well I’ve heard nothing but good things. Keep watching out for this guy okay?” Mouse told her and she nodded back, putting a hand on Jay’s knee. 

“Always.”

“What am I chopped liver?” Will cried out from behind Hailey, causing everyone to laugh. 

“Yeah, yeah. I was getting to you Will, had to talk to the pretty girl first. Nice to see you man, it’s been too long.”

“It really has, looking forward to seeing you when you’re back.”

“Listen Jay, I only have a few minutes here, sorry to cut this short. It’s been great to hear from you, see that you’re alright”, Mouse confessed.

“Twenty minutes out”, the pilot called out over the radio.

Jay looked out the window, “Just hang on for a second, you’re gonna want to see this.” He flipped his phone and showed his friend the sun gently rising over Lake Michigan as they approached home. The Chicago skyline magnificent in the morning light. The sky painted all shades of purple, pink and orange. Their busy city quietly waking up for the day.

“Wow. The best city in the world. I can’t wait to get home.” 

“The best damn city in the world”, Jay replied, Will and Hailey echoed his sentiments, realizing how lucky they were to live here. The view of the city from this height was breathtaking. 

“See you guys soon okay, I miss you all”, Mouse replied before signing off, Jay adding some other words as he ended the call.  
Jay looked up at Will suspiciously, then to Hailey. “How did that happen? I don’t even know where Mouse is deployed!”

Will looked to Hailey, who then looked to Jay. “I cashed in my favour”, she smiled bashfully, catching Ingrid’s smile and nod in the reflection of the mirror. 

Jay’s eyes welled up again, realizing what Hailey just did for him. He was touched.

He took one look at her, the sunrise catching her dimples, totally in awe of how lucky he was to have her in his life. He turned to his side, staring at her, waiting for her to look up at him. The second she did, he leaned down and kissed her lips softly, right in front of everyone. She didn’t pull back, it was her turn now to accept his love. And she did, he held her there for a few seconds, touching his nose to hers afterwards. 

Nothing about this night had been normal, except for that. That, felt like the most normal thing in the world right now.

“I love you Hailey, thank you”, he said as he put an arm around her.

“I love you too Jay”, she replied as she snuggled into his side, putting her arm across his waist, relaxing for a few minutes before they landed and would have to deal with whatever it was that was happening back at home.

He looked off into the distance, taking in the view, knowing that they would be forced to deal with real life once they landed. But, he was sure that this was the right choice. Their connection was deep rooted, like their love for each other. It was hard to put into words. For the first time in a long time, he was actually thinking about his future, their future, and welcoming it, not running from it.


	33. It's a long story

Chapter 33

Their descent into the city couldn’t come fast enough for Jay. He was feeling okay about the trip as a whole, but overall was ready to get off this helicopter. The pilot landed them in a field behind a building the FBI was using as a home base in Chicago. Looking at it, you would never know the kind of operations that were going on inside, but that was the point Jay supposed.

Will, Hailey, Jay and Ingrid all ducked as they were exiting the chopper and onto the grass. Jay contemplated kissing the ground they walked on, he looked over to Hailey and mimicked doing just that and made her laugh. Now that they were back home, there would be lots to sort out. But he surprisingly didn’t feel that anxious about it at all. 

Ingrid showed them inside and had to do exit interviews of sorts with each one of them individually, had them sign some paperwork and other things to wrap up this somewhat classified adventure they had been on.

Jay used his time to explain to Ingrid what went on at the cottage, how they handled the Marco situation, praising Hailey for her efforts during the whole ordeal, how level headed she remained. A true leader in that moment, he didn’t want any of the credit for what happened. He also made a point of explaining the state of their work situation as he knew it and asking to cash in his favour. Ingrid looked at him surprised and laughed.

“In all my years of handing these out, I have never seen people use them as quickly as the two of you have. And for each other nonetheless”, she smirked.

“Hailey has done a lot for me. This wouldn’t be just for her, but for both of us, our team.”

“This is a big ask Jay, but because it’s you, I’ll see what I can do. And especially because of what Hailey managed to do last night. I’ll stall you guys here for a bit longer while I try to sort this out.”

“Thank you so much, I would really appreciate that”, Jay replied as he left the room, telling his brother and Hailey they had to stick around a bit longer.

“I just want to get to Natalie, what’s taking so long?” Will asked frustrated.

“I know you do. We’re going to take you to the hospital as soon as we can. Ingrid has to process some things first. Do a final sweep of each of our houses to make sure everything is safe”, Jay told a little white lie. Agents had already done comprehensive sweeps of their places and vehicles, but Hailey and Will didn’t need to know that. 

Will exhaled. “Alright, that makes sense. Do you think there’s any coffee here?”

“There’s a kitchen around the corner, help yourselves to coffee, breakfast, whatever you guys need”, Agent Lee piped up from her office.  
“Thank you!” Hailey yelled as Will and Jay followed her down, they were starving and in serious need of a caffeine boost.

About an hour and a half later, Ingrid pulled Jay back into her office to let him know what she was able to arrange. He left with a big smile across his face. 

“What is it?” Hailey prodded.

“We can all go home now”, Jay replied, unable to wipe the grin off his face. Everything was going to work out. 

They piled into yet another FBI SUV with all of their belongings and got ready to fight morning rush hour traffic to get home. Hailey was a bit confused where they were going once they missed the exit on the freeway leading to her place, and Jay’s place for that matter as well. It wasn’t until they pulled up to the gates of Cook County Jail that she realized what was happening. 

“What did you do?” She slowly turned and smiled at Jay, who was looking quite pleased with himself.

“You know, pulled some strings. Cashed in my favour too”, he replied smugly, enjoying how happy this was making Hailey.

They saw Adam walking towards the exit gates, plastic bag of personal belongings in hand, dressed in normal clothes and looking as confused as Hailey was.

Hailey and Jay immediately jumped out of the vehicle to go and greet him. 

As they got closer though, they realized he was a bit banged up and gave each other a concerned look. But, his face perked up once he saw them at the gates.

The guard buzzed the gate open and Hailey immediately went and gave him a big hug. Jay followed with a handshake and a hug too.

Their smiles faltered for a second as they checked him over, fresh blood caked on his face, a few steri-strips holding a cut above his eyebrow together and lots of bruising. Some fresh, some obviously not so fresh.

“I have no clue what’s going on right now or how you made this happen, but you have no idea how happy I am to see you guys”, Adam choked out, his voice cracking as he tried to hold back his tears. 

“It’s okay now, you’re safe. We’re going to take you home, get you cleaned up”, Hailey replied, softly rubbing his back.

Adam nodded and gave them both hugs again. This time, Jay noticed him wince when Hailey squeezed his ribs.

“What happened? Are you hurt? You look like you’re in pain.” Jay suggested.

“They put me in gen pop. Let’s just say I didn’t make too many friends in there”, Adam laughed nervously, that lead into a bit of crying as he grabbed his side.

Hailey looked at him for permission to look at his side and he nodded. She lifted his shirt gently and let out a gasp, as did Jay, whose eyes went wide when he saw the mess underneath.

“Oh Adam”, Hailey muttered sympathetically as she lowered his shirt and rubbed his back again.

“It’s alright now man”, Jay added quietly and put a hand on his shoulder. Hailey wiped the few tears from his cheek.

“You guys came just in the knick of time, got jumped at breakfast this morning. Hence the fresh marks”, Adam admitted, looking down at the ground.

“Will’s in the car, we can get him to check you out okay?” Jay told him. Adam agreed and Jay motioned for Will to come closer to them. It was obvious Adam was sore and they didn’t want to make him walk farther than he had to right now. Will jumped out of the car and jogged over to them.

“What happened to you Will?” Adam asked looking down confused at his casted wrist and black eye remnants. 

Will, Hailey, and Jay all looked at one another, unsure how much they could actually reveal. 

“We’ve been on a bit of an adventure ourselves the last few weeks. We’ll explain everything later”, Jay replied for all three of them. Adam seemed to accept that and let Will look him over.

After a brief body exam, Will looked at him grimly. “Judging by the looks of this and your reaction, I would say you do have a couple of cracked ribs. Some of these bruises look pretty bad. We should get you to Med to make sure everything else is okay.”

They were expecting Adam to protest, but instead he agreed. “Alright, let’s go.” His answer surprised his teammates, but they figured he must actually be in some real pain.

Will grabbed his bag as Hailey and Jay stood on either side of him, letting him lean on them and helping him move slowly back to the car.

“Something is different with you guys”, Adam said slyly. 

Hailey and Jay laughed. “Wow someone is working towards their detective badge.”

“Kev owes me twenty bucks when I get back”, Adam grinned.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Depends what you bet on”, Hailey laughed.

“I think I might actually owe Kim twenty bucks when we get back”, Jay sheepishly admitted, earning a smack from Hailey and a laugh from all of them. 

They finally made it to the car, easing Adam into the front seat, where Agent Lee introduced herself.

“Nice to meet you Adam, my name is Ingrid Lee, I’m with the FBI.”

They would have paid to take a picture of Adam’s face just then. “FBI?” He looked confused, the rest of them laughed.

“You two have way more explaining to do than just….this…”, he motioned to Jay and Hailey as a whole.

“We will, don’t worry. Everything is going to be okay.” Adam thanked Ingrid for getting him out of jail, even though he was fuzzy on the actual details of it. Maybe it was best not to ask and just go with it.

They arrived at Med, Hailey and Will got out to take Adam into the ED. Jay stayed behind, explaining he was getting dropped off at his apartment by Ingrid to get his truck and that he would be back to get the three of them soon. Hailey nodded, understanding he probably wanted some private time to talk with Ingrid as well. 

“I’ll need to get back to our office soon too, the rest of my team will be back mid morning. Should probably make sure my husband is alright”, Ingrid half laughed.

Hailey and Jay looked at each other confused…, “Your husband?” Jay inquired.

“Ya, Paul and I are married”, Ingrid confirmed nonchalantly.

Hailey, Jay and Will let out a laugh. “What?! We had no idea!” Hailey exclaimed. 

“We like to keep it that way, for privacy and professional reasons obviously.”

“That makes sense…”, Jay replied. “Is it hard being married and working together?”

“Sometimes. It isn’t always easy, especially in our line of work. But it’s not impossible to be together and work together”, Ingrid replied with a wink, nodding in Jay and Hailey’s direction, clearly implying about their situation. 

“Good to know”, Hailey replied and took that to heart as she smiled at Jay, knowing he was thinking the same. She said her good-byes and helped Will bring Adam inside. 

Will was immediately showered with hugs and ‘welcome backs’ by his colleagues as soon as he stepped through the doors. He wanted to find Natalie as soon as humanly possible, once he got Adam set up anyways. The rest of the doctors and nurses quickly realized Adam needed some care and tended to him. Hailey sat in a bay with him while Will explained the situation before heading off to find Natalie, his eyes permanently searching for her. 

“I’m right here Will”, he heard her voice behind him and felt her arms wrapping themselves around his waist and he almost jumped for joy. 

“Natalie!” he hugged her so tightly, never wanting to let her out of his sight again. 

“Hi”, she said as she reciprocated the hug, rubbing his back for a minute. 

“You’re back at work already?” He asked suspiciously, figuring she would be off still. 

“On modified duties, slowly getting back to myself”, she replied.

“We have a lot of catching up to do. I have so much to tell you”, Will said teary eyed.

“I know. I can’t wait. I’m out of here at lunch today. Meet me at my place after?”

“Yes for sure”, Will said, hugging her again and giving her a big kiss on the lips.

“I’m going to head in and check on…Adam Ruzek?” She looked down at her tablet, surprised to see him in here as a patient.

“Ya that’s a complicated story too. He just got released from Cook County this morning. Pretty banged up. He needs x-rays and maybe some stitches. Baghdad.” Will said. 

“On it”, Natalie said as she headed that way with Will.

While Natalie and Will were talking outside, it gave Adam and Hailey a few minutes of time to talk privately.

“I’m sorry we couldn’t get you out sooner Adam”, Hailey said with a guilty look on her face.

“What? Hailey, no. Don’t feel sorry for me, I’m glad you guys pulled some strings or whatever you did with the FBI to get me out as soon as you did.”

“We were in a mess ourselves…has anyone heard from Voight or Antonio?” Hailey asked.

Adam shook his head, looking lost on information himself. Last I heard Voight was under investigation, not sure what happened with Antonio or what the status is with that…”

“Jay might know more after figuring things out with Ingrid”, Hailey told him.

“Jay did this? He got me out? I figured it would be your doing,” Adam looked surprised at that coming from Jay. They were friends sure, but things got a little murky between them earlier this year, and not just because of his relationship with Hailey. Jay was a keep to himself kind of guy, and so was Adam. Things got a little weird after Al died, Adam fell into a hard time, Antonio… and then Hailey on top of that. He had been distant. 

“Ya he did”, Hailey smiled and nodded. “Did anyone come and see you?” 

“Kim and Kev tried, but I didn’t want to face them”, Adam said with his head down. 

“That must have been really hard. But you’re out now and things are going to be okay. Did you want me to call either of them? Or your dad maybe?” Hailey offered.

Adam shook his head, “No, not yet. I don’t want them to see me like this.”

Hailey understood, and just decided to be there for him for now. She helped him get into a gown and waited to get X-rays. Regardless of everything that happened between them, they were still close friends. She was surprised that Jay was so caring towards him this morning too. But, at the same time not. They were good friends as well, and Jay was a caring person, able to put what happened this year behind them. He knew that Adam needed their help. It wasn’t lost on her that he used his favour to do this, and probably more that she hasn’t found out about yet. As much as he was friends with Adam, she knew he did this more for her than anything. It killed her seeing Adam arrested and he knew that. Jay was always thinking of others before himself.

Jay arrived back in the emergency department just as Adam was getting his x-ray and test results.

“Looks like you do have a couple of cracked ribs Adam. You’ll need to rest for a little while, there isn’t much intervention we can do for that, just manage the pain and make sure they heal properly. It’s going to be painful, but you need to try and take deep breaths as well, to prevent pneumonia. And don’t exert yourself too much.” Will and Natalie told him.  
Adam nodded at that information. “We’ll give you some anti-inflammatory medication that should help with the pain and swelling, but the best thing to do is go home and ice and rest alright?” Natalie added.

“Got it. Thanks guys”, Adam replied. He tried to get up out of the hospital bed by himself, but struggled and sat back.

“Here, it’s alright, we’ve got you”, Jay replied as Hailey helped him put his shirt over his head and Jay extended his arm and supported Adam to a standing position. 

Adam widened his eyes and blinked a few times, trying to make the stars he was seeing go away. All of a sudden he felt shaky and sweaty and was having trouble catching his breath. Jay took note of that right away, he cursed the fact that he was with two detectives right now.

“You okay man? Let’s sit you back down for a minute”, Jay replied.

Adam nodded, unable to get words out at the moment, and started to lower himself back down to the bed before Jay and Hailey could say anything else. His legs were feeling a little shaky. 

“I’m going to go get Natalie”, Hailey said after sharing a concerned look with Jay, leaving Jay and Adam alone in the room.

Jay was hesitant to say to Adam what he was thinking he needed to say, he wasn’t sure how he would react. And from Jay of all people, a bit ironic.

“Hey. I don’t want to push things if you aren’t ready…but from my own experience dealing with trauma… I think you should talk to someone about what you just went through. A professional”, there Jay said it.

Adam looked up at him, and didn’t say anything at first. Jay was sure he was going to be angry for even suggesting that. But people who react that way typically need help the most.

“And you’ve talked to someone?” Adam spat out back.

Jay smirked and nodded, he was expecting this. 

“I have actually, many times. I have an appointment booked with Dr. Charles for tomorrow again. But you know what, I probably never would have gone in the first place if it wasn’t for Hailey. For someone who cares about me seeing me struggle and pushing for me to get the help I really needed, even when I was so against it.”

Adam was quiet for a minute, taking that in. “So you and Hailey…”

“It wasn’t like that back then. I was in a spiral last year, and Hailey really helped me out of it. I don’t know what I would have done without her. So I’m telling you what she told me. To go to therapy and take it seriously. I know you think it won’t help, but it will. And what I just saw a second ago looked like the start of a panic attack to me Adam. I know because I get them frequently still. I’m not saying this to pry or get in your business. I’m just saying as your friend, because I care about you, I think it would be good if you talked to someone.”

Adam looked at him with wide eyes, hearing Jay actually admit out loud he’s still suffering from panic attacks and other lingering effects of things he’s lived through, was a huge step in itself. Jay was one of the most closed off people he knew, this side of him was different.

“Listen, I don’t know what your status is with Kim right now…but if that’s too much you can always talk to me. I know what it’s like. And it can be lonely and isolating, but it doesn’t have to be like that anymore okay?” Jay finished up his speech to find Adam biting his cheek to keep his emotions at bay, nodding at him and staring at his feet. 

“Thanks Jay”, Adam said quietly, making brief eye contact with him. That level of honesty from Jay was again a surprise to him, but Jay had changed quite a bit lately. He suspected it was because of Hailey’s influence, but he wasn’t complaining. A happy Jay was a better Jay, they all knew that. If anything, Hailey has been the best thing for him.

Jay was hesitant to say the word PTSD to Adam, but he feared it might be that on some level, or progress to that. Who knows what sorts of things he saw and went through in there. He was only in jail for a few weeks, but that was plenty of time for bad things to happen, especially as a cop with a huge target on his back. If he could help someone from going through what he has, that would be a good thing.

Hailey came back in a few minutes later, seeing Jay and Adam talking quietly. She wondered what the intense conversation was about, even though she had her suspicions. Adam’s face looked exactly like Jay’s just then, when Jay is about to have a panic attack. Her partner is extremely observant, she was sure he would have recognized that in him as well. 

“Hey, Natalie is going to pop by in a minute she’s just with another patient right now”, Hailey joined them and sat on the end of his bed.

“Thanks Hailey. And thank you guys again, really. I don’t know what to say…”, Adam started getting emotional again. Jay and Hailey looked at one another, this was more in Hailey’s department now.

She scooted over to sit next to him in bed and gave him a hug, comforting him gently as to not hurt his ribs. 

“Shhh, shh, it’s okay. Let it all out, you’re safe now. We’re going to figure this out alright?” Hailey kept repeating to him as she took him in her arms.

Adam nodded and eventually stopped crying, embarrassed that he just did that in front of the two of them. “Sorry guys, I’m a mess right now.”

“Don’t apologize, it’s been a rough few weeks. You’re okay Adam, it’s over now”, Jay reassured him. 

Natalie and Will came back in a few minutes later and checked on Adam. His blood pressure was a bit low, and he was likely dehydrated. They started an IV and gave him some fluids, telling him to sit tight for a while. 

Will pulled Jay into the hallway to fill him in while Hailey kept Adam company.

“He’s in a lot of pain still, we’re having trouble managing it. It’s not just physical…is it?” Will inquired, testing how observant his brother really was.

Jay shrugged and gave his brother a look. “No. It’s more than that for sure. I tried talking to him, I’m just not sure if he’s ready yet. Leave it to me, I’ll make sure me or someone else gets through to him.”

“Okay, sounds good. He might be here for a while, should we call anyone else for him?”  
Natalie jumped in.

“Hailey asked and he said no. But it’s fine, we’ll stay here with him. Hailey won’t leave him here by himself, and I don’t feel right about that either”, Jay explained.

“You two make a good team”, Natalie remarked. “Adam’s lucky to have you guys as friends.”

“He would do the same for us”, Jay smiled and returned to his friend’s bedside.

He came back in the room to find Hailey sitting with Adam, looking like they were having a private conversation. They broke eye contact once Jay appeared, Jay feeling the slightest pinch of jealousy over this. But, he knew it was just Hailey looking out for Adam, it’s who she is, he’s seen it time and time again. Adam needed their support right now.

“How are you feeling now Ruz?” Jay asked.

“I’m alright. My ribs hurt like a son of a bitch though”, he flashed a small smile, showing them that the same old goofy Adam was in there somewhere.

Jay and Hailey laughed and shook their heads. “I know it hurts, but just try to rest okay. And take deep breaths.”  
“Trying”, Adam said wincing and closing his eyes again. Hailey covered him with a blanket and sat back down on the couch next to his bed.

“I’m going to head upstairs actually, if you guys don’t mind. See if I can talk to Dr. Charles today”, Jay spoke up, directing it at Hailey, but making sure Adam heard what he said too. Maybe being open and honest about it would encourage Adam to do the same.

Hailey was also a bit surprised at Jay’s sudden openness, but decided to go with it.

“Ya, of course. The IV fluids won’t be done for another hour or so. I’ll stay here”, Hailey replied.

Adam peeled open one of his eyes to look at Jay, impressed with his boldness. “All good man, thanks for being here. You guys seriously don’t have to stay I’ll be alright.”

“It’s no trouble, we’re avoiding real life for a bit longer now too”, Hailey smirked and rubbed Adam’s arm to get him to settle back down and sleep for a bit.

Jay came back to the ED after an impromptu meeting with Dr. Charles. He felt good about their session and a little relieved that he was able to get in so soon. Dr. Charles knew Jay wasn’t always one to make the first move and be proactive, so he knew that once he saw him in his doorway, it must be urgent.

He pulled back the curtain to find Adam and Hailey both asleep. So, he snuck in the room and sat down on the two seater couch next to Hailey, who was curled up in a ball, leaning on the arm cushion. Will poked his head in, Jay put his finger up to his lips to tell him not to wake them. He pointed to the IV bag, which looked almost done, and Will replied in a whisper, “20 more minutes.” Jay nodded and reached over to his partner, gently scooping her up and pulling her over to face him. He was tired too but he couldn’t imagine how Hailey was feeling. After last night, she must be drained, mentally and physically. She briefly stirred when he moved her, but never opened her eyes, and quickly settled back in against him. Her legs were sprawled over his lap, her head resting on his shoulder. Jay had his arms around her so she would be warm, and tilted his own head to rest softly on hers. The perfect nap, he thought. He dozed off himself a few minutes later, not really caring if Adam or anyone else saw them like this at this point.

Twenty minutes or so passed by before Natalie came back in the room to check on Adam. She pulled the curtain and had to hold back a laugh, seeing how Jay and Hailey were sleeping on the couch together. She was dying to know what happened while they were gone, because looking at them now, something significant must have changed. She would get it out of Will later. Adam was already awake again, staying quiet for a few minutes to let his friends get some rest. He still had no idea where they had been or what happened the last few weeks. But the two of them looked tired as hell so he let them sleep. Natalie came over to his bedside, looking at Hailey and Jay, Adam responding with a shoulder shrug and a small laugh too.  
Natalie quietly explained the next steps to him, telling him he could go home now, he should feel better after the IV he just had. Adam agreed and told her he did. So she helped him sit up in bed, check his ribs again, he said he was sore but okay. The ice there and on his face had helped a lot. Natalie took out his IV and got him ready to go before going over to wake Jay and Hailey.

“I wouldn’t do that”, Adam told her about Jay. 

“He won’t freak out, Hailey’s there. That’s why he’s sleeping with her like that”, Will interjected from behind the curtain, motioning to Jay’s hand slipped under Hailey’s. 

Adam looked like he wanted to ask more, but just kind of agreed, his brother must know him best. He knew firsthand how jumpy Jay was when getting woken up. He nearly ended up with a black eye when he tried it. 

“Sorry, if this is weird…I know you and Hailey used to…”,Will finally clued in to the awkward situation in front of him.

Adam shook his head and raised one of his hands, “All good man. The three of us are solid. Wouldn’t be out if it wasn’t for them. Plus, I’ve known about Hailey and Jay longer than you have probably,” he flashed Will a goofy grin. To which Will chuckled and nodded.

Will took a deep breath, not wanting to tell Natalie or Adam he was still a little nervous about waking Jay, especially after last night. He gently put his hand on his brother’s shoulder, and was pleasantly surprised that Jay opened his eyes calmly, blinking a few times and looking down at Hailey, who was still sound asleep in his arms.

“Hey, Adam is good now. He’s free to go home”, Will whispered, not wanting to wake Hailey after the night they had either.

Jay nodded and asked Will to go grab the three of them coffee’s and any sort of breakfast food he could find. Maybe Hailey would be less cranky if she had a coffee in front of her face when she woke up. Jay gently bounced Hailey across his knee a couple times, no response. 

“Hails, Hails”, Jay whispered in her ear as he kept bouncing his knees and rubbing her back to try and wake her up. Eventually on the third or fourth attempt, Hailey started to come to and open her eyes slowly groaning. She looked up at Jay, whose face was very close to hers, confused as to how she got in this sleeping position, he must have moved her. 

“Rise and shine darlin”, Adam yelled from his bed, getting a laugh out of Hailey and Jay.

“Coffee”, Hailey stated as her first words. Jay was already two steps ahead of her.  
“How about coffee and a muffin?” He teased. Her eyes opened wide now, peeling herself from Jay’s lap. 

“Okay, I’m up”, she laughed. Hailey got up off the couch and made her way over to Adam.

“You okay? How are you feeling?” She asked.

“I’m alright”, he forced a small smile. “Ready to get out of here.”

“Sounds good to me, let’s go”, Hailey said as she put out a hand to help him up off the bed.

“I’ll go pull the truck up to the door”, Jay said as he made his way outside.

Jay pulled up a few minutes later and got out to make sure Adam was okay getting into the vehicle. He was moving a little better than this morning, and managed to pull himself up into the front seat no problem. Hailey closed the door and hopped in the back.

“So, are you two going to explain what’s going on here or what?” Adam said.

“About us? Or…”, Jay joked.

“That’s the only thing that makes sense out of all of this so far, so no. I meant more along the lines of the FBI thing…”, Adam laughed.

“Well…not sure how much we can really tell you. But we’ve been in protective custody for the last few weeks with Will. About that thing that happened back in the fall”, Jay explained vaguely.

“I see. Alright so how did you manage to get me out of prison when no one else could?” Adam inquired more.

“Let’s just say the FBI owed us a few favours because of what happened during our time in protective custody”, Hailey jumped in.

“Say no more”, Adam looked impressed.

“Where are we dropping you? Home?” Jay asked.

Adam hesitated. “Um, are you guys going to the district? I wouldn’t mind coming with you if so.”

Jay looked at Hailey in his rear view, they were planning on going there and explaining everything to the rest of their unit, that is if they were all still working there. They were hoping for that much. All Agent Lee confirmed was that they would be there today.

“Are you sure you don’t want to go home? If you don’t want to be at your place you can always rest at mine or Jay’s”, Hailey said sensing his hesitation about being alone. 

“No it’s okay, I’ll be alright. I just want to know what’s going on. And come clean on my end too”, Adam replied.

“Okay, but if you’re not feeling well, tell us and we can bring you home. You need to take it easy”, Hailey reminded him.

“I will, I promise. I need some interaction with regular people again. My people, you know?” Adam smiled.

“We know, we missed you too”, Jay told him.

They pulled up to the district about fifteen minutes later, slowly making their way up the steps. Steps that just a few weeks ago, Adam touched and thought he was saying good-bye to forever. The first face that he saw once crossing through the doors lit up like a Christmas tree.

“Adam?” Trudy smiled and came out from behind her desk to give him a hug.

“Watch the ribs, they’re broken”, Jay told her before she squeezed the life out of Ruzek, she settled for a kiss on the cheek instead.

“Broken ribs? What?” Trudy asked concerned as she took a survey of the rest of the bruises and cuts on his face.

Adam held out a hand and assured her that he was okay. “Didn’t make too many friends at Cook County.”

Trudy understood, but felt terrible about it. She caught up with Adam for a minute before turning to Jay and Hailey.

“And you two….I have many questions”, she said suspiciously.

“Why don’t you join us upstairs Sarge, we’ll explain everything”, Hailey replied.

The four of them made their way up to Intelligence, Adam taking it all in. So grateful to be back here. 

“Burgess is going to flip when she sees you like this”, Platt muttered as they were walking upstairs. Adam was nervous enough to see her, and everyone else for that matter.

The second Kim saw that familiar face heading up the stairs she ran from her desk towards him. Hailey and Jay were yelling, “Broken ribs, broken ribs”, as she was approaching him so she put the brakes on, stopping herself from jumping into his arms. 

She did the same thing Trudy did, looking him up and down, quickly realizing how banged up he was. “Broken ribs?! Adam…”

“I know, I know. Come here Kim”, he pushed through the pain and wrapped his arms around his former fiancé, and planted a soft kiss on her forehead. She gently hugged him back, lingering for a second too long. Kev ran up behind her, eager to see his best friend. They did their handshake and had a moment. 

“Good to see you bro”, Kevin replied.

“You have no idea how happy I am to see all of you”, Adam said.

Even Voight made his way from his office once he realized who was back in the bullpen. He smiled seeing his two MIA detectives and who they brought back with them.   
“Good to see you Ruzek”, Voight genuinely was happy, even though their last encounter wasn’t a great one.

“Boss. Happy to be here, if you’ll have me back anyways”, Adam replied, nervous what Voight’s response might be, that man was hard to read.

“Spot was always yours, just waiting for you to get back.” They shook hands to seal the deal. 

Everyone crowded around in a circle, having an impromptu stand up meeting. For the first time in what felt like months, they were all back together. Everyone looking to Jay and Hailey to fill in the gaps. The last few weeks had been hell. Voight was under investigation for Kelton’s murder, but was eventually cleared. Two gangbangers who were working for Kelton ended up coming clean and admitting to the murder. Payback for how Kelton threw their friend Wilson under the bus and had him killed rather than get caught for his shady dealings. There was still suspicion surrounding Voight and his absence that night though, so the Ivory Tower had been keeping a close eye on him and the unit. The rest of Intelligence had been working together for the last few weeks. The rest being Kim and Kevin, so there wasn’t much else for them to do. It was noted that Antonio was missing from this meeting, which made Adam, Jay and Hailey nervous.

“Alright, no more secrets. You two have a lot of explaining to do. First off, where have you been? Secondly, why did I get a call from an FBI agent this morning confirming Adam was off the hook and our unit was going to be back together, no questions asked?” Voight looked at them both impressed and confused, needing to know how they pulled this off. 

Jay and Hailey looked at one another, silently communicating how they wanted to play this. 

The two of them started talking at the same time, in sync with each other.

“Okay, well… it’s a long story…”


	34. Hailey and I need to fill out the proper HR paperwork

Chapter 34

Jay and Hailey did their very best vaguely explaining where they had been for the last few weeks, without giving too much classified information away. They took turns explaining different parts of their story, constantly looking to one another for guidance, and for the right words.

By the end, the rest of the unit, including Platt and Voight, looked a little more confused than when they started.

“Basically, all we can really say is that we were in protective custody with my brother for a while. Hailey shot and killed a wanted hit man in self defence, and the FBI granted us a few favours”, Jay wrapped it all up. Everyone had sceptical looks on their faces, like they still couldn’t grasp what was going on here.

“Get out of jail free cards, if you will”, Hailey smirked looking in Adam’s direction. Despite the pain he was in, he even cracked a smile at that one, along with the rest of the team.

“Unfortunately…. Things with Antonio are a little trickier”, Jay paused before turning to Voight. 

That was his cue to jump in and explain himself. He had been waiting until the entire team was back together to fill them in on that situation.

“The night of Kelton’s murder, I was late to the crime scene as most of you know.”

Voight looked around the room, seeing a few head nods, and a few sets of eyes avoiding his glance.

“IAD were initially investigating me as a suspect in the murder, which was completely false. I didn’t tell them where I was or couldn’t provide an alibi because I was helping Antonio after he overdosed.” Voight let out a deep exhale, it was difficult to talk about.

A deafening silence was heard around the bullpen. None of them wanted to believe that Antonio had relapsed. Adam’s face fell, he felt sadness and anger. He took the fall for Antonio, believing that he was protecting his friend. Antonio repaid him by immediately using drugs again. Kim gently stroked his arm, sensing what he was thinking.

Voight seemed to recognize that too. “Adam, I want you to know that what you did, for Antonio and for this unit….we will never be able to repay you. Just know that Antonio is sorry for what happened.” Adam nodded, his anger replaced with sadness for his friend.

“What happened to him Sarge?” Hailey spoke up quietly.

“He called me after he took whatever it is that he did. I found him in his car, passed out. I had to call an ambulance. Once they got him to the hospital and cleared, I drove him straight to a rehab facility. He is still there now. I came clean about the situation that happened in the fall to Brennan, and made an arrangement with her that Antonio would go to rehab, and then give up his badge in exchange for not serving any jail time.”

Wide eyes went around the room, Kim getting emotional. Losing a partner was not easy, especially in this way. She wondered if there was something she could have done to help him. So much happened that day, that she didn’t even think to check in on Antonio. That he would have done that again. It was Adam’s turn to rub her back.

While Adam was comforting Kim, Kevin and Platt were standing there in shock with one another. Jay had his hand on Hailey’s shoulder, her hand rose up to meet his instantly. Voight continued, after seeing the emotional reactions of his unit. 

“This was an extremely difficult decision, and one that I do not take lightly. But it was the best one in order to keep this unit together, this family afloat. Antonio was an important member of this team, and still is. But he won’t be returning to Intelligence. He’s going to move upstate to be with Laura and the kids after he’s done treatment. To focus on getting himself healthy and his family healthy.”

Everyone nodded and took a minute to digest the news. They felt guilt, confusion, sadness creep in. What could they have done differently? To prevent them from getting here. 

“I know this isn’t easy. It’s going to be a big change for all of us. The last year has been difficult. With Al…and now Antonio”, Voight paused to collect himself. “But we are going to get through this together. Take some time today, reconnect with one another. Go for breakfast, have drinks at Molly’s later. Today is your day, no work.”

That made everyone smile, although there was still some awkwardness hanging around the bullpen.

Jay knew just the thing to break the sombre mood and tension in the room. 

“And hey Sarge, while we are all here…”, Jay stammered, suddenly feeling a bit nervous. Everyone’s eyes focused back on him. Hailey was still standing in front of him, just off to his side.

“Go ahead Halstead”, Voight replied.

He cleared his throat, Hailey turning her head back to look up at him and encourage him, nodding and smiling. Giving him the all clear for what was coming next. 

“In the interest of no more secrets, Hailey and I need to fill out the proper HR paperwork”, Jay blurted out, surprised at the blush he felt in his cheeks.   
Everyone was quiet for a second, too quiet. Jay and Hailey looked at each other, then around to everyone else.

“Really? No reaction. None of you have anything to say about this?” Hailey jokingly asked.

“Oh, I’m sorry Detectives, did you want us to pretend to be surprised about this?” Platt sarcastically added.

Jay and Hailey rolled their eyes and smirked.

“We can pretend to be surprised guys, hold on, let’s do that again.” Trudy encouraged them to start over.

“Ahem. Hailey and I need to fill out the proper HR paperwork”, Jay repeated again, with a smile on his face.

“Oh my God, really?!” Trudy exaggerated, feigning shock.

“Congrats you two! We had no idea!” Kim and Kevin repeated.

“This is brand new information!” Adam threw his hands up, the funniest reaction of all.

“Alright, alright. What gave it away?” Jay asked.

“Everything”, Voight added definitively, causing laughter to break out amongst the group. Even cracking a smile himself, joining in on the fun. 

Hailey and Jay smiled and shook their heads, a little embarrassed to be the centres of attention like this, but happy to let their secret out of the bag, officially.

They spent a few more moments together, catching up and discussing what they would do together on their day off.

“I think I need to go home and lie down actually”, Adam admitted from his desk chair, holding his side.

Everyone stopped laughing instantly and went to fuss over him. Kim and Trudy taking the charge. Jay went to grab him an ice pack from the fridge.

“It’s alright guys, really. Just need to take it easy today. No need to fuss”, Adam joked looking directly at Kim.

“Adam. Your ribs are broken, you’re in pain. I’m going to take care of you and fuss”, she replied calmly stroking the back of his head as he nodded at her.

Jay made it back from the lunchroom a minute or so later, two ice packs in hand. One for his side, one for his face. Hailey took one from him and gently put that one against Adam’s side. Jay handed the other over to Kim, who was sitting on Adam’s desk. She set it against the bruise that was turning black and blue around his eye. Adam let out a deep exhale and sank a bit into his chair.

“Thanks gals”, he said softly and smiled, resting his head on Kim’s knee.

While Kim and Hailey were looking after Adam, Jay told him he would go grab his things for him from his truck. Voight followed Jay quietly out the back entrance, wanting a chance to speak to Jay in private.

“Halstead”, he said gruffly, Jay not initially noticing he had been followed down.

“Oh, hey. What’s up Sarge?” He said as he rooted around his back seat, making sure he had all of Adam’s things.

“What you did in there…”, Voight started.

“Ya sorry if that was weird. I just thought we should get it out in the open, no more sneaking around. Well we haven’t actually…yet…but you know…” Jay interjected.

Voight chuckled at his young Detective’s nervousness and shook his head. “No, not about you and Upton. That has been a long time coming. I meant for the unit, what you and Hailey did to keep us all together. I know I’m hard on you guys sometimes, but I’m really proud of you Jay, and of Hailey. You guys went above and beyond. When I told you this unit would be yours someday, I meant it.”

Jay smiled, not expecting praise from his Sergeant. “This unit is our family, Hailey and I knew we had to do whatever we could to keep it that way.”

“You’re still not going to reveal how you got Adam out of prison though are you?” Voight smiled coyly.

Jay gave a little more away than he was planning, but knew Voight would keep it safe.

“The FBI agent in charge of our case…she actually pulled me out of the helicopter crash I was in over in Afghanistan ten years ago. We were leaving the safe house in a helicopter, I was having a hard time. So we just kind of found that out randomly. It was bizarre really. She got a hold of Mouse for me on the way back, it was so great to see him and hear his voice, he’s still over there…”, Jay paused to look at Voight, who usually didn’t show his hand, but had the slightest hint of emotion on his face.

“I had no idea Jay, I’m sorry.”

“That’s okay, I’m trying to talk about it more now. I held it in for a long time, but that did more harm than good, so. Long story short, Ingrid and I had that connection. I asked her to pull some strings for me and she did.”

“Hailey knows about this too? What about Ruzek?” Voight questioned.

“No, Ruzek doesn’t know, and I don’t think he needs to. But yes, Hailey’s known for a while. She’s the reason I’m actually trying to deal with this and figure things out. Everything that happened last year too, she’s always had my back, and helped me through the hard parts”, Jay admitted. 

Voight shook his head, surprised at Jay’s sudden personality switch, more open and honest. Upton must have a strong hold on his heart, stronger than the little crush they all just assumed they had on each other. It appeared to be much deeper than that.

“That’s great Jay. I know I’ve said it before but I really am proud to have you in this unit. And I think it’s only fair if I offer you a favour too. Of your choosing.”

Jay smiled and raised his eyebrows, Voight never acted like this. But he already had an idea in his head, this was perfect.

“Actually there is something Sarge”, Jay replied and explained his plan to Voight.

Kevin and Platt had made Adam and the girls some tea while he was resting in the break room. 

“What is taking Halstead so long?” Kev inquired, looking at Hailey.

“Who knows. Maybe he went on a coffee run”, she replied, gaining nods of that being a likely thing Jay would do.

Voight and Jay appeared back in the bullpen a few minutes later, with Adam’s belongings in hand. 

“You okay buddy?” Jay asked as he sat down next to him.

Adam nodded gingerly, “I’ll be alright. Sore.”

“Okay I think I grabbed everything from my truck”, Jay looked over at Hailey, who made a motion to leave. 

“I think we’re going to head home for a while, we haven’t been at our places, need to sort some things out with that”, Jay spoke for the two of them, Hailey nodding.

The rest of the group slyly looked at each other. “Oh alright you two. Have a good time at “home”, Kim replied cheekily and winked, as everyone laughed. Hailey and Jay clearly wanting some alone time.

They rolled their eyes and laughed, “Alright, get all the jokes out now.”

“Oh we’ve been making the jokes, but now we can just do it to your faces”, Kevin admitted, usually a man of few words, causing the group to laugh. 

“But in all seriousness, we do have some things to sort out. And we haven’t really slept in two days so…”, Jay cheekily looked at Hailey, who was shaking her head and smirking.

“Get out of here you two”, Platt replied. “We’ll take care of this one”, she said referring to Adam, who had found a comfortable position resting against Kim. 

“Ruz, seriously man if you need anything please call us later. Will is around too, if you’re not feeling good”, Jay offered. 

“Thanks guys, for everything really. I’ll be good, just need some TLC”, he smiled and looked up at Kim, who couldn’t hide her smile either. 

“Molly’s later though?” Hailey inquired.

“Down.” “I’m in.” “See you there.” Everyone replied, even Voight and Platt agreeing to make an appearance. 

Jay and Hailey left the station together, and headed down towards his truck to go back home. His home, her home, it didn’t matter. Wherever they were together felt like home to them. They got in, letting out a deep breath.

“We’re finally alone”, Hailey smiled as she slipped her hand under Jay’s free one while he was driving.

He looked over at her, still in disbelief that she was his. Part of him always thought she was, although now it was official. 

“That was a very uncharacteristic Jay Halstead thing to do back there”, Hailey giggled.

“I know”, Jay laughed. “But I just couldn’t hold it in any longer. I hope it’s okay that I did that by the way. I know we haven’t actually…you know. But it just felt like we needed to tell them.”

“Of course. It’s always been more than that anyways. I think judging by their reactions, they had been expecting this at some point. Even Voight, did you see his face when you told him”, Hailey started laughing, causing Jay to laugh, her smile was infectious.

“Ya, I wasn’t expecting that. Funny either way”, he smiled and leaned over to kiss her hand that was holding his.

They made their way back to Hailey’s place and Jay plopped himself at her island while she made them a coffee.

“We have had waaay too much coffee today”, he replied, but still sipped his gratefully.

“I know, just one of those days”, Hailey said.

After a few minutes of comfortable silence while they sat together, Jay spoke up.

“So, I have a confession to make…”

“Yes…”, Hailey said curiously.

“While I was out at my truck talking to Voight, we chatted about some things. And I also asked him for a favour.”

Hailey looked at him confused, but let him continue.

“I told him that you and I needed some vacation time, after the crazy and stressful month we’ve had.”

“Ooh, bold move. We can finally take that weekend away we were talking about”, she flashed him a cheeky grin.

“Even better, he gave us a full week”, Jay smiled as he saw Hailey’s face light up. They both needed time off, to decompress. Both for their own mental and physical well-being.

“A week? How did you manage to swing that?!” Hailey said excitedly.

“I told him about Ingrid. And he understood.” Jay nodded as Hailey put a hand on his knee.

“I’m so proud of you Jay. Really, I think this has been good for you, in a weird way.”

“Agreed. As much as that was a messed up situation, I think somehow, in some way, I was always supposed to stumble upon Ingrid. That everything in my life up until now has lead me here”, he looked Hailey in the eye and squeezed her hand. She smiled and squeezed back.

“And also, I have another surprise…”, Jay was being so secretive, Hailey had no idea what he had up his sleeve. 

He reached down into his jacket and pulled out two tickets. Hailey’s mouth dropped when she saw what they were.

“Instead of just a quiet weekend away here, I thought we could do something a little more adventurous…”

Hailey jumped up off her chair and threw her arms around his neck, kissing his cheek. She was holding two plane tickets to Greece in her hand.

“Jay, you didn’t! This is too much.” Hailey was overjoyed, she hadn’t been back in ages.

“I thought you might like this. The only times I’ve used my passport and left the continent has been for bad things…so thought this might be a fun re-do”, he said, poking fun at himself.

“And we leave tomorrow?!” Hailey couldn’t believe it.

“Ya start packing, we’ll go to Molly’s to see everyone tonight then we head out in the morning.”

She shook her head at him, how did she get so lucky. She wanted to tell him so much right now, but couldn’t keep her eyes off him. 

He seemed to feel what she was thinking, gently setting his coffee mug down, pulling her body closer to his, giving her a knowing stare. He kissed her, gently forcing her lips apart, she even tasted sweet. 

“And Hails?” He whispered as she nodded back.

“I want you to pack that bathing suit from the cottage. For sure”, he smirked.

“Jay Halstead”, she replied cheekily as his hands found their way under her shirt.

“We could have a little preview right now…”, she said suggestively. Jay nodded in agreement immediately. He shedded his jacket and scooped her up, her legs straddling either side of him as he carried her to her bedroom.

They could barely keep their hands off each other as they made their way upstairs. Jay set her down on the bed and went right to work, unbuttoning her jeans, stopping to look at every inch of her beautiful body.

Jay kissed his way down her stomach, teasing her in all the right places. She trembled as she felt his hot breath against her belly button, and then eventually moving further south. He let his tongue do most of the work. She gripped her sheets as she felt herself coming close to the edge. “Jay”, she whispered as her hips swivelled to match his tempo. He stopped, grinning deviously at her, he was good.

She got up and switched places with him, peeling his shirt off as he did the same for her. She straddled him and he slipped into her effortlessly. It didn’t take long, they were so in tune with each other, mind and body. She was moaning his name as they reached their climax together. All the years of built up tension and frustration and hidden love bubbled over. The two of them exhaled and collapsed back into her bed together, pausing to lie alone for a minute and then making their way back to snuggle with each other.

“That was…”, Hailey smiled, out of breath, as her mind drifted elsewhere.

“Incredible. You are incredible,” Jay finished her sentence as he rolled over to stare at her. Suddenly having a new appreciation for her messy curls, bright blue eyes and warm hand intertwined with his.

She moved over to rest her head on his bare chest, hearing his heart beating steadily. He ran his fingers up and down her back, stopping to inspect how stunning she was. 

“So. We just saw each other naked”, Jay announced the obvious, causing Hailey to crack up.

“Oh my God, please don’t ruin this”, she chuckled.

“I’m just saying. That was worth the wait. And I’d very much like to continue seeing you naked.”

Hailey looked up at him, tangled up in her white sheets. “Well we are going to have a whole week in Greece together. Just you and I, lying on the beach, overlooking the ocean, watching the sun set...”

“I can’t wait”, Jay said, feeling the happiest he’s felt, maybe ever.

“Me neither”, Hailey said as she snuggled into him, both of them needing some shut eye.

“Do you think anyone would notice if we didn’t go to Molly’s tonight? I’m not sure I want to leave your bed”, Jay told her.

Hailey smirked, “I think they would definitely notice. Think about how fun it’s going to be seeing their faces when we tell them we’re flying to Greece in the morning.”

“Very true. Let’s get some sleep and maybe some more of this then”, he playfully tickled her as she laughed and squirmed, feeling like she was exactly where she needed to be.

The rest of the afternoon was pretty much spent just like that. 

The two of them were back from somewhat of a grand adventure, and ready to head out on another one. There were many ups and down’s together over the last couple of months, years even. They were each other’s natural yin and yang, going with the ebb and flow of their lives, dealing with whatever the universe threw their way. What they had gone through over the last couple of months specifically brought them much closer, and lead them to a deep understanding of what makes the other tick. They had been tested, and dealt with sickness, and injuries, shootings, trauma’s old and new, and came out stronger on the other side. Now they felt like they could conquer it all as long as they had each other. 

This wasn’t the end of a chapter of their lives, but rather just the beginning, together.

Ahhhh, we’ve reached the end of this story you guys! I hope it concluded how you dreamt it would, I had fun writing the end of this, a little scandalous if you will! I tried to get everything to come full circle and wrap up the storylines I had going throughout. This story has truly been such a creative outlet for myself. As a first time writer, I had no idea what to expect from any of this. But you guys have completely blown me away! All of the kind reviews, messages, follows and people I’ve met through this story has surpassed all of my expectations. I love the Upstead/One Chicago community on here and am so happy I stepped outside of my comfort zone and posted this story back in the spring. Thank you thank you thank you, from the bottom of my heart for following along this year. I am back in grad school right now so I’m not sure when I will post next, but this isn’t a good bye, just a see you soon. I hope to write again once the shows start back up. Until next time! Cheers, - K


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